The following is a visitor-submitted question or story. For more, you can submit your own sleep story here, or browse the collection of experiences and questions other visitors have shared here.

14 And Still Sleeping With Nanny

by Sue
(England, Kent)

My grand child is 14, she has no mum or dad and has been in a rough childhood and has suffered abuse and neglect.. She has to sleep with me and no body else. Every night is the same. This has been going on since she was 6 and she isn't coping too well with it as she is unable to go to any sleepovers.

Could this be because of her insecure past or because she's 14, a teenager and can't sleep on her own possibly lead to mental issues?

Comments for 14 And Still Sleeping With Nanny

Click here to add your own comments

Aug 22, 2011
Security issues
by: Hawkmoon

I believe it is due to fact that she doesn't feel secure without her nanny due to problematic childhood. And sleep time requires feelings of security and sefety above all. My suggestion would be to try to slowly increase distance between you and her during sleeping. I would consider putting second bed in your room if possible and have her sleep her next to you but not in same bed. If that works well, next step would be to increase distance, maybe by putting bed in room next to yours, etc. Also, do you go to bed at the same time? Increasing the time difference between your and hers going to bed can also be helpful.

Aug 22, 2011
by: sue

Thankyou for your help and yes we do go to bed at the same time.

Nov 28, 2012
your a great gram!! NEW
by: Anonymous

She needs this comfort to counter balance the lack of control in her life to help herself from abuse she may have a need to speak of fears fears of abusers taking her while she sleeps? nightmares? talk to her really really talk

Aug 23, 2014
by: Chellie

I think its normal, given her childhood. It shows that you're someone she can trust. Maybe she's afraid of losing you because her mom and dad are gone?

I will be honest and say that I'm 18, will be 19 next month, and I still drag my mom upstairs to sleep with me.. only sometimes. Ive had a super stressed and emotional chilhood, and have very very frequent intense nightmares that only happen when I'm alone. So its probably more understandable for her than it is for me, lol.

Click here to add your own comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Sleep Stories.

Enjoy this page? Please help us pay it forward to others who would find it valuable by Liking, Sharing, Tweeting, Stumbling, and/or Voting below.

About This Site

Welcome! This site is continuously being created by students of Dr. William C. Dement's Sleep And Dreams course at Stanford University.

We made this site as a call to action for people all over the world to live healthier, happier, safer, and more productive lives by learning about their own sleep. We have faith that reading the information provided on this site will motivate you to be smart about your sleep deprivation and strategic about your alertness in order to live life to your fullest, most energetic potential.

In fact, we challenge you to do so! What do you say, are you up for the challenge?

A Note On Visitor-Submitted Questions:

Publishing sleep stories and questions from our visitors is meant to create a forum for open and proactive dialogue about an extremely important portion of our lives (one that occupies 1/3 of it and affects the other 2/3) that isn't talked about enough. It is not meant to substitute a trip to the doctor or the advice of a specialist. It's good to talk; it is not good to avoid consulting someone who's profession it is to help you with this kind of stuff.

If you are in any way concerned about your sleep health, don't wait for an answer on here, and don't necessarily rely on them. See a sleep specialist in your area as soon as possible.

More Questions:

Ask | Answer

The Stanford Sleep Book

Stanford Sleep Book Picture

Dr. Dement's pioneering textbook has been the core text for Sleep and Dreams since 1980, but it has just recently been made available to the wider public for the first time.

In it you'll find a more detailed account of the most important things you need to know about sleep, alertness, dreams, and sleep disorders. Studies, statistics, plus plenty of Dr. Dement's classic anecdotes painting the history of sleep medicine.

Preface | Intro | Contents | Get A Copy

More Sleep Resources

The Zeo

A revolution in personal sleep tracking, the Zeo is a wireless headband that transmits your brainwaves in realtime to a dock (pictured here) or your smartphone. The result? You can wake up and see exactly what stages of sleep you were in during the night! Unprecedented personalized sleep knowledge.

Sleep Paralysis: A Dreamer's Guide

Sleep Paralysis Treatment Book

Ever woken up paralyzed? A surprising number of us have, believe it or not. But few know the actual causes of this phenomenon, and fewer still how to exert control over it. Dream researcher and sleep paralysis expert Ryan Hurd shares breakthrough insights into how to do just that.

Important Disclaimer

Please Note:

The information found on this page and throughout this site is intended for general information purposes only. While it may prove useful and empowering, it is NOT intended as a substitute for the expertise and judgments of healthcare practitioners.

For more info, see our
Terms of Use.