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My Daughter Cannot Sleep Alone, She Is Now 13

by Anonymous

My daughter has such anxiety about sleeping alone, she panics every time we "make" her sleep by herself. When she finally falls asleep with someone lying down with her, she is up within an hour checking to see if someone is still there. It is not restful sleep.


She claims she has awful dreams when she sleeps alone. We had her sleeping on a mattress in our room, which she did fine as long as one of us were going to bed at the same time as she was going to bed. We don't know what to do, she has a true anxiety about this and you can see her fear when she even thinks about sleeping by herself. She is able to sleepover at her friends houses and she has friends sleepover, as long as they are sleeping with her.

We have discussed talking to someone, she states "Im not crazy" I don't need to talk to some stranger. She is very bright and does phenomenal in school.

We need help.

Comments for My Daughter Cannot Sleep Alone, She Is Now 13

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Jan 05, 2011
I can relate
by: Anonymous

I feel your pain. My daughter is only 8 and feel we are headed on the same path your daughter is already on. We have taken our daughter to see her pediatrician and to a psychiatrist with no help. We have tried everything. I do give her melatonin, but that just makes her fall asleep, it does not keep her asleep. she constantly is in a state of panic when she awakens at night. When she does stay at friend's house she tells me that she is up all night and afraid to tell someone she is scared. I wish you luck on your journey to good sleep.

Jan 08, 2011
Thank you for your response
by: Anonymous

Thank you for your response, it makes me feel better knowing others are in the same boat. I did speak to a friend whose daughter is in high school and has similar issues, she did grow out of it. So, Im hopeful!!

Feb 20, 2011
So we are not alone
by: Anonymous

We are having the same trouble with our 8 year old. We are at our wits end with it as our 5 year old son sleeps by himself and goes to sleep on his own.
I can see the fear in her eyes and she just cries and begs us not to leave her. She falls asleep with one of us sitting with her but within an hour or two she awakes and climbs silently into our bed.
She is desperate to have her best friend sleep over but we don't want to risk the night dramas that might happen.

Mar 08, 2011
I used to be that daughter that couldn't sleep!- it will pass
by: Anonymous

I am 21 year old in college and its funny because i am studying for a test for my early childhood major, but i just felt like it would be helpful to ease your minds on the sleeping issue... you see i was exactly like that. It started when i was around eight and lasted up until i was 11/12 I was for some reason terrified to be ALONE and the only one AWAKE in the house. I was in bed by nine thirty / ten nightly and i would try so hard to fall asleep before my dad would go to bed which was at 11 everynight. When i heard him turning the lights and tv off i would start to panic. i have no idea why i was so anxious about it now but it was really hard on my parents and me. However by age 12 i started to get more independent i think alot of things changed just due to maturation. around this time i began and loved to talk to my friends on the phone, luckily my parents were very cool about this (plus we had caller ID so they would know if i was talking too late and they knew who i was talking too hah)
it was like one day i just wanted to be alone and hangout with friends and would be annoyed by my parents, when before i couldnt sleep without them in my room! its crazy but trust me, once your daughter goes into that stage where popularity is the most important thing with a mind set that she is 'toooo cool' for you anymore, the problem will end!

Mar 08, 2011
I am hoping it will get better!
by: Anonymous

Thanks for the reassurance. I do hope my daughter will begin transitioning into her own room/sleeping by herself, to be more independent. Time will tell.

Jul 23, 2011
13 year old with anxiety about sleeping alone
by: Anonymous

Hi i spend a lot of time researching this problem.My son is now 13, very confident popular boy, will go out anywhere with friends during the day until whatever time a long as he does not have to sleep anywhere. When he was 7 we went away for the night and left him with friends, he was unwell and very afraid i was not there, after that became very anxious about me leaving him. This improved but he has always had a fear of me leaving him at night. He likes me to stay up until he is asleep, i often lay with him and end up staying in his room all night, if we go on holiday he gets quite anxious about the room not having a tv, he feels better if the tv is on when he falls asleep. If i told friends of his problem they would be very shocked as he is such a confident boy, but it really gets him and us down as he misses out on school camp and sleepovers. I keep thinking i should seak professional help.

Aug 10, 2011
Yeah, she is sleeping!!!
by: Anonymous

I am happy to report that my daughter has been sleeping in her own bed/room now for 1 month. We allow her to keep the TV on as long as its muted and the brightness is lowered. We think eventually she will gain the confidence to shut the TV off. However, we are just taking it one step at a time. I am the original post and did feel so helpless, it is finally happening! Thanks for all your comments.

Aug 12, 2011
read
by: shjjdjkfjkjkfjflfldjhdjh

Hi. I'm turning 12 and I'm going through what you're daughters going through. I hate it. I can't sleep alone at all,yet I don't know why. I always need someone to sleep next to me. Trust me, it stinks.

Aug 15, 2011
13 year old son with sleep anxiety
by: Anonymous

Hi,intresting to read your comments, my son is the previous post, during the summer holidays i intended to get firm and sort it out but he has had a few nights where he has felt very anxious when going to bed, so i suppose its my fault to i just reassure him i will stay awake next to him until he is asleep. I no i have got to get tough with him and try and leave him to get to sleep on his own but i cannot face the anxiety it causes him at times. To the young girl that posted before...will you go on school over night trips, or to friends for sleepovers... my son will not and it really frustrates him that he cannot....

Aug 19, 2011
same issue. but mines almost 14!
by: Anonymous

I feel your pain, my grand daughter is almost 14 and she has no mum and dad and has had and awful past with drugs and abuse involved in the child hood. She is unable to sleep around her friends and can only sleep with me! If I was to make her sleep in her own room.. She will stay up all night crying like a baby, does anyone think this could be because of her past? Or she has mental issues?

Aug 21, 2011
I feel for you all....
by: Anonymous

I think it is a "true" anxiety and as the previous girl who is 12 posted, she hates it. I do think the kids really want to sleep by themselves but have such such anxiety. I think that a lot of things play into it, not any one particular thing specifically. I really think it evolves and in time works out, but that it is just a lot of support by the parents/grandparents and reassurance to the child that there is nothing wrong with them, a lot of kids have this issue and in time it will work itself out. It takes a lot of patience on the part of the parent/grandparent. I feel for you all, but am happy to say that my daughter is doing ok right now and is sleeping alone. One day at a time.

Aug 31, 2011
My daughter can not sleep alone
by: Anonymous

She is an outgoing regular kid by day and by bed time the whole family becomes fustrated by her sleep demands.
She has a medical history which I do belive adds to her sleep anxiety.
We have not sought Therapy and medication would be out of the question.I'm hoping things will change with time but it seems the more we give in the worse it becomes.
she shares a room with her sibling but still requires someone right next to her!

Sep 25, 2011
ASSURANCE I AM NOT ALONE
by: Anonymous

I have a 8 year old and feel so reassured that I am not alone, she has nver stayed asleep all night since day one, she is 1 of 3 children the other great.
We have got her to go to sleep, sharing a room with her younger sister but every night she wakes up and goes next to me and falls fast asleep and if im not there she will seek the house for me, I so need sleep, it realy effects the whole family.
Thank you for your encouragement knowing I am not alone as when you talk to other parents they tut.

Sep 25, 2011
I have this problem too
by: Anonymous

hi, i am 13 and i have the same issue. i am terrified of sleeping alone. i dont care to sleep alone at mothers house, but at my dads house, i cant sleep by myself. i dont know why but i think it is so scary because no one knows what i am going through and they dont understand how hard it is. i wish i didnt have this problem but whenever my dad mentions me sleeping alone, i start crying and begging him not to make me sleep alone. i sleep at the end of my dad and stepmothers bed every night i am there. :( please help i dont know what to do...

Sep 29, 2011
To the 13 year old :
by: Anonymous

I feel your anguish. Don't feel like there is "something wrong" with you just because you have this anxiety. There is nothing wrong with you and I promise it will get better. You will eventually be able to sleep alone. If its the room at your Dad's house that makes you "scared" then try and identify what it is in the room that scares you, for example- noises, listen to them and figure them out, so that when they occur while you are alone in the room you can tell yourself, "oh yeah that is just..... nothing to be afaid of." Also, if its spaces in the room- confront them before bed so you know all is clear. I will check my daughters closets for her before she goes to sleep. Lastly, calm/relaxing music and reading always help the mind unwind. Just know, it will get better and you will sleep in your own bed at some point, its a process but it will happen. There is nothing wrong with you. Don't be discouraged.

Oct 19, 2011
HELP! I can't get my daughter to sleep alone!
by: Anonymous

I have the same problem with my daughter. She is 12 years old, super popular cheerleader, always on the go; however, when bedtime comes, it's BAD!!! She slept alone until this past summer and NOW she wants to sleep in my floor or she'll insist on staying with her dad. I would never take time away from she and her dad, however, he allows her to sleep in the same room. I don't agree with this at all! Can someone please tell me what to do or how to fix this daily nightmare???

Oct 19, 2011
In response to your 12 yr old daughter
by: Anonymous

Due to the fact that it just started over this past summer and she was sleeping alone prior to that, just fine. I think what I would suggest is to try and identify with her the very moment that she started this fear and what had was leading up to that moment. If there is nothing you can pinpoint, the realty is she is fearful- its a valid fear, as much as you don't want her in your room, she doesnt either. But its an overwhelming fear. Its so hard as the parent to see such anguish. However, it does work itself out. It really does, the only thing that baffles me about your daughter is that she was fine up until this past summer. I would really look for a source of the fear. It may be something you could easily identify and work through. Good Luck and hang in there, it really does get better.

Oct 23, 2011
Im 13 and Im terrifies to be alone @ night!!!
by: Anonymous

Hi I am 13 and am terrified to sleep by myself! I hate it. My parents have tried so many things to help me. Im so scared I cant even be in a room alone @ night by myself. I just have a mattress in my parents room where I sleep every night.
I feel like such a baby :( but some of your comments help me know i am not alone thank you!!!

Oct 30, 2011
To the 13yo struggling with sleeping alone
by: Anonymous

Please know that you are definitely NOT ALONE. I bet there are friends that you have who also struggle with this issue. You just are not aware ot it. It will pass, I promise. You just need to keep trying and don't get down on yourself. One of these days, you will see its ok to be in your room and you are ok at night. Keep trying. It will happen.

Nov 07, 2011
I am the original thirteen year old
by: Anonymous

My mom just shared this blog with me,that she started and i would like to tell you my feelings. I had struggled with the problem for almost 8 years. It made me feel like something was wrong with me every single time i had to go to bed at night and couldn't stay in my room. I cried every night to my parents and had to beg them to let me sleep on the floor in their room no matter how long it took to persuade them to let me. Eventually there was something that came over me that made me feel comfortable enough to stay in my room all night. It took a while for me to fall asleep when i first started, but it started getting better each night. I started over the summer, and so it didn't matter to me when i fell asleep, but there was something telling me that i needed to do it. Whenever i couldnt do it, i felt like there was something wrong with me and theres NOTHING wrong with any of you with this problem. You will eventually get through this issue, even though it may take sometime to do so. It took me years to get over the fear but i have been sleeping alone without a problem for about 5 months now. good luck, it'll happen someday.

Nov 23, 2011
Sleeping alone
by: Anonymous

I just want to say that this is not a big problem. It is inconvenient but not a problem. And, the child is fine, they just
Feel so safe with someone beside them that whe they are alone there is a void and it is a fear of getting scared.

The fears are irrational, usually images and thoughts created in the imagination. Ceative people can be affected by this.
I am 41 years Old now and my son is dealing with the same
Problem. I am very understanding because I had the same anxiety and I was well into my teens before I was able to outgrow it. And that is exactly what happened, eventually I just outgrew it. But it took a long time to feel completely comfortable.

Parents, relax there is nothing wrong with your child, they just have a soft heart, treasure it, they will be grown up and out of the house in the blink of an eye.

Child do not be ashamed and be proud and celebrate all your other strengths, soon you will be strong enough to conquer this obstacle, but don't rush, you will know when you are ready.

In closing I just want to say, work on the strength of your mind by looking forward, whe you start thinking of the things that frighten you, force your mind to think forward to the morning and the activities of the next day.

Nov 28, 2011
thanks
by: yfeemom

Thank you all so much for the comments! I of course "Googled" how do I convince my 11 yr old daughter to sleep alone & this was the blog that I found. yay me! My patience are running really thin now with this deal & these comments have been really helpful!! My daughter has expressed that she is truly scared. We have told her to leave the light on, tv, etc. We have promised major rewards but she still won't sleep all night by herself. Funny thing is...she can sleep by herself in the early morning hours say from 6 a.m. to 10 a.m. by herself....just not all night. For my sanity I just stopped trying to get up after she falls asleep at night. Thanks again, I will pass this info. to my husband & tell him we are not alone!

Nov 30, 2011
My soon-to-be 15 year old daughter can't sleep alone
by: Lynn

I just googled in "my daughter can't sleep alone" and came across this site. Until last May, my daughter always slept alone. Just before year end exams she said she watched "Paranormal Activities" with the kids at school and has been unable to sleep alone since that viewing. At first I thought it was anxiety about upcoming exams, but those came and went and the problem has continued. Her therapist suggested only allowing her to sleep on my floor which she did last night after a major meltdown at 12:30am. The last thing she said to me around 1am was "I'm so sorry" which broke my heart. Her inability to sleep is affecting her health and her mood and I am exhausted. Is it better to let her sleep in my room and if so - in my bed, on the couch, on the floor??? I have stayed in her room - either lying next to her or sitting in a chair. However, within 30 minutes of my leaving she finds her way to my room. I just don't know the right thing to do. I will show her the blog tonight - maybe that would help

Dec 09, 2011
son has anxiety
by: son has anxiety

I have this issue with my son he has anxiety all the time, and takes medicine for it. I really think it is his anxiety that makes it so he cannot sleep. My husband thinks this is awful. I have gone from sleeping with him, to him sleeping on the floor in my room. If I am with him he will sleep all night. If I am not he will be awake all night. I say what ever I am tired- but my husband insists that he sleep alone. Ugh my four year old has no problems, which makes it harder to explain to my husband. Does anyone have suggestions on things that work. If I put him to sleep in his room he will wake up and come into my room. Tonight we decided that he needs to sleep in his room, so we will see how the night goes- I imagine this is not going to be good!

Dec 11, 2011
I am the original blogger
by: Anonymous

In reponse to what to do, I feel in retrospect that the best thing to do is allow them to sleep on the floor in your room. After all that anguish and my daughters tears, it worked out when I just let it go. When I said, fine sleep in my room on the floor, she did. I continued to say, "what will help you sleep in your own room at night?" There were times she had ideas and other times the answer was "nothing". The child truely wants to sleep in their own room, they really really do, it takes a lot of patience from the parents. The child WILL eventually sleep in their own room. As you can see by this blog, this is much more common than you may have thought. I would share this with your spouse and your child. Because its sooooo important for your child to know that this is common, they are not "abnormal". It will happen!

Dec 11, 2011
i know what its like
by: Anonymous

im so glad im not the only one my 12 year old daughter still sleeps with us to but when we bring up the topic she gets md

Dec 21, 2011
my son is nearly 13 and won't sleep alone
by: Anonymous

I'm so glad i'm not alone with this problem..my son is nearly 13 and a confident, popular boy during the day but when it comes to bedtime he just won't sleep alone...i've taken him to my GP who said he WILL grow out of it and gave him medication to help him but to no avail..I blame myself as breastfed him as a baby and used to put him into bed with me during the night to feed him where we always fell to sleep...we've tried everything.... decorating his bedroom several times to make it feel comfortable....and to wat he wants, we've left the tv on and music but nothing works...I have a 10 year old daughter who has never had any problems with sleeping...he really, really panics when it comes to bedtime and you can see the anxiety on his face and that really really he does want to sleep alone but just can't....I really don't know what else we can try as we seemed to have tried everything for him...but he always just says I don't like being alone and want comfort.... :-) <3 xx

Dec 22, 2011
To the Mom of the 13yo struggling with sleeping alone
by: Anonymous

Please don't blame yourself. Your son will grow out of this issue. I did not breast feed my daughter and she had this issue. I did breast feed my son, he is fine sleeping alone. So, I don't think there is a link there.
In regards to my daughter, we tried everything-changed her room about 5 times, tried rewards-items, money, privelages,etc... nothing worked. Finally, over school break I said to her, why don't you try sleeping alone again. My daughter is an all A's student, well adjusted, confident. By waiting for the school break, it took away the anxiety of "having" to fall asleep because school was the next day. This way she could just fall asleep whenever and not have to wake up a special time the next day. Well, it finally worked she is 14 now and sleeps alone. I must say, she doesnt love it- but will do it. As she did it more and more, she felt more comfortable. So, keep trying and he will sleep alone, just takes a lot of patience on parents part and reassurance to the child-they are normal and as you can see, a lot of kids have this issue. Who wouldnt with this crazy world we live in- just turn on the evening news and its scary! Hope this helps:)

Dec 22, 2011
An Idea??
by: Lynn

Has anyone tried hypnotism for this issue?

Dec 24, 2011
I am the same
by: Anonymous

It is horrible. I am 11 and I have had this prob scine i was 8. I have had to sleep with my mum because i try really hard when i am on my own and i just think to myself oh my god i am the only one awake then I break down and cry. It started when i had to sleep with my brother because we had guests in our house for a while. Then i got used tO sleeping with someone. I hope there is a chance for me to be normal again.

Dec 25, 2011
To the 11yo above
by: Anonymous

YOU ARE NORMAL!! Really, this is a very common issue, not a "problem". You absolutely will grow out of it. Continue to try different options about sleeping alone- especially on school breaks, so you don't have anxiety about not getting enough sleep for school. Eventually, you will be able to do it without crying and you will see that it gets easier and easier. Don't feel like you are abnormal, look at all the people in this blog alone, thats just the tip of the iceberg. Hang in there, it will happen!

Dec 27, 2011
I Have The Same Problem
by: ...

I turned 12 in September and i thought i would be able to sleep alone by this time, apparently I was wrong. I slept with my sister though out all the years but this year she is going off to university and I just can't seem to be able to sleep alone I dont know y that is. When I small I was breastfed and I slept with my mom. When I was about 8-9 yrs old my dad told me to go to bed and just say to myeself "I will sleep alone" about 20 times I was fine and I convinced myself to seep alone at that time but now that I'm 12 I just can't. I thought I was abnormal to have this problem but now I know that i am not the only person and I constantly search " How to make a 12 year old sleep alone" on google but I never get a proper solution.
But Thank You All For Making Me Feel Like I'm Not Alone in this.
PS: My parents have tried alot of different things but nothing seems to work with me

Jan 04, 2012
To the lady from Italy
by: Anonymous

I think you are doing everything you can, the most important thing is to support her. It is an anxiety, she will get through it. She really will, she just needs to keep trying and as long as she feels you are behind her supporting her, she will get there. By you supporting her it just reduces the angst she already is feeling. The kids want to sleep alone, they just get overwhelmed with fear. Keep the lines of communication open and it will happen. I use to crawl into my sisters bed when I was in High School if I was scared. My daughter doesnt have a sister, so she comes to me. Thats ok. It absolutely will get better. It really will.

Jan 05, 2012
can anyone give me advice
by: Anonymous

i've been having problems with my daughter sleeping for years. she is 14 this year and still needs me to be with her until she fulls asleep she doesn't like anyone being asleep before her. she has done sleepovers and school holidays with a few tears!She gets frustrated if she cannot get to sleep and then messes around for attention this can last 2 hours. I have seeked medical advice but nothing works will this ever end.my 10 year old is now copying her behaviour.

Jan 05, 2012
In response to your 14 yr old
by: Anonymous

Its probably going to happen real soon, that she will begin to sleep alone. I think as they enter high school years they begin spending more time in their rooms and inevitabley get more comfortable in there. We too had tried pretty much everything from sleeping on the floor in her room, to allowing the dog to sleep in her room, we changed her room around, we allowed the TV on which she does keep doing now. She mutes it and turns the brightness to low. Its kind of like a big night light. I check her closets for her before saying good night, we go through a routine where she will ask if I locked all the doors. I then say good night. So far, its working. She would prefer to sleep in my room on the floor and occasionally I let her. But she is doing great now. Keep trying whatever makes your child feel safe and take baby steps, you will get there.

Jan 05, 2012
Thanks
by: annie from italy

Thank you all for making us feel not so alone. It was a revelation for my daughter to find out she was not alone. Do you think it would be good for the kids to share their experiences with each other? Just a thought. Even though we live in Italy we all speak fluent english
A

Jan 05, 2012
Hypnotism Anyone?
by: Anonymous

My 15 year old daughter developed a fear of sleeping alone 6 months ago. She claims it was due to having watched a movie called "Paranormal Activity" with her friends. I believe the issue relates to a high level of anxiety over a host of issues. She is fine with sleep overs because there is someone else in the room. But she cannot sleep alone. Even if she falls asleep in her room she always wakes up and comes to my room. A friend suggested hypnosis. My daughter's therapist didn't see any harm. Just wondering has anyone ever tried hypnosis?

Jan 05, 2012
I need help
by: Anonymous

I feel your alls pain im 11 going to turn 12 in just a few months and some nights i just lay there awake and everyso often i look over at the clock to see what time it is i see its 10:30 so i get nervous and ty to go to sleep so after what i think is 10 minutes of not being able to go to sleep i look over at my clock to see that it it 11:00 and i have school the nextday THEN I START TO PANIC and so i get my stuff from my bed and go sleep on my moms floor and some times i just lay there and cry and sometimes i just fall right to sleep and i just dont know what to do and how to get out of this weird sleeping pattern please help me anyone please!!!! :'(

Jan 06, 2012
Mum of 13 year old boy ...
by: Anonymous

Hi again im from the eariler post..to the mum who suggested maybe we should get the kids talking i think this would be good for them...i find this site a great help...all the kids have the same pattern and its so good to no there is a good chance they will grow out of it...but if any of you mums are like me a lot of nights i just let him sleep in our room because i am to tired to go through the routine of him trying to stay in his room then about midnight comeing in anyway..then hes upset because he has failed . Hes saying he would like to try and stay at a friends house but he needs to stay in his own room first. Thank god we are not alone..thanks for all the advice it really helps x

Jan 06, 2012
In reference to above
by: Anonymous

In reponse to the comment above, I think when the child starts spending more alone time in their room its definitely a start. I find the best time to "work on" trying to have them sleep alone is on the weekends or school break. There is just too much anxiety on the childs part and the parents to try on a night when you know they have to be up in the morning. So, I did allow my daughter to sleep on the floor in my room without even attempting for her to sleep alone in her room on the nights she had school the next day. I would always ask her to try on the weekends/breaks from school. It did just eventually happen, in retrospect she did spend more alone time in her room prior to the breakthrough. Now its not ideal but she does it, she would still prefer to sleep in my room but can sleep in her own room. I occasionally let her sleep on my floor now but not consistently because I don't want to lose the ground we gained. Now I have my 10yo son sleeping on the floor. I think he is just mirroring his sister, its not as much of an anxiety for him like it was for his sister. Bad habit, is more like it for my son. Im just too tired to keep trying so Im waiting on him.

Jan 08, 2012
13 year old
by: Anonymous

My 13 year old daughter is like all the other children described here. She has a real anxiety about going to sleep and being awake when we are asleep. She wont go on sleep overs. She shares a room with her 10 year old brother and will go to sleep if we are up but sometimes is afraid she wont get to sleep in time so frets. We have told her she can't sleep on the floor in our room anymore. We have told her it is the thoughts in her mind that is making her scared and that they will eventually go away but she has to try to think of nice things. I have told her that is ok to be awake when everyone is asleep. I wake up every night and am awake for sometimes over an hour and I am ok. that seems to soothe her a little. Can anyone tell me what they have done to help their kids get over this?

Jan 09, 2012
mum of 13 year old boy
by: Anonymous

Im the mum of the 13 year old boy in the above comments.To the post above, i have no answers for you, but i am finding these posts a help that we are not alone. My son is a very confident boy who does very well at school, but ths issue in his life really gets him down, he even gets anxious if we go on holiday about the sleeping arrangements so i feel like not bothering again until we have this sorted, but i cannot see an end to it..i am considerng seeing a therapist..but do not want to make more of an issue of it. Also he would love to go on school trips and feels really embrased when he is the only one in the class who does not go....He has had this problem for about 5 years.

Jan 13, 2012
I was that kid - my story..
by: Natalie

Dear all, as I was reading this I felt the urge to share my experience with fear of being alone, because I used to be that kid. Now I am also a mother and can share both sides. Please note, that I am not a psychologist.....

I didn't sleep alone until the age of 13. My mom slept in my bed until then - you can imagine the marriage problems my parents encountered through this. When I turned 13, my grandmother died and my mother went to Thailand for the funeral. So, there I was, alone with my Dad and 2 sisters. I was terrified, didn't know how I can survive 2 weeks without my mom. It was a hard awakening. During that time I've substituted my mom through listening to music and the radio, that actually really did help.

I think the cause of this fear, at least in my case, starts in early childhood. My mom told me when I was 2 or 3 I wouldn't go to sleep and cried for hours if she wouldn't have stayed with me. The thing is, she gave in, which I think was the problem. Children that age are trying to see how far they can go. If you give in, they'll get used to not being alone at night and once they reach a certain age, it is hard to get out of that habit, harder than at age 2 or 3. Eventually your child will have to sleep alone someday, right?

Now that I am a mother myself, this is what I did and it worked great-
It will be a couple rough nights during early childhood, but the child will learn to love sleeping in its own bed and that it is normal and okay. My daughter is having her own room since she is one. I used a baby camera all along the way. She tried to get me to sleep with her until she fell asleep, and actually, as a full-time working mother, it was hard to not give in because I needed my sleep. I stuck to it, and had one week of tough, but after that it hasn't been an issue since. I always told her that if she is scared or something is up, she can always come to us, and I left the light on in the hallway and told her every day that there is nothing to be scared of. Being calm and looking confident in what you say or do is a big deal to children as they trust you in case of their safety.

To those of you who have issues at the moment, maybe try to find a soothing substitute. Like music, or audio drama, leave a little light on in the bedroom and hallway. When my mom left, my Dad bought a kitten... I totally owned that kitten, she slept in my room, I think that also helped. She slept in my bed and I liked to feel her warmth . If it is a habit you need to break, try moving furniture, buy new bedding, or even a new bed. Good luck to you all and remember, this problem WILL solve itself with time if none of it works :)

Jan 16, 2012
Another 11 year old , that can not sleep alone
by: Anonymous

I am another parent having this same issues , sleepless nights , I started sleeping between my two daughters to keep them from talking to each other all night,now my oldest will not sleep alone , when she is sleeping and i getup she tells me ,where you going total panic , its hard on me and my husband . am not alone on this .wow this is hard .I hope we can make it.but thank you for assuring me its common.

Jan 26, 2012
Comment from Christians Mum
by:

First of all sorry for putting the comment up 3 times, its the first time I've been on a blog site. Christian wanted me to say some of my story. I think that he felt a bit better reading the other blogs and seeing that he isn't the only one going through this (stage). I say this is a stage because I really have hope that he will grow out of it, even though it has gone on for so long. and after reading a few of the stories on here it gives us even more hope.
It has been an emotional rollercoaster and I hope that we are at the last hurdle as we have been through so much. He said to me tonight that he wishes he was normal and didn't have this problem and that when he grows up he will walk the streets at night and be the only one awake. He says he wants to move to New York, why?(the city that never sleeps). Like alot of the other children on this blog he is a popular boy and does well at school, although in the last year I think it has effected his school work. He is very caring & senstative with a great deal of empathy and often says why do I feel sorry for too many people Mum? He simply can't switch off his brain at night and just worries that he won't sleep. We recently saught help with 'Cams' and he is now (reluctantly) been put on meds for anxiety at night but we will be taking him off them because they haven't made a difference other than make him emotional and suppress his appetite. In the mean time we just keep going, praising him when he has a good night and trying not to loose it when he has a bad night. next step we think we will try hypnotherapy, fingers crossed what have we got to loose.

Jan 27, 2012
writing helps
by: annie from italy

well the writing seems to be helping.. if I hang out in her room a bit before she falls asleep she can now get through most nights. I was wondering about giving kids meds though. In Italy they don t medicate kids as easily as they do in the united states. for teens our osteopath/homeopath gave us magnesium which sort of relaxes the muscles. maybe you should check with your local health food store. well my daughter will write this weekend
all the best from italy
A

Jan 29, 2012
13 too, and STILL CANNOT SLEEP!
by: Anonymous

I knwo exactly what your daughter is going through. I'm 13, and I cannot fall asleep by myself! I'm just too scared. Its weird, because I was able to sleep by myself before but now I can't. I have to take Benedryl every school night to be able to fall asleep! And sometimes the benedryl doesn't even work! My grandparents says its because of everything I have gone through, but honestly I'm not so sure. we have tried talking to doctors, but nothing works. I'm really confused!

Jan 30, 2012
Divorced
by: Anonymous

Hi, this blog has helped me understand that we are not alone. My daughter is 7yo from divorced parents. My ex wife was married shortly after our diverce and my daughter has always slept alone in her mothers house. On the contrary I've always been very cautios in sharing my daughter experience with other artners until I felt some stability. During that time she slept in the same bed with me and shared very good moments and a strong bond. Last year I met a fantastic woman Whom I feel is the one. We have been living toghether for the past 5 months and have tried to persuade my daughter to sleep in her own bed liitle by little. We have good days and very bad days, with nothing in between. We've rearranged her room, new bed, new bedding, new paint. Have promised her a cat if she stays roughly 5 nights in bed, but with no luck. It is very fustruating. And although it is not dampering the relationship with my new fiance, I'm very concerned this will continue.

Jan 31, 2012
To the blog above
by: Anonymous

It probably will continue. The reality whether you met this great woman or not, she would still be sleeping with you. Be careful because to her she is going to feel "replaced". I know its difficult but I think you have your hands full because its going to be a very sensitive area having a new lady in the house. They may have a great relationship but be careful about kicking her out of your room at this time. You may want to wait not even approach the issue for a little while then delve into the subject and have a plan. But give her time to adjust to the new situation. It will happen, but you will need to be extremely patient.

Feb 23, 2012
i was the same
by: Anonymous

I understand you. I had the same problem as your daughter does. I was bright at school and life was normal. I had that problem since I can remember, I don't think I slept by my self as a baby, toddler, etc. I stopped sneaking into my mom's bed when she started snoring. Then I started sneaking into my sister's bed but she had no patience and pushed me right out. I convinced my self that sleeping in my bed was more confortable than sharing the bed with someone that snores. I was also afried of (unreal) things but was so afried of it I didn't even dare to say what I was afriad of. Whatching XFiles thinking it was real didn't help me much either.

Feb 25, 2012
to 13 year old who is ok now
by:

How did you get over this problem? Did you just decide everything was going to be ok one day? Was it a difficult transition? I would really like to know the details of how you got over this so I might be able to help my daughter get over this? She is 13 now and just as you described yourself. She is terrified she will be the last person asleep in the house.

Mar 01, 2012
In reference to above
by: Anonymous

I cannot express enough to you, as much as it seems like this will never end, it will. Your son or daughter will figure it out. They will sleep in their own room. They will be able to go to college and be away in their own space. It will get better, my daughter is still doing well now after almost 1 year of sleeping on her own. I am the original blogger. So, there is hope and it will get better, just lots of patience and reassurance:)

Mar 10, 2012
In reference to above
by: Anonymous

I think in regards to your son,I would try and identify with him- what it is that he think will happen if he doesnt fall asleep first. There must be some anxiety he is feeling. If he is afraid of losing his parent, he needs to identify that feeling and you can all work through it. It is a very valid fear. There are many books available to help you with that fear and working through it. I think once he works through the fear, he will probably be fine. Good Luck!

Mar 10, 2012
Books.
by: Anonymous

I have asked a number of times what worries him when he is panicked and he usually says that something might happen to me. He is very attached to me but lately he is worries when his dad is not home at bedtime (that was never too much of a issue). He is any only child , very sensitive. He has just started high school and the only issue so far was the camp which was last week. The school had assured me that he wasn't the only one not sleeping there. Unfortunately a teacher told him to toughen up and not be so selfish. This upset and he now feels guilty. I assured him that he wasnt selfish and he would get through this.
Can anyone suggest books.? Thanks

Mar 19, 2012
Hi
by: Ethan

Hi I'm 13 I had that problem and well I found out boy scouts helpt me or if it's a girl venture scouts which is like boy scouts but with boys and girls . You go camping evory month . Girls with girls boys with boys. Or join a sport

Mar 20, 2012
tantrum
by: Anonymous

I am 10 and still afraid to sleep by myself one day my brothers freind was staying the night and my baby brother usally sleeps with me but he slep in my parents room cause the boys had to use his bed to sleep on cause they needed three beds and when i heard i freacked out and my parents were trying to tuck me in but i kept on crying it was so bad my brothers thretin to come in there and smack me and afer ihad my big tantrum my dad set me down and started talking to me and asked why i did that and i had no answer then i had to go to bed and i didnt sleep in my room i slep in my dads bedrrom floor and then the next week at counseling they asked me the same question why did u have tantrum like what were u thinking about first i said nothing then she put it in a easer way and i said i wasnt thiking about anything at all when i found this website now i know i am not the only one that doese this my dad thought i was crazy

Mar 20, 2012
Hey
by: Anonymous

Hey Im 11 and i used too be almost exactley like U! i did i for 3 yrs but i have gotten WAY better! i think its because u grow up! i sleeped wif mi mum and dad for like couple months then i went too mi own bed and sometimes they slept wif me.now i have gotten better but i have a nightlight and a noise machine.(makes rain sonuds.)it mite help u relax and calm down!

Mar 20, 2012
^^^^^^To the above comments^^^^^
by: Anonymous

You are absolutely not crazy because you are afraid to sleep alone. Look at how many people struggle with this very same issue. I can absolutely guarantee you, that eventually you will be able to overcome this is issue. Hang in there, keep trying is key- keep trying different methods that make you feel safe and calm. Good Luck!

Apr 03, 2012
Im 13 and i cant
by: Anonymous

Im 13 and i still can not sleep alone in my own bedroom! I dont know whats wrong with me! I looked it up on the internet and the phobea of sleeping alone is called monophobea,please help somone..:'(

Apr 03, 2012
to above comment
by: Anonymous

First, there is nothing wrong with you. As you see from this blog, many kids of all ages deal with this issue.
I would first try and identify what it is that gives you anxiety about sleeping alone. Is it noises, is it darkness? whatever you identify, try and embrace it, say to yourself: I will check the closets, under the bed, any noise I am not familiar with, I will find out what it is, so that when you hear it again,you can identify what it is. If it is darkness, use a nightlight. Try and have calming music on if you can, water trickling/ wind blowing something relaxing. Try not to think of a million different scary thoughts, rather focus on one thing- repeating a positive verse in a song or bible verse or something that will allow you to relax your mind. You can do this, and you will- many many kids have this "issue", not "problem". It will improve and you will sleep alone, I promise!

Apr 09, 2012
im almost 12 and i cant stay over at a friends or sleep alone what is my problem
by: Anonymous

i dont know but i just cant sleep alone when im going to bed on my on i just think scary things and i frick out i dont know what to do.Ive done it before sometimes but my house too is very big and my parents bedroom is far away and if i scriam they wont here .when i stay over my tommi gets realy sore then i barf its very imbarising having this problem.pleas help what shuold i do¡¡¡¡

Apr 10, 2012
13 and i cant go to sleep help please?
by: a child.

I know, this might sound like the other comments above.. but oh well.
I'm 13 years old.. and I can't sleep by myself!
It sucks, of course.. I used to play really creepy games.. and look at real creepy videos when I was a wee bit younger (like probably 11.. or 12..), which I really shouldn't have done because now I can't go to sleep until 2 or 3 am, then I wake up after an hour.. then get extreamly scared and go into my parents room..I try sleeping with a nightlight ( yes very emberassing....) and that's not working so much.. when I close my eyes I see really creepy things.. I keep telling myself its fake.. cause that's all it really is but I'm still scared!! Please someone help? Please!!! :"(

Apr 11, 2012
Hang in There!!!
by: Anonymous

In regard to the "creepy visions", you should facing that fear, and what I mean is- first, keep telling yourself,"it is not real", "this will not happen", have a plan in place. Every night before bed, go through your spaces, do a check list and check everything that may give you the impression that you are not safe. Once you complete it, starting with relaxation- yeah it sounds goofy but it works. If you have soothing music, put it on. Get comfortable in your bed, close your eyes and start picturing a waterfall, or maybe a favorite place that you have seen or visited. Cute cuddly animals, envision yourself petting the baby animals. Get your positive image in your mind, then start taking nice slow deep breaths. Counting slowly on your exhale, 10-9-8-....... and then repeat. If that isnt effective, try repeating a positive verse from a song or the bible, something positive, over and over in your head. You will do this, you really will, you just have to keep trying!! Good Luck.

Apr 12, 2012
Mum of 13 year old boy....
by: Anonymous

Hi I have posted on this site twice some weeks ago, i was saying then about my concern that my son has had this fear for about 6 years, has a bed in our room, does not go on sleepovers , we also have issues when we go away ...can he still sleep with us,,,is there a tv in the room...this comforts him, well i wanted to share wiyh you that 2 weeks ago he asked to sleep at his friends house, i had a txt from him about 1am to say his tummy felt strange and he was scared as everyone was asleep but i reassured him and much to my delight he stayed all night. The last week we went to stay with friends on easter break and i was dreading him wanting to sleep with us, but he slept alone...with the tv on all night....but he did it. He is so chuffed and so are we to at last see some improvement. We are home now and he still wanys to stay in his bed in our room but said he will go in his own room when its school holiday!! I feel at last he will not be there forever, as other comments have said on this site "they will grow out of it" lets hope my son continues to improve, hes a lot less anxious about bed time in the laast few months.

Apr 12, 2012
To the Mum above
by: Anonymous

I am so happy to hear that about your son. It is so amazing how things can change in a day or two. I will tell you, my daughter still will come in my room, and beg to sleep on the floor but she is able to sleep in her own room, I make her because I don't want to lose what we gained.

Apr 14, 2012
Sleeping alone
by: Anonymous

I used to have that when I was little and my mum would have to air in my room and when she got up to leave I would be awake in a flash. The way I grew out of it was I really wanted to go on a residential school trip and one night I said to myself 'Right, you want to go on this trip so you've got to be able to sleep alone' and I found out I went to sleep fine! Also if you get her relaxed before she goes to bed, maybe a bath and hot chocolate and I found what helped me was having and extra matress and closing my door a little. It also helps to find out why she doesn't like sleeping alone and talking about it. Hope this helped!! :)

Apr 15, 2012
I dont know what to do
by: Anonymous

HI i am 13 almost 14 have the same problem this has been happening since i was about 8 what do i do???? I have tried the TV reading books everything!!! but i just sleep on my parents floor!!I am glad I am not alone it makes me feel a lot better that their are more people with this anxiety issue then just me

Apr 15, 2012
To the above comment
by: Anonymous

I really think the key is to keep trying, you are going to have to make an effort to chose to sleep in your own bed and at least try. Sometimes, its easier to sleep in your parents room on the floor, you feel safe and no worries. However, you are still safe in your room, you just don't realize it yet. You have to keep trying, try to make yourself feel comfortable, safe and you will overcome it. You really will, but it does take an effort on your part. It doesnt just happen. Even after you do conquer this fear and sleep all night in your room, its not easy. You have to just keep doing it, it will get easier. Don't give in to the fear, you can do this, really. Keep trying... You will do this, I promise!

Apr 16, 2012
17 and still cant sleep?!
by: Anonymous

hello i was wondering if anyone could help me , im seventeen years old and i still cant sleep no matter what i do if my mother or step dad are asleep before me my brain convinces me that someones in my home and then if im in the dark i keep pictureing someone poping there head round the door but then i get up and no ones there.
but then its a different story when my parents are awake i fall asleep straight away?.
ive just been reading all the previous comments and ive already been through the 'i want to be popular' stage and no change.
i dont really know how to use thia website so if anyone could help me please email me.
nadinerich@live.co.uk

Apr 17, 2012
12-13
by: K

Now I don't feel as bad I'm 12 and half of the time I sleep fine in my bed but sometimes. I lie. There for hours trying to fall aslwelbutfkr some reason I can't no matter what. I dos be up. Half the nigh. Or I have to going my mom's room and sleep there just saying my parents are divorce. If tht matters at all

Apr 19, 2012
it's not as easy as you think.
by: Anonymous

hi, I'm a thirteen year old girl, and yes, I still can't sleep without my parents nearby. I can't go to sleepovers and I don't feel 'normal'. Any suggestions?x

Apr 24, 2012
It's not as easy as you think
by: Anonymous

To the girl who posted above, I know it isn't easy. My 13 year old is going through the same thing. Here are some of the suggestions we have found or tried: keeping a flashlight near and maybe a book, keeping her iPod by so she could listen to music if she wakes up, some people have talked about getting a noise machine that makes sounds of water or other soft sounds, keeping lights on in the house, some relaxation time without tv before bed or meditation, writing out your fears and really thinking about whether they are likely to occur, a warm drink of milk before bed. Another idea is visualization, when I was young I used to think of my bed as a safe island. Once I was in it with the covers up, it was all safe. Or think about putting your worries in a box under your pillow. Or think about a scary dream you have and give it a surprise more happy ending. Good luck, and know you are definitely not alone, there are lots of kids and parents working through this and it will get better.

May 03, 2012
My issue
by: Jessica

Im almost sixteen, my birthday is in July and I have an 18 year old brother. I have the same problem as the original 13 year old. Only problem is, Sleeping with my parents or in my parents room, having an animal sleep with me, or the tv on doesn't help at all. I can only sleep if my brother is in the same room as me. This has been going on since I was 6. I want to know why I can only sleep if my brother is in the room with me.. Someone please help :/

May 10, 2012
To the 17 yr old and all the other scared kids
by: Anonymous

I have a 13 year old daughter who has the same problem as everyone else here. After searching on the web, I discovered a program based on cognitive behavioural therapy that I thought may help her. I bought it online and she has been listening to this and it is helping her. She has now moved from sleeping within arms reach of me to sleeping in the corridor where she can see me if she gets scared. she falls asleep in her own bed if we are awake when she goes to bed. The next step is to sleep on the couch around the corner but still close to our room if she gets scared. Step by step I believe she will get there. The catch with this program is that you have to want to get better, and you have to work at that and take it step by step. The child has to want to do it. I think the program is fantastic, because it is a self help program. I believe it is worth the money. This anxiety disorder problem is in your mind and the program helps deal with anxiety of all kinds and helps you to think differently and train these thoughts out of your mind. It is exactly what a psychologist would do with you but for little expense. It is called "Turnaround" http://www.myanxiouschild.com/ There is a lot of information on the website for you to decide if you want to try it. It is not a mickey mouse program and was shipped promptly. Hope this may help a few of you out there.

May 13, 2012
Agree with the above
by: Anonymous

Absolutely I agree with the above comment, if the child is so anxious that they cannot sleep in their own bed they surely don't need the fear that they cannot access their parent because the door is locked! This will definitely increase the childs anxiety. I wish it was as easy as giving the child a teddy bear and for those that this technique works, thats great. But the fear goes much deeper for some children. It does take a lot of patience. The reality, the child will not be sleeping with you or in your room forever.

May 31, 2012
With a deadline in Puerto Rico
by: Anonymous

My 11 year old (future) stepson has shown an irrational fear at bedtime as well. In his case, we haven't even tried making him sleep in a separate room yet. We have been too busy getting him to sleep on a bed *next* to ours rather than with us. He's not even alone on that 2nd bed. His stepbrother and sister stay with him as a way to help him feel like he's not alone. After many months and the same routine every single night he's with us, we have finally convinced him to sleep on that bed next to ours, but even then, as night approaches, he still always asks if he can sleep with one of us. He'll ask me first, then later his dad, then asks the other kids to try and convince us.

What's particular about this case is that he has been asked time and time again why he thinks he's afraid of sleeping in a separate bed (let alone a separate room) and he always says he has no idea. We've tried and tried to get him to identify the source of his fear but all he can muster is that he's "used to" sleeping next to his mother or his grandmother (who both still let him do that, which does *not* help, but as much as we've talked to them about it and they agree, when he starts insisting, they always give in).

Here comes the deadline part. His dad and I are getting married in 45 days. We're taking the extra bed out of our room and are in the process of getting bunk beds for the boys in my son's room and putting a twin-size bed in his sister's room.

Ideally, we would like them all to be used to sleeping in their own rooms by the time we get married and he officially "moves in". His kids only sleep in our house about one or two nights every weekend. We think this is a good time to set our new family rules, bedtimes, etc. and this is a big part of it.

Other than bedtime, my stepson is active in several sports and is a happy, loving, healthy, well-developed kid.

This blog/forum has been such great help for so many, I'm hoping it can help us too! I'll share it with my (future) hubby.

Thanks!
With a deadline in Puerto Rico

Jun 03, 2012
we need sleep!
by: Wendy

We have just begun this awful journey with our 10 year old. We have 3 other children- 2 older and 1 younger and this has never happened before. She hyperventilates, screams, cries, and is certain there is someone in her brother's room or her sister's room. We have finally let her sleep with her sister....but a couple of nights ago, this no longer worked. Now she is on a mattress on our floor, but tonite, that is not working....she is sitting up, panicking that someone is in the house. She is waking us all up and we are at wits end. She is so fearful. We do not watch scary tv, we live in one of the safest towns in the US. Are there any doctors on this site that can explain this phenonomon? Does it coincide with puberty? Do drugs help? I am encouraged that we are not alone, however, the prospect of living like this for years is not good to me.....the past few weeks has sent our entire family into a tailspin. Any docs on this blog?

Jun 03, 2012
To the last 3 blogs
by: Anonymous

First off, I am the original blogger. It was my daughter who was 13 at the time and could not sleep alone. I feel your angst, oh do I. My daughter would get so worked up and it was so difficult. We did try everything, with the exception of medication. I never went that route. I didnt want her to feel like she had to rely on a medication to help her sleep. So, what worked, was pure perseverance. We just kept trying. She is fine now, she goes to sleep in her own room and sleeps through the night. However, she does have a check list that she goes through before she goes to bed. We have to make sure the doors are all locked, she checks her closets. It really helps to try and identify what the fear it, are they worried someone is going to come in the house. If so, show them each entry that you have locked. Show them the windows are locked. Then devise a plan, what they can do if they are frightened. Have a noisemaker, a flashlight, something they can use quickly to alert you. My son who is 10 is coming into our room now, he falls asleep to the TV in his room but wakes up in the night and comes in our room. We are using the summer to work on this, it really is the best time to work on it. This way you don't have the fear of them not getting enough sleep for school. So, take advantage of the summer. One person referenced, "tough love", I agree this doesnt work. These are valid fears, however you have to really guage what the fear is so you can conquer. Present ideas to the child that may help. Good Luck, once again it definitely will happen but unfortunatedly it may not be the time you would like it too. Be Patient:)

Jun 06, 2012
I was 12
by: Anonymous

Ok i did this i jut turned 13 and a few months ago i stopped sleeping with my mom i did it it was tremendesly hard but im fine , get her a nightlight bright, and if you have to a tv and advd player if you get those she can cuddle with stuffed animals and watch tv and get the instinkt someomes in the room with her!

Jun 07, 2012
Be a parent!!
by: Anonymous

I read some of these rediculous posts. Your seeking help when all you have to do is realize this.. 1) you should have been whoopin ass when they were little.. 2) your too soft and 3) you let your child get the best of you!!
There is no excuse why a 13 yr old should be sleeping with you if she can do everything else on his/her own.. I say tell their asses that you don't want a dam teenage baby sleeping in your bed..! It doesn't matter what someone goes thru.. If you want more sleep by yourself or simply a night to have your husband yourself then tell them your gnna whoop their ass if they don't straighten up... It sounds like your dealing with brats that get what they want right down where and how they want to sleep. I wish I would have my daughter cry to sleep with me!!

Jun 07, 2012
Bored? Uneducated?
by: Anonymous

To the previous comment. I have no idea why you ventured on to this blog.....seems to me you must somehow have misspelled "ignorant, uneducated fools" and wound up on this blog. Do not venture into a world you don't understand and are incapable of understanding. There may be a small percentage of parents on this site that got what they deserved catering, babying, or providing an inadequate environment for their child to bring on such a syndrome....but absolutely NO ONE benefits from your ridiculous rant that proves you have NO idea what you are talking about. Don't point a finger or judge lest ye be judged. Get off this blog and take your cheery little self somewhere else. I have no time to read your ridiculous input in my very busy day.

To an above comment. Tried your idea of taking her through the house as I locked windows and doors...talking about the day...not really drawing attention to the door locking. By the time we were done, she had already begun working herself into a panic. :( I guess it had to be tried, but I wont do it again.

I have met with a holistic doctor who increased the melatonin (natural)....it takes 2 weeks at a good dosage to begin to help....and I think it is. It is not a medication or addictive. At least the terrors and anxiety have "toned down" a bit...and she is falling asleep faster. Still waking at least 4-6 times a night, but performing well during the daytime....which never ceases to amaze me. Wishing you all a better night sleep...

Jun 08, 2012
IM 15 AND I HAVE THE SAME PROBLEM
by: Anonymous

comming from a child who has this same problem, its something more deeper than sleeping alone, i was too scared to admit it to my family but i have a fear of
being alone, and something happening when im alone, i try to go to bed alone at night but it is sooo terrifying, i get really bad anxiety, and if i finally fall asleep in my own room i sleep walk into my mom or my sisters room so you need to talk to her now and find out the root of the problem

Jun 18, 2012
I know what you mean
by: Anonymous

My daughter was afraid that someone was going to kid naP her. She finally started sleeping in her room when she was 11. Her friend had a fear of not being home and she couldn't sleep over, this made my daughter so mad after repeating the same process of her friend leaving at 10. One night her friend left she got so mad that she conquerd her fear of sleeping alone. To show that her friend should conqure her fear too. Now she is fine if I tuck her in.

Jun 23, 2012
me too!
by: Anonymous

I know how your daughter feels. I'm eleven years old and I have a really hard time slepping alone. My mom is tired of me telling her that I cant sleep. I do it every night and I am sick of it too! I want to be abutle to sleep in my own room by myself but I always seem to end up sleeping with my mom. I want help soo badly!

Jun 27, 2012
My experience
by: Anonymous

Hi I'm 28 & female - this will be posted in multiple parts :) I guess I have a lot to say but I hope it is helpful.

I have struggled with sleeping for as long as I can remember.
I would have the worst nightmares & I guess you would call them day dreams but they were at night while I was awake & couldn't sleep.
My parents were very loving but also raising 4 children & ran a tight ship. I was not allowed to sleep in there bed. When we became 6 weeks old then we were in our own room. I was the only girl & when I was approx 4??? My parents moved me out of the room with my brothers. I would cry at there door wanting to sleep with them - at first they let me & when it became an every night thing they told me I had to sleep in my bed & when I started to sleep outside the door of there room, little by little my dad made me sleep down the hall then little by little into my room..

Jun 27, 2012
28 female continued
by: Anonymous

Bc = because & sorry for all the misspellings - I was typing on my phone & typing too fast
Hope it was helpful ?
There are things in life that are hard & scare us but we can't let them win & steal our joy.
Be brave, understanding, & never give up even when it seems impossible.

Jun 28, 2012
Used to happen to me
by: Brooke

From 3-8, I could not sleep alone. My room was right next to my parents but I still couldn't even sleep in there. I once had a nightmare that felt like real life, it almost was. So I got scared to sleep alone. But my parents got a dog, and said if I would sleep in my own room, he could sleep with me. So I got over the fear and started sleeping by myself. At the beginning my parents would come in, and wait for me to fall asleep, then leave. Then soon enough they didn't have to anymore.

Jul 06, 2012
I kind of have the same issue
by: Kaitlyn

Hi. I kind of have the same problem. I am 11, almost 12, and I share a bedroom with my sister, whom is 13, alomst 14. When my sister goes to sleep overs at her friends house, I am KIND OF scared that nobody else is in the room with me. I don't cry and get upset, but I get scared. Usually I leave the TV on all night so I can sleep, or I wake up in the middle of the night and turn it off. I fell wweird that I get scared, but I'm glad that I don't cry like other people. I already have a problem that I cry when I don't understand someting in school or when I get frusrtated. Now my sister is going to sleep away camp for 2 weeks, so I will be alone for 2 weeks (I am probably gonna have like 3 or 4 sleep overs though) and I don't know what I will do. I guess I will keep the TV on for the whole night...
Also, when my parents go out to dinner, and leave my sisters and I alone, I always get scared that somebody is going to rob my house... I don't know why, but I feel like I hear creaks from downstairs...

Good luck to the kids who can't sleep at night at all unless they have somebody with them

Jul 08, 2012
thank you!! From Kent UK
by: Anonymous

I am so happy to have found this site!! My daughter is 9yrs and out of the blue is having real trouble sleeping!. I now sit beside her bed until she is asleep but she often wakes and we go through the same process again. I have tried to not make a fuss and just keep reassuring her its normal and can happen to anyone! She has mentioned the missing girl Maddy several times and I think kids in school have been talking about it and it has really worried her! I've tried to also make bedtime as stress less as possible when i sit with her i read to her until she is really sleepy and a friend reccommended a Bach sleep rescue that can be used for children and it really does seem to help. after reading these posts I know it may take time but I will just keep reassuring. but it so helps to know that other parents have the same problem with the same worries and fears for thier child. thank you.

Jul 09, 2012
I had the same thing
by: Anonymous

I'm twelve and had similar I slept with mom till I was like seven and then she bought me a new bed but I got nervous and couldn't sleep without her at about age nine she closed her door and locked it it worked but I cried for about twenty minutes after I had nightmares alot and was semi stressed about school

Jul 17, 2012
That thappend to me.
by: Anonymous

I use to have the same problem when i was 13 but now im 14 and it went away when we moved. I dont think its bad dreams i think it has something to do with something in her room or any other room because when i went out of my room i could sleep fine. But that might be just me. Try doing thing. When she is ready to go to bed go with her and when she falls asleep watch her eyes because if they move it means she is dreaming to having a nightmare and if they dont then i think it might have something to do with her room or the dark or mabe she needs a light on and the on and the T.V on low i hope this helps.

Jul 20, 2012
Please help
by: Anonymous

My daughter's about to be 10 my son is 12 and he can sleep by himself but my daughter can't she's been sleeping in my room for a little while but She really needs help sleeping by herself. So I would really like it if I found some comments to help me

Jul 20, 2012
9 year old
by:

Im the 9 year old from the last comment I've been reading some of these and I'm really happy that there are a lot of other people with the same problems as me
But I really need comments to help me

Jul 20, 2012
To the 9 year old
by: Anonymous

HANG IN THERE!!! It really will happen, it is mind over matter. You are in control, don't think that noises/sounds or shadows control how you feel. You control how you feel. SO, take charge of it. Talk to yourself, you can get through the night. Take baby steps, tell yourself to at least try until such and such time, if your still awake then go in your parents room. But you must keep trying. And always remember, there is nothing wrong with you, this is a fear that a lot of children have... we have a scary world out there with some scary news on TV and the radio, its no wonder all you children are afraid. BUT you are bigger than your fear, just keep on trying!! You will conquer your fear.

Jul 24, 2012
i know how they feel
by: Anonymous

I know how she/He feels like i am scared to sleep alone with out somone in my house awake or somone sleeping next to me . i think its beacuse somtimes i have a feeling that is kinda scary and i somtimes dont tell my mom beacuse i think she will call me crazy so i keep it to my self. i would ask your children what they are scared of and try to help them not be scared of it and be sure to tell them that they are not the only ones with this problem i am almost 14 year old girl and i am still scared

Jul 25, 2012
I need help [please]:(
by: Anonymous

I have been sleeping whit my mom & dad since I was a baby and now that I have this urgency to mature and show everyone the I Can but it docent play out that way i just get terrified of the loneliness and the darkness please help.

Jul 26, 2012
to the person above
by: Anonymous

Don't fret it will happen. You will sleep on your own. You are use to sleeping with your parents and you should set small goals to try and conquer. Start by telling yourself that you will stay in your room until midnight. You will try and go to sleep. You can try reading before bed, a pleasant book, not scarey. You can try and repeat a positive quote in your mind. If you believe in God, try repeating a verse from the bible. If you are still awake by midnight then you can go to your parents room and sleep that night. But each night you must set a goal and try it. It will happen, it may take some time but it will happen. Also, try this when you don't have school the next day, summer break/weekends etc... If there is something that you are afraid of then face it, if its a noise turn on the light and look to see what made the noise. If its darkness, then have a flashlight in bed with you or have nightlights. Face the fear, don't let "it" control you. You are bigger than your fears. Good Luck. Keep trying it will happen.

Jul 27, 2012
Sleeping alone
by: Anonymous

I am 12 and I have the same problem last summer and basically last year I slept in my room but now I am scared and when my mom tells me I have to sleep in my bed I panic and start crying I have tried lights and a tv with a movie, and every thing I am independent and really want to sleep alone but I feel like I can't and I try telling myself I can do it but then I can't :( i have good grades and friends but then I get home and start to think about night time and freak out I have to beg my mom to let me sleep in her room and she always eventually gives in because I cry and everything I read these things and am glad I am not the only one but I do really need help!!!!

Jul 28, 2012
i havea 12 1/2 daughter
by: Anonymous

I realize my mistake was letting her sleep with my as a toddler. Now I am paying for it! she is very bright.

Everynight I have to spend minimum of 90 minutes putting her to sleep. For example tonight was 90 minutes, she slept fortwo and a half hours, and now i am awake agsin having to baby her and sit with her. Nothing works. I gave her the dig, i tell her we cant do things she wants to. We are to go to the drivein with her bestfriends family two nights from now. Dont want to reward her by letting us go. Her response then is she doesnt need friends. Im tired of beibg tired because of this. It is like i have a new baby and not a tween!

Taking activities away such as playing favorite game away doent help.

We are to go on vacation to the beach. I have even told her if she cant sleep in her own room she will have to stat with her grandparents.

She gives 100s of reasons?doesnt like her room. The xarpet. The walls need painted. Etc.

Righting this at 400 am. Told her she has to get up at 700am dont care if she is tired. She has made me and the rest of us tired.

Looking for help and an answer,. . . .in Pa.

Jul 28, 2012
hi i need help
by: Australia

i'm 14 i know i am going on camp for school i don't want to go because i am so worried about not getting enough sleep i suffer for migraines and i'm worried that if i don't get sleep at camp i will get a migraine and i can't go home the place is 5 hours away i don't know what to do I'm always not going out because of this i get so depressed i don't know heats wrong with me what do i do

Jul 28, 2012
i need help [please]:( continuation
by: Anonymous

Well today I'm going to try what the blog suggested.I also want to say how badly i felt after fight that derived because of my sleeping
problems. So Yous wanted to say hope it works Thanks(:

Jul 28, 2012
Sleeping with parents at 12
by: Anonymous

I am 12 and I have a big problem with sleeping alone, anytime I am alone in my bed i start to panic and cry. Last summer i switched rooms and beds and slept fine every night and I know this is crazy but I was getting used to this one bed and then my parents re did my room and now I am afraid of this bed and stuff I don't know why but i am. I really really want to sleep alone and prove I can do it but I panic when I am alone, I have read the comments but they are what i have tried but i feel like nothing works PLEASE HELP I feel like i am strange............

Jul 29, 2012
To the numerous blogs above
by: Anonymous

First off, to the parents. I can 100% empathize with you. I know how wearing it is when all you want to do is go to sleep and then you have an anxious child at your bedside, pleading with you. All I can say is, keep trying. We tried so many times various ways to get our child to sleep in her room. We tried things more than once. My daughter was so anxious that I would end up crying for her, I could really feel the sense of anxiety and fear that she was fretting about when she was pleading to sleep in our room. Did we do the wrong thing by letting her sleep in our room, I don't think so. We are her parents, it is our job to help our children feel safe and help them deal with these fears. As we all know, children are all different-even within the same household. There is no recipe to fix this issue. But what I will say is, the kids need lots of love and reassurance. I mean look at our crazy crazy world, its no wonder that they wake up or dream crazy dreams. So, as parents we just need to continue to be supportive, trying various ways to make them feel safe and loved. Yes, it is hard. Especially when we are sooooo tired. But I promise you this, it will end. They will break away at some point and sleep in their own room. They really will and if you have a faith I think its important to help them develop that faith so they do have hope. Good Luck and keep trying I promise it will work. I am the original blogger, my daughter is now 15 and sleeps in her own room. I have an 11yo son who is sleeping on our floor, I know it will end at some point. We just keep trying and praying:)

Jul 31, 2012
Im 12 and still cant sleep on my own what do i do?
by: Anonymous

Hi i am 12 years old and i cant sleep on my own i dont no why? but its not fun to deal with i wanna go to bed but i cant? its a strange feeling.this started happing, in the summer time. untill one day i slept in my parents room for a full 3 days and after that i lost it my mom told me to sleep in your room and i just started crying and getting nervouse untill my mom was like ill sleep with you and i got better so the next day around 5.00 i started getting nervouse so my mom said dont worry honey it always works out! so around 10.00pm i got really i mean really nervouse and so my mom said you aint getting better by me sleepin in there so she said im not sleepin in there after that i strted beggin so hard tht i got to sleep in my parents room!! and my dad said this is it! no more sleepin in here no more! so i dident care about that so i just slept in there and my mom gave me slepin pills and i got knocked out the next day was fine still around 10.00 i was alright but... when my mom said( she was tired and then i lost it again!!! so me and my parents are trying to find out what's really going on so wreally whats's going on???

Aug 01, 2012
I'm 12 years old
by: Anonymous

I'm 12 years old and I do the same thing every night i lay in my bed and wait for my mom to go sleep I used to sleep by myself but I can't now could it be because my dad passed away last year

Aug 01, 2012
To the above comments
by: Anonymous

In regards to the 14yo boy who is doing better, I think you have to just continue to watch the improvement. Its not completely better and yes the kids arent thrilled that they are sleeping alone, but the reality is they are sleeping in their room. Are they still anxious, sure. Its a step process and the more comfortable they get being in their room, alone and able to sleep alone, they will build that confidence. It definitely doesnt happen over night and takes time. But look how far he has come and he will continue to do well. I think sometimes its hard because you feel their angst and want to help them so bad, but what we need to realize at this stage is we are helping them be independent and preparing them for adulthood. Its hard and neverending, but the little steps is what gets you forward. Good luck, he is doing great and will continue to do well. Did he need counseling, I would say No, look at how many children have this very similar issue. And when you look at our world today, its no wonder. Good Luck, I know he is going to do great!
To the 12yo who is struggling, hang in there. Like I said, it really is a day by day situation. Yes, you are definitely anxious and you don't want to sleep in your room, but you can. What you need to do is try and make every day a new beginning, if you fail one night. You try the next. You have to face the fears and keep trying. It will happen.
To the 12yo that lost her Dad last year, first I am so sorry that you would have to endure such pain as losing your parent at such a young age. Yes, you definitely could be struggling with sleep issues because of grief related to your loss. Listen, there is never a time limit on when you need to get "over" the loss of someone so close to you. Let yourself grieve, give yourself time, the sleep issue should not be your worry right now. Reach out to those around you and keep your Dads memories alive. Best wishes, I will say a prayer for you tonight.

Aug 01, 2012
13 year old boy afraid to sleep alone
by: Anonymous

Thankyou for your supportave comments.

Aug 02, 2012
Help..
by: Anonymous

I have the same thing except I can sleep in my own bed it's just it's very close to my parents room and I can't face the window. Im fine at sleeping over at my friends house & Having my friends over but I think it's caused by to many horror movies at a young age. Sarah xx

Aug 02, 2012
^^to above 13yo
by: Anonymous

I think you would be surprised at how many of your friends have similar sleep issues. Don't feel "bad" about yourself for not sleeping in your own room. The great thing is, you really want to and that is a start. You will, you really will. I think you should try with little steps. Try to go to sleep in your own room and give yourself a goal, by such and such time if I don't fall asleep then I will go in my parents room. Keep trying this every single night, and it will happen eventually. It really will, but you must make the effort and try. You have to have the will to do it, so try and keep trying. Good Luck.
And to Sarah, maybe its not a good idea to be watching horror films at this point in your life:)

Aug 03, 2012
OMG ME TOO!
by: VideoGameAddict

I am 11 years old and I have the same problem.I also have Seperation Anxiety. She probably has seperation anxiety too. I am very messed up in the head when it comes to going on trips,going to bed,the doctors,dentist,school,all that.Get her a pet to sleep with her. I sleep with a movie on or a nightlight. Yet I still have problems.I also have auditory hallucinations.The scary thing is,She could be comming down with Schizophrenia. But right now..I'd call it Sleep Insomnia. Good luck :)

Aug 03, 2012
I am scared of getting kidnapped
by: Anonymous

I have a huge problem of sleeping at note cuz I am up stairs with my older brother but he always has his door shut so I feel like I'm alone i really need a soulition I sleep fine at friends but not at home I am 11 and my parents think I am faking all this so they don't let me sleep with them so I ball ball
and ball everynite scared to sleep a lone

Aug 05, 2012
oldest child can't sleep
by: Parent in PA

Our son has the same issues I've been reading about in these posts. He's 13, our oldest, and he's a very popular, friendly, spirited kid. But he either can't sleep alone, or needs to know that someone is still awake in the living room while he's falling asleep (which means that either me or my wife have often needed to stay awake in the living room while he keeps periodically calling down to us to say good night - and reassuring himself that someone in the house is still awake). His younger sister has no problem falling asleep by herself in her room. Although their personalities have almost always been this way, I also wonder if him being the oldest child is a factor in any way (and perhaps we over the years put up with this more from him being the oldest than we have or would have from his younger sibling). Intersted to know if other are expereincing this more with an oldest child than younger ones. Thanks.

Aug 05, 2012
regarding the oldest child
by: Anonymous

My daughter is the oldest child and definitely had the most angst about sleeping alone. However, my son now has issues at 11. The difference is my son does not have the level of anxiety that my daughter had when she was having issues. It may be oldest child. I think my son is more "conditioned" because his older sister had issues and that is what he saw and knew. So, now my daughter is fine and we are dealing with our son!

Aug 06, 2012
My daughter can't sleep alone she is 10!
by: Anonymous

My 10 yr old has the same problem is it mental issues help me! You can see the fear in her eyes when I tell her to sleep alone :( she sometimes starts screaming and crying her eyes out but eventually falls asleep but she wakes up ever time at like 3 in morning. She had no problem sharing a room with her sister but then we moved and now she can't. Maybe it's scary movies or something but she can't no matter what. Ive tried dream nets crosses and all kinds of stuff to hang over the bed but IT DOESN'T WORK! I don't know what to do.

Aug 06, 2012
i can't sleep help
by: james

i need help with my sleeping. it maybe a nightmare or even scary movies. i need help by my dad or mum slepping with my or even my sister to sleep with me so i am okay. my cousins sometimes force me to see scary things so i need help.

Aug 07, 2012
to James
by: Anonymous

James- First off, you should know that there are so many kids from real young to 17 years old that have sleep issues. So, don't fret and don't feel like there is ever something "wrong" with you. There is nothing wrong. You have a fear, it happens to be when its time to unwind, close your eyes and fall aleep. A lot of kids have this same fear, you just don't know it because no one talks about it. Keep trying, it is a fear and you will eventually overcome this fear. But in order for you to conquer the fear, you have to continue to try. Set limits for yourself, that by such and such time you will try and fall asleep. If you can't then you sleep with Mom or Sis. But you have to keep trying, that is key. You cannot give in to the fear. You will overcome it. I promise you. Hang in there!

Aug 08, 2012
my daughter is 12 and is petrefide to sleep
by: tracy ulibarri

this has been going on for the last 2 yr she went to sleeping in her room to sleeping on the couch and now in my bed, but when she sleep in bed with me in bed my husband sleeps on the couch she dosent like sleeping next to any windows i dont know what to do i have tried everything including sleeping in bed with her but the strain on my marriage is wairing i would do anything for my daughter could u please help me.by yhr way my daughter is 13.

Aug 08, 2012
to above comment
by: Anonymous

If your daughters afraid of the windows then she must be feeling unsafe. First off, I would try and make her environment as safe as possible. If you can move her bed away from any windows and ask her where it would feel safest to her. Then once the room is arranged in a way that she feels "safe" have her go over with you what makes her feel "safe". Show her that you will lock all the doors and windows, keep a night light on, give her a bell or something she can sleep with in bed that she feels she could make noise if she got scared. I think 13 years old is just about the age when they are really wanting to sleep in their own room but they are consumed with fear. So,try and figure out what exactly makes her afraid and then try and conquer that fear. If she hears noises, try and figure out what the noise is so she can realize that it is nothing to be afraid of. I hope that helps. It is very straining on a couple, I know. But it will get better. The parents have to keep trying and keep being patient just like the kids. Sometimes it was just easier to let our daughter sleep in our room because we were tired. You do what you can and keep trying. The key is keep trying and keep trying. It will happen.

Aug 13, 2012
My daughter cannot sleep alone.....
by: MD

Anonymous, I'm not so sure I agree with you. Sleep with your mom or sis? Sis okay, but what if mom is a working mom? What if mom is married? While some people espouse the philosophy of children in the marital bed or bedroom, this is seldom a good idea for a marriage. I know it takes patience and perseverance when a child has an anxiety disorder, and yes, this fear is an anxiety disorder. Anxieties are normal, but when they interfere with a lifestyle (the child and the parents) it is time to address the situation professionally. Grow out of it? Usually, but that can take years. The exact cause of anxiety disorders is unknown; but anxiety disorders are not the result of personal weakness, a character flaw, or poor upbringing.

I think a visit with a physician is the first step that should be undertaken to rule out any physical cause. If there is no physical cause, move onto emotional ones. There is a multitude of approaches that can be undertaken, such as medication, psychotherapy, cognitive-behavioral therapy or relaxation therapy. Support groups are also a consideration.

Supportive care by the parents and a professional staff may be just what the doctor ordered.

Aug 14, 2012
to the most recent entry-MD
by: Anonymous

I agree there are a few instances that intervention with a counselor or physician may be warranted. But they are few. As you can see from this blog, this is an issue that many children deal with and there is definitely not "one" answer. I absolutely disagree that trying medication is an answer. First off, these children are in the midst of growing and developing hormones. They absolutely do not need medication to disrupt this natural process. Is it anxiety, absolutely. Do we all have some level of anxiety, absolutely. This is one way that the children start to learn to cope with the anxieties they may face. There are always outliers, so sure there a few that do need medical intervention. But for the most part, its pure patience and reassurance with a lot of help from the parents. You probably have your own issues with your own child or one of your clients, why else would you have googled this issue and found this blog?

Aug 14, 2012
similar problem
by: Anonymous

I am 12 and I have a similar problem but i sleep with my 7 year old sister and am afraid someone is in our house at night and when i hear a noise i freak out and have to go look around the house and sometimes i think noise came from my moms room so i go and check on her.I really would like to stop this and have a good nights sleep. Any suggestions?

Aug 15, 2012
I'm still so scared!!
by: Anonymous

Hey guys, I'm almost 17 now and I struggle to sleep at night the earliest I probably fall asleep would be around 3.30 in the morning, there fore I'm restless the whole next day at tafe, I slept with my mother in her bed every single night since I was 4 till about 14. I don't sleep with her anymore, but I always sleep with the light on and my door locked shut and also have curtains across my mirror. I don't get in my bed till my mum goes to bed. I lay in my bed thinking about someone in the house trying to hurt me, I usually hide under my pillow and blanket cause I'm to scared to open my eyes I hold my ears closed so I can't hear anything at all and sometimes I cry because Im to scared to shut my eyes. I just wish I could sleep, as it's making me sick, I use to think that it was just my horrible past, or death of close friends and family members that is causing this, but now I just think I'm going crazy because I'm so paranoid . Please help me, anyone or anything will be appreciated!!!!!!

Aug 15, 2012
To the 17 year old above
by: Anonymous

Im not sure what type of things you have to deal with in the past, but for sure you would most definitely benefit from some counseling. If money is an issue and you cannot affort a counselor, check into catholic charities, they have qualified counselors at no fee or minimal fee based on a sliding scale. It really never hurts to talk things out, esp. if its a professional because they have some really good tips that will help you. In regards to hiding under your pillow,think about what it is your afraid of, face that fear. Empower yourself by taking self defense classes if you can. Try and get to a place where you feel safe with yourself and any situation may face. I really do think you would really benefit with a counselor. I hope this helps.

Aug 15, 2012
To above comment.
by: Anonymous

I do boxing classes and kick boxing classes, and I have been ever since I was 8 I have no problem in the defense area, I'm afraid of the dark, and have seen a lot of deaths of very close people to me, that I guess I blamed myself for the cause, when deep down I know it's not my fault, but I think because I blame myself I worry that there spirits are coming after me. I have anxiety issues and a very bad paranoia problem, I worry that I'm the only one with this problem, I think I'm a freak, and my family laugh at me, which discourages me' I've been very bad where I'd had an anxiety attack, which led to an Athsma attack, which caused me to end up in hospital, that scared me very much.
I go to church every Sunday and talk to the paster, he gives my mind peace, until I go to sleep! I will try couselling, & let you know how it works out, thankyou very much !

Aug 15, 2012
I know how it feels, i'm 13 and can't sleep alone
by: Hannah

Hi everyone, I'm a 13 year old girl and I just wanted to share MY own story, i have had problems with sleeping my whole life, i have always been sleeping in my parents bed, and i just hate doing it, i don't know really WHY i do it? some nights i'm scared, and some nights i just don't want to sleep alone, and if my mum says something like "no, go to your bed and sleep alone" i starts to cry like a little baby... i feel so bad about my self and i just wants this to end, i am tierd all the days, in school, i just hate it....

And tonight, i just couldn't sleep, i walked in to my mothers room, saying "mum, i can't sleep" and she was like "what am i gonna do?" and i said "i don't know" and started to cry... she said "try a little bit", and so i took my phone and googled "i sleep in my parents bed" and found THIS, and i'm kinda' glad that there is people with the same problems as me... i'm laying here now, in my bed, all alone, and crying, i think my mother is slepping and i have no idea what to do, i don't wanna make her angry..

lots of love, hannah.

Aug 16, 2012
To the 17yo and the above 13yo
by: Anonymous

First to the 17yo who takes kickboxing, that is awesome! Im sure you feel empowered that you can defend yourself. It sounds like, its more your own thoughts that are disturbing you. I really think by talking it out with a counselor then you can work through those thoughts. You can discover why the darkness provokes the fear, why you think its "your fault" and work through it. I know you can, I really do think you will conquer this issue. You may have anxiety but keep in mind everyone has anxiety, you just need some help in how to deal with the anxiety so it doesnt overwhelm you. Sometimes if you belong to a big church, they have counselors at the church who can help. Start there if you can but make sure you are comfortable with whoever the counselor is so that you are honest and able to express yourself freely. Good Luck!

To the 13yo who is frustrated above with sleeping in her Moms room. I can feel your angst. I know your frustated and your feelings are so real to you, but you will get through this issue. Look at all the kids who responded to this blog. There are sooooo many children that have this same issue. So first off, know that there is nothing wrong with you. Yes you get anxious, you cry and you hate sleeping alone, but you will get through it. Once again, if you read through the blogs, try and try each night to calm yourself, face the fear- if you hear a noise get out of bed and find it, see what it is that makes the noise. If you need light, bring a flashlight to bed. What makes you feel safe? Give yourself a timeline, you have to keep trying-each night, start out in your own bed-try and fall asleep by such and such time, if you cant then talk to your mom. But you must keep trying because it will happen, its just a matter of time. Hang in there:)

Aug 17, 2012
trouble sleeping
by: Anonymous

I have worries when i go to bed... Im 13. I dont worry about sleeping alone i worry more that i wont sleep or that i wont get enough hours sleep.... I have a birhday party coming up and it is two days before school. Im worried i wont sleep and it will muck up my routine im setting for school (bed at 9.45 wake up at 7) it takes me about 2-3 hours to fall asleep... What shall i do? I want to go but im worried!! Help????

Aug 20, 2012
im.scared
by: Anonymous

I am also 12 and I am terrified of sleeping alone … my parents force me to go to bed alone in my room and I really am terrified... they said if I go down there I loose HALF my alowence Money I NEED HELP

Aug 27, 2012
me and my brother and cousin
by: Anonymous

im 10 and my 4 year old brother and my 4 year old cousin is a girl and my brother slept alone since he was about 3 and my girl cousin when she was around 2-3 i never had any problems.

Aug 29, 2012
IM MAD
by: Anonymous

hi im 10 going on 11 next month im also going into grade 6 next month. im very upset that i sleep in my parents room at almost 11 😭. sometimes i cry about it. 😭 i sleep on 2 blankets under me a pillow under my head and a blanket to cover me. what im also upset about is my parents dont like to keep my like PERSONAL life PERSONAL(mostly my mom) she has told some of my dance friends moms and some of my school friends moms and has told strangers we dont know. and then at home my dad keeps saying im going to throw you in your room and lock you in there on the day school starts and we are not letting you have this oppurtunity again i understand that i shouldnt be sleeping there but still it scares me sometimes if he means it now i go to bed aroun 9:45 10:00 but cant fall asleep till like 11 once i went to bed at 9 and didnt fall asleep till 1 am. im very worried cause i did this around Christmas when i was 8 and my parents got me out at age 9 but you know how by bribing me my mom bought me tickets to my favourite band but i had to sleep in my room for a week so i tried i did it i got used to it and i didnt want to leave because it was soooooo comfy but eventually when i was 10 in lime January 2012 i started to cry around 11 cause my parents were going to bed and i was afraid of tbe dark so i definitley couldnt then, then after that they havent card about my health or ecucation please help me and im putting this out there im a dancer and its not good to be sleepin on a floor this year im doing a lot of competition and lime 10/12 hours of dance a week every week. and my dark issue how it got me here for the second time i do have a nightlight i have no idea whatto do and i dont feel safe sleeping in the dark without my parents,
HELP PLZ or im going to fail in school and have to quit dance and dance is my life just like other things are peoples lifes.

Aug 30, 2012
Wow! I'm not the only one.
by: Cassidy

Hi I'm cassie and i am turning 12 this february.(sorry if i spelt it wrong). Its scary to me how lots of other people go through this i thought i was the only one. And because of that i thought i was weird, or had something wrong with me.
In fact two days ago i was with my mom (my parents are in a divorce) and i couldn't go to sleep until she slept there with me. I cried to my mom telling her everything that was wrong or i didn't like in my life. eg. moving school's, fighting, my pet just died, my moms moving to Toronto and how i live a hour-hour and a half away from her. and blah blah blah. but my mom was really worried about me so when i left for my dads house i called her when it was time for bed already worrying about bed when she told me relax thing of my favorite things in life and many more things that seamed to work i was crying though.
the point is i am going into grade six and all the stress in my life has fell in my sleeping. I am now going to a special person who can help fix this in my life. Thank you to the people who have read this theres a lot of things i had to get of my mind.Cassie

Aug 31, 2012
Dear Cassie and the 15yo above
by: Anonymous

HANG IN THERE!! Cassie you have a lot of change going on in your life and that can be very stressful and overwhelming, so just try and organize your thoughts thinking about what makes you happy and all those positive things, try this before bedtime, kind of like a warm up to bed. Then when you are lying in your bed, try and say something over and over in your head, something positive. "I am smart, I am beautiful, I can do this" Hey, I know it sounnds silly but who cares, no one can hear what your thinking. By repeating it, over and over its just going to send positive messages to your brain and the repetitiveness will make you sleepy. Try it. But don't be hard on yourself when someone goes through a lot of change its not easy it takes time to adjust, be you will adjust. Stay positive:)
To the 15yo, Im sure it was the horror show that provoked those scarey thoughts to return. I will tell you, my 15yo still loves to sleep on the floor in my room, if she was given a choice it would certainly be that she would sleep in my room. I don't let her except on extremely special circumstances because she has come such a long way in sleeping in her own bed/room. Now she is at the point where she CAN sleep in her room alone, she just doesnt like it. Sometimes that is how life is, we have to adjust. It sounds like you can sleep in your room, you are just at the point where you need to avoid horror shows and replace the scarey thoughts, with positive thoughts, like I told Cassie above. Good Luck, I know you will do it.

Sep 03, 2012
I can't sleep alone
by: Anonymous

I have the same problem. I am 13 and I started being able to sleep on my own but then every once in a while I would get really scared of being alone and being the only one up and nothing can help me but having my mom or dad lie with me. Sometimes I just cant fall asleep because I have an overactive mind and then I need someone to lie with me to calm me down. It has been happening more frequently and I tried melatonin but that night was the worst in a while. I have tried distracting myself but that ust keeps me up later and tends to make it worse. A lot of the time I wish I could go downstairs and watch TV but I don't because I feel wierd doing that. I feel bad because my parents never really get to spend time together so i really want to be able to sleep alone so I am not a problem. I also have really bad anxiety and I am getting better from that and I also get really stressed so I don't know if it is from that. If anyone has any suggestions to help me please let me know.

Sep 03, 2012
I can't sleep without my lights
by: Little Ge

I am only 12 (not long had my birthday) I am so frightened of the dark... I am OK if I have my dog with me but he never comes into my room! I usually get tucked in before going to sleep and my mum thinks I am getting to old to do this... I then usually fall to sleep and then my mother turns off my lights. I am wanting to go to bed after my mother and not be scared..... PLEASE HELP AND GIVE ME TIPS ON HOW TO SLEEP AL0NE

Little Ge

Sep 05, 2012
to the mom above
by: Anonymous

I have been in the same boat. I will tell you that we gave in many times, we had to. We would try certain things and they wouldnt work and then we were worried she wasnt getting the sleep she needed so we would let her sleep in our room on the floor or with her little brother. My daugter too, has no problem staying alone in our house during the day/eve for short spurts, she can do sleepovers at other homes no problem and have friends sleep over our house. But when push came to shove at night, she had a true anxiety about sleeping alone. She is now almost 15 and sleeps in her own bed, there was no magic. I even had my husband and I go to a counselor to help her, I didnt want to take her because I didnt want her to feel that there was something "wrong" with her. Anyway, the counseling was helpful but really it was just my daughter maturing and time that helped her the most. Even now if she is given the choice, she would much rather sleep in our room on the floor then her own bed. We don't let her because the anxiety she once experienced has lessened. Hope this helps.

Sep 05, 2012
yep
by: Anonymous

I understand her problem because I have the same one.I am 11 and I'm all alone in my bed at 12a.m. I am so used to having someone next to me when I sleep. But now that I have my own room, its pretty scary. So, if I were you I would let her have a t.v in her room I have one in mine and it helps a whole lot

Sep 11, 2012
My daughter cannot sleep alone.
by: Anonymous

When i googled this i was so relieved to find that my daughter and us as parents are not alone . she has been afraid of sleeping alone for over a year now , and like another lady said , it has been since she watched paranormal activity (unknown to m,e , at a friends hse)Her imagination has run riot, and she thinks and believes every little sound she hears is something or someone terrible,about to get her. She hates being alone upstairs, hates being in the bath or shower if no one is upstairs, and certainly hates being the only one awake in the house. Her fears are real to her and no matter how much i try to reassure her and give logical explanations for the noises etc she still has these fears. She is a bright ,talented popular 14 year old and it breaks my heart to see her cry when i say "just try",she wants to but just can't.My husband works away alot so she sleeps with me , and when he's home she sleeps on our floor. I live in hope having read some of these stories that she will grow out of it ,because i know she certainly doesn't want to feel this way, until then i will continue to give up my space in the bed as she pinches it all when she's asleep !!

Sep 12, 2012
I am 13 and know your pain
by: Anonymous

I have been researching this for a while now because i have slep in my parents bed forever now. At my moms its once a week because thats all shell allow me but at my dads whos a firefighter so when he is home i always sleep in his bed and i keep telling myself and they keep telling me that ill grow out of it but i dont think i will. I hope i will once well i Start my . because then ill feel too ackward or something i dont know i just want to stop it because im in high school now n im probably the only one that still sleeps in their parents bed especially that often. Someone plez help.

Sep 12, 2012
To the 13yo above
by: Anonymous

I absolutely guarantee you that there are other kids in high school sleeping in their parents room. You are definitely not alone. My soon to be 15yo wanted to sleep on the floor in our room just last night. We didn't let her because she has been doing well sleeping in her own room, so we insisted she go in her own room. BUT if she is given the option she would definitely choose our room. There is nothing wrong with you. As you can see from this blog, this is a very very prevalant issue, that touches many many people. It is never talked about therefore everyone feels its a problem with themselves. However, this blog assures you that this is an issue with many kids, and guess what- you will definitely get past it. It will happen, you will start trying to stay in your own room and eventually it will be comfortable to you and the rest is history. So, hang in there, keep trying and don't lose hope, you will do this it is just a matter of time and patience. Keep trying and be persistent. GOOD LUCK!

Sep 15, 2012
I used to be the same way
by: Anonymous

Hi, i just wanted to say i am 14, and i have just started sleeping in my own room. I used to sleep in my dad and stepmoms room in the floor, but i just recently (last night) slept in my own room. I turned on a little light, watched some tv, and fell asleep with my dog. Thats the only way i will sleep in my room is if my dog is with me. I know your problem will get better, she is just over-thinking it like i did, and until last night i didnt realize how relaxing it is to have your own room.

Sep 16, 2012
I think
by: Anonymous

I am 15 now, I am fully able to sleep on my own but some days me and my 6 year old sister will demand a bed time story and sleep in the same bed as my mother. I used to suffer from anxiety but now it is simply a comfort thing- her bed is somehow far more comfortable than mine! I wouldn't worry about what age your child is, eventually they will want independence and overcome any anxiety.

Sep 16, 2012
Can't get used to sleeping alone.
by: Anonymous

Hi, i just turned 17 in April. From when I was little and up till this yr, May, I have been sleeping with my grandmother next to me since I share a room with her.So basically I've been sleeping next to her for 17years. But recently in May, she moved to my aunt's house to take care of my grandfather who has a stroke and she has to stay there for quite a long time. Up until now, I have problems with sleeping alone. I get panic attacks and an over active imagination when I try to fall asleep. Like I would hear little sounds outside and i will panic. Usually, I sleep with the door closed and the lights on. But 4 months ago and up till now, I couldn't take it so now I've been sleeping in my parents' room,on the floor. This is a really big problem especially since im already a teen. I really do not know what to do and I was relieved when I found this blog.

Sep 21, 2012
your 13 year old daughter
by: Anonymous

i think that its just strange your daughter wont fall fall asleep by herself. i think that u should tell her to think of good things if she has bad thoughts. i also suggest u sit her down and have a talk with her you should say something like: "you are a teenager now stop being such a baby and be mature." then send to her room and lock her there like a princess until she falls asleep. then every day sneak in her room and give her some prison food. that will teach your little brat for a child.trust my advice I'm in the same situation.
JK dont do that i have no idea what I'm talking about. you should show your daughter that you understand and care.Be nice and good luck!

Sep 24, 2012
Been there done that
by: Anonymous

Hi I'm
Nicole and I'm 13 years old. Believe it or not but I only just started sleeping in my room about a few days. Let me just say when I was little I had bad dreams and issues an was very scared and whenever I put my head down on the pillow I thought of the worst thing possible. Have you tryed asking her how she would like her room. For example my mum just got me a comfy three quarter bed which means basically double bed and now I type I'm laying in it alone. I kinder just grew out of the whole fact of being scared you can also ask bet what makes her safe?? I'm Wiccan and I have my sign right above my head I feel safe :). Have you also tryed her sleeping in her room with the light on and you watching TV outside her room and she can be playing with her iPod or laptop until she's so tired she doesn't care. That's how I do it I wait till I really tired and then I close my eyes with the TV on. Last thing final ha she got a younger or older sister or brother she can sleep with I slept with my 17 year old brother for like 10 years because i was scared. Anyway good luck and show your daughter what I'm gonna say right now: don't worry nothing will happen to you I was exactly like you and I'm 13 aswell please you can do it.

Sep 26, 2012
Scared of the Dark
by: Anonymous

When I was little, I was scared of the dark. I shared a room with my brother for the first 13 years of my life. He is actually 6 years younger than me. Even though he was on the bottom bunk, I still felt scared. I would climb onto the foot of his bed to fall asleep.

When we moved, I got my own room. I enjoyed being in my space in the day time but as soon as it got dark, I would find my way to my brother's room. I never slept with the lights off, i was terrified of the dark but if when I slept with him or even my mother, I felt safe. I used to have bad dreams sometimes and at times I had bad thoughts. This didn't happen every night but even on those peaceful nights, I could only sleep with someone with me. I didn't sleep in my room alone until I had my daughter at 21. It felt as if my fear left me when I had my child. I thought that I conquered it but I was wrong. I was fine because my daughter was with me.

I realized that my fear hadn't left when she spent the weekend with her father and his family. I was alone again. I was scared, I don't think I got any sleep that night. When she and her father came home, I was ashamed. I was a grown woman still scared to sleep alone. At that moment, I had to grow up. I told myself that there was nothing to be scared of. The next time I was left in the house alone, I tried to think of happy things it took some time but I finally got to a point where I am fine sleeping alone.

Now, I am 32 years old and I feel that my daughter is suffering through what I did as a child. All I can do is be patient and pray that she gets through just as I did.

Sep 28, 2012
i can't sleep either
by: Anonymous

Hi guys of this conversation, i'm 12 and I have been reaserching this alot. I am pretty mature for my age because i'm older and have always had a "mother like" feeling towards my younger siblings because my parents work a lot. I am turning 13 next year and am really scared of sleeping. At first I thought this was some sort of insomnia because of how much i'd just stay up 'making a plan' of an excuse i would tell my mom about how I could somehow convince her to let me sleep with her. A week ago I went on a school camping trip and was genuinly really scared. I panicked all the way until it came. The thing you guys need to do is not to be firm, working to get out of it is best: Just like this, 1st day: lay next to her in bed, 2nd day: stay up until she falls asleep, 3rd day: etc. mean it took me a long time to get comfortoable sleeping without being near anyone. I still ahve this problem but i haven't had to see a doctor yet so i think its just physcologiccal so don't send your kid to one becasue they'll just get scared that there is something wrong with them

Sep 30, 2012
I am 10
by: Emily

Hi I am ten and I am afraid to be alone at night and in the morning I don't know why but I can go to my friends house or any thing 😪I wish I could but I like it when they come over but I can't do that on a school night . If I'm really tired I will go to bed any comments!!!!!!!!😱

Oct 02, 2012
Hopeful
by: Anonymous

Us too she 14 teen. We have also done everything we can ,but she is in our bedroom. I wish I could help her . I know she does not like it too.

Oct 02, 2012
to the above comments
by: Anonymous

I do think that 14-15 is about the age you will see your child attempting to sleep on their own,they want to as much as you want them to. There is always hope and I am confident your 14yo will soon be sleeping alone in their own room. Keep trying and keep supporting them, remember the child really wants to do this just as much as you want them to.

Oct 11, 2012
Cannot sleep alone- 13yrs
by: Anonymous

My husband and I just had a huge fight because my daughter cannot sleep alone. When I used to sleep with my daughter he told me that we should go our separate ways because he needs a wife. I had to teach my child to sleep but she is still having difficulties. Every time she cannot sleep, he expects me to go sleep with her. I just feel that I am being shoveled between them when it suits them. Please help with some advice!!!!!!!!

Oct 12, 2012
Getting to sleep seems to be the challenge
by: Kristi

It certainly is nice reading all your posts. I too am glad I am not alone. I am a parent of a 9 year old girl who will be 10 in Dec. This is a new situation for us as we have never had to deal with this before. My 9 year old shares a room with her 6 year old sister. They have always shared a room together, so they're not alone. My 6 year old sleeps like a dream! My 9 year old, once she is asleep is good (knock on wood!) but her trouble is getting to sleep. She's concerned that she's going to be the only one awake at night while the rest of us are sleeping. She'll focus on the time on her alarm clock and become very anxious that she hadn't fallen asleep by a certain time and that she'll not be able to focus in school the next day. I have turned her clock around so she can't see it and told her not to worry about the time and just to relax and be calm in her bed as that is restful for her body as well. I'm just wondering what I can do to help her feel more settled in going to sleep and not be so anxious keeping herself up worrying that she'll be the last one asleep. Any input is greatly appreciated!! Thanks for reading this!

Oct 12, 2012
My son is 11 years old and still wants to sleep with mom!
by: Need Help

It's my fault for allowing my son to sleep with me since he was a baby. My younger brother use to sleep with my parents till he reached high school. My son never slept in a crib before. I wish I never started the trend. He has slept in his room a couple of times by himself when he was around 8 years old and off and on through his growth. Last night he wanted me to sleep with him, and I said "I can't because your to big." He said. "Mom you don't care about me." I had separated blanket, but I lay there until he went to sleep. How can I stop it for good? He is entering the preteen about to be 11 years old and interested in girls. I asked him what does he want from a girl and what does it mean to date? He said, "He just wanted to hold their hands and nothing else." He is only allowed to watch G movie and some PG depends, but not PG-13 and above. He normally watch Disney channel and nothing elses because he doesn't like violence. He is learning about girls because going to school. What can I say to my son to help him understand mom can't sleep with you and it doesn't mean she doesn't love you? I have tried telling him that cops will not be happy if you sleep with your mother. Also that he wouldn't be able to sleep at his friend's house if he can't sleep by himself. I have done walkin talkin when he was younger, but didn't work. Anyone else have advice that I can use?

Oct 12, 2012
To the above comments
by: Anonymous

First off, to the person who posted-Loser, and YOLO. Well, most likely the reason you are on this site is because you have the issues yourself. So, be kind not critical....

To the others- it really really does get better. I feel for the lady who is being pulled, it certainly does wear on your relationship. But it really is a one day at a time. I remember dreading bedtime because of the anxiety that my daughter, then myself and my husband. There were many nights where we lost it, yelling and screaming, tears. Its not easy but over time it really will get better. We just kept trying and trying and trying. Finally, mostly due to her growing up and being a teen, she became stronger. She still doesnt like sleeping alone, but she will do it. The anxiety level is nothing near what it was when she was younger. I just have to be very firm with her now if she requests to sleep in our room on the floor. I mostly will not let her. Sometimes, I still give in. But for the most part, she is doing excellent. Our son, he developed the habit of coming in our room I think mostly because he saw his sister doing this all the time. Our son is 11 now, he starts in his own bed but 50% of the time will come in our room and I leave a sleeping bag on the floor next to my bed. I try not to make it too comfortable for them so they desire to be in their own comfy beds.

GOOD LUCK!! it will happen, it really will:)

Oct 16, 2012
Channel 4 - New Bedtime Programme To The Rescue!
by: Jacqueline

I hope you don’t mind me messaging you guys. I'm a Producer at Channel 4 and would really like to speak to you about the bedtime troubles you are having with your child.

We are currently developing a programme that covers the ‘bedtime battles’ that occur that cause sleeplessness and ways to combat it.

We have some of the best Child Psychologists /Sleep Experts in the UK working on this with us and we would love to hear your story with a view to potentially getting you on the show, receiving one-to-one expert advice on how to solve these issues.

If you wouldn't mind giving me a quick call on 020 7438 1851 that would be much appreciated.

Many thanks,

Jacqueline
jacqueline. paul at twofour. co. uk

Oct 22, 2012
Prayer
by: Anonymous

When my little brother would wake up screaming in his bed I would be the first one to his room. He had alot of bad dreams and said there was an evil clown in his room. What I did is I prayed over him as he fell asleep and I would pray over his room after he was asleep. I even casted out the evil clown. I never saw it or what ever but why not right? So I did this for about a week and everynight he slept soundly... I still pray after wards but not as often as before. Just have her say a prayer ever night. Bless her bed the doors walls windows. It should help... Just pray Jesus peace over her

Oct 23, 2012
Don't worry about it
by: Anonymous

I'm 17 now, and I was the same way when I was younger. It was terrible. But don't worry, she'll grow out of it. Does sleeping with the light on help her at all? That was probably the most crucial part of growing out of it for me. It was a gradual process of using the light, as well as every now and then my parents' company, as a crutch, until it tapered off into not needed either to sleep comfortably. So, I say, don't worry about it, she'll definitely grow out of it. But if she doesn't grow out of it almost completely by the time she's 15, then I would recommend that she see a therapist, not because she's crazy, but bexause they might be able to help her find out what's causing her anxiety, as well as how to deal with it.

Nov 01, 2012
I worried i will not grow out of it
by: Anonymous

I have the same problem at the age of 11. i think it would help to have a TV in my room (got the idea from an earlier post), but how can sort it out, there is no way i will get a tv in my room. HELP!!!!

Nov 01, 2012
I'm 13 and sometimes have a problem simiar
by: Anonymous

Its reassuring to know I'm not alone. But my slightly different problem is, I CAN sleep alone and I'm able, but I have bad dreams about getting killed a lot and it's very frightening the dreams have been slowly ending,but I still feel as if I sleep better in my parent's room. I don't feel as comfortable in my room and in my room I feel a lot more alone and cold. I just would much rather sleep in their room rather than mine for strange reasons.

Nov 04, 2012
My daughter just can't fall asleep
by: Anonymous

We are going on week four and when I ask why she can't really tell me. I have even slept with her and that does not help. She gets good grades and has lots of friends. I can't pin point the problem. But her not sleeping is stressing the rest of the family and then she feels bad about that. It could be 1pm and she will start talking about how she is worrying about not sleeping. Any suggestions just to help her fall asleep?

Nov 07, 2012
I used to be like this
by: Anonymous

I could never sleep as a kid. Ever. It was horrible, I had to stay in my parents room. But I grew out of it. It's all mental. I told myself "I WILL sleep in my own room tonight". Try putting a t.v on mute, or letting the hallway light on with their door open. Eventually they'll be able to sleep without needing these.
I remember when I was quite little I had nightmares about slugs. My mum said salt kills slugs and put salt on the corners of my bed. I didn't have those dreams anymore.
It's all mentality with them and part of growing up. If its nightmares try asking what they're about, and 'get rid of them' by doing a silly ritual (e.g salt to kill slugs) with the kids. Might help & I wish you all the best of luck.

Nov 12, 2012
make the room enjoyable
by: Anonymous

I turned 13 in september and i still can't sleep alone. My mom will sometimes sit by my bed for hours waiting for me to go to sleep. Some nights i will only get 3 or 4 hours of sleep because of crying all night. Recently i have decorated my room with posters and beautiful wall hangings. i realized that my room felt so white that i got lonely in it. ever since i did that i could sleep by myself. Even painting the room might help. sleep can really effect your daily life and it is important that people get enough of it.

Nov 17, 2012
I Know Her Pain
by: Anonymous

I slept with my mother until I was nine. I am now 12 and sleep alone just fine, except, I have to sleep with a special stuffed animal, or I cannot sleep. If it will help, let her pick out a special stuffed animal and tell her, it's OK to sleep with one. I told someone and was made fun of, but that has died down now, and nobody cares. And also, if she has any siblings, but she doesn't share a room, they could sleep in her room with her, or she could sleep in their room. I wasn't able to sleep alone, because I was scared, only someone who slept in the same room would comfort me. I used to share a room with my little sister, but now I have my own room and that has not been an issue.

Nov 26, 2012
I used to be like your daughter....
by: Anonymous

I am a 12 year old girl and I used to not be able to sleep on my own either and my parents didn't know what to do. I would be so nervous about things the night before and I couldn't sleep and so I would sleep on the floor of my parents room. But then they made me stop and it was sooooooo hard for me!!! So they gave me sleeping pills which REALLY helped! But now I can sleep perfectly on my own, which is great:) All you are doing by letting her sleep with you is hurting her. So if you want to help your daughter, don't let her do this anymore!

Nov 27, 2012
happn to my bff
by: Anonymous

she couldn't sleepover or in room! she got over it by sleeping with a stuffed toy or turning the ligh on in her room!

Nov 28, 2012
I need to sleep alone I'm scared
by: Anonymous

I love my parent but I have to let go .Each night I get nervous and can't even be in my room alone .I climb to my parents bed each night with hope of confort( sudently I feel safe) please help me understand this obstacle. :(

Dec 03, 2012
i have the same problem
by: selena

I have the same problem.It is scary at night by my self. My mom says that she wants her room safe and clean what does she mean by safe.
I am 10

Dec 05, 2012
Im twelve and cant sleep on my own.....
by: Anonymous

I am twelve and I myslef cant sleep at night without going into my mummy's room and begging for her to let me sleep in her room. I share a room with my sister and I always have to turn the t.v on and watch Puss In Boots if my mummy says no. I cat even sleep with my sister in the room! And to make things worse she is getting her own room and so am I and whenever it is mentioned that I am getting my own room I instantly feel queasy and rather sick.
What do I do!? :(

Dec 06, 2012
I was that
by: Anonymous

I just wanted to say that I used to be that daughter, or son :) At 13 I used to be terrified of sleeping alone. I used to cry like a baby and absolutely freak out, I would start shaking and hiperventilating. I was terrified. I ended up sleeping on my parents floor all the time. When I woke up I was, again, terrified that noone else was awake in the house.
My parents then decided they had enough and let the family dog sleep with me and put in a night light.
It took time, but Now I am perfectly fine at sleeping and sleep with no night light.

Dec 06, 2012
thanks, guys!!!
by: Amy

Thanks, you guys have made me sort myself out, i think talking to you it make me realize how to sort
this out, bye!!!

Dec 16, 2012
Advice
by: Anonymous

I'm a parent too and I have a 11 year old boy and he is phenomenal in school and has all A's. Tell your daughter when you get up in the morning that it's mind over matter And to be confident. Sometimes My son is hyped alot on Sunday use a calm medicine to calm her down. My son doesn't complain when my TV is on and lights but when they go off he gets anxiety in his brain and cries and tells me he can't sleep then I tell him you can do anything you want you know. Another thing he goes to sleep to is when I start to snore cause it makes him know I'm there I guess

Dec 16, 2012
Its no wonder kids have trouble sleeping
by: Anonymous

In light of the terrible tragedy this past week in CT. its really no wonder that our kids are afraid to go to bed at night. There is only ONE HOPE, its in GOD above, and until we find that peace in him we will continue to have anxiety and fear. Pray to God and ask him to open your eyes and show you his word. Then open the bible and find a passage that the Lord is speaking to you. The lord always hears your prayer, always.... Never lose hope, for he is always always with you. This world may be crazy and scarey but the Lord in Heaven loves you more than anyone has ever loved you. Open up to God and he will show you.

Dec 18, 2012
Help!!!!!
by: Anonymous

HELP ME!!!!! I am 13 and i am so scared to go to bed myself.. i all ways need someone with me.
My Routine!
.My mum sleeps beside me,
.Waits until I fall asleep
.Then she leaves
.But then I sometimes get really scary nightmares....

My Mum
She is fed up with me because:
.She has to go to bed at the same time as me
.She wants to sleep with my dad(even though he snores)
.She wants privacy
.I am a rough sleeper(sometimes accidentaly smack her)
.She has done this for 13 LONG YEARS and can't take anymore!

P.S It doesn't work,sleeping with the TV on. SORRY!!!!!
And I not mentaly ill so I don't need to see a phycatrist or whatever they are called.
Plus

Dec 18, 2012
selena
by: Anonymous

Hey selena when your mum meant safe she meant no pictures or stuff lying around. You may think its just clothes but wait till its time to sleep then your imagination will go wild...
When i say wildi mean ghosts monsters.....E.C.T

Dec 18, 2012
13 yr old sis who hasmt slept alone for 7 years
by: Anonymous

For the past seven years my sister has been sleeping on my floor ornparents floor. She is 13 now and is still terrified. I remember the night this horrible thing started. We watched a snake show when she was 6 . We climbed into bed and for some reason she felt snakes and coyotes in her bed. It has never been a peaceful sleep.since.My parents have tried everything. They even let our dog sleep with her but ti no avail. She claims she is "just scared" of robbers and other things but we live in a safe suburb where the wordt crime would be stealing a candy bar. Sometimes i think she is just lying but reading these commentd make me realize that apparently shes not. I am just so fed up with it though. I have to wake up early for school (same time as her) but i end up lacking sleep. She has no problem going to school or sleepovers it is just when she is with just our family at night. She also goes to camp (seperate one than me) for 2 weeks and is anxious heading out but is fine. We have tried melatonin but she refuses to take it. It helps her a bit but she wont take it. I was wondering if anyome had techniqeues or someway i could talk to her about it. My parents both work full time and my mother has to wake up at 5 every morning. My sister keeps them up all the time amd i feel sooo very bad. I want them to get their sleep. So please could i have some techniques or and ways that may help. Thank you!!! It would mean so much.

Dec 23, 2012
USED TO SLEEP WITH A PARENT A YEAR AGO I GOT OLDER AND GOT POPULAR AT SCHOOL
by: Anonymous

im about to be 13 next month like a month after i turned 12 i felt the erge to go to sleep by myself with sports going on like football i got independent.

Dec 24, 2012
This Should Help!!!!
by: Raye

Hi Im Raye im 13 when i was 12 i had the EXACT same thing only i couldnt stay with friends i only felt safe sleeping with my parents in the room. And i wouldnt sleep through the night EVER i would wake at least 6 times a night because i needed to make sure i was with someone. I was only able to fall asleep if my mom or dad wernt ready to go to sleep and still up watching tv or something. My parents got me a dog and she is an american bulldog ( kind of like a pitbull) but she is the SWEETEST thing! And she sleeps in my bed everynight sometimes i want to sleep with my parents but i dont like having to put her in her pin in fear she might be scared like i was. I would NOT like it if i was terrified and someone locked me in a cage to sleep! So i sugest get her a big dog.

Dec 24, 2012
hello I am 21 years old and I still cant sleep alone
by: Anonymous

When I was 5 my parents divorced, so my dad kept us and since he had to go to work we were left with different baby sitters. Our baby sitters took care of us well but the problem was that they allowed us to watch scary movies. Since then I cant be in the house alone, I cant sleep alone, and im extremely afraid of the dark. I am married now and this has caused problems to my marriage. My husband and family has told me that I should grow up, that im only acting like a child. I do have very bad anxiety and have had it since I can remember. Any noise in the house freaks me out, and sometimes my mind even starts to play tricks on me like Im overthinking it. I do always have to be the first one asleep or else I cant sleep. I haven't watched a scary movie over ten years and the images still remain in my head from the movie the 13 ghost. Im starting to get better with the whole being alone stuff, when I mean better, I mean 20% better but atleast im getting better. Im still very afraid of the dark but the TV on mute does help me alot, I just put a timer on it were it can shut off in one hour. Sooner or later ill be just fine. The reason I haven't gone to a therapist is because im embarrassed that I still have this at my age. I forgot to mention that I was abused by my stepmom for ten years, physically, mentally, and emotionally. I dont know if it might have anything to do with that.

Dec 30, 2012
Confused
by: Anonymous

Hi, I'm gonna be 13 next year and can't sleep this has been going on for awhile now and it's starting to worry me,and I kinda have the same thing you mom's are saying about your kids. I can sleep perfectly when I'm in my mom's bed, but when I'm in my room I can't sleep AT ALL. But if I were to sleep with my tv on its a lil easier. I thought at first that I might be afraid of the dark, and maybe that's part of it(embarrassing as it is to say). But someone please please please help me, I wanna sleep so sooooooooo badly but I can't I mean seriously if I turn out all the lights and try to force myself asleep I could end up laying in bed for hours just looking at my walls before I go to bed! Please help, message me at my email plz brelove51@yahoo.com becuz I most likely wont be on this site again. Thanks for reading, again plz help me :/

Jan 01, 2013
Help!
by: Anonymous

I am 12 and I sleep with my mom every night! I hate it, my mom days that if I start to sleep in my own room, we can re-do it. I see all my friends sleep in their own room and it makes me mad at myself! I really want to get help! My dads a cop, but we live on a busy street. And all those cop shows and stuff on the news doesn't help! I don't even stay home alone, when my moms in the shower I have to stay in her room. When she's on the phone in her room, I sometimes have mini panic attacks. I cannot stay in the car alone when my parents go to get something! I'm so frustrated!

Jan 02, 2013
To the 12 yo above
by: Anonymous

My daughter was just like you, and she is now 15 and sleeping in her own room. She still doesnt like staying alone in the house and when I run into a store she is afraid to stay in the car alone. My daughter was 13 when she started sleeping in her own room without a fuss. It took a lot of courage on her part because she was still afraid but she was ready. I would guess that you to will be ready soon. You should redo your room so its as comfortable as possible. Then you will have to muster up the courage and keep trying. It will happen, it really will. My daughter has me check her closets before she goes to bed and she makes sure all the doors are locked. So, even now at 15 she is still a little fearful but she is working through it. So, whatever it is that will help you, keep trying. Good Luck!

Jan 03, 2013
I understand just how you feel
by: Anonymous

I am 10 years old and still can't sleep in my own bed. I am so glad that I am not the only one, i felt like it was just me. When I go to bed and my older brother is up stairs I don't know why but I have to have his door open. I eventually go to sleep that is a good start but I wake up within I hour and I need to get in my mum and dad's bed but if they don't let me into there bed I cry until I get my own way please i really need help!!!!! I can't sleep without somebody next to me, I feel very scared and unsafe. My mum and dad have tried everything but they don't really understand. I wrote down how I felt and my mum has been looking at different ways to help me. This has been happening for a long time. It has really helped me to read everybody's comments and I'm going to try my best.

Jan 03, 2013
Please help! To people who overcame this problem!
by: Anonymous

I am 14 now and I have the same problem. I will lay in my bed but once it gets to about 11 I will have a panic attack and wake my parents up. But, I am fine if I wake up early and every one else is asleep. The only thing that frightens me is the falling asleep part. To the people who had this problem and overcame it: how did you do it? How did you get over the fear and panic? I feel so bad about the hardship I must be putting my parents through.

Jan 04, 2013
I know how she feels
by: Anonymous

I used to be exactly like your daughter, I'm 13 now and only last year did I begin to sleep in my room the whole night. Before when I tried to sleep in my room I'd have panic attacks and start crying, I became depressed which made things even worse at night I remember thinking I was crazy because all my friends could sleep in there own. For at least two yeas I slept on a pull out bed in my parents room and then when I tried to be in my own rom I could only spend around 2 minutes in there, I had no idea why this was happening to me but I remember feeling really ashamed and guilty because my parents had to deal with me. Luckily the thing that got me through it was perseverance I laid in bed and told myself I didn't need to fall asleep there are loads of people awake and nothing will happen to me if I don't fall asleep but obviously after a while everyone will. I also listened to music from my iPod/ relaxing melodies there very calm and I found that relaxing, also my radio helped at first. Another reason I simply couldn't sleep on the pull out bed any more is that the bed is 5"7 inch long and im 5"11 so I could never sleep on there now. I wouldn't worry too mucgs bout your daughter, I used to think I'd never grow out of it, but I did and so will your daughter eventually.

Jan 05, 2013
HELP
by: Anonymous

I have been sleeping with my parents since i remember, but now I can't sleep on my own!! I'm 12, And whenever I go to sleep I have this weird feeling of being scared and I feel like I can't calm down. The comments above have been helping me. My parents make me go to sleep by myself but whenever I try, I start getting that feeling and I cry. I feel like I'm a baby and I can't tell my friends or I would be really embarrassed. When I do sleep with my mom I can go to sleep right away. My 11 year old brother sometimes sleeps in the same room in a different bed but it still doesn't help. I have tried reading or watching youtube before I go to sleep but it doesn't help. Sometimes I fall to sleep right away but I always wake up in the middle of the night. Thanks for the comments and thank you for anyone who helped and will help me. <3

Jan 05, 2013
im 13 and I cant be the last one to go to sleep on my own :(
by: Anonymous

I cant be the last person awake, I cant sleep it stinks :( someone help..

Jan 06, 2013
Sleep
by: Anonymous

My duaghter is 13 and cant sleep alone. What can i do to help her and get her to sleep in her on room by her self? Please help.

Jan 09, 2013
I NEED HELP
by: Anonymous

I'm 10 yo and I can't sleep either, every time my mom says I'm going to sleep by my self, I say yes then get all scared and then sleep in her room, and tonight she"s making me sleep alone and I need HELP, I ask my friends but sense they don't have that problem I thought I was alone, but I realised I'm not.So I'm still worried, is any one here to reply? HELP WANTED

Jan 10, 2013
i cant fall asleep in my own room
by: Anonymous

Hi, i used to share room with my younger brother untill i was 12. When i turned twelve i got my own room. Before that i had always been scared of sleeping by my own, but when i got my room i fell asleep in just a few minutes. A few months later when it was summer vacation, i saw this commercial on tv about horror movies, thats when i started sleeping in my parents room. During the whole summer vacation i slept in my parents room, until we started school again, thats when i forced myself to sleep in my own room. I could fall asleep in my room during the weekdays but during the weekends i slept in my parents room. Two months later me and my cousins watched a horror movie, i didnt even watch it but i am so scared. It has gone two months of me sleeping on the floor in my parents room. Please help me, i am now thirteen and i cant sleep in my room! I really want your help and advice!

Jan 11, 2013
My brother can relate but it gone
by: Anonymous

My brother is 7 .All the years he couldn't sleep alone otherwise he would cry and just run into parents room. Half way through his life being 7 we went to IKEA and there was an teddy bear he really liked so he promised us that he will sleep alone if we bought him the teddy . My parents agreed from that day he sleeps alone knowing he has a little fluffy friend next to him . Everything changed although he sleeps with him mom sometimes

Jan 14, 2013
can't sleep alone
by: Sylvia

I'm 64 years old, and I can't sleep Alone in my house, I never did, it make me crazy, I married, I have to wait for my husband to go to bed, Waht i'm going to do if something happen to Him, and believe I try many times, I state one night bye my in my house, i din't sleep all night, even i turn all the lights in the house the tv on, what it is? I don't Know Who can help me.

Jan 20, 2013
help
by: Anonymous

I am twelve and every Sunday I can't get to sleep but it used to be all the time but at my dads my dad has to sleep with me and at my mums I ask her can I have the laptop to read sometimes my mum would say would u like your dog beside u but I say no cause he would keep me awake went to the doctors there advice didn't work so can somebody give me some advice

Jan 28, 2013
12 Year Old Thar Is Unable To Sleep Alone
by: Anonymous

I am facing the same issues, with my 12 year old daughter. I feel much better knowing that we are not alone. She is an very smart well rounded kid that does very well academically, bu exhibits anxiety every night when bed time approaches. I used have to lie in bed with her so she can fall asleep, but as soon as I leave she is up. Now I sit in her room, but as soon I leave she is awake, she wakes up ever so often to check if I am still there. This is affecting both our sleep and has been going on for years. I know she really does not want to be in bed with her parents, she has apologize and has expressed how embarassing this is for her. But I am now getting a better understanding of how to work along with her to help to feel safe and to not add to her anxiety. I need to pack lots more love and patience!

Feb 03, 2013
im too scared
by: Anonymous

i am 12 and am gonna be 13 in a month i am really scared to fall asleep i have to do somethin until i fall asleep! i can sleep in my own bed but when i lie im bed i start thinking things (bad things) and then i get really scared and cant sleep i also hve exams coming up and it really effects me because i dont get to sleep till 3 then have to get up at 6 !!! i cry at school becausr 1 im tired and 2 i get scared about everythin!! im too afraid to tell my parents this so please help me what should i do!!!

Feb 04, 2013
I can't sleep alone!!!
by: Nisa

Hey all, i just googled "I hate sleeping alone" and i found this site, im 15 yrs old girl and i cant sleep alone. I have 2sisters and a brother. i sleep with my 14yr old sister and my 11 year old sister sleeps with my 6yr old brother&my mother. My father sleeps in another room. My room is un upstairs but then one day, i was just so stressedfull, i even didnt know wht was happened with me, i did see a creepy little boy right beside my closet, i was so scared, i told that story to my parents, they took care of it, after that i cant sleep in my room. i cant sleep in the upstair, so i sleep with mattrass in the living room with my 14yr old sister, there was an airconditioner and gorden who cover us from tv. None of us sleep in the upstair bcuz its too scary. its about more thn a year i be like this. i think im not normal or just the only one like this. my parents force me to sleep alone in the upstair but then im just too scared, i dont say that to my parents i just hide it. can anyone help me please?? I ask my parents to decorate my room first but they say if we decorate ur room then you dont want to sleep in your room again, they just dont believe it. they just force but they do nothing :( im just so sad, i just need someone to explain about what's happening with me. am i not normal? Thnx :) im from indonesia by the way :)

Feb 04, 2013
There is hope
by: Anonymous

My daughter is 14, she has just started sleeping in her own room. She has been terrified for so many years due to a scary movie she saw a long time ago. She didn't know why she was scared. She had to sleep next to me on the floor in my room for a long time. I kept telling her, she would grow out of it, it was all in her mind and she had control of her mind. When she was ready, she woyuld stop being scared. at first she stayed on teh floor in our room. We made her sleep outside our door after awhile and this was a big step for her. she got used to it. Then we made her sleep on the couch a few metres down the hall from our room...another big step. Gradually she got used to being away from us. She shared a bedroom with her brother all these years but would only sleep there if we were still awake. This christmas holiday her brother said he wanted his own room. she was really against it and didn't want to do that because of fear. We got her excited about having her own room. we moved their rooms over two days. We bought her a special book shelf for all her things. We let her paint a wall in her room bright aqua. Her room looks great. She has started sleeping in their all by herself. That was her decision. She knows if she gets scared she can sleep in the hallway near us. She decided all by herself. We have always told her the problem is the way she thinks about things and she needs to talk to herself and convince herself she is safe. she has to believe that there is nothing to be scared of and everything will be alright. You need to believe that the fear is in your mind and you have the power to make it go away. You have to have the courage and belief that this problem will go away if you try really really hard. Tell your parents you want to try really hard and you need their support and help. Try bit by bit. My daughters move away from our room happened over one year. She was frightened for 6 years before that.

Feb 07, 2013
I'm not alone! Thank you!
by: Anonymous

Hi. I just turned 11 and lately i've been really upset about sleeping in my own room. i always feel weird about it, but i always end up in my parent's room on a mattress at night. everything on the news gets me scared and i can never EVER sleep alone. I've tried but i wake up in 2:00 a.m. and come to my parent's room :( but now that i'm not alone, it makes me feel better knowing i'm just going through a phase and shouldn't worry. :D

Feb 09, 2013
I'm still sleeping with my dad!!!
by: David

Hey all my name is david and i'm 14. I have no mom and i never know who my mom is, i just have dad. and i've been living with my dad whole my life. my dad is my mom and my dad. he's just like 2parents. I always sleep with my dad in his room, i cant sleep alone, maybe if i angry with my dad i just go upstair and sleep in my room but then about an hour later, i'll end up in my dad's room but my dad is always fine with that, he one day ever said to me "till when you sleep in my room?" but he wasnt angry i think he just kidded. Some of my friends know it and they just yell at me "daddy's boy" i just get annoyed by that but i have to accept that. Every time i sllep in my room, i feel not safe, i feel like there's no one else in the home but me. I feel like someone is watching and someone's gonna take me. Ever since i was kid, i always slept in my dad's room, i had to have his hand by my side so i could sleep, and thats my habit, till now i have to sleep in my dad's room but now i dont really need my dad's hand. but in the afternoon/evening i can spend my time in my room, there's no problem with that, my room is also good, my dad has been decorated it for many times and my friends say that my room is just like "dreaming room" and i do think so too. So what should i do? im 14 years old and i am a boy who still sleep with daddy. Am i not normal? i just sigh in relief because there's not just me who like this :(..

Feb 16, 2013
my story
by: Anonymous

I used to be the same just not as bad ....i am now 13 and when i was about 10 or 11 i would hate being the last one up i would sit on the landing and cry to wake everyone up and make them stay awake untill i was asleep i dont know why ?? I just did ....but now i am fine with being the last one up and when i was little i used to sneak into my muns bed .......now i have the problem that i get home sick and dont like staying out :(

Feb 18, 2013
Sleep anxiety
by: Anonymous

I'm 13 and I can't sleep by myself! Please help my parents won't let me have a tv even though I believe that will help! They r too tough on me and it got to a point last year that I tried to run away! Any suggestions?

Feb 21, 2013
Sleep
by: Anonymous

I'm 13 as well my sleep history isn't good when I first got my bed it was great I had a little trouble but after that it was good but one day someone broke in my room took personal things and values then the nightmares I got over it later down the road then my gramp died then the sleep walking then farther mother wert together any more I was fine with that till he stock us then I peed the bed had nightmares the hole nine yards I was 5 when my mom and farther and then my grams I was7 the break in I was 6 so yeah not good petty much since then me and mom

Feb 24, 2013
My 13 yr old daughter cannot sleep without me.
by: Anonymous

I'm so pleased to find these comments. Our 13 yr old (nearly 14) has always had a problem sleeping on her own. She gets very upset at just the suggestion of trying to sleep on her own. I thought we were the only ones going through this and that it was all my fault for not doing something a long time ago. Our daughter is such a lovely person and doing very well at school, but has never been able to sleep without me. It has caused a lot of problems between myself and my husband. He is understanding most of the time. Seeing from all the comments on here, hopefully it's something she will grow out of.

Feb 26, 2013
8 year old can't sleep since Sandy Hook
by: Anonymous

My 8 year old daughter used to sleep by herself but since the school shooting she has been afraid to sleep alone. WE Have to air at the bottom of her bed until she falls asleep. She wakes up several times a night and calls for me. I try to keep her from waking her sister so I go right in to her room. She is scared that someone is going to barge in to our house and shoot us. There are nights I get only a couple hours of sleep a night. It is staying to affect our marriage. My husband thinks she is manipulating us to get what she wants.

Mar 01, 2013
I'm 14 and having the same problem ..
by: Anonymous

It's funny . I thought I was the only one with this problem . I'm actually in the middle of another night right now .. It started when I was like 6-7 maybe . I saw something about a little girl being kidnapped from her home on the news and in a magazine . The fear has stayed with me ever since . For a long time I would just sleep on a matress right next to my parent's bed . I feel like a baby . No one understands either . So no one can help .. It's honestly a horrible feeling .. I tried to sleep in my room tonight because I'm too terrified but I'm hearing noises from outside and around the house . Plus it's really dark .. I don't really know what to do at this point .. I have no idea what's wrong . I want to know how to fix it though .. It really sucks ..

Mar 19, 2013
I'm 11
by: Anonymous

I'm the same I'm afraid that someone is going to kill me wile I'm sleeping me and when I started sleeping in my own bed like 2 months late some one at 3 am rang the door bell and freaked me out!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Apr 09, 2013
Don't give up hope
by: Anonymous

My son has just turned 16 & has always had problems with sleeping. He has never been able to self settle & gets very anxious about falling asleep if there is no one else awake in the house. We have tried a number of strategies including letting him sleep on our floor or sitting with him til he falls asleep , he has also had counselling & CBT. Sadly last year we lost a family friend, and he lost a school friend to SADS. He began to suffer extreme anxiety about sleeping, convinced he would die in his bed. He suffered with palpitations at bedtime and was anxious to the point of vomiting. Through CBT and just general maturation , he has learnt to deal with the anxiety and can use strategies to distract himself. He will listen to music or watch TV and is finally going to bed alone. We have the occasional night where he wakes but things are improving. To all those out there, do not give up hope , it will get better.

Apr 10, 2013
The same but worse pls help!!!
by: Anonymous

Hi I'm 12 years old and I still sleep with my mum, It's always been me and my mum. when my parents divorced I got really attached to my mum, I slept with her since I was about 4. ever since I hated sleeping alone whenever my mum tells me to sleep alone I agree telling myself its easy but when it gets dark right befor I'm about to sleep I have panic attacks I feel like I'm about to have a heart attack I sweat and I never fall asleep!! It's effecting my mums social life too, I've tried sleeping alone but scary thoughts fill my mind, I also have the habit of having to cover my head and whole body with the duvet when sleeping so I don't see anything scary.im scared of the dark too. I sometimes cry myself to sleep if that doesn't get me to sleep I go to my mum but she gets really angry!! I now still am sleeping with her and am getting tired of acting so babyish. Pls help my panic sleeping problems! I've considered a therapist but I'm not going mad, I've even considered strong sleeping pills that make me sleep easily ( if the even exist) any ideas pls!!!!! I'll do anything. PS I HATE SLEEPOVERS TOO THE ONLY TIME I SLEEP IN MY ROOM IS WHEN SOMEONE'S IN THERRE WITH ME!! HELP!

Apr 10, 2013
DON'T LOSE HOPE!!!
by: Anonymous

To all of the above comments;

Don't lose hope!! Believe me it will happen, you will sleep in your own room and you will sleep alone! You can do this, every single one of you. There is no timeline and it happens differently for everyone. To the 18yo, don't lose hope, it is going to work out. There are so many other 18+ year olds out there that feel just as you do. In college, I couldn't sleep if my roommate wasn't in the room. I would have such anxiety. But every time you do it, it becomes easier and easier. Don't beat yourself up over it, don't be embarrassed. I cannot tell you that since I started this website, I am sooooo amazed and baffled by the amount of people that have this issue. There is NOTHING "wrong" with you all, it is an issue. Pure and simple. Just like any other issue, and you have to work through it. It takes time and a continued effort. It will happen. DON'T LOSE HOPE!!!

Apr 28, 2013
Help
by: Anonymous

I'm 18 years old and I'm unable to sleep alone. I lay in bed at night panicked and worried then I become stressed and cry because I can't sleep until eventually at about 5 am I'm so tired I practically pass out. I shake so badly while I'm lying in bed it's driving me insane I'm so scared, I don't even know what of, I just get stressed sleeping alone/ being alone at night. Im at university and live in the accommodation there so I'm never completely alone as there's always people in my flat and the surrounding flats. But I can't sleep in a bed alone at all without being extremely anxious and stressed. When my boyfriend stays I can fall asleep easily within ten minutes and sleep got the full night, but without him here I just can't stop being panicked. I also have a stuffed animal I have to sleep with, of I can't find her I become extremely stressed, anxious and I cry, I know it's pathetic but please does anyone know any way to help???

Apr 28, 2013
There is hope
by: Anonymous

My 13 year old is now sleeping in her room alone! She shared a room with her brother until the start of this year but always got scared. She was the same as everyone in this forum..from the age of 8 years... Terrified, panic attacks etc. Over a one year period we got her to slowly move from on the floor next to my bed to in the corridor next to our bed to on the couch a few metres down the hall from our bed. At the beginning of this year her brother said he wanted his own room. She didn't want to move. We got her excited about decorating her new room. Gave her the bigger and better room. painted the wall aqua (her choice) bought some new furniture etc. She has slept in that bed all alone since!!!Now 14 years old. She knows and has the security that she can always come to us if she is scared. She says she got sick of it! and decided she couldn't stand it anymore and made up her mind to conquer her fear. We have always told her the fear is in her mind. We bought her tapes to listen to called conquer your fears ://www.myanxiouschild.com/
we always told her that one day she will not be afraid anymore. it is important that your child really believes that they will get over it. if they believe the fear will one day go away....it will...because they have the power to make it go away. Best wishes to everyone.

May 10, 2013
help her
by: Big_Brother

If she cannot sleep alone, sleep along with the kid till she comes of age and is able to sleep alone, there is nothing wrong in it as there is no sex involved only you are assuring her.

May 13, 2013
Solution
by: Anonymous

I am 12 years old and I can't sleep when I don't sleep with my dog but when I do I can do maybe that will help your 13 year old

May 13, 2013
Float with the same boat
by: Anonymous

Hello this is a 12 year old as well and im very scared to sleep alone im always getting my little brother to sleep in my room or i sleep on the floor in my parents room, they think im faking it but im truly not i have no idea what to do like i said im only 12 im not sure. I want to sleep only i truly do but its like i hear things coming throw my window or someone unlocking the door so im very scared as well but i hope you daughter gets the help she need with the problem and tell her she's not alone :)

Jun 22, 2013
I am technically your daughter.. In a metaphorical sense
by: Anonymous

I am 15. I am in your daughters situation. I too have bad dreams when I sleep alone. It scares me to death to sleep alone. It has every since I was little. I have a queen size bed and make my sister sleep with me. She's 10. My dad has to sleep on the couch when his wife's away, and his psychiatrist said he has warm body syndrome which is what I may have.

Jun 30, 2013
I'm 17
by: Anonymous

both my younger brother and sister are having the exact same issue I used to have, my brother is now 10 my parents are very concerned about him but since i was just like them i know they'll get past it. i spent so many sleepless nights just because i was scared something will pop out or i would start to imagine things in the dark, my parents actually don't know this because every time i would sleep in my sisters room in her bed (sometimes without having her notice me) this continued till i became 15 now i'm finally able to sleep on my own but i still get scared from time to time.

Jul 02, 2013
I totally understand
by: Anonymous

I thought I was the only one who had this fear, but now I see so many other people have it as well. I'm 14, and I'm terrified of sleeping alone, and the dark. My adhd might play a part, too. I come from a large family, so I usually always had to share a room or bed with one of my sisters. But now l have my own room, and it's upstairs and I'm all by myself up there. Right now I sleep with my mom because I'm too scared to sleep in my room. :( also, when I go to my dad's house, I end up sleeping next to my grandma because I feel safer than if I slept on the couch, where it's dark. I feel like it's taking over my life!

Jul 03, 2013
Me too!!!
by: Anonymous

Me too!!! Totally!!! I feel your pain! I am eleven years old and can't sleep without either a nightlight and the door open or someone right beside me. I get really embarrassed about this in front of anyone. To help 'cure' myself, every night I sleep with the door less and less open, then the nightlight less and less bright. But I always end up turning the light on to its original brightness (my nightlight has adjustable brightness) and sleep with the door wide open. I believe that the reason I leave my door open is because I feel trapped when I don't. I don't know why I leave my nightlight on. That has always been a mystery.

Jul 05, 2013
Same
by: Anonymous

My daughter is 9 and she hates being by herself. She thinks someone's going to take in the middle of the night!:(

Jul 09, 2013
15 and scared
by: Anonymous

Well you know I'm 15... When I was little I slept in the same room as my brother. But one night things happened in my parents room so I woke up and well my dad was drunk or something ( I was 7) and he was dad and my mom was crying well it's a long story. But when they divorced I decided I was going to sleep in my mom's bed 'cause I though she would feel alone after 25 years sleeping with someone next to her. Anyway later on my sister came to join us ( she is 11 years older than me) because there were mosquitos in her bedroom.
When my brother and sister left the house to study outside of our city it was only my mom and I in our house. I kept sleeping with her until I had horrible dreams HORRIBLE and for a week I was afraid to sleep because I knew I would have bad dreams( this was not very long ago) and well after some time I thought that maybe if I slept in the bedroom, were all my things are, I would feel safer ( I just thought ) This worked for sometime but I had bad dreams again, and even if I didn't I was always afraid of something, I just didn't know what. I used to cry because of the panic. Sometimes I heard things but then I wasn't sure if it was a dream or not ( like when your falling asleep and you start thinking or barely dreaming non sense stuff) anyway I endend up running to my moms room and sleeping there because now I felt safer there. I tried to sleep in my room every night but I always ended in at my moms. Sometimes my brother or sister spend their vacations with us and they usually stay up late and its easier for me go sleep because I can hear them down staris and some lights are on. I don't know I just panic... But good luck to everyone else

Jul 15, 2013
HELP
by: Anonymous

hi I am nearly 13 and I cannot sleep I wish I could leave my parents alone I have to sleep with my mum and I am splitting my parents up from sleeping together. I hate it I also fell bad it stinks help me be not so nervous.
P.S. the tv or sleeping drops don't work and nethier does special care. I need help and fast!!

Jul 16, 2013
to the 13 year old girl and all others too
by: Anonymous

To the 13 year old. Believe in yourself and your ability to get over this. You have the power to control your fear. My daughter is 14 and she only just started sleeping in her own room at the beginning of this year. She decided she wanted to conquer this fear...she was sick of it. She still gets a little anxious every now and then but has slept on her own all year. All of the posts are correct. When the time is right you will decide to get over your fear. The fear is in your head. It is not real. Remember that. Best wishes.

Jul 18, 2013
Im 13 and im having the same problem too!!
by: Anonymous

I used to sleep with my dad and now I have my own room and I can't sleep at night!!! Ive had my own room for about 3 weeks because we moved but now i cry at night and sometimes my dad comes into my room at night and says "Bella, whats wrong?". Its so stupid because I haven't had any sleep for 3 days!!! Does anyone know a solution?

Jul 18, 2013
Help
by: Anonymous

I'm 11 yr and have been sleeping with my parents since I was a baby. I get scared and go into my parents room I always get kicked out, I didn't used to. I sleep with my six yr brother who has the same problem, not as bad. Please help I want it to stop. I stay up all night reading, and if I fall a sleep I wake up at 5:30. I want to sleep in my own bed but cant!

Jul 18, 2013
To the 13 yr old and 11 yr old
by: Anonymous

I bought these tapes (see below) for my 13 year old daughter after years of this problem. They helped her overcome her fear of sleeping alone. They are based on cognitive behavioural therapy. They are expensive but well worth the money. If you really want to get over this problem you have to be determined and put in the effort. You have to work at it and it will not be easy. Don't expect someone else to fix this problem for you. You have the power to fix it yourself. Ask your parents to buy these tapes for you. I think they will help you to see things more clearly and change the way you think about things so that you can get over this fear.

http://www.myanxiouschild.com/

please note - I have no affiliation with the makers of these tapes. I just feel for you all who are experiencing what my daughter went through. It is not easy to deal with but the tapes helped her. Maybe they can help you too.

Jul 18, 2013
Help me please!!!!!
by: Anonymous

Hi, I'm 12 years old and I can't sleep in my own room but I can sleep in the living room on the couch with the tv on... I've tried to sleep in my own room but I just can't...my parents tried to bribe me with redoin my room all the way to a new iPhone 5 but I tried and tried, my mom said that I can't sleep In my room cause I'm telling myself I can't but idk plezzzz just help me!!!!

Jul 21, 2013
Im 13 and cannot sleep
by: Anonymous

Hi sorry to but in to your conversations.
im 13 and I cant sleep without my mum with me. She will sit on a chair with me until I get to sleep.
I dont know what the feeling is, but I get quite nervous. i tried on my own the other night and all i could do is face the chair which my mum sits on. so that night didnt work.I really need help! its killing me to think of the effects in later life:(

Aug 06, 2013
13 year old girl
by: Anonymous

I have an issue with going to sleep without anyone else. I can go to sleep with my mom, but if she wakes up before me and leaves the room, I will wake up in the midst of a horrible nightmare. A lot of them involve my dad being physically harmed or me being emotionally harmed. I think the best thing to do is to ask her to keep a dream diary or ask her about her dreams and possibly ask a professional or do some research on what the dreams mean.

Aug 11, 2013
Anonymous
by: Anonymous

Okay so I'm thirteen and when I was 11 I had a similair problem I could go to sleep if my mom or sister where stil awake but in the middle of the night I would have to go me sleep with my mom who is a single parent but she started getting annoyed because I kept waking her. We practically tried everything but in the end I just stopped and I've not don't it for at leas a year

Aug 27, 2013
GET A DOCTOR!! ( from experience)
by: Anonymous

im 13 and i had the same problem, i could sometimes got to sleep by myself but i kept waking up in the night nd keeping my parents awake, i really think you should go to a sleep clinic and get some professional help because thats what my mum took me too and now i sleep ALOT better. dont think that they'll treat you crazy because they dont they're actually really good and at school you can just say you are going to a doctors appointment! i help this helps.

Sep 04, 2013
adult children
by: Anonymous

I once dated a woman that had a 14 year old daughter. When I met them they slept together. I dated her for 2 years and the daughter always slept with her. The daughter was fine sleeping by herself - the mom wanted the daughter to sleep with her. It was the mom that was afraid to sleep alone. I understand they still sleep together and the daughter is now 19

I also dated another woman that slept with her 18 year old daughter. She slept with her daughter her entire life.

I don't understand this practice at all. I understand sleeping with your children when they are young (up to 5 years old). But, I do not understand sleeping with your almost adult and adult children. Can someone shed some light on this for me.

Sep 08, 2013
My 11 year old is afraid to sleep alone
by: Anonymous

I am glad we are not the only ones having this problem but me and my husband are at our wits end. Up until now we have given in and have just slept next to our daughter. But it is very stressful that she can't sleep on her own. She is very popular and outgoing and plays lots of sports. We have even threatened to take away soccer, which she loves. I just don't know what to do. I may try the tapes someone reccomended or take her to a physchologist. Maybe a sleep clinic? I'm not sure. But I want her to be independent and not fearful and to overcome this. I feel like this will never happen.

Sep 30, 2013
my 10 year old is afraid to sleep alone
by: Anonymous

My 10 year old daughter is the same way she will not sleep alone at night.So we tryed some medication it would help her sleep but still not alone.Im getting very nervous because she wont even go to her friends to spend the night she would always call home to get picked up. She claimed she is not scared of the dark she can do it but hasnt we are starting at bunk beds then small sleep overs take it one step at a time.Wish you luck

Sep 30, 2013
my 10 year old is afraid to sleep alone
by: Anonymous

My 10 year old daughter is the same way she will not sleep alone at night.So we tryed some medication it would help her sleep but still not alone.Im getting very nervous because she wont even go to her friends to spend the night she would always call home to get picked up. She claimed she is not scared of the dark she can do it but hasnt we are starting at bunk beds then small sleep overs take it one step at a time.Wish you luck

Oct 10, 2013
Me to me to me to
by: Anonymous

I am 12 and completely dread sleeping by myself or even just in my room! It all started in April and has been going on for 7 MONTHS!!!! I have to sleep with my mum in her room and my dad has been sleeping in my room for all that time. I feel so embarrassed about it but can't seem to help it. Even just thinking about having to sleep by myself can change my whole mood. I have been to see someone the other day and what she basically said was that I had to sleep alone. I managed to cope for the first time last night but with my dog but I just don't want to go through it again tonight! I just don't know what to do. I am quite happy that some other people are having the same problem because I did feel very alone and stupid. I JUST DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO PLEASE HELP!!!!!!! I have tried eveything; sleeping remedies, night lights, music, reading, drawing. Nothing works I hope that it will just sort itself out in time but if anyone knows what to do then PLEASE TELL ME HOW TO SOLVE THIS : /

Dec 24, 2013
were the same
by: Anonymous

Im a thirteen year old girl after i watched horror movie i just can't fall asleep around 1 am to 2 am im awake and im scared when my two brothers sleep before me when i put my blanket in my head to cover my face then i suddenly feel someone is beside me then i always have to get up and look then i feel someone near me and then something moving which i don't know and it irritates me that i want to sleep on my own and not with my parents it makes me feel baby this started at december 23

Dec 30, 2013
same here, im 14
by: Anonymous

Hi so now I'm 14, but when I was 11 I watched some of the original Exorcist. For one year after that I could not sleep in my room, and even when someone said exorcist I would get a little scared. Now my mom sleeps in my room and I sleep in her room. I just want this to be over already, but at night I always over think and freak out. I promise you I want to end this but there's something about my room in particular. Though I can sleep in my moms room alone, I can't have or go to any sleepovers or go to camp. I'm worried about high school trips, and college. I want to be able to do those normal teen things, and though I know I'm not alone, I still don't feel normal. I just need to take that last step, but it seems to be the biggest one.

Dec 31, 2013
Goin though the same thing
by: Jenny

My 12 year old son is goin through this same thing...he always has slept in his on room until about 3 or 4 months ago. He says he doesn't feel comfortable sleeping by himself anymore. Some nights he's fine and others he begs for his 6 year old sister to sleep with him. Do y'all think it's okay to allow the sibling to sleep with him? At first I had no compassion but now I truly think he is uncomfortable and want to reassure him he is safe. We have lived in the same house his whole life so it's hard to understand why he would be uncomfortable. In search for answers.....

Jan 11, 2014
Finally content!!
by: Anon

I slept in my mothers bed from 12 til I was 17. One night I was so scared to sleep alone and I asked to sleep in my mums bed she said yes and ever since I slept there. I would cry and cry and cry if she made me sleep in my own bed and I couldn't even go to bed till she was going. I would be physically sick if she told me I had to sleep alone and I would eventually end up sleeping there.

I was seriously so embarrassed about this issue! I felt horrible and terrible and I felt so ashamed that I was so scared.
Lucky for me my mum didn't force me to sleep in my own room.

I think the fact that I was so embarrassed kinda made me get over my fear - I was going into my final year of school and I got to renovate my bedroom and I just slept there and it was no longer an issue.

YOUR CHILDREN NEED PATIENCE (AND A SLIGHT PUSH). THEY DO NOT NEED YOU TO BE HARSH OR JUDGMENTAL. THEY NEED YOUR LOVE AND UNDERSTANDING.

Jan 17, 2014
15 Years Old, Still Can't Sleep Aline
by: Kitty Kitty Meow Meow

I'm 15 and I CAN'T sleep alone. I usually sleep with my grandmother whom lives with my mother and I, but whenever we fight I'm stuck at night staying up to avoid her. I have no idea why I'm scared to sleep in my room, but I can spend the night at a friends house, no problem

Jan 30, 2014
I am a 12 year old boy
by:

Ok first I all way slep with my Grama when I was a baby and ever sconce I want to sleep with anyone around me I can sleep by myself but I prefer to have someone in a nother bed across the room like when my sister says you can't sleep in here tonight I get worked up PLESE HElP

Jan 30, 2014
I am a 12 year old boy
by:

Ok first I all way slep with my Grama when I was a baby and ever sconce I want to sleep with anyone around me I can sleep by myself but I prefer to have someone in a nother bed across the room like when my sister says you can't sleep in here tonight I get worked up PLESE HElP

Feb 08, 2014
My 12 year old won't be on her own.
by: Anonymous

My 12 year old daughter won't sleep on her own and never has since born. She shares a bedroom with her older sister who hates sharing her room. My 12 year old has her own room which she has never used. She won't not only sleep on her own but also won't go upstairs on her own. She says she is scared but can't tell us why. She won't stay upstairs day or night unless someone else is upstairs with her. I hope that she grows out of this as it causes so many problems and stress on the whole family.

Feb 27, 2014
my 4 year old girl
by: Anonymous

my 4 year old girl woke screaming the other night sayin she seen a man in black in her room ever since she will not sleep on her room and is shaking and cryin and begging me to sleep with her i dont know what to do for the wee pet my heart is broke for her

Mar 06, 2014
HELP
by: Anonymous

Ok, this is a long story. So last year about 1 month before christmas, I read the hunger games and it scared the crap outta me! I'm a only child and very out going during the day.
It stopped around May. Now 3 days after thanksgiving I couldn't sleep by myself at all.(ok so I have slept on the floor in my parents room, but around 12 I come and sleep in my room with no problem. And I'm 13 btw) my parents threaten and yell and i said just wait it out like you all said. They don't listen! How can I tell them??? Please help! Just in the beginning of the night I can't sleep by my self... I feel scared in my room! And is making me stay in my room for an hour a big punishment? I think it is they don't! Please awnser!!

Apr 13, 2014
I am 13 going through the same
by: Anonymous

I know exactly what hes going through i am the same age and do the same its just on like facebook or instagram their can be scary pics of the exersist and stuff saying if u dont like they she will get u. Well like me i get scared when it happens too me. But all i do is check under my bed, in my wardrobe, shut all the doors and leave my bedroon light on all night and make sure my dog is on my bed when i go to sleep. I also like to read a book it makes u sleepy and destracted from monsters. I would suggest buying her a dog cos it really help also small steps like just sitting on the landing till she falls asleep. In early stages dont turn her light off at night then she will wake up, or to save enery put a lamp on then turn the light off. Shes not the only person who does it trust me. NOTE i am not suggesting to take her off facebook or instagram.

Apr 16, 2014
My troubles with sleep (edit)
by: 13 yr old girl serena

In addition to the comment I left above, my sister had left in grade 11 (16 yrs) and is almost finished school in grade 12, so I still sleep with her sometimes. I'm in highschool now, which is good because I'm always so busy! S

Apr 20, 2014
It Was The Same With Me
by: Anonymous

Although I maybe be a bit older, when I was about 9-10ish I was really scared to go to sleep on my own, I think that more than anything else it was the darkness, and the nightmares, I did sleep in my room, for a number of years, but I was too used to sharing with my brother, it came a shock to me, when we got our own bedrooms, because I knew that there wasn't anyone close to me, I remeber, when I got my room, I would make my mum come up to my room with me, when it was time to go to sleep, and make her sit at the end of my bed, and tuck me up, untill I fell asleep, sometimes I woke up, and found she wasn't there, and it really panicked me, so I screamed, and she came, I guess she got annoyed at having to come up to bed with me every night, so a couple of night, she wouldn't come up, it scared me, because I didn't want to have nightmares, and it made me cry, so then mum took me up, I soon realised that I didnt need mum to take me up, but I used to cry myself to sleep, but eventually I just tried to go to sleep without her, because I wanted her to feel proud of me, which she was, then after about a week, I was okay, and the problem went away, so i guess it is just a thing that some kids will have and it will just pass, but even though in fifteen now, I still sleep with the lamp on...

Apr 25, 2014
share the love
by: Anonymous

Let her sleep in your bed. She will eventually grow out of it. When she is of legal age if she is still there. Your husband or boyfriend can share his love with her. And sow some of his seed inside her too. Just see that she is comfortable. While he shares his love with her and makes her into a woman.

Apr 28, 2014
Same problem - unhappy daddy
by: Clayton

We're having the same problem. Our daughter used to sleep just fine in her own room, then all of a sudden, because of fear, she has to sleep with mommy. I'm the daddy, and I have to sleep on a separate mattress in the same room. The intimacy is destroyed between my wife and I. I feel like I'm not married any more. Our two sons are fine, and never had this problem. It's been going on for about 6 months now. Our little girl has no idea why she's scared or how it started. We'll just ride it out, if I can last that long. I have a feeling she won't grow out of it until she's 13.

May 29, 2014
im 13 icant sleep alone
by: Anonymous

i turned 13 about 17 days ago and i still sleep with my sister i tried sleeping alone but i cant i feel
that air behind me no one sleeping with me i have that scary stuff in my mind i say to my self to go somewhere nice but only thing that i can imagine that plane walls staring at me it freaks me out

May 29, 2014
a few simple solutions
by: Jimmy C.

It might be a little late in coming, but how about a few of these.

When my son was a year old, we put a fish tank in his room. The light on the fish tank became his night light. It was only on when he was in bed. His bedroom door also remained opened, as did ours. That way, he could see across the hall into our room.

Before that, I had a girlfriend who was afraid of the dark. There was a nightlight on in every room of the house. As a joke, one Christmas II gave her enough nightlights to put one in every
outlet in every room. Three dozen nightlights made the entire house look like it was lit by candles.

One last suggestion for your daughter. A dog or a cat would love to sleep on the bed. Might be a simple solution.

May 31, 2014
help me
by: Anonymous

I am only 9 i dont know why i just cant sleep alone i know it is only 10:00 but if someone is on help my parent's closed the door if i say something they will yell.

Jun 05, 2014
I have the same problem
by: Anonymous

I'm eleven and going into the 7th grade and I still cannot sleep alone. My mom really found the extent of mine when we went on vacation. It was me her and my younger brother. I was used to sleeping with one of my parents but my dad wasn't there. so i had to sleep alone. I could not sleep even though someone was in the room. What I have noticed is that I have two main fears; mirrors and anything paranormal. I believe this is why i can't sleep alone. Also, in my room I have NO blinds and my room faces out to the woods and i can hear the coyotes howling. It seriously sucks. I want to be able to but, I can't. then when I think about when I go to college how will I sleep? It feels good to write all of this down. I hope that everyone else can go through this!

Jun 09, 2014
Didn't sleep
by: Anonymous

I was just like this as a child, however my parents being harsh I wasn't allowed to leave my room or have a light on.. As soon as everyone was asleep I'd get up and turn my light on.. They would always turn it off again saying it's wasting power. Because my parents were not sensitive about my fears I'm now 30 and totally scared of the dark.. I have a child and I sleep with a light on and won't walk through the house without a light on. My husband has to travel overseas and I'm just starting to be ok on my own (last few tears) after 9 years of it. My parents thought they were doing the right thing using the hard approach and maybe it was good for me as I'm a very independent person who just happens to be frightened of the dark.. Will not be using this approach with my own children.

Jun 11, 2014
she scare
by: Anonymous

Hi...I understand all you pain and everything,my daughters 16 and is scared of being alone...she gose to bed at 10pm and awakes up around 2-3am and won't sleep...im not sure what I did wrong,but she has always been scare,i now ignore her some nights but I feel that just up sets her,if there is anyone her with good advice to help please do!!!

Jun 14, 2014
I am just like your daughter!
by: Anonymous

I am 12 and I cannot sleep alone at all, I am like this because I don't feel safe in my house, I have no idea why but something about it just throws me off a little.I feel fine in the morning but at night I am terrified.

Jun 18, 2014
I grew into it and figured a way out
by: Anonymous

I used to be a child that could not sleep at friends and when I couldn't fall asleep at night I would just stare at the clock and I would then get anxiety , and that never helps. I always thought it was weird and things like that. I could never go to sleep without noise. I listened to Mozart as a baby and grew up listening to it. If it wasn't playing then I couldn't sleep. For a while when I was little I was able to sleep at friends and then one day i couldn't. I never knew why either. I still needed noise when I fell asleep like I would have to fall asleep while watching a movie. Soon it turned into me not being able to sleep without my music. I have a twin and he grew out of the music quickly and could sleep places fine. This made it worse because I became more angry at myself and blamed myself so I had more anxiety about sleeping. I always played a game where you think of a state, then a animal from there and then another state by using the second letter of the animals name. It worked because your not thinking about sleep which is keeping chemicals in you brain working like there is a problem, which triggers a primordial instinct to stay awake in order to survive. As for the music I turned it down a little each day and when I went somewhere I bring my music on a iPod and plug ear-buds in and put it in my pillow so only i would hear it. Then when i finally really couldn't hear my music I didn't turn it on and I knew I didn't need it anymore. I was 13 and determined to go to a camp and i couldn't bring an iPod so on my own I made it so I didn't need my music anymore and then I could freely sleep places without a problem

Jun 21, 2014
Helpmeet please I'm scared
by: Anonymous

Iim only 11 and I have that problem now and I want to go home I'm soo scAred but my parents are asleep and I don't want to wake themplease help me IM SOOOOOOOOOO scared and now I'm crying please HELP!!!!!!!!!!

Jun 24, 2014
sleep
by: Jake

At night I can not sleep at all it,s like I need a peel to help me go to sleep so that why I feel so dead because nothing don't help me sleep in I a13 years old boy
It's my story

Jul 08, 2014
I can relate
by: Anonymous

I am now fourteen, and can sleep alone in my room with the door closed. All which would've been impossible for me a few months ago. I have had sleeping problem for years now, recently I went to a therapist and it was confirmed that I had separation anxiety. Which made sense, from around the ages of 5-8 i not only refused to leave my parents sided during the night but also during the day, which made attending school rather difficult for both my parents and I (tears and tantrums every morning, that continued in the classroom even after they had left). My separation anxiety never fully went away, even though I was now able to properly function alone during the day, it continued during the night up until my appointment with my therapists. For me knowing the answer to why I couldn't sleep alone was enough to fix it, when I would go to sleep I would tell myself that I wasn't alone my parents were in the room next to me. I haven't had a sleeping issue for the past 10 months (which is a record for me). I reccomend a therapist for anybody with a sleeping issue, no IT IS NOT for crazy people as most people believe it to be. It will provide you with the proper guidance and information you need to help your child. Speaking from experience, not being able to sleep alone can also be very emotionally draining for your child. One thing to keep in mind, as hard as it may be, is that it's not your child's decision to not be able to sleep alone. PATIENCE is key.

Jul 08, 2014
Advice on daughter
by: Anonymous

Hi, I feel for your problems in having a teen daughter who wont sleep in her own bed. As a father my pretty young girl was the same. However at age 13 when I felt her lying in bed next to me my body responded. I would wake up in the night and wrap my arms around her, touch her breasts and press my erection against her. She hated it but stayed in the bed. Then one night lust got the better of me and I rolled on top of her and penetrated her. She was a virgin at the time. After about a minute of grunting and thrusting, I climaxed inside her and immediately felt terrible. My penis wilted out of her body and I rolled off, panting, smelling the scent of semen and pussy. My young daughter lay sobbing in a large damp patch of jism that oozed out of her vagina. Minutes later I wanted more and slipped into her cum-sloppy little snatch.

Jul 14, 2014
I'm 15 and sleep on my parents floor
by: Anonymous

It all started when I was 14..sleep anxiety and depression, but I was able to sleep in my room. Though since two weeks ago I've been sleeping on my parents floor except for one day when I slept in my room, but I feel that they are getting fed up with me sleeping in their room...even though they are not mentioning it. Now I'm 15 and I want to sleep in my room. Can someone help? Please :(

Jul 31, 2014
My story
by: Anonymous

I'm eleven and at nights I used to scream to b with my mum and dad so much that it sounded like I was being beaten up but then one night a week I wud sleep in my parents room on the floor so for a while it stopped but then the other night I got scared and it started again how do I stop it


Btw: the first time it happened about five nights out of Seven for six months

Any help

Jul 31, 2014
9
by: Hi

Hi my daughter is nine and she cannot sleep on her own when she is in her own room she will cry because she is scared if she hears one single noise she will get scared what do I do I need help fast. She has her own room but one time she had a dream that in her closet there was a bear.

Aug 03, 2014
Scared
by: Anonymous

Hi I'm 11 and going through the same thing I've been sleeping with my mom and dad for months now and I get really bed anxiety my hart races like a racing horse and I'm going to a heart doctor soon my dad is in the army and when he's deployed I always sleep with my mom she has the same problems as me with anxiety and she has visitations so one night when I was asleep in mourn bed I had a visitation and it was not good I was terrified and that's when the real problems started I'm still sacred to tell u the truth it's happening this very second and I typed the up to help w please help I'm mourning right now very badly plea plz PLZ PLZ PLZ help I'm so scared plz don't ignore this

Aug 06, 2014
11 year old with sleep anxiety
by: Anonymous

I'm 11,turning 12 in September and I still can't sleep alone.
I feel like I have a really bad problem with sleeping.
My bedroom is beside the bathroom and last year I had a huge fear of Bloody Mary,that's when I stopped sleeping alone.
I don't really understand it at all anymore,I sleeved fine when I was younger.
Now I'm just scared of waking up and not being at my home or somewhere that I don't know,or not even waking up at all.
Sometimes I really wish not to wake up ever again because I have this problem. I sometimes lay in my bed and think that it doesn't matter if someone hurts me because I don't care anymore,I'm an idiot.
My mum keeps saying that our dog will bark if anyone was there,not that anyone will be there" and my nan says it's stupid,nothing's there. This morning my mum said that if I sleep on my own for a week she will redecorate it all for me and my dad said I would never be able to last a week,I want to prove him wrong but I can't just get in my bed and think it'll all be okay.will it?

Aug 07, 2014
I have the same problem !!
by: Anonymous

Hi , I was 13 in June and I can't sleep without my mum and I pdon't know why but I start to panic and cry when she's not there. I'm really worried there's something wrong with me and I hate having to sleep with her. She does not understand why I have to and is constantly bringing it up and taking my phone off me if I don't. I like independence and I'm fine during the day. It's been a problem since I was old enough to sleep by myself but my mum thought I would grow out of...

Sep 26, 2014
I have the sane problem!
by: Anonymous

I am 12 years old and I can not fall asleep without a tv on and my fish tank light but since my surgery I havnt been able to sleep alone I need my mom to sleep and she doesnt sleep with a tv but im ok with that because I have her beside me but I used to wake upvin the middle of the night to go in my parents room it sucks that I cant sleep by muself but I feel safer and more comfortable

Sep 26, 2014
I am the original blogger, GOOD NEWS!
by: Anonymous

I am the original blogger and wrote about my 13 year old daughter who could not sleep alone. That daughter is now almost 17! Happy to say she sleeps in her own room, no problems whatsoever. We had tried everything, honestly nothing really worked. She just started sleeping in her own room when she was ready, it was around 9th grade.
I will say, I have son who is 13 and he is now sleeping in my room. He started when my daughter started sleeping in her room. However, I know it is short lived and he will sleep in his own room soon. I learned from the first child, it really is not a big deal and they will figure it out. As a parent I just try to be supportive, when they are ready to try and sleep alone I support that and encourage them to keep trying. Eventually it happens!!

Sep 29, 2014
38yrs of age
by: Anonymous

I am a 38 yr old woman and I struggle to sleep alone. At times I wondered why I had a room and a bed . I would go weeks sometimes months without sleeping in my bed. I'm struggling tonight. Trying desperately to pinpoint where this all stems from.

Oct 21, 2014
Personal Story -that doesn't answer the question-
by: tiphany lenk

[Note this is not my real name, I think it's a very cool name though!]
Honestly this is actually very embarrassing since I am now in HIGH SCHOOL. Freshman Year, and I trouble my mum with sleeping in her room. I have my own room, decorated and nicely organized. I really like being in my room. From when I get home from school till 9:00pm. Being a 14 year old in High School and sleeping with her mum is not something you just tell everyone. I do agree with the comment of saying how that person started sleeping alone when they got independent. Mostly because I'm in fact growing independent myself and I want to sleep by myself now. Though I'm too much of a wimp and I still can't manage to sleep by myself. I only recall one memory of me sleeping by myself, which was when I came home around 7 o'clock, sat on the couch and simply just knocked out. >-< This has nothing to do with anything but I need to post it somewhere! "Leaf meh alonz"
I'm just glad I'm not the only child who does this, boost my self esteem so much.. Hopefully I'll sleep alone by the end of 2014.
If not by then, I really have a problem.

Oct 22, 2014
My two cents about growing up with sleep separation anxiety
by: Lizzy

Although I don't know how much use this will be, I thought maybe someone would like to hear form a now young adult who grew up being unable to sleep alone do to extreme separation anxiety would occur when trying to rest. I am currently twenty years old and slept in my parents bed until I was fourteen. I had simillar issues of waking paniced at the idea of being alone. I would make one of my parents go to sleep when I went to sleep regardless of what they were doing. It was so bad that my father was forced to sleep in my room while I slept in their room with my mother. I had become to large for the three of us to be comfortable in one bed. My issues didn't let up until I entered my first relationship. Only then was I able to fall asleep in my own bed because I had him on the other line to talk to. Every night I'd fall asleep on the with him on the other end. Some nights the anxiety would wake me up and instead of frantically looking for my parents, I was dialing his number walking him up in the middle of the night. Time has progressed and relationships have come and gone. I have slowly become more independent about sleeping alone, although the anxiety still disrupts me some nights.

Oct 29, 2014
I cant sleep at night
by: Anonymous

Im 15 and i find it really hard sleeping in the night. Before i go to bed i usually started getting anxious and i ask my parents to stay up until i fall asleep.
Also i cant sleep without the hallway light on and my dad hates it and is trying to stop it but i would just keep turning it back on.
I just wanted to say to people like me, your not alone and that im going badly through this too.
Is their any suggestions which can help me?

Oct 30, 2014
can't sleep alone either
by: A teen girl

Hey ... i'm 15 years old nd next month i m turning 16 years old and i can't sleep alone i still sleep with my mom besides me i m afraid of dark ... afraid of so many things i also get a realky bad dreams which makes me wake up shaking nd screaming so i have no idea what i m going to do because can't even sleep with my sisters in their own rooms so if there's any tipthat could of help me i would lovr to hear it cuz that makes mr a bit awkward :p Thanks ...

Oct 31, 2014
Thank you all!
by: Anonymous

My daughter is going to be 12 next Friday and still in not sleeping on her own. As a parent, I felt that I "failed her" somehow. Now,reading through this forum I am no I am not alone and am motivated to try some of the suggestions that you stated.:) I will keep you posted.

Nov 01, 2014
I'm an 11 year old who can't sleep alone
by: Anonymous

I'm so glad I came across this blog! I've always thought I was a freak for not being able to sleep at night and I always thought I was the only one at this age to still have these problems and I really want to sleep in my own room!!! My mum has got me a new bed and everything redecorated and I feel bad for not sleeping in it...

Nov 01, 2014
I'm an 11 year old who can't sleep alone
by: Anonymous

I'm so glad I came across this blog! I've always thought I was a freak for not being able to sleep at night and I always thought I was the only one at this age to still have these problems and I really want to sleep in my own room!!! My mum has got me a new bed and everything redecorated and I feel bad for not sleeping in it...

Nov 17, 2014
me too
by: Anonymous

Im 12 almost 13. i have the same problem and hate it. Its embarrasing

Nov 20, 2014
ME TOO!
by: Walrus

I am twelve as well and can't sleep in my own bed either. Ever since I was four, I just can't seem to sleep without someone in the room. I just think of all the things that scare me when I am alone and can't escape from it. It has been effecting me and my parents and is very frustrating. We have tried everything from sleep masks to bribing to special herbs and spices. If I do fall asleep I wake up and almost dive into my parents' bed. I don't know what to do, please help me!

Nov 26, 2014
I'm 14 and I don't like sleeping w/o my mom
by: Anonymous

My mom and dad are seperated and have 4 kids. I'm currently 14, my older sister is 18 and in college right now, my little sister is 12 and very independent, my younger brother is 11. Since I was little I was very selfish and I couldn't help it. I got it from my dad. Since my brother was born he never got the same care that I got from my mom. He always wanted to sleep with my mom but I didn't let him. No matter what my mom said I cried and yelled and hit. So he had to sleep with my grandparents. I guess when my mom was with my other siblings I got jealous. After my grandparents left he just slept alone but in the room with my other sisters, while I slept with my mom. Now I'm 14 and even though I want to I can't sleep without her. I mean I fall asleep eventually but it's not good sleep. I cry myself to sleep. I try listening I music but that doesn't work either. I realize how bad of a person I am but I'm trying to change but something inside is stopping me. I don't know what I'm gonna do in college.

Nov 26, 2014
I'm 14 and I don't like sleeping w/o my mom
by: Anonymous

My mom and dad are seperated and have 4 kids. I'm currently 14, my older sister is 18 and in college right now, my little sister is 12 and very independent, my younger brother is 11. Since I was little I was very selfish and I couldn't help it. I got it from my dad. Since my brother was born he never got the same care that I got from my mom. He always wanted to sleep with my mom but I didn't let him. No matter what my mom said I cried and yelled and hit. So he had to sleep with my grandparents. I guess when my mom was with my other siblings I got jealous. After my grandparents left he just slept alone but in the room with my other sisters, while I slept with my mom. Now I'm 14 and even though I want to I can't sleep without her. I mean I fall asleep eventually but it's not good sleep. I cry myself to sleep. I try listening I music but that doesn't work either. I realize how bad of a person I am but I'm trying to change but something inside is stopping me. I don't know what I'm gonna do in college.

Dec 06, 2014
So glad we're not alone!
by: Anonymous

Our daughter is 8 and refuses to go to sleep on her own. She has gone through phases of difficulty over the years but these last two months had been the worst. I feel ashamed to say that I thought she was just being stubborn and got very angry sometimes. After reading this, I realized she is not stubborn but afraid and that I need to be more understanding. Partway through reading this I went into her room (where her dad was laying with her) and asked if she wanted the light on, her relief was palpable. Then I told he that she is not alone and that it's okay. she was surprised, happy and again, relieved. Her dad was able to leave and she fell asleep!! Thank you all or the insight I gained here!

Dec 06, 2014
So glad we're not alone!
by: Anonymous

Our daughter is 8 and refuses to go to sleep on her own. She has gone through phases of difficulty over the years but these last two months had been the worst. I feel ashamed to say that I thought she was just being stubborn and got very angry sometimes. After reading this, I realized she is not stubborn but afraid and that I need to be more understanding. Partway through reading this I went into her room (where her dad was laying with her) and asked if she wanted the light on, her relief was palpable. Then I told he that she is not alone and that it's okay. she was surprised, happy and again, relieved. Her dad was able to leave and she fell asleep!! Thank you all or the insight I gained here!

Dec 25, 2014
My son is almost 13 and cant sleep alone
by: Anonymous

my son has always had this problem since very young. he refuses to sleep alone in his room. my other younger sons are fine.

I am hoping he will eventually grow out.i keep thinking about my younger brother who had the same problem and he eventually grew out of it and now works and stays overseas (ironic hah)

so i keep this in mind and am waiting for the day when this will pass.


Dec 28, 2014
I'm 11 and still sleep in my moms bed
by: Hi

Hi. I'm 11 and have a mental health issue called hight anxiety. I am afraid of the dark. It helps to have my flower night lite on. I go to sleep by my self but at 3:00 in the morning a get up to go to the bath room and can't get back to sleep. So I go to my moms room. Mostly I sleep in my room allnight long now. So parents from a child's perspective it will get better. It makes me feel better to see that other kids still sleep with there parents.

Dec 28, 2014
I'm 11 and still sleep in my moms bed
by: Hi

Hi. I'm 11 and have a mental health issue called hight anxiety. I am afraid of the dark. It helps to have my flower night lite on. I go to sleep by my self but at 3:00 in the morning a get up to go to the bath room and can't get back to sleep. So I go to my moms room. Mostly I sleep in my room allnight long now. So parents from a child's perspective it will get better. It makes me feel better to see that other kids still sleep with there parents.

Dec 28, 2014
I'm 11 and still sleep in my moms bed
by: Hi

Hi. I'm 11 and have a mental health issue called hight anxiety. I am afraid of the dark. It helps to have my flower night lite on. I go to sleep by my self but at 3:00 in the morning a get up to go to the bath room and can't get back to sleep. So I go to my moms room. Mostly I sleep in my room allnight long now. So parents from a child's perspective it will get better. It makes me feel better to see that other kids still sleep with there parents.

Dec 30, 2014
How about the opposite?
by: Lainey

Until I was about twelve or so, my parents had me sleeping in their bed with them. I hated it! For the first seven years, my parents and older brother lived in a one bedroom apartment, with one California King-sized bed. Of course, we all had to sardine ourselves every night, which my brother hated, but I suppose I was too young to notice. When we moved from L.A. to Bend, I figured I'd have my own bed in my own room just like my brother, who was actually 16-17 at the time. We slept with them out of necessity, I thought, but then my parents refused, downright REFUSED to get me a bed for four more years! I felt so ashamed to have anyone over, and I not once had a sleep over. I'm 16 now, so the problem has pretty much gone away, and yet whenever my significant other of a year and three months stays over, I'm forced again to sleep in their bed. I understand they don't want us being horndogs at night or anything, but I'd MUCH rather sleep in my own bed than sneak off to see my guy. It's seriously not worth it to me, I need my sleep, you know. Of course, this isn't the only aspect of my life that my father and Latino mother (much stricter than most moms) are overprotective on. They're quite inconsistent, allowing me to have a boyfriend, and yet holding it over me all the time. Letting my friends come over, but never letting me out of the house besides school. I've never even slept at someone else's house before! This is so frustrating, and I'm wondering what parents who deal with the opposite problem think. I couldn't find any other sites that even remotely touched on this subject, sleeping with parents dad beyond their years(again, I'm in the opposite boat, however).

Dec 30, 2014
How about the opposite?
by: Lainey

Until I was about twelve or so, my parents had me sleeping in their bed with them. I hated it! For the first seven years, my parents and older brother lived in a one bedroom apartment, with one California King-sized bed. Of course, we all had to sardine ourselves every night, which my brother hated, but I suppose I was too young to notice. When we moved from L.A. to Bend, I figured I'd have my own bed in my own room just like my brother, who was actually 16-17 at the time. We slept with them out of necessity, I thought, but then my parents refused, downright REFUSED to get me a bed for four more years! I felt so ashamed to have anyone over, and I not once had a sleep over. I'm 16 now, so the problem has pretty much gone away, and yet whenever my significant other of a year and three months stays over, I'm forced again to sleep in their bed. I understand they don't want us being horndogs at night or anything, but I'd MUCH rather sleep in my own bed than sneak off to see my guy. It's seriously not worth it to me, I need my sleep, you know. Of course, this isn't the only aspect of my life that my father and Latino mother (much stricter than most moms) are overprotective on. They're quite inconsistent, allowing me to have a boyfriend, and yet holding it over me all the time. Letting my friends come over, but never letting me out of the house besides school. I've never even slept at someone else's house before! This is so frustrating, and I'm wondering what parents who deal with the opposite problem think. I couldn't find any other sites that even remotely touched on this subject, sleeping with parents dad beyond their years(again, I'm in the opposite boat, however).

Dec 30, 2014
I'm 11 and terrified
by: Anonymous

Hi, I'm 11 years old and I am extremely terrified to sleep alone. I have slept with my brother in my room with me a few nights in a row but then I stayed up a little later than usual one night because I was watching a movie and when the movie went off, I turned off the tv, and then I was terrified. I was shaking and sweating like crazy and I went downstairs to my parents bedroom and knocked on the door and I was having like a nervous breakdown cuz my parents door was locked. I was terrified at that moment. My mom opened the door and I slept in their bed the rest of the night and my mom went upstairs to sleep with my brother and I slept in the bed with my dad. I cried myself to sleep that night. I tried sleeping in the living room with my brother and he fell asleep and I was scared again. I went into their bedroom and slept in the floor and my mama carried my brother into their bedroom and layed him in their bed. My brother is only 8 and I feel terrible for sleeping in their room. I cried myself to sleep that night too. The only thoughts that we're going on in my head were "I'm sorry" and that is all I could think. Reading these comments really helped me. I have slept in my parents bedroom since I was like two. I feel terrible knowing my eight year old brother can sleep by his self but me, his 11 year old sister who he looks up to, can't. I don't want to let my parents help me. I want to get through this without my parents trying to help me. I will do anything as long as I don't have to go and see some stranger therapist sit there and try to tell me how to get over my fears. I am desperate to sleep in a room by myself. Please help me!

Dec 30, 2014
This is the girl who posted last...
by: Anonymous

Yes this is that 11 year old agin who posted last. (You prolly thought that there was nothing else I could say;-)!) well I do. I have a two story house, my bedroom is upstairs and my parents bedroom is downstairs. I know that all of you people out there who are responding are saying "they will grow out of it" but I don't want to wait for another four or five YEARS to sleep in my room by myself. I am fine during the day, I still kinda feel a bit scared when I go upstairs by myself though, but still, I feel like I am letting my parents down. I feel like they are doing great, they are not bad parents (just to let all you parents out there know that) I feel like I am a bad daughter. I live in a town that is not dangerous at all, everybody knows everybody but there are still moments every now and then that makes me feel uneasy, and I KNOW that people won't just come in and rob us cuz our dogs outside look mean and I feel like they kinda protect us, I can NOT sleep with the tv on. It makes me feel safer, but I can't sleep. I am too focused on what is going on on the screen. So parents out there, you are doing great and you are doing exactly what you are supposed to do (in my opinion) it is just the child. It isn't he/she's fault, it isn't anybody's fault the child is not sleeping in their own. Like me for instance, I have a walk in closet, I am scared of it. I feel that somebody is hiding in it. That is what I am scared of. Your child could be scared of a tree outside the window, or a tall bed that makes them feel uneasy. (I'm also scared of that) maybe you should try sleeping in the room with them in the night and then show them that there isn't anything to be afraid of. My parents don't like sleeping in my room with me. They say it isn't comfortable. I say it is too hot in there. I think it is because I am scared. My mom said that when she slept in there with my brother that night, she was cold. I sometimes have trouble with my stomach so I kinda thought it was my stomach hurting me. But idk. I don't wanna wait for the right time to sleep by myself. I wanna sleep in there like soon. Is there anything I can do myself to make me sleep in my room by myself? And I am also scared to be in a room by myself. It doesn't mater if it is day, or night. I am scared to be alone. I feel like if I'm in my house by myself, somebody is just gonna come in and rob us or something. 😁 can somebody plz help me!!! I am kinda embarrassed to talk to my friends about this. I have talked to one and she is coming over to my house tomorrow night and she PROMISED not to leave me. Some of my other friends still sleep with their parents but I feel like it is different for me somehow. Can anyone help??? I am fine with my friends and my younger sibling. Just not by myself. And TRUST ME, my brother isn't brave enough to take on a robber. 😂 I don't know why I'm scared to sleep by myself and I feel I'm safer with my younger brother. But when they fall asleep, im scared. There is one certain room in the house I'm not so scared in but I would rather sleep in my own room because I would feel better if I did. I was watching this castle (a tv show about crimes and stuff) and this murderer was hiding under the bed and then I was scared to go to sleep. I still am. If I ever grow out of this, I will definitely come to this site and tell about it. I'm afraid that I won't grow out of this and then still be scared when I'm in college and then I wouldn't have a parent to be there with me. (I know that is bad!) I just wanted to come and share this with the parents and show you EXACTLY what it is like from a child's point of view. And also sorry about my wordiness (as my science/social studies teacher calls it)
Love,
That 11 year old

Dec 30, 2014
16 and struggling to sleep on my own
by: Anonymous

Hi, I've been having this problem for years, I think at this point in time though I'm in the transition stage. When i was 2-4ish my arent a would always read me a bedtime story and I think that was it. Then at 4 I had a friend sleeping over, and she got scared and went home( I realize 4 is a very early time to start having sleepovers, but I've only had a problem on one once). After that point in time I think I started regularly going to sleep with my mom and having my dad transfer me out of the bed when he went to sleep. Which was fine with me, at the point im at now I can go to sleep on my own, it just takes much longer. there are times when I panic about the time and go to my dad for comfort. My new thing now though is sleeping with my dogs on the family room couch. So I'm now able to sleep on my own which takes some time, or easily rally asleep with my dogs which my dad doesn't like. What I've noticed though that works for me is having some sort of noise in the background. I always have my fan going when I'm in my room, and if im with the dogs I have the TV going at a very very low volume, just high enough that I have some background music. I also tend to prefer sleeping with the lights on. I think because the lights were always on when I fell asleep in the past. So from my exeperience I've learned that there are certain things which help, and others that don't. I hope this can help the rest of you.

Dec 30, 2014
Me too
by: Anonymous

My child struggled with this for most of her life until she was 11. At first, she slept with us for about 9 years, and then she moved to just sleeping in the same room. When she entered middle school, she felt as though she was ready to sleep alone. The transition went smoothly and she is now an independent sleeper. In our child's case, she liked to snuggle up next to someone always, so we gave her a few stuffed animals. You might just need to wait and see if she ages out of it.

Jan 02, 2015
14 year old granddaughter sleeps with her mother
by: Anonymous

Our granddaughter still sleeps with her mother. Their situation has always been pretty bleak. Her mom has several issues, uneducated, drug user and really has no use for the 3 children she has had. No matter how bad the situation at home, the girl will not leave her mother even to live with her dad who is a long way away. Her brother tried to keep her and every night her mom would call and the girl would be in tears. In my mind, I know she did that so she could go back home with her mom. Just seems like a waste of time to try to help.

Jan 04, 2015
I know her pain.
by: Anonymous

I'm 21, I have a fear of sleeping alone, I've always have. I moved out when I was 19 and up til then I slept in the same bed as my mom, now I have my fiance to sleep next to. When I go back home (I live in Michigan my parents live in Illinois) I still lay with my mom if my fiance doesn't come with. I have to have the TV on (preferably Disney Channel since there are no scary or sad animals commericals) and a nightlight. My fiance doesn't mind it (thank god) and we put a timer on the tv! I'm just really afraid. I never saw a doctor for this and I never will but I get sleep paralysis, I see weird things while I'm awake, I always feel like someone is watching me or is around me, my hairs always stand up on the back of my neck during the day and at night and having someone next to me is very comforting. I've never been to a sleep over and I didn't go away to college, I stayed home and commuted. I've always been so embarrassed about this but I've meet people who are just like me. It truly is a phobia. The reason I'm on here is because my fiance is out of town for work and I only have our dogs.

Jan 04, 2015
I know her pain.
by: Anonymous

I'm 21, I have a fear of sleeping alone, I've always have. I moved out when I was 19 and up til then I slept in the same bed as my mom, now I have my fiance to sleep next to. When I go back home (I live in Michigan my parents live in Illinois) I still lay with my mom if my fiance doesn't come with. I have to have the TV on (preferably Disney Channel since there are no scary or sad animals commericals) and a nightlight. My fiance doesn't mind it (thank god) and we put a timer on the tv! I'm just really afraid. I never saw a doctor for this and I never will but I get sleep paralysis, I see weird things while I'm awake, I always feel like someone is watching me or is around me, my hairs always stand up on the back of my neck during the day and at night and having someone next to me is very comforting. I've never been to a sleep over and I didn't go away to college, I stayed home and commuted. I've always been so embarrassed about this but I've meet people who are just like me. It truly is a phobia. The reason I'm on here is because my fiance is out of town for work and I only have our dogs.

Jan 04, 2015
I know her pain.
by: Anonymous

I'm 21, I have a fear of sleeping alone, I've always have. I moved out when I was 19 and up til then I slept in the same bed as my mom, now I have my fiance to sleep next to. When I go back home (I live in Michigan my parents live in Illinois) I still lay with my mom if my fiance doesn't come with. I have to have the TV on (preferably Disney Channel since there are no scary or sad animals commericals) and a nightlight. My fiance doesn't mind it (thank god) and we put a timer on the tv! I'm just really afraid. I never saw a doctor for this and I never will but I get sleep paralysis, I see weird things while I'm awake, I always feel like someone is watching me or is around me, my hairs always stand up on the back of my neck during the day and at night and having someone next to me is very comforting. I've never been to a sleep over and I didn't go away to college, I stayed home and commuted. I've always been so embarrassed about this but I've meet people who are just like me. It truly is a phobia. The reason I'm on here is because my fiance is out of town for work and I only have our dogs.

Jan 05, 2015
Do I need a ther
by: Anonymous

I'm 13 and I can't fall asleep alone. I cry and sob all night and I don't sleep at all. I have to BEG my mom or dad to sleep with me.

Jan 05, 2015
Do I need a therapist?
by: Anonymous

I'm 13 and I can't fall asleep alone. I cry and sob all night and I don't sleep at all. I have to BEG my mom or dad to sleep with me.

Jan 05, 2015
Do I need a therapist?
by: Anonymous

I'm 13 and I can't fall asleep alone. I cry and sob all night and I don't sleep at all. I have to BEG my mom or dad to sleep with me.

Jan 06, 2015
Please please please help
by: Anonymous

Please can someone help me ;(

My daughter is 8 and since father Christmas coming my daughter has been unable to sleep through the night. It started off with her waking during the night and not being able to go back to sleep but has now progressed to her not being able to go to sleep alone either.

Whilst I am sure she will grow out of it it has meant that she is sooo tired during the day and must be affecting her schoolwork. She is tired and grumpy and has no energy.

Also, and i know this is probably selfish, but as my husband and i only have a double bed there is not really enough room for 3 of us and so we all end up having a very rough night sleep. Her bed is a small single so too small for one of us to sleep in. We have tried her sleeping on our floor but to no avail.

My husband can fall right back to sleep once she has got into our bed but i cant - i just lay there awake and so eventually get up.

We are all sleep deprived and grumpy and i am trying to be patient but I am at my wits end and cant function on such little sleep.

Please can anyone help us?


Jan 06, 2015
Please please please help
by: Anonymous

Please can someone help me ;(

My daughter is 8 and since father Christmas coming my daughter has been unable to sleep through the night. It started off with her waking during the night and not being able to go back to sleep but has now progressed to her not being able to go to sleep alone either.

Whilst I am sure she will grow out of it it has meant that she is sooo tired during the day and must be affecting her schoolwork. She is tired and grumpy and has no energy.

Also, and i know this is probably selfish, but as my husband and i only have a double bed there is not really enough room for 3 of us and so we all end up having a very rough night sleep. Her bed is a small single so too small for one of us to sleep in. We have tried her sleeping on our floor but to no avail.

My husband can fall right back to sleep once she has got into our bed but i cant - i just lay there awake and so eventually get up.

We are all sleep deprived and grumpy and i am trying to be patient but I am at my wits end and cant function on such little sleep.

Please can anyone help us?


Jan 10, 2015
Nearly 14 and CANNOT sleep alone
by: Anonymous

I'm a 13 year old girl, nearly 14. And I can't sleep alone. I'm completely fine when it comes to sleeping with other people in the room or sleeping with friends but I don't like to sleep in my room alone. I don't know why but I think I'm scared of the dark + something bad happening. My heart stops when I hear the house creak or any kind of noise. It's to the point that I will stay up until 3am on my phone with the lights off, freezing everytime I hear something. Is this a kind of phobia? Is it possible to get treatment for it? It scares me to the point of tears almost.









Jan 13, 2015
so glad I found this
by: Brisy Ortiz

wow! incredible how common this is. We have a 12 year old daughter that is experiencing the same thing. My daughter is the middle child of 3. is this some thing that is also a factor with any of you? just curious??
Thanks for starting this blog it does help to know others are experiencing this. I can't wait until its over..

Jan 13, 2015
so glad I found this
by: Brisy Ortiz

wow! incredible how common this is. We have a 12 year old daughter that is experiencing the same thing. My daughter is the middle child of 3. is this some thing that is also a factor with any of you? just curious??
Thanks for starting this blog it does help to know others are experiencing this. I can't wait until its over..

Jan 13, 2015
so glad I found this
by: Brisy Ortiz

wow! incredible how common this is. We have a 12 year old daughter that is experiencing the same thing. My daughter is the middle child of 3. is this some thing that is also a factor with any of you? just curious??
Thanks for starting this blog it does help to know others are experiencing this. I can't wait until its over..

Jan 13, 2015
so glad I found this
by: Brisy Ortiz

wow! incredible how common this is. We have a 12 year old daughter that is experiencing the same thing. My daughter is the middle child of 3. is this some thing that is also a factor with any of you? just curious??
Thanks for starting this blog it does help to know others are experiencing this. I can't wait until its over..

Jan 16, 2015
Help with sleeping alone
by: Anonymous

I used to have some trouble with this when I was younger now I'm 14 but I would say make sure you spend a lot of time with her during the day and then let her decorate her room how she would like it then maybe set up a special time for you and her to do right before bed time for example a snack or a game then have her go to her own room and you should head with her, tuck her in maybe read a book together and give her a toy like a stuffed animal to watch over her in the night. then tell her good night and that you love her and head to your room. This helped me when I was a little younger also when I was put to my room i was to afraid to cross the hall to get to my parents room so it kept me in my own bed room crying and sitting in the middle of my bed holding my stuffed animal but eventually I would just give up and fall asleep then after a while I learned that we were all safe and as long as I had my stuffed animal every thing is fine not to mention I still sleep trough the nights just fine with my stuffed animal.

Jan 22, 2015
Advice?
by: 11 years old!

I am starting to think that I should have my own room!I have stayed with my younger sister for about a year and a half and as maturity is close I think that I should be prepared as in the later times, I am going to have to be more responsible and mature for myself.I have already planned out that I'll start sleeping alone when it is mid year, probably July or August, somewhere along those lines. Even though it will still be a long way to go. I have to start practicing because when there is a free space on my home I will have to move rooms. I want to do this because I will start being more mature and being older means I will gain more stuff to take care of such as looks, work, school and much more so I would like help because the last time I did.It did not work out at all. Please give advice.My idea is to buy some earphones an download music ad just listen to it through the night because I think that would calm me down, also making my room more vibrant and like me, curtains would be changed so it is opaque and neon style so I will feel happy, sleep or be into bed before 9.30 just so I won't stay up all night thinking that I am the only one not asleep in the house and not have to much photos that face me as sometimes it might end up really scary as it will be looking at you.All my friends can sleep with ease and I'd like to as well. I am thinking of meditating or reading a book or just watch a movie before I sleep to calm me down. But I am kind of know about the source of my worries, it may be the emptiness of the space, maybe the odd shadows or just thinking that you don't have a big enough bed (that is sometimes my problem) I wish for anyone to help me with my anxiety and let me know some more advice because it would save my life

Jan 24, 2015
My son is 13
by: HL

My son is 13 and is the same way. He has been this way for a long time but not the early years. Something scared him and that is most likely what happened with your kids.
He sleeps with the light on and the tv on (muted). I turn the light off once he is asleep and the tv too but the remote is right next to him in the event he needs to turn it on.

We also leave the bathroom light on at all times.... trauma in ones life can cause alot of fear of many things.

Just make them feel comfortable and give them lots of love and reassurance. They will be fine.

Jan 25, 2015
Physician
by: Anonymous

You need to take your daughter to a sleep specialist they can help. I have sleep Apnea they helped me very much. Good luck

Jan 25, 2015
Physician
by: Anonymous

You need to take your daughter to a sleep specialist they can help. I have sleep Apnea they helped me very much. Good luck

Jan 25, 2015
Physician
by: Anonymous

You need to take your daughter to a sleep specialist they can help. I have sleep Apnea they helped me very much. Good luck

Jan 25, 2015
Physician
by: Anonymous

You need to take your daughter to a sleep specialist they can help. I have sleep Apnea they helped me very much. Good luck

Jan 25, 2015
Physician
by: Anonymous

You need to take your daughter to a sleep specialist they can help. I have sleep Apnea they helped me very much. Good luck

Feb 10, 2015
Me too
by: Anonymous

Okay, on the Internet, check what she watches. I'm ten I sleep with gramma. If she deletes history, check her cache thing. I watched Scream, Saw, Childs Play, and Jason clips. I thought, so Cool! But then, at night, I thought, oH man, I'm screwed. I slept on an air mattress like yOu by mom, dad was not happy at all but I was scared to death. I finnaly started leveling off but it's going to be a long time until I sleep by myself again.

Feb 19, 2015
My 10 year old has told me why she can't sleep
by:

Briefly - my daughter started not sleeping at 8. We had moved countries twice and homes twice. She fears noises,the dark and her own imagination. She is now 10 and absolutely terrified of sleep time. I either now sleep with her ( Had to buy a Single Kingsize bed so we both fit on) or she also creeps into my bed whenever she awakens. She watched programmes that never affected her as a child, but now they do. These include Dr. who and Merlin.She happened to see 5 seconds of Freddy Kruger injesting a child ( on a school child's iPad at school ! ) and her horrors deepened. She happened upon a hypnosis clip on You Tube that told her to be calm,relax etc. It went silent and then a bloodcurdling scream rang out followed by a clown covered in blood. This shocking affront sent her over the edge as she was alone in her room on her bed, looking for "cute animals" but instead came upon this awful video. She will not sleep. She grips my hands and won't let go. She begs and pleads with me to sleep with her. No matter how much love and comfort I give her she is Never reassured. It worries me so much to see her in so much pain,panic and fear. She does not want medication and panics if I talk gently to her about chatting to a psycologist. Her latest worry is that I am not really her mum and that an imposter has taken me over. My quick solution to this is to have a password that only " mummy " knows and when she starts to worry if it's mum sleeping with her she asks for the password. We now have 3 passwords so that she can be triple sure it's the mum she loves and not someone else. This is all very sad to me. She is like most children on this site, a clever articulate child, popular and sporty. She loves sleepovers at home or away because there is usually a friend in the room with her. I love my child so much and live in hope that these terrible fears will go away soon. She looks so very tired and worn out and she is only 10.

Feb 26, 2015
12 Year old's Problem
by: Anonymous

This has affected me for a while. I have always wanted to sleep with my parents since a young age. I really do not know why sleeping alone bothers me. I need to be in a room with someone. Strangely, being at a friend's house doesn't bother me. Additionally, I am only comforted if I can see someone. I am an only child, have plenty of friends, and am even in a talented and gifted program in my school district. I hope someone can give me some suggestions. Thank You!

Feb 27, 2015
7 Year Old
by: Anonymous

My daughter cannot sleep alone either! She has been sleeping in a cot hear my bed for two years now! She cannot be alone in a room without freaking out either or go to the bathroom without an escort. It has been hard. It is nice to see we are not alone in this that there are a lot of girls out there with the same thing going on. It is just I want the best for her and try so hard to support her. She will ask if it is ok to feel this way and I always say yes it is - completely normal and she will get over it soon. Hoping with love, time and patience this will pass.

Mar 11, 2015
stepmom struggle
by: Anonymous

I'm the stepmom to a funny, smart 9 yr old girl. Also to a 12 yr old boy. He sleeps fine, she, doesn't. Each night for the past 3 1/2 month she refuses to sleep on her own in her room at our house. its quite disruptive to our family if we try to get her to do it, so lately my husband has given into her. He travels for work and often i am left to handle the nightly anxiety. She txts or calls her mother if i tell her she cannot sleep in my room. As with the other blogers, she is fine by day but will not go up to her room to do homework or go to bed. I too have redone her room in hues of color she chose, bought her a desk and made it feel less little girl and more big girl. this has not helped. i am the mother of 21 and 19 yr old boys in college now and never had this issue. as a stepparent, i am faced with the challenge of taking care of but not disciplining my step kids. i am completely frustrated and quite frankly tired of hearing how she will grow out of it. I am held hostage by this child in my own room/house. she is cannot be alone, I'm looking for strategies to help her self sooth. BTW she was a bed wetter up until 8 months ago. are the two related?

Mar 15, 2015
I'm having the same problem
by: Anonymous

Hi,I'm almost 13 and I am constantly awake trying to sleep but, I cant! Right now I have a sore throat and the time here is 12:27 in the morning, I cant sleep in my grandmas room because she doesn't want me to give her any of my germs. I scared something is watching me, And that's just me being paranoid,I keep hearing noises and I'm scared out of my mind,someone, anyone,Please help me!!!

Mar 26, 2015
13 yrs old
by: Anonymous

I'm 13 and often I can't sleep by myself it's horrible.
I have to have someone else in the room or next to me when I sleep otherwise I read until I get sleepy which is usually around 3AM which is definitely not good for my school work.
The reason I can't fall asleep is because I'm scared to be left alone with my thoughts, my thoughts scare me. It sounds really silly I know.
But i deal with a lot of anxiety and I'm often terribly unhappy.
So when I go to sleep at night all the anxiety, worries and misery I felt through out the day suddenly gets shoved on my shoulders and this time I can't push it down. That's why I'm to scared to sleep alone because I'm scared of how my thoughts can impact me.

Mar 28, 2015
i can't sleep alone either
by: Anonymous

im 11 and i feel the same my mom and dad don't get what i am going through they just expect to just sleep but i can't and its really hard to explain to them please help

Mar 30, 2015
16 and I still can't sleep
by: Anonymous

For as along as I can remember I've never been able to sleep alone. When I was younger I always slept with my parents and every time I slept alone I would get so scared I would end up wetting to bed. This went on until I was about 10 and my mother took me to a urologist and I had a closed urethra witch after surgery stopped the bed wetting but I still cannot sleep I always have to have someone with me. Usually I sleep with a friend and I sleep better when they are in the same bed with me but its okay as long as they are in the same room.

Mar 31, 2015
Explanition and Tips
by: Ashlynn (Sortor

She probably has nightmare when by herself, or she is just lonely. You could....

1. get her a pet (a small dog or cat) so she always has a living creature near her

2. buy her a nice realistic doll, or stuffed animal so she don't feel lonely

If that don't help ask her what is the matter, and if she is having trouble at school which is the most likely explantion.

Apr 05, 2015
My 7 yr old brother does this too
by: Anonymous

My 7 yr old brother does this too, it bugs me bc he is 7. I think he needs to sleep by himself but now I see he's not alone in this!(:

Apr 10, 2015
I Feel you
by: Anonymous

Hi there! Like your daughter, i am the top in my class at the moment but I am also like your daughter in another way- i cannot sleep alone. I turned 13 two months ago. I sleep with my mum because of my immense fear. When I try to sleep alone, i feel as though something may be creeping up to me. However, when I sleep with my mum or pretty much anybody I know well, I do not seem to have this problem. Also, even when I am sleeping with my mum, I try to fall asleep before her as I cannot handle being the only one in the house awake. It really scares me. I am so scared that I have not allowed my parents to give me a room, lest they expect me to sleep in it alone. My fears follow me into my daily life as well. Sometimes, I get too scared to even go to another room alone, that too in broad daylight. I also have paranoias about different things. For example, I have a bump on the back of my neck and I am terrified. I do not know if my paranoia and my fear of sleeping alone are connected. Good luck to your daughter in overcoming her fears while I try to overcome my own fears. ☺️

Apr 11, 2015
must read!
by: unknown

Hi I had a terrible past and I can't sleep all I can say is that I am in middle school and can't sleep alone without a sound. I have advice please!!! Do not sleep with them! Try to make noise or give them a little radio and play a whales song or nature song when you sleep with them it makes it worse! One day my mom could not sleep with me and I had to sleep alone for a week. I got used to it once I had sound.but here is the thing my mom sleeped with me again and here I am not being able to sleep. Hope this works!

Apr 14, 2015
This was me
by: Anonymous

I am a 13 year old who slept in my parents bed when I was 5-12 years old. It all started when I was 4 when I saw my dad watching ghost adventures. I found it amusing and got into more ghost shows. Then I started having nightmares and woke up in the middle of the night. When that would happend I would sleep in my parents bed for the rest of the night. Then when my amagination grew in school i though I would see something in the dark. (Ghosts from dads shows). Then I couldn't sleep without someone 5 ft or closer. Also couldn't go into sertain rooms alone (including the bathroom until 9). And I couldn't go in ANY dark place alone till 10. But sleeping alone was hardest. We tried many methods. 1 worked. First try getting him/her comfortable with her bed. (I still sleep with lights on and with a pet) get a matrise and set it next to their bed. Sleep there until they think there ready. Then only stay in their room till they fall asleep. When they are ready sleep on the nearest bed or couch OUTSIDE their room. Finnally then after a few Weaks you can sleap in your bed. And whatever you do don't let them sleep in your room for 1 night until it's been 3 whole weaks if them sleeping alone. Then if they have a bad dream it's ok bc I get scared too still and Ik how it feals.

Apr 14, 2015
Almost 10 year old
by: Anonymous

My daughter is almost 10 and is the same as you all have described. She will not sleep alone or at a friends house. I'm wondering from the older posts (if any still check this site) if your child ever got over their fears and if so what changed?

Apr 23, 2015
I'm 11 years old i sorta have thi issue too
by: The Parellel IDK

I am 11 years old but I don't have this every night but I had it worst when i was around the 2nd Grade to the 4 i'm in 6th grade now but i was fine then but this year, and every now and then it worse than the last one but tonight it was so bad i actually Got paralyzed "I didn't move", until 3AM when my grandfather woke up and I finally moved (Physically. Of course but my stomach stiffened,It felt disgusting,ill, or as if something was eating at my nerves and setting them off or something You know? I end up crying but I don't even make a single noise period,. I've never felt worse in my life Unexplainable way of being alone except I don't like people st all really but I have panic attacks too and yet some how I still manage fake that everything is fine.

Apr 24, 2015
also can't sleep alone
by: Anonymous

I'm a 12 yr old girl and can't also sleep alone.
So I don't sleep on my own room, but I'm allowed to sleep in my sister's room. She's 8 yr old.
I love sharing room with my sister, for i'm terrified of sleeping alone.
The only problem is the bedtime, for my sister needs a 7:30pm bedtime.
My mom says, you don't want to sleep alone, so my bedtime should be adjusted to my sisters bedtime. So I've to go to bed at 7:30 pm already.
But I dare not sleeping alone, so I prefer sharing room (despite the early bedtime) to having to sleep alone in a room at a later bedtime . So I dont have to sleep alone.


Apr 26, 2015
It's only natural.
by: Dawn

People have fears that are beyond explanation and reason. There is not a single person on this planet who isn't fearful of one thing or another.
My 16 year old son suffers from this too. It gets a little taxing at times but I won't kick him out of the bed.
The reason being he and I both need to sleep in order to be well rested for school and work.
I don't know if part of the problem is that he has co-slept with me since he was an infant.
I have in the past seen full on fear in his eyes when it came to nights and being expected to even go down the hallway alone to get ready for bed.
It is heartbreaking to see someone so frightened of something that you cannot make sense out of.
I was afraid of the dark until I was 16 years old and slept with a nightlight. My younger sister slept in the same room in the top bunk while I lay there on the bottom bunk hearing every single noise there was to hear, thoughts racing. My parents only a stones throw away in the next room. I used to have horrific nightmares as a toddler, I am sure this was contributory. I am also a person with a slight connection to things that "normal," people do not understand which always was and is frustrating.
At seventeen, I was no longer afraid of the dark. I was not afraid of the so called boogie man under the bed or in my closet anymore.
I believe learning in all forms is a process and we all learn at our own pace. Don't sweat it, be patient, everything will work itself out in due time.

Apr 26, 2015
It's only natural.
by: Dawn

People have fears that are beyond explanation and reason. There is not a single person on this planet who isn't fearful of one thing or another.
My 16 year old son suffers from this too. It gets a little taxing at times but I won't kick him out of the bed.
The reason being he and I both need to sleep in order to be well rested for school and work.
I don't know if part of the problem is that he has co-slept with me since he was an infant.
I have in the past seen full on fear in his eyes when it came to nights and being expected to even go down the hallway alone to get ready for bed.
It is heartbreaking to see someone so frightened of something that you cannot make sense out of.
I was afraid of the dark until I was 16 years old and slept with a nightlight. My younger sister slept in the same room in the top bunk while I lay there on the bottom bunk hearing every single noise there was to hear, thoughts racing. My parents only a stones throw away in the next room. I used to have horrific nightmares as a toddler, I am sure this was contributory. I am also a person with a slight connection to things that "normal," people do not understand which always was and is frustrating.
At seventeen, I was no longer afraid of the dark. I was not afraid of the so called boogie man under the bed or in my closet anymore.
I believe learning in all forms is a process and we all learn at our own pace. Don't sweat it, be patient, everything will work itself out in due time.

Apr 27, 2015
Sorry for the double post.
by: Daw.

Phones!

May 05, 2015
I'm 17 with this issue
by: Anonymous

I'm a 17 year old girl and I have been going through a tough time recently I've been depressed so I have been asking my mom to sleep with me for the past week. My depression has kind of faded now but I still can't sleep alone and I have serious anxiety when my mom says I have to sleep alone. I have to beg her to sleep in my bed for another night. Don't know what to do :(

May 06, 2015
14 yr old daughter cant sleep alone-we are at rockbottom
by: Anonymous

Not sure where to start as a family of 3 we are all so down at rockbottom today. I cant stop crying. Our gorgeous daughter is now 14, she never slept alone from age 4-12, at 11 we finally got some lotery funded councelling as we werent coping and after 3 months of councelling something miraculous happened and she slept for the first time alone for 1 night, then 2 then 3 before we knew it she was sleeping alone all night, school got better, we were all so much happier. So from feb 2012 until jan 2015 she was fine with the very odd relapse. However weve since jan 2015 weve had massive problems and shes back to how she was, either cant get to sleep, cant stay asleep and needs us with her all night.Her dad has more patience than i and i feel dreadfully guilty the next day. Ive said cruel things to her in the heat of the night and whilst her dad has more patience neither of us react well. We all need to be up at 6 for school and work.School is really impacted by her behavours they know about the sleeping but support has been slow. Its amazing to find this thread and to hear of other teens that have always had the same sleep anxietyproblems but ive noticed all the parents seem stressed but seem to be handling it far better than me. I feel like i have to take time off work for the first time as i cant think straight, im shattered, cant bear the arguements, and worried about the affects on my relationship with her dad as we cant sleep together ever, its either me or him in there. Private therapy is so expensive so we are on the lottery funded one again but been told the list is months to wait. Can anyone help me deal with the situation better than i am, should i just give in each time and sleep next to her for a peaceful life? Weve had neighbours complain and call police because she gets into such a state if u dont give in, we thought 2 yrs ago she had turned a corner we were so proud of her. She cant explain whats changed, shes a confident girl by day but another character at night, i know your replies should rightfully be that she cant help it and to put her first but how do you all then maintain a normal happy relationship with yr other half, we only sleep in the same ged when she has friends around and its clearly now having an affect on or relationship too. That sounds so selfish i know . im just awful to think of me at all but im just being honest...cant cope with it so desparatly guilty, tired and sad for us as the previous 2 yrs were so much better in every respect from school to work. Thanks for listening to me go on. So much respect for the patience you other parents have any tips to control mine gratefully received as my only daughter means so much to me.

May 16, 2015
can anyone fix this problem
by: Daisy7960

Im 10 and I cant go to bed by myself even if im not scared my mum or dad have to sit on a chair next to my bed until I fall asleep. I can sleep at sleepovers but not at home. Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night and go to my parents room and wake them up to go to bed but sometimes they wont even get up and and sit with me. I get really angry and start to cry I keep begging until they come but they never do so I stay up all night tired! Sometimes I even throw a tantrum.
Please someone help I want to go to bed but I cant

May 16, 2015
HELP I CANT SLEEP ALONE!!!!!
by:

HELP! i am 10 and I am so scared to be alone or sleep alone. when my parents leave me alone or sleep alone I just start to shake with fear and I just start to cry like a baby.I have gone to a therapy doctor and it does not help me. I have tried so many ways from stop being scared but none of them worked. when I sleep I have terrible night mares! It always makes me panic, then I just wake up my parents then they get so annoyed. I so afraid that I will not be scared.

May 22, 2015
I never get sleep
by: Anonymous

If ur child is sleeping with you in ur room, she either has a worry at home or at school. For example, Sats. People get worked up and stressed about this. You need to get her to tell u what her worry is or write it down. If she says she gets nightmares, it is also a worry. My child said she heard voices in her head saying that nobody wants her. Is assured of how many people loved her and wanted her and that hey are silly voices. It could be as silly as u want, but it's the child you need to worry about.

May 26, 2015
15 yes old
by: Anonymous

I'm a 15 year old girl and I can't sleep. I can sleep at first (but only when my sister's there), but I wake up often and can't go back go sleep unless my mums there or if I sleep with my sis. It's extremely embarrassing and my grades have been going down. I've got bags under my eyes and I've been taking daytime naps lately to catch up on sleep. I've also been extremely paranoid (seeing things in the corner of my eye, being afraid of my own house). I need help but my parents can't afford professional help. Can someone tell me what's wrong with me?

May 31, 2015
15 and still sleep with my mum
by: Anonymous

When o was 10 I had stared sleeping with them then it got to worst I was molested when I was 13 going to be 14 and I had a bad time telling people a bout it I went to therapy and other stuff then one night my friend pushed me on to doing pot and the it got worst my mum was not mad but disappointed that I have done it but that night I got so sick that I ended up in the er I told my mum that I had done it and it don't help that I was watching sherk is life and sherk is love

May 31, 2015
15 and still sleep with my mum
by: Anonymous

Hello I am 15 and I can say I do sleep with my mum it starred when I was 10 an then it don't help that I was molested when I was 13 going to be 14 the guy was mean to me he was my bb siter and and he beat me and I can't still tell people with out crying my mum knows but I have autism and otherstuf but my friends don't know I have to have my dog that by my side all the time he helps me thew my day

May 31, 2015
Have you tried re-decorating Her/his room or giveing the diffrent places to sleep in their room
by: Anonymous

The problem is the room your child is in. For example is you child's bed against a wall it gives extra security and comfort. Or you could try
Letting your child sleep under her bed by making it more comfortable under there it gives the feeling that nobody can find her/him if your child can't get under the bed then try getting a bed she can get under. I don't think you've noticed but it's mostly girls don't sleep at night don't be shocked about age your child might be going through a hormonal stage of fear or might just Be generally scared sit down and talk about it and ask what you can do to help. In her/his room try to put bright and happy things around the room and depending on what your child is scared of close the door if ur child is afraid of someone hiding in her close the door and together search the room then tuck her in and close the door behind you sometimes it helps to say you'll hear anyone trying to get in. If they have a sibling as an occasional treat let them sleep with them. Remember to always reward your child however old they are.

Jun 01, 2015
12 yr.old son can't sleep alone
by: Rick

My 12 yr.old son will not sleep in his own bed and has to be in our bed at night to sleep. I have asked him what he is afraid of in his room and he has been tell me he keeps seeing our dead neighbor sitting on his bed or standing in a corner. Now this man and our family were very close friends and he committed suicide 2 yrs. ago. Can anyone else relate to a child saying things like this..it really has me worried.

Jun 01, 2015
Same problem and i feel mental ans scared
by:

Hi
I have the same problem. I am 12 years old and I am terrified of sleeping alone. it all started in
2013 after I watched paranormal activity with my cousins. I couldn't stop thinking that something is gonna happen to me. Then I get even more scared because of the chain post on instagram, whatsapp... Now my mum and dad take turns on who is gonna lay with me until I sleep and eventually it turns into a fight between them.The thing is after they lay with and I sleep, I wake up an hour later and go creep up on my mum and dad and sleep on the sofa in their room. the weird thing is I can sleep with my cousins there all one year younger than me or they are older but I cant sleep with my brother he is 4 years younger than me. My mum keeps on saying I have to go to a psychologist but I don't want to remember my childhood to be that I was the kid with mental issues. and my mum and dad keep on pressuring me to sleep on my own and they lock there bedroom door, then I don't know what to do and I stay up till I have to go to school once I even slept through a whole two classes. I also think that my past has something to do with this because I grew up in a very small house and we all slept in one bedroom so I got used to people older than me sleeping with me and I feel like my parents just want to get rid of me and they keep on pressuring me to do something that I am not ready to do!

Jun 01, 2015
There is hope!!!
by: Anonymous

I am 16 years old and went through a very similar phase, and am still struggling with similar anxietys. I have grown up the only girl of six children in a devout catholic family, i have very loving parents and a good upraising. As a small child I was very protected from scary movies and other mature content, which in a way backfired causing me to have anxiety after mildly scarey stories or legends, the biggest one being "Bloody Mary" I originally slept in my parents bedroom, then moved into my eldest brothers for months or longer, finally my parents made me move back into my own bedroom, but I had a very bright nightlight, sound machine, and they took any mirrors out of my room. After a while I realized that the fear was irrational and decided was fine for a while. In the meantime though I had spent a lot of time in the hospital in a great battle with Ewings sarcoma a rare form of cancer, during my time in the hospital I became dependant once more on my parents sleeping with me. At this point my battle continues despite the fact that the disease itself is gone there are many things that remain. I have always been fearfull at night, but there have been many different causes of that fear and bedtime anxiety. The most recent difficulties I have had have been nightmares brought on by medications and frightening memorys. My suggestion to anyone who suffers with a similar difficulty is to first figure out why you are experiencing this anxiety... This may involve attempting to spend the night on your own. If this is not possible try to understand the root of the anxiety the time I do this best is when I am fearing it, lying awake in bed. Some of the many fears I have had are fear of monsters, fire, break ins, murder, demons, Satin, bullies, ghosts, teachers, schoolwork, failing, illness, dying, the unknown, the future, my lack of ability to do what is necesary, lack of money, nightmares, and fear for my life and the lives of those I care about. There are so many things that you can be afraid of, but there are so many things you can do to make it possible to overcome these fears, you just have to first take care of finding out what you fear or why. Some of the things that have helped me that I might recomend you try are if you fear something like monsters, ghosts, and things of that nature (perticularly in younger children) is start by explaing to yourself ( your child) that this is not something that is real. You have to understand that this alone may help little or not at all, but reassureing yourself or the child is the first step. Next try making the space easier to relax in with enough light to see, but not too much that it impairs the ability to get a restfull sleep. Small night lights, glow and the dark stars on the ceiling are good places to start. Also restfull music or lullabys and nursury rhymes played softly in the bedroom can be a good peacefull distraction for any age. A sound machine or sound machine app are always a good option. For things such as fear of someone harming you or your child or fire, first make sure to lock your door to prevent any intruders from having easy access, you may also want to invest in a security system to eliminate any fear of a person harming you or your family. Make sure that you have a good fire detector and carbon monoxide detector and speak with your family about a plan of action in case of fire and making sure children know that with proper precautions and the necessary knowlege of things like stop, drop, and roll, touching to make sure that the wood of a door is not warm before touching the doorknob, and crawling to avoid smoke inhilation are important any when they are prepared fire is not something worth lying awake at night about. Another option that you may benefit from is having an escape ladder in the window for emergencies. For many of the other listed things, I had benefit from praying, making sure to bless my house and bedroom, avoiding things such as ouigi board, and wearing a miraculous medal. Blessing the house nearly rid me of fears of the devil and demons, and when I would fear them I remind myself that I do not allow them any they have no control over me and they fear things as simple as holy water! I just a short while ago began wearing my miraculous medal to bed and went from having nightmares every night to having none at all!!! As far as fears of school, the unknown, and teachers, bullies, and my future I have mainly been relying on talking with my parents, councilor, and trusted friends, and adults. I do not keep myself up at night because of fear of bad grades because I know I will study hard and do my best, and even if I fail if I try my best, I have done all that I can anyway. Some other things I would recomend for anyone having trouble sleeping on their own are melatonin, or other sleep medications, a healthy diet, and a busy schedule, talk with a doctor or therapist about anti- anxiety, anti-deppression, or sleep medication. You can also try sleeping with a pet, or if you don't have one consider adopting, or fostering an animal. If you have siblings consider a bunkbed situation if you really do not feel that you will be able to deal and at some point when you are ready on your own time you may decide you want to move back to your own space. Fear is a terrible thing, with my history I have experienced more pain than many have in 2,3 or 4 times that I have been alive, and I would much rather severe agonizing pain over lying awake at night with extreme anxiety, fear, and panic. Do not push yourself or your child beyond what they can handle, this will only make things worse, fear has to be overcome slowly, by the individuals own choice.

Jun 03, 2015
Tired of This
by: Anonymous

I am more than 19 years old now and I still cant sleep alone...nothing else work for me . I will start to panic and cry every night but as soon as someone sleep with me, everything seems fine..what can I do??

Jun 07, 2015
11 year old daughter still wants to sleep with mum
by: Anonymous

Have just come home from a lovely hoilday were my 11 year old daughter slept with me,mum and since we have been back she will not sleep in her own room.We have had on meny accations had trouble with sleeping in her own room. I am starting to think that I am going mad ,she will come up with anything and everything not to sleep in her room. Making up stories of nightmears, not feeling well etc. she goes to bed ok about 8:30, but she is awake intill 10 ish going in and out of the toilet upto 9/10 times anight. It has got to a point that I have had to get her nan to come around because she gets delirious. Is it time I went to see a doctor ? when I say to her about seeing a doctor she does not want to know.At thise moment in time (1:15 am on 8th June) I am sitting down stairs because I will not give in to her. I am staring to wonder if I am doing the right thing because she needs to sleep.

Jun 07, 2015
11 year old daughter still wants to sleep with mum
by: Anonymous

Have just come home from a lovely hoilday were my 11 year old daughter slept with me,mum and since we have been back she will not sleep in her own room.We have had on meny accations had trouble with sleeping in her own room. I am starting to think that I am going mad ,she will come up with anything and everything not to sleep in her room. Making up stories of nightmears, not feeling well etc. she goes to bed ok about 8:30, but she is awake intill 10 ish going in and out of the toilet upto 9/10 times anight. It has got to a point that I have had to get her nan to come around because she gets delirious. Is it time I went to see a doctor ? when I say to her about seeing a doctor she does not want to know.At thise moment in time (1:15 am on 8th June) I am sitting down stairs because I will not give in to her. I am staring to wonder if I am doing the right thing because she needs to sleep.

Jun 08, 2015
I have the same problem
by: Anonymous

I'm 12 years old and I have the same problem. It gets really annoying because I'm really crabby and I talk back to my mum when I sleep on me parents' room. I'm afraid of different things every time. One time it will be that someone is going to break in or there is going to be a fire and I will sleep through it. Other times I feel like here is someone else In the room with me and I get really scared and can't go to sleep. I'm currently sleeping on a foam pad on my parents floor and it's not uncomfortable but I would like to sleep in my room. I'm just glad to know that I'm not the only one who has this problem.

Jun 10, 2015
Help
by: Anonymous

Hi I'm 11 and I can't get to sleep in my own bed every night I sneak into my mums bed and try to get to sleep before she gets to bed so I can stay in there but whenever I do I feel so selfish. But I can't help it every time I try to sleep in my own bed every noise makes me visualize someone breaking into the house but it's only in my room it started ever since my parents broke up i also get very scared of being murdered I've had a few occasions where i've gotten so scared I've screamed the house down even in my mums bed I hope someone can help cause I've searched this up and they always say get a counselor but if anyone found out at my school I would get teased and whenever try to tell mum she says I'm making it up in my head and that I need to try sleeping in my bed the strange thing is is that this only happens at places I'd lived at for a long time I also think that a dream I had when I was 4 might've started this but I'm not sure

Jun 18, 2015
I NEED THE SLEEP
by: Anonymous

hey im 11 and I'm to sacred to even close my eyes and I'm not falling asleep untel every one in my home is up what can I do to fall asleep?plz

Jun 22, 2015
I had similar problems.
by: Anonymous

For almost as long as I remember, I would sleep with my parents. At the house I used to live in before I was 5, I always slept with my dad. I was scared of my own room. Heck, I was still scared of the room I would sleep in with my dad! A lot of cars would pass by and leave creepy shadows around the room. I did feel more comfertable with him there with me though.
After I turned 6 and we moved, my mom decided to make a chart to help me sleep on my own. Every night I would sleep in my room, my mom would put a sticker on the chart. If I slept in my room for a whole week, my mother would buy me a toy. This worked for about a year. Later though, I used to be TERRIFIED to sleep on my own. I thought that a monster was staring at me, or a murdurer would break in the house. Sometimes I even thought there would be an alien trying to look at me through the window! My fear of sleeping by myself got to the point where I would have wet dreams and I would beg to sleep in my parent's room. They tried locking their door so I could not come in, but I would just bang on the door and cry until they would let me in.When I turned 12, I got more embarrassed to sleep with my parents because I thought that they would consider me weird. I can sleep in my own room now (I'm only 13 years old), but I NEED to have the TV on. I usually need it on a kid's channel too so nothing weird or scary can come on. I always also use a night light and close my closet door. I still don't get much sleep due to unrelated anxiety, but over all I am getting better. I still get scared, but I no longer need my parents to stay awake so I feel better falling asleep, or having me sleep with them. From personal experience, it really stinks. It was also embarrassing when parents would sit down and talk to me about it during the day. Sorry if this was kind of random, I just wanted to share my story.
P.s. Sorry for any typos

Jun 23, 2015
I think i can sole this problem
by: Anonymous

hi im almost 13 as well but my two younger cousins and i myself have had this problem ( saddly im the only one now) both of my cousins faced their fear but they dont know how they did! I was thinking through on how they did face this problem and relized that its possible that they can sleep because the way their room is... Dont understand? Well, what im saying is that my cousin ( 1 year younger than me) moved to a new house and got a new room ( are you seeing what im telling you now)! My other cousin (2 yrs younger than me) switched rooms with her older sister and sleped fine like my other cousin. So what im saying is that if you let your daughter change her bed room so that she feels comfortable in it she can face her fears! Just let her choose what and were to put her stuff it is hers also let her put her bed in a spot she wants because then it might feel more safe to her.

Jun 23, 2015
I have a way to fix this and seems to work
by: Anonymous

hi im almost 13 as well but my two younger cousins and i myself have had this problem ( saddly im the only one now) both of my cousins faced their fear but they dont know how they did! I was thinking through on how they did face this problem and relized that its possible that they can sleep because the way their room is... Dont understand? Well, what im saying is that my cousin ( 1 year younger than me) moved to a new house and got a new room ( are you seeing what im telling you now)! My other cousin (2 yrs younger than me) switched rooms with her older sister and sleped fine like my other cousin. So what im saying is that if you let your daughter change her bed room so that she feels comfortable in it she can face her fears! Just let her choose what and were to put her stuff it is hers also let her put her bed in a spot she wants because then it might feel more safe to her.

Jun 24, 2015
16 years old.
by: Anonymous

Hi so I am a 16 year old, regular teenager who enjoys being alone during the day. But at night time, I hate hate sleeping by myself. I don't know what is wrong with me but I still sleep with my mom. My dad sleeps in my old room as my mom gets annoyed with his snoring. I experience panic attacks and start crying when I am forced to sleep in my own bed. It is embarrassing when my cousins talk about it and when my family talks about it amongst each other. I've come to the conclusion this could be some sort of anxiety disorder, but I don't know which one specifically. I need help, I've become hopeless. Any advice on what to do?

Jun 26, 2015
15 and filled with anxiety
by: Anonymous

I have a very similar experience. I'm 15, and still have troubles sleeping in my room. I hear things or my brain makes me think so. If I hear any creeks or noise from our house I freak out. This has been going on probably since I was 13. So for two years it's been a battle between no sleep, or either sleeping on my parents floor or with one of them in the bed. My parents have recommended therapy, but this whole situation is soooo embarrassing and no one but my family and best friend know about it. I get terrible anxiety, and I don't think my mom understands it. If I can fall asleep in my room, I wake up at 2/3 in the morning or later depending on the night, and then being unable to fall back asleep unless I go
wake up one of my parents, or go sleep on their floor after someone has calmed me down. My dad is more understanding, and will sit with me in my room, till I calm down. But my mom gets easily frustrated and just ends up going to bed, leaving me scared and alone. Then I find myself looking up solutions on Google, and crying. To any parent who's child is going through this don't pressure the kid to do things, and you need to understand this is hard for you kid too so have some patience. This isn't easy for them either, and if anyone has any ideas on how I can sleep through the night, or get better sleep please tell me. Because I'm sick of sitting in my bed for an hour, with awful anxiety and crying myself back to sleep. Please help :(

Jun 29, 2015
my daughter used to sleep by herself now she will not need some advice to get her back in her room
by: ashley

She is 11 and she has pretty much slept in her room by herself. Now she does not to be alone she will fall asleep in my room and not get up.she will tell us that she is scared. We have know idea what scared her and what is the problem. Need a little help..

Jul 02, 2015
Help
by: Cats

I am 10 I can not goto sleep alone for more then 1 hour I don't know why I am going to5 grade I just get scared of everything all of the sudden alone I can stay over my friend house and I will be fine but not at home my parents said at lest 2 a week but plz help

Jul 02, 2015
What happens in early to mid 20's
by: Anonymous

This thread has helped me be a little more understanding to my stepdaughter's plight. She is well on her way to being in middle school and still having to have her mom sleep in her bed with her every single night. This has taken a tremendous toll on our relationship and her mother does not want to take action to improve the situation and recently it has actually gotten worse. She has gone from having her mother in the bed with her all night 3 or 4 nights a week to now all or all but one night per week she is with us (she is with her dad maybe one night every two weeks, if that).

I am concerned about the repercussions of this behavior as she gets into adulthood. This is clearly an anxiety issue that isn't being handled in the best way. My brother dealt with similar issues as a kid and I believe their coddling him has greatly impacted the depression, anxiety, and inability to leave my parents home (or get a full-time job, he is 26) he experiences. I do not want the early 20's depression that this generation faces once they hit the "real world" for my step daughter.

Has anyone who dealt with this until their pre-teens and teenage years that is now older can please give me some advice on how to help the situation? Is there a relationship between this behavior and any issues you may have had as you got older?

Thank you

Jul 02, 2015
A little advice
by: Anonymous

As someone who used to suffer from horrible insomnia (I have gone through several periods of my life where I have not slept for up to 6 days at a time) I wanted to offer a some advice that got me through it. I now sleep normally with no medications ( taking ambien is not a long term solution and was in fact the worst thing I was doing to myself).

-Don't use your tablet, phone, computer before bed or after you wake up and can't go back to sleep. I put a radio on instead (npr and sportstalk helped me, just hearing people talk allowed me to not focus on my thoughts).

-Notice your sugar/caffeine intake. Limit this stuff after 5pm, it makes a difference

-Recognize that your sleep anxiety is 100% controlled by you. I used to get so angry and frustrated about not being able to sleep I found myself in a perpetual cycle of anxiety and insomnia and I had to accept that I needed to change my behaviors and attitudes about sleep if I wanted to improve.

So here is what I did and I made a commitment to myself to try this for 30 days (it took less than 2 weeks to work for me and has worked for 8 years now) in the summertime where I did not have class or have to work early the next day.

1) Follow the guidelines above
2) I laid down every night before midnight with the mantra that "this is my time for rest, even if I do not sleep this is my time to rest". I would lay down with the mindset that I was resting not sleeping.
3) I set an alarm and woke up to it everyday
4) I made sure to get some exercise everyday (even if it was just 10 pushups and some situps in my room)
5) On nights where I absolutely couldn't sleep and got restless I didn't panic. I used that time to do something productive, either read a non-fiction book or wrote but no matter how little sleep I got or if I didn't sleep at all I still got up for my alarm (which is when I then exercised).

NO NAPS! This throws off your sleep schedule, do what you need to do to get to your normal bedtime but remember to watch the caffeine.

The person who told me to do this said "your issue isn't with sleep, its with the frustration and anxiety of the issues in your life, including not being able to sleep. Your body needs rest, if you follow this routine your body will sleep without your mind getting in the way."

And he was right. The first few days were miserable but my body started winning over my mind and I was able to conquer my insomnia without drugs.

It's not easy, it takes discipline and commitment but nothing worth doing ever is.

Good luck! I hope this can help someone the way it helped me.


Jul 04, 2015
It stinks :(
by: Shuisubhshuibdbhiuiduhbhidbu

I'm 11 , And I can relate what she is going through. My parents are divorced and I switch each week. My mom and I have always been close she would cuddle with me but then she just got remarried and everything changed. I barely new him I think I only saw him once before they were engaged? But I am kinda close with my dad we don't really cuddle or anything. My brother is 14 and he pretty much is always in his room and he isn't really there for me. But now when my step dad come ( he barely comes because he is always working aka traveling) and she will always be smoking with him and I feel left out and I hate sleeping on my own because I get nightmares or hear noises or most of the time something is bothering me. Some advice Is if she says she has nightmares you need to know what there about. And sometimes us kids will just cry there self to sleep ;(

Jul 05, 2015
10 year old son still sleeping with me
by: Anonymous

Thanks to "a little advice" a couple of days ago...I'll talk to my son about your suggestions!

Jul 06, 2015
I Can Relate
by: Anonymous

Hi I am almost 12 and I can't sleep alone at night. Sometimes when I was younger I could sleep alone but I would have creepy dreams and almost always wake up. Now I just can't. I have to sleep with someone. It has almost always been my grandmother or mom. We tried when they would lay with me until I fell asleep but I would always wake up in the middle of the night, go across the hall to my grandparents' room and wake her up and take her to my room. I would always be so freaked out when I woke up and I would spend a few minutes trying to calm myself down but then fear would just overtake me. Did I mention what I was afraid of? It started out with ghosts, then clowns and creepy dolls (I am still scared of them), and now for a year I have been afraid of the stuff in Paranormal Activity. I didn't know that it would be scary I just did it since my neighbors said it was good (REALLY BAD DECISION). And now I am even more terrified.
I feel so embaressed and I can't tell my friends because I am scare that they will think I'm weird and then betray me and tell everyone and make fun of me especially since it's a little weird that I 95% of the time sleep with my grandmother. I just say "this is my room" and just pretend I sleep alone like normal people do. I really WANT to sleep by myself but I'm to scared. My family is comepletely normal and my parents live together and get along fine. I go to a good school and get straight A's and do above grade level classes. I'm going to middle school this fall and I would love to have this problem over by then. PLEASE HELP!!!! Its making my childhood miserable. :(

Jul 06, 2015
I can relate advice
by: Anonymous

This is in response to "I can relate" above.

I understand the frustration you are feeling with this issue. It is very natural for someone to be scared the night after viewing a scary movie. However, it is not healthy to have these irrational fears take over your life.

I think your persistent fear at bedtime has nothing to do with dolls, clowns, or scary movies. I think these are just the ways your mind expresses other stresses you have in your life. I think you may have nailed it in your post. You are concerned that your friends would make fun of and betray you. A lack of confidence in yourself and the people around you may be getting at the heart of the real problem. This lack of self confidence messes with people in a lot of ways. Some smoke, drink, over eat, and in your case it makes you scared of things you know you shouldn't be.

I know at a young age it's hard to rationalize and understand these types of problems. There is nothing wrong with asking for help. Maybe you can ask your parents to speak to a counselor who is trained in helping kids? You only get one chance at life and it makes no sense to not do everything you can to make it as enjoyable as it can be.



Jul 09, 2015
Help
by: PinkPhoenix

I am 11 and I have been sleeping in mum dads room, on the floor, for the past years or more all because I cannot fall asleep in my own room, when I lie in bed my heart starts beating fast and I start to panic. A couple of months ago I went a friends sleepover and still I panicked, but my friend mum told me her son went through the same thing and that he could only sleep on the floor but still that didn't make me feel any better. Does anyone have any suggestions for how I can calm myself down when I get into bed?

Jul 12, 2015
Sleep anxiety
by: Anonymous

Hi, I'm 12 nearly 13, I can't sleep in my own bed it freaks me out just thinking about it. Sometimes I think it's because u hate scary things so I think there out to get me. I have been sleeping in my mums room ever since my dad has gone. I really don't know what to do anymore I have tried everything, going to bed before my mum, taking something if hers to bed everything, I need help in which to solve this problem, it's embarrassing, PLEASE HELP!!!

Jul 13, 2015
Same
by: Anonymous

I am 10 and I can't sleep by myself without my mom by my side. The only time I can sleep at a friends house is if I know them really well. It is 12:15pm and my mom won't sleep with me tonight so I can't fall asleep. I feel like I am going on the same path as your daughter. I am terrified that while I am in high school I will still not be able to sleep without my mom. I need help too. zzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzz

Jul 15, 2015
Tierd
by:

hi I'm 13 and I have the same problem as your daughter. I can't sleep at night unless I'm with someone. I need sleep someone help me!! 😢😔

Jul 16, 2015
Not sure what to do
by: worried mom

My daughter who is now 17. Just went through a pretty major event that she will not seek any help with or talk about. But one thing is for sure is she is suffering from the after trauma. She won't sleep by herself. She will end up staying up later Doing whatever she wants then when it's bed time she will sneak into our room or her sisters and sleep on the floor. The one night she didn't do ether of that she just stayed up all night by herself. We don't want to force her to do counseling but this is getting it of hand. She also can't be in crowds (with or without us) or left alone in public even if I am in eyesight away. Should we force her to do something she absolutely doesn't want too..? Every time her father and I try to talk her through it it's like she shuts down and will say anything she can just to get out of the conversation... I'm worried.

Jul 16, 2015
Can't Sleep In My Own Room At Night
by: Anonymous

I am 12 and I really wish I could sleep in my own room. I did last year for a few months. I was able to fall asleep by putting Duck Dynasty, The Hunger Games, or Catching Fire on the television. However, my television broke. Eventually my parents moved my room into the upstairs, and I would be the only one sleeping on that floor. I am up there all day and I'm not afraid to be up there in the early morning. I can easily stay the night at friends houses and have them stay at mine. But the thing that started to scare me about the upstairs was that it is an old house and my room is the most at risk of a fire. I can't sleep up there unless I am with a friend. I think that I may have aniexty over fire or something. I promise you that it is not because of my addiction to The Hunger Games. I have always been afraid of this. It used to be at friend's houses too but it went away after I met my best friend.

Jul 24, 2015
i can't sleep and I'm scared of demons and spirits
by: Scared

Im 11 and I can't sleep I feel like there is something around me I always relax and look around the room I see shadows and the wind moving the blinds and I freak out I always fake being sick just to sleep next to my parents I always wana chuck a tantrum and cry once I put my fingers all the way through my mouth to vomit just to act sick and sleep next to mum and dad I don't know what to do and when it's gonna stop

Jul 25, 2015
I Also Have This Problem
by: Krystal_Delgado

I cannot sleep by myself either. I cry and panic when someone is not there next to me. I'm never scared during the day, or when someone is around me. I am scared of fake things like creepypastas, and the things I see in horror movies, everyone says "it's not real" I know that, but somehow I still get scared! What's strange is when I was little I could sleep alone, and I'm older now, and I can't sleep by myself. I just want to sleep peacefully. Please help me.

Jul 29, 2015
Same problems
by: same problems

There must be a gene responsible for fear and anxiety :). After I got married I really had troubles if my husband felt asleep before me. All kind of fears and thoughts ran through my mind. Of course I tried to control myself, not to bother him. When I first got pregnant he started reading to "the baby" Gelsomino in the country of liars by Gianni Rodari and other stories, I used to get asleep very easily and I still do many years after that. Even he envies me. :)
Now I have this issue with my second child. He is 8 years old. I carried him in a sling and breast fed him for a very long time. I think it is imprinted in his brained that he physically needs to stay with his hend on my belly. By the time he was 3 he used to fell asleep easily, no reading, no nothing. Then kindergarden started at 3 and he got anxious about the next day. So he is 7 by now and he falls asleep the last. He creeps into my bed after I fall asleep , hugs me and then he can relax and sleep in a few minutes. We used to carry him in his room during each night a few times but it's exhausting and he always comes back. Sometimes I lock my door when I'm badly in need of a good sleep. I can't help him with his insecurities otherwise then hugging him. He is very wise, but sensible, although he doesn't like talking about his fears. And he is very proud if sometimes he sleeps in his room or with his sister. At least he thinks so, because for sure we carried him during the night back there.
I think these children, they want to sleep in their rooms, because they see it annoys the parents but they can't find enough strength in them to do it. Maybe shouting and wiping their ass like recommended above would solve the parents problem and make them sleep alone but the kids will continue to feel bed until they solve the problems with they will by accident find a method which will help by themselves.

Jul 29, 2015
Help!
by: Anonymous 12 year old

I have been reading through the comments and I noticed they are very similar to mine. I haven't been able to sleep on my own for about 8 months, ever since my parents split and we moved house. The first night I slept with my mum as I was scared of the new house. This carried on for about a week, until I finally slept alone. This lasted for about a month and then I haven't been able to sleep alone since except for the odd night about every 4 months. In total I've slept alone in my new house for about a month and two days. I'm starting to get self conscious because I feel like a baby. I really want to sleep on my own but I don't know how. The things that scare me the most is noises. We live in a terrace house so I hear doors creeking open and occasional a smash of a plate. I start off in my own bed but as soon as I hear a noise I'm like a bullet into my mum. I'm also scared because I feel like I'm the only one awake because my mum goes to sleep at the same time as me . What should I do?

Jul 29, 2015
some help for HELP! above
by: Anonymous

The problem you have is a very common one for children of divorce. The sudden change that is being forced on you is not easy to handle. Think of your fear as more of a reaction to all this change rather than just being afraid of some weird noise. My suggestion would be to talk to your mom and dad about how you're feeling, not just about sleeping but the divorce and the changes in general. You will feel better to get those feelings out, and your parents will probably be happy to talk with you since they are probably having a difficult time with these changes as well.

As far as sleeping alone goes, you can do it! You know what those sounds are, and they're nothing to be afraid of. Read above not too far for some ideas on how to get your mind to relax at bed time (they helped my son and myself). Challenge yourself to stay in your bed for one night. Even if you have to turn the light on or stay up reading, make yourself do it. You will eventually fall asleep and you will have accomplished something in battling your fear.
Good Luck!

Jul 29, 2015
Thanks for the advice!
by: Anonymous 12 year old

Thanks for the advice! Im going to try it!

Jul 31, 2015
12 Year old boy
by: Michelle

I can totally relate to your concern about this. My son is 12yrs old and use to sleep in our bed until he was 7yrs. Then moving him to his own bed, I use to have to sleep alone side him. If he woke in the night, he would panic and run to our room and slowly slide into bed with us. I use to wake up and walk him back to his room and sleep next to him in his bed just so he would get a good night sleep as I was worried that he wouldnt get enough sleep to concentrate at school the nexy day.

He now sometimes goes to sleep in his own bed but all the lights have to be on and if he wakes in the night he still comes into our bed.

I dont mind him coming into our bed, but I worry that he is having broken sleep.

Ive tried night lights, playing relaxing music, lying with him until he falls asleep, then moving to my bed. He doesnt even want to go to his room on his own to go to bed.. we have to walk him up to his room. andI can tell you know.. he is not comfortable knowing that he will be alone asleep in his bed.

Can 12yr old get hypnotized at all to get to the bottom of some deep dowm fear?? or will it or is it wrong to do that at such a young age.??

councelling sessions that we have had for his anxiety dont do much.. i have tried.

Please let me know people, if hypnotheraphy would or could work???

what have you tried for your daughter so far??

Michelle

Aug 04, 2015
My nine year old sis.
by: Anonymous

My sister cannot sleep by herself. She is nine. I am worried, and I'm only eleven. She cries when she doesn't go to sleep with someone. I have to let her sleep in my room although she got her own room. The only way she falls asleep is if she knows I'm coming, but I am still awake doing a project or something.

Aug 05, 2015
I am having problems sleeping to
by: Cruzzer

Hi I am 12 about to 13 in 1 month and I can't sleep alone I am terrified! I will start to have panic attacks and right now I am in my own room typing this being very scared and nervous my mom says that I will be fine and just try to sleep. Well what she doesn't understand is that it's super hard to sleep infact I don't sleep at all unless I'm sleeping with my mom. And I just want to be able to sleep in my own bed my own room but it's to hard!!! What do I do😭😭

Aug 06, 2015
There's hope!
by: Anonymous

My parents got divorced when I was barely 2 and ever since then I had been sleeping with my mom, even after she remarried (and then divorced). Recently, I came back into contact with my father (who lives in another state) and after a couple of visits, I asked for my own room-- partly because my sister is 18 and would stay ouT all night and I didn't want to annoy my brother. Anyways, I had arranged to stay the entire month and I slept in my own room all throughout the night the entire visit and when I returned home, I no longer felt the need to sleep with my mom like before. I used to HAVE to sleep with her, have atleast a hand touching her back or something, and wouldn't sleep unless I was with her. I would lay in my own room, with a lamp on, the TV, everything and would be petrified of something "coming to get me." I was embarrassed and hated My fear because I was in high school and knew I should be sleeping in my own bed. as a desperate attempt, I started taking 2 pills of Wal-Som (sleep-aid)every night. After my return, I started sleeping with my dog and leaving the TV on, which helped a lot. I still take my medicine because of a mix of insomnia (and I have inherited depression, along with anxiety) But I can sleep in my own bed and have grown out of the habit. I still have nights where I sleep with my mom, because it brings comfort and a bit of routine, but at age 15, I can now sleep on my own.

Aug 06, 2015
Can't sleep at my dads house!!!
by: Anonymous 13 year old

I was just reading the comments and noticed that some people have the same problem as me. My parents are divorced and I sleep fine at my moms, but when I go to my dads I can't sleep unless I sleep in his room, which makes me feel like a baby. I've never had this problem until now which is what confuses me. I have to take medicine every night in order to sleep but it sometimes doesn't work. I have a regular bed at my moms and a lift bed at my dads and I don't know if that is part of the problem. I now have to sleep with a sound machine, my clock facing away from me, and the door cracked and it sometimes helps but I still don't sleep. This problem now bothers my dad and makes me nervous to go to his house. I think part of the problem is that I have a fear of throwing up and with the loft bed I'm nervous that I can't get down and will be trapped while being sick. I don't know though😣😣. Anybody have any advice?

Aug 07, 2015
I had the same promblem.
by: Anonymous

I still slept with my parents until I was 11 years old when finally my mother gave up she would just make me get out and how I got over it was by the first few weeks I would just sleep with a big doll and pretend it was my mom after that I just got used to my room. but I still don't like being alone if my moms in the living room so am I would like to get better at that.
I was about 12 when I could sleep anlone with out the doll

Aug 11, 2015
My 10 year old is having panic attacks about sleeping alone!
by: Anonymous

When my daughter was 6 or 7 she was just fine and even had sleep overs. Then she went to a friends house and the mom made everyone go to sleep and my daughter was petrified to sleep over at her friends house. After that, I assured her that she never had to go to sleep - just be in her bad. This was definitely helpful. Through the years, however, it hasn't gotten better and only has escalated. At first, though, she could sleep her bed, but just couldn't sleep at others or have others sleep here. Over the past weeks, it's turned into a major panic attack out of no where. She now can't sleep without me and in the afternoon starts talking about it. She feels like a freak - even the majority of her friends are at sleep away camp. She knows this isn't an option for her. I've assured her there are tons of people that go through this and it will get better, maybe not tomorrow,'but it absolutely will! Tonight we are trying something new. I will tuck her in and leave for 10 minutes. Then I will come back for a few minutes. Then I will leave again for 10 minutes. Ultimately, I will sleep in her room. But, hopefully, a "plan" of some sort will make her feel progress. Even if it's just slightly. This intensity, this panic is so new and so hard for her. I've had panic so I know how it feels. I hope this will get better day by day so her confidence builds. I just want her to know its okay😜

Aug 17, 2015
Maybe this will help you with your Child not Sleeping at Night by Themselves
by: Anonymous

Our 9 year old daughter is also having problems with anxiety and not being able to go to sleep without her mom or I sleeping by her side. I have been searching for help on this matter and came across this help (see link below). I plna to try it out over the coming days and weeks and will let you know if it works for my daughter. I though that maybe it would help others out there with similar problems of child not being able to sleep by themselves at night.

http://ogradywellbeing.com/resources/articles-and-links/child-sleep-alone-snoozeeasy-program-scared-kids/

Thank you!

Sep 06, 2015
CANT StLEEP
by: Anonymous

Hi, Im 13 turning 14 in a month, and I have had these problems since I was 5. I have had professional help but still cant find a solution. I bring my mattress into my brothers room as I cant sleep. When I'm on my own I can often cry myself to sleep, and there have been occasions when I thought there was something in my room and I told it to go away. I am scared to go to sleep and I often wonder of what I'm actually scared about but i dont even know what Im scared of.

Sep 07, 2015
Can't sleep in my room
by: Anonymous

Hi I'm 13,I will be 14 this month, and I can't sleep in my room. I don't know why but I'm just afraid of my room. I can sleep in my parents room, on the couch, or in the media room but just not my bedroom. Now my parents are mad at me and saying I need to sleep in my room because it's the biggest and other stuff which just makes me feel bad. I was in one other bedroom in our house but I felt claustrophobic so they let me take a bigger one. I have anxiety which contributes to it. Even though my younger sister is bipolar, depressed, and has sensory issues and they let her do anythingon but don't get that I just can't sleep in there because I'm afraid and cant help it. They call me selfish all the time for different things and it just makes me worse...

Sep 09, 2015
My daughter is 9
by: Anonymous

Im glad to know im not alone. It's become so stressful lately. My baby is 9. Shes been sleeping in her own room and bed since she was 5. These last few months have been really hard. She refuses to sleep alone. All she can say is she doesn't want to be alone.

Sep 10, 2015
to "My Daughter is 9"
by: Anonymous

A sudden change like that doesn't happen in vacuum. You need to start digging and talking with your daughter about the challenges she's dealing with (beside sleep issues). I am a firm believer that these sleep issues are just manifestations of problems in other areas of our lives. The sensation of not wanting to be alone is coming from somewhere. As someone who has conquered their own sleep issues and dealing with their stepdaughter's, it is better to get to the root of the issue now than to let it snowball. She is 13 and her inability to try and sleep on her own (and her mother's inability to try to do anything about it) has caused havoc in our relationship and our ability to get a peaceful night's sleep.

Sep 13, 2015
Help NEW
by: Anonymous

I am 11 years old i can't sleep alone. My parents don't understand and care about me. I feel like dying because they say that only babies sleep with their parents. My dad and mum take turns to sleep with me. PLEASE HELP ME

Sep 14, 2015
11yo still sleeping with parents NEW
by: Anonymous

We have tried psychology, meditation, relaxing, she was a fantastic baby and slept on her own and one day 5 years ago it just went down hill. We are exhausted. We took her to sleep specialist and she had a sleep study. She wasn't sleeping and suffered from a sleep apnea disorder.
It was also suggested the tonsils and adenoids are operated which we did and it had improved. She has always had anxiety relating to the dark and sleep. we have changed her bedroom made it so quaint, we bought her a reborn doll nothing has worked.
We are both tired, she just wants to sleep with one of us now and we take turns so we can all get a great night sleep.
Ouch!
Appreciate any suggestions, feedback on what others have done with a positive outcome
Thank you

Sep 14, 2015
A little advice NEW
by: Anonymous


A little advice
by: Anonymous

As someone who used to suffer from horrible insomnia (I have gone through several periods of my life where I have not slept for up to 6 days at a time) I wanted to offer a some advice that got me through it. I now sleep normally with no medications ( taking ambien is not a long term solution and was in fact the worst thing I was doing to myself).

-Don't use your tablet, phone, computer before bed or after you wake up and can't go back to sleep. I put a radio on instead (npr and sportstalk helped me, just hearing people talk allowed me to not focus on my thoughts).

-Notice your sugar/caffeine intake. Limit this stuff after 5pm, it makes a difference

-Recognize that your sleep anxiety is 100% controlled by you. I used to get so angry and frustrated about not being able to sleep I found myself in a perpetual cycle of anxiety and insomnia and I had to accept that I needed to change my behaviors and attitudes about sleep if I wanted to improve.

So here is what I did and I made a commitment to myself to try this for 30 days (it took less than 2 weeks to work for me and has worked for 8 years now) in the summertime where I did not have class or have to work early the next day.

1) Follow the guidelines above
2) I laid down every night before midnight with the mantra that "this is my time for rest, even if I do not sleep this is my time to rest". I would lay down with the mindset that I was resting not sleeping.
3) I set an alarm and woke up to it everyday
4) I made sure to get some exercise everyday (even if it was just 10 pushups and some situps in my room)
5) On nights where I absolutely couldn't sleep and got restless I didn't panic. I used that time to do something productive, either read a non-fiction book or wrote but no matter how little sleep I got or if I didn't sleep at all I still got up for my alarm (which is when I then exercised).

NO NAPS! This throws off your sleep schedule, do what you need to do to get to your normal bedtime but remember to watch the caffeine.

The person who told me to do this said "your issue isn't with sleep, its with the frustration and anxiety of the issues in your life, including not being able to sleep. Your body needs rest, if you follow this routine your body will sleep without your mind getting in the way."

And he was right. The first few days were miserable but my body started winning over my mind and I was able to conquer my insomnia without drugs.

It's not easy, it takes discipline and commitment but nothing worth doing ever is.

Good luck! I hope this can help someone the way it helped me.



Sep 24, 2015
Can't sleep I'm 14!!! NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi I'm 14 years old and still have a sleeping problem, I don't know what to do my mom understands how difficult it is for me to sleep but my dad does not. I want to sleep really bad by myself. My mom sits next to my bed on a chair and I feel comfortable until she leaves to go sleep in her bed. I have no idea what to do to stop this stupid thing. Can you please help me.

Thanks Sebastian

Sep 29, 2015
I have the same problem and I AM 12 NEW
by: Anonymous

I know what it's like because it happens to me and trust me we don't like not being able to sleep in our own rooms.. I wish SOOO much that I could in fact I'm having the problem right now but just by seeing that it happens to their people to makes me feel better because I know that I'm not crazy and think I'm the only person in the world.. But to the people who want to know a little tip on how to fall asleep read on.. Now these are the things that help me so Ya.. I usually start at 99 and count down while my eyes are closed I usually asleep by 50 or so.. Then you can take a melitonin or you can make sure the room is cool because then you can snuggle in your blankets comfortable and not be scared about being out of your blankets.. Also sleep with a companion like an animal or sibling if you have one I have a brother and sister but they moved out so I'm basically an only child, but ya I hope if someone try's these then they work and if they have other tips then to share them...!:)

Sep 30, 2015
THANKYOU ALL I'm 17 and still have this problem Fmli NEW
by: Anonymous

hi I am 16 soon to turn 17 and I still sleep with my parents.iits been this way my whole life and it's hard to understand why I do it myself. As a 17 year old it's embarrassing. MY 12 YEAR OLD SISTER SLEEPS ON HER OWN IN THE PITCH BLACK AND WONT LET ME SLEEP WITH HER. I'm a creative,lively outgoing person with mild depression and normal social anxiety for an anxiety teen. I feel I'm smart and popular with my right group of people. But I am dead afraid of everything. (Sorry for spelling errors. I suck at spelling and I'm typing on my phone) lately in the recent months my routine has evolved to my mother sleeping in my bed with me untill I fall asleep( I KNOW AT 16!?) or me staying up on my phone to keep me distracted untill they fall asleep then I sneak into yet room with all my blankets and sleep on their floor. Really the only one who has a problem with this is my dad (and myself deep inside but I am just stuck so what are you to do) he try's to force me to sleep by myself and usually it does the opposite effect of what he wants which is everyone to get a good nights sleep because I usually end up having a panic attack of sorts and he has to sit at my bed untill I fall asleep. Another thing that helps is just anyone bein awake and around the house wile I fall asleep. The problem with this is if I purposely put my self to sleep wile someone is working or being awake (usually sleeping on the couch with the tv on) I'm focused so much on falling asleep that I can't actually sleep. When I do sleep I sleep with the Galway light on my bathroom light and if it's really bad my closet light. All of the doors have to be open for easy exit. In the daytime I can sleep fine because people are awake and I feel safe. I guess for me it's a sense of feelin protected. Also I can't sleep if my phone isn't near me. It's been a good helper for when I do wake up with anxiety to keep me distracted from my own imagination. I guess my problem with being awake and alone is I create scenarios in my head and it goes in a cycle of your being stupid you're fine to what if I'm not this time to your stupid you're fine. The base of this problem could be that my parents tracked a lot when I was younger. That plus my depression and anxiety. Really I'm a normal functioning happy teenager who I battling depression but I'm not sad. If that makes sense do I like myself ehhhh. Do I like my life sure. Now my dad travels often. The good part is my mom will let me sleep with her and there are 0 problems the bad part is my dads out of town. These scenarios I create in my head I guess you could say are attributed to random sound around the house, me making up sound and shadows and stuff. My dad just doesn't understand that by forcing me to be by myself doesn't help the situation worse. He just did that and I immediately had a panic attack. That makes me sound like a spoiled brat but a panic attack is different from a tantrum. Panic attacks suck. You can't breathe and it's feels like you're going to die. Panic attack if all of the worst case scenarios happening at once. It comes in waves mostly sometimes I'm more able to be more independent and others I can't even be alone ones the lights come off. Anther thing I've started to do is on my dads travel days, wait on my phone untill my dad wakes up then crawl in bed with my mom. If my dad just let me sleep on the floor I wouldn't be waking anyone up and is better for me than a panic attack and he doesn't understand. I've tried explaining but I just can't get it through to him. He always tells me you just have to decide to change and start thinking differently. People need to start treating mental illnesses like physical ones. You can't just decide it's time for your broken leg to heal and it's magically done! First you need to diagnose( find the base) find how to fix it. And just give support and time .(like a cast) sadly adults just don't understand because they tested mental illness differently. I will tell you on everything besides this I am a very very independent teen. I do online school and do it successfully I do theatre and have a job and friends I juggle my own schedual. My depression caused me to get really bad grades last year (sophomore) and I couldn't get my drivers license but I am working hard to bring up my gpa so I can get one. I still can't stay home alone (uber embarrassing because of think I'm almost 17 and I have a nanny for me and my sister) (also my sister can stay home alone she's 12) besides that I'm all set. Honestly I thought I was the only person in the world who did this and reading everyone's experiences really made me feel like less of a failure and burden so I hope my story helps. If it gets better I'll update! Stay strong to all the kids on here looking for help to fix their "problem" you are more than this.

Oct 03, 2015
HELP ME!!!!! NEW
by: Anonymous

I am a 11 year old. I cannot sleep alone! My mum sleeps with me. And then leaves I feel like a big baby! Please help me!

Oct 06, 2015
plz help NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi i am 14 years old and i have this to at night i cant fall asleep my nom says good night to me and when she goes to her room i jump out of my bed and run to her room and i stay in her room my dad is at work and my mom gets up at 3:00 in the morning so i feel really bad for my mom so plz help me stop this i dont like it at all

Oct 10, 2015
my son and i have difficulty in sleeping NEW
by: Anonymous

This started to happen when i woke up another morning,when i open my bedroom door i saw a thief passing by my room running. It was about 4am, ever since then i can't go to the bathroom or kitchen if i might need something in the middle of the night. I even lock our bed room doors. My son will tell that something comes in his mind when ever he wants to sleep,he wont even sleep on a matress he is so afraid. I dont know do we need a proffesional help or it will pass?it has now been full 2 years this thing happen but it gets worse lately. We feel safe when my husband is around us. My sob is 8 years. PLEASE HELP😔

Oct 11, 2015
Parents need to try harder NEW
by: Anonymous

To all the kids, this is not your fault. Your parents need to help you through this. You're not weird and you've done nothing wrong but you need to ask your parents to help you.

To all the parents that think they can lazily wait for their kids to "grow out of it" - you're wrong. Child rearing is hard work and it's not that you're a failure but this is a real problem that needs fixing. For your sanity, for your marriage or partnership, for potential future partnerships and most of all, for your child!

You need to push your children/teen to sleep on their own. Deal with some crying, sleepless nights and help them get through this hurdle. Stop making excuses. Your need to get a good night sleep for a few days work is not as important as helping your child through this.

Sure, you could wait and cross your fingers that they will grow out of it, all the while, your children are missing out on sleepovers and camp with friends and suffering the anxiety of knowing they are missing out on these things. Do you really think your child is "perfectly happy otherwise" when their friends are sharing stories at school about their fun sleepover or summer camp and your child is left out because they weren't able to go a night without sleeping next to you? Stop pretending this doesn't affect their lives outside of your home.

You encourage the behaviour every time you let them in your room. Now, go make a plan for them and help them gain the confidence you know they need in this world.

Oct 11, 2015
Parents need to try harder NEW
by: Anonymous

To all the kids, this is not your fault. Your parents need to help you through this. You're not weird and you've done nothing wrong but you need to ask your parents to help you.

To all the parents that think they can lazily wait for their kids to "grow out of it" - you're wrong. Child rearing is hard work and it's not that you're a failure but this is a real problem that needs fixing. For your sanity, for your marriage or partnership, for potential future partnerships and most of all, for your child!

You need to push your children/teen to sleep on their own. Deal with some crying, sleepless nights and help them get through this hurdle. Stop making excuses. Your need to get a good night sleep for a few days work is not as important as helping your child through this.

Sure, you could wait and cross your fingers that they will grow out of it, all the while, your children are missing out on sleepovers and camp with friends and suffering the anxiety of knowing they are missing out on these things. Do you really think your child is "perfectly happy otherwise" when their friends are sharing stories at school about their fun sleepover or summer camp and your child is left out because they weren't able to go a night without sleeping next to you? Stop pretending this doesn't affect their lives outside of your home.

You encourage the behaviour every time you let them in your room. Now, go make a plan for them and help them gain the confidence you know they need in this world.

Oct 13, 2015
Can't sleep NEW
by:

Hi I have the same problem I can't sleep alone I don't know why I always say u had a bad dream or I miss you and I don't know why

Oct 20, 2015
Am 13 and can not sleep alone NEW
by: Anonymous

Hello I'm 13. and I am also too scared to sleep alone for the last three years I have been sleeping with my mother because I am physically too scared to sleep alone . I normally go to sleep at about 9:30 PM with my mother and I tend to wake up between 1 AM and 3 AM and I can physically not go back to sleep when I wake up because I feel scared and anxious I feel like someone will come into to my house at night and kill me or someone will kidnap me or someone will rob my house my mum thinks it is my phone because I tend to play on my phone before going sleep . But I don't think it is if I have asked friends staying over I can sleep am I am doing with my friends but if no friends are staying I have to sleep with my mum. And if I sleep in my sisters house I will not stay in the spare room I will get into bed with my sister and her boyfriend so I think I need help! Thank you for reading my message💛

Oct 25, 2015
Camp NEW
by: Anonymous

Get her to join Air Cadets. In the summer time there are camps that are really fun and get her to go there . If she has any troubles there are plenty of specialized caring staff top help her.

Oct 27, 2015
Thank you all for showing me I'm defidently not alone NEW
by: Anonymous

I am only 11 years old, and I am TERRIFIED at sleeping in my own bed without my mom. I have one really bad adaptation, though. I usually stay up till at least 1:00 AM, even on school nights watching stuff on my iPad. Plz help, I've been Doing this for at least a year, probably sleep deprived.

Nov 05, 2015
Same Problems :T NEW
by: Anonymoose

I'm 11, and I can't sleep alone. Whenever my parents force me to, I get panic attacks and I start crying like crazy. It really sucks.. D: I like to have my own privacy but when my parents tell me to, I can't control myself. When I sleep, I usually have the light on and music on (Tchaikovsky) Any help?



Nov 08, 2015
My 13 year old daughter and my 14 year old son both have this problem NEW
by: Anonymous

It started with my son anxiety to sleep then I think my daughter caught on to the fact that I would sit with my son until he went off to sleep. She's on the mattress on my bedroom floor after I told her she was no longer allowed to sleep in my bed. She will stay awake until my son is asleep unless I let her have the bedroom light on, then she might fall asleep while I'm in the next room helping my son to drift off. I can cope with this as I have done for a long time now. The thing imworried about is when they go to their dads they want to sleep in his bed. I don't think a 13 year old young girl should be sleeping in her dads bed. But when I say this to her she see no wrong in it. She is still very immature for her age and has not yet started puberty, I think this is why she can't see anything wrong with it. Her dad still sees her as his little girl. But she not or won't be much longer. I don't want to stop her from staying at her dads house as he lives 250 miles away so it's not like he can come see her then drop her home after a few hours. I need help to make her and him see sence.

Nov 14, 2015
Same problem as your daughter NEW
by: Anonymous

Im 11 and still sleep with my pearents. I really don't want to but I have huge anxietys it's awfull. I went to camp with school and didn't sleep that well. Dose someone know where I could get help?

Nov 15, 2015
I am also 12, and have the same problem. NEW
by: The sleepless 12 year old

I have trouble sleeping alone at night, i always fall asleep sometime, but i takes awhile, and in that while, it is VERY stressful. My friend who I trust completely, has apparently had "paranormal encounters," and texted me while they were going on, like doors slamming shut, trapping her in a room, or scratches randomly showing up on her from nothing. I once spent the night at her house, and it was very creepy. The next day at her house, i felt like i was being watched the whole time, then i got a scratch on my arm. I believed her after that night at her house. When i go down into my grandmothers basement, she has creepy looking clowns going down the steps that she claims are "cute." If someone could help, it would be greatly appreciated.

Nov 15, 2015
I have had the same issue forever NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi, this is embarrassing to say but I also have this problem. I am 19 and will be 20 in three months. I live close to my university so I decided to stay home and save some money. My bedroom is on a floor from all others in the house but that is not the issue, but it does make it worse. I have always slept with someone, parents, siblings, ect.. But sometimes the fears would stop and I would sleep in my room alone with no problems for quite a while (a year or so). However, my anxiety continues to return. I have been fine for a few months but about two months ago I was afraid to go to sleep and made a pallet in my parents room next to their bed. I have been here for the past two months, sleeping on the floor in their room. They don't laugh, they are very understanding. But I feel so dumb and insecure about it but honestly, it's the best sleep I've had in months. I am a very outgoing, friendly, popular, girl but this fear is taking over my life. I cannot be the only one awake in the house, I cannot sleep if nobody else is home. I'm not sure what it is, but I lay down at night and the minute I close my eyes my mind starts turning. I begin to think about all of these terrible thought; ghosts, killers, kidnappers, just about anything bad that could happen while I'm asleep. I know I am safe, I know all of our doors are locked but still I lay with my eyes wide open for hours on end looking around the room with a flashlight. My sister is 17 and is pushing me to get help and I am finally at my breaking point.

Nov 20, 2015
I feel the same NEW
by: Dillon1303@aol.com

I am the same 12 almost 13 and cannot sleep alone or without parents, my father is abusive about it... all he cares about is sex in our family with my mom which is ok but he acts like I wasn't supposed to happen like I'm some freak... Seeking help from anyone right now it's 1 in the morning and I usually stay up till 5 when everyone gets up... PLEASE HELP... dillon1303@aol.com

Nov 23, 2015
I am going through the same thing! NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi, I 11+ years old, next year I'll be 12. Sometimes my mom plays the fool with me in the night and I couldn't sleep without my parents. I sleep on my mother's arms and when she gets up I start to cry. But in the morning I get up all alone to school. I mean parents are near me but I couldn't sleep without my mother's arms. And I tried to sleep last night but I couldn't. Please help me! Some day I also have to sleep alone for school camps and all. So please give any advice.

Nov 23, 2015
Scared of sleeping alone NEW
by: Anonymous

I am now eleven and cannot sleep alone.I think that some ghosts or something paranormal is going to happen to me or hurt me.But I know ghosts aren't real right?I just get so scared that I stared shaking and scary thoughts run through my head.I have to sleep with my sister because I'm so scared to sleep alone.This fear is so strong that I worry I will never overcome it.I slept in my room for a couple of weeks but after that I was scared again I was really scared.I need help does anyone have any advice?😪😰

Nov 27, 2015
.. NEW
by: Victoria

Hi I'm a 13 year old girl and I have anxiety about sleeping alone too. I'm scared that I might die in my sleep and that someone is standing next to me when I'm in bed I fill like I get watch while I'm trying to sleep and I don't know how to face my fear.

Nov 28, 2015
Same... NEW
by: Anonymous 12 yr old

My parents are divorced and I still can't sleep at my mom's house... Its been a year. I can ok ok boy sleep at my Grandmas house, and my dads house. Nobody else's. Help... I've been prescribed with anxiety resistant meds and clonidine. Then they removed that... We tried melatonin or advil PM or ZQuil. Nope non if them work? Any help?

Nov 30, 2015
11 year old daughter won't sleep alone NEW
by: Mommee of four

We've had this problem for about five years. I noticed it got worse after a divorce we went through. My daughter sleeps In her 3 & 8 year old brothers room on the 3 year old bed every night. Which kicks him into our room and makes our 14 year old sleep on the couch because he doesn't want to be in the basement by himself (not all the time) the two have their own rooms in the basement. We've tried everything even took her to a psychologist, melatonin...nothing worked. I finally gave in and just let her sleep in her brothers room/bed. It effects everyone in our family. I don't know what else to do.
By the way I'm NEVER watching Paranormal Activity lol sounds like it was pretty traumatizing for quite a few people on this blog lol!

Nov 30, 2015
I am 13 almost 14 NEW
by: Anonymous

I can't sleep alone and my parents won't let me sleep in there room I am also scared of something but I don't know what it is horrible what do I do.

Dec 13, 2015
I am the same NEW
by: Anonymous

I have been looking online as well to find help I cannot sleep in my room alone I must be with someone other wise I have bad dreams about being kidnapped and things like that I suffer with extreme anxiety. Anyone know what this is

Dec 18, 2015
I'm 16 and can't sleep alone NEW
by: Anonymous

I am currently 16 years old and I am truly terified of sleeping on my own it has been really tough to constantly lye to my friends that I sleep alone. I Really need help to sort this out I don't know where to go to get help

Jan 01, 2016
17 years old NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi I'm 17 and have had this problem since I could remember. I used to try sleeping with my sister or just someone else but I can only fall asleep easily with my mom. I don't really feel fearful about sleeping alone but when I do try or have to sleep alone I get frustrated and upset. No matter how tired I am my brain just won't wind down and let me sleep. It's like as soon as my head hits the pillow and I'm alone I'm wide awake. Granted I haven't forced myself to try and sleep on my own for consecutive nights. I need to find something that works for me soon because I don't want this problem following me through college.
With that all said, I don't think I can say anything that's all that helpful but I'm grateful to have found that sooo many others have gone through and are going through what I am. I feel so bad about myself thinking that my friends don't have to deal with this but now I see this is more common than I thought.
For some of us this might be our biggest problem in life. It could have be worse. Stay strong guys.

Jan 03, 2016
My sleep problem NEW
by:

I just turned 11 and I have this problem. My mom doesn't get eny good night's and nether do I I havw a tv in my room I have a door in my wall that leads to her room it is always left open when i atemp to sleep in my room and i have a dog that always sleeps with me i even leav the light on and non of it works

Jan 03, 2016
My sleep problem NEW
by:

I just turned 11 and I have this problem. My mom doesn't get eny good night's and nether do I I havw a tv in my room I have a door in my wall that leads to her room it is always left open when i atemp to sleep in my room and i have a dog that always sleeps with me i even leav the light on and non of it works

Jan 03, 2016
im 13 and afraid of sleeping alone NEW
by: Anonymous

hi im13 ,i have a fear of sleeping alone .I've started this fear of sleeping alone since i was a kid...im still sleeping with my parents room and im ashamed of myself because all of my other friends sleep alone.I am glad that im not the only one who feels this type of fear.I honestly dont know what is wrong with me...give me tips on how to sleep alone pls i cannot live like this annymore...

Jan 04, 2016
I'm the same but I worry NEW
by: Franny

I'm 10 and I still sleep with my mummy when she's not there I worry because people in my family are getting very ill my Aunty got cancer and since people in my family started getting ill I wanted to stay with my mummy because I got worried that she would get sick and I would have to stay with someone else but that's not it eather I would go on a sleep over at one of my friends house and I can't sleep it happens Every where to a sleep over to my fails house but it happens with my dads house too I would not sleep at all and It would be morning and I was soooo tired but I still didn't sleep I don't know what's wrong with me but I need to have my mummy there then I can't sleep

Jan 04, 2016
Same NEW
by: Anonymous

I'm 12 and going through what your daughter is. But with me im scared someone going to come upstairs and rob/ murder me. All this is because of a murder documentery on t.v.

If I hear a sound I'm look around the room scared. I can sleep alone only if someone is downstairs. My mum doesn't do what all your you do she doesn't seem to care or understand.

Right now it's 1:27am and I'm awake, scared but my mum told me to get downstairs. So that's a lot of sleep missed.


It would make your daughter feel better if you asked her why she's upset, from experience I'm still waiting for that question
:-(

Jan 05, 2016
My 11 year son wont sleep in his room NEW
by: Anonymous

Its been very interesting reading all these post as I wondered whether I should show more concern about the fact that my son would rather sleep on the floor in our room on a mattress than his own bed. This started about a year ago but before that we had to do the lay on the bed until he was asleep and also tried the tv and radio route. At first I was worried about him as he does have some irrational fears, ie, end of the world and when that might happen, but he is doing well at school, and he will go and stay at friends houses and seems to sleep ok there but I do think that is due to tiredness because they stay up late, as kids do so I let him do what he feels works for him. I wont force him to sleep in his room if he is not happy about it as I have done the listening to the crying for hours and that is heartbreaking and horrible. I dont think there is anything wrong with him and I hope he will grow out of this in his own time but until then, he will be in our room getting a good nights sleep. Be patient as it must be horrible for the kids to be that scared or nervous and not be able to sleep..goodluck to you all.

Jan 05, 2016
My 11 year son wont sleep in his room NEW
by: Anonymous

Its been very interesting reading all these post as I wondered whether I should show more concern about the fact that my son would rather sleep on the floor in our room on a mattress than his own bed. This started about a year ago but before that we had to do the lay on the bed until he was asleep and also tried the tv and radio route. At first I was worried about him as he does have some irrational fears, ie, end of the world and when that might happen, but he is doing well at school, and he will go and stay at friends houses and seems to sleep ok there but I do think that is due to tiredness because they stay up late, as kids do so I let him do what he feels works for him. I wont force him to sleep in his room if he is not happy about it as I have done the listening to the crying for hours and that is heartbreaking and horrible. I dont think there is anything wrong with him and I hope he will grow out of this in his own time but until then, he will be in our room getting a good nights sleep. Be patient as it must be horrible for the kids to be that scared or nervous and not be able to sleep..goodluck to you all.

Jan 05, 2016
My 11 year son wont sleep in his room NEW
by: Anonymous

Its been very interesting reading all these post as I wondered whether I should show more concern about the fact that my son would rather sleep on the floor in our room on a mattress than his own bed. This started about a year ago but before that we had to do the lay on the bed until he was asleep and also tried the tv and radio route. At first I was worried about him as he does have some irrational fears, ie, end of the world and when that might happen, but he is doing well at school, and he will go and stay at friends houses and seems to sleep ok there but I do think that is due to tiredness because they stay up late, as kids do so I let him do what he feels works for him. I wont force him to sleep in his room if he is not happy about it as I have done the listening to the crying for hours and that is heartbreaking and horrible. I dont think there is anything wrong with him and I hope he will grow out of this in his own time but until then, he will be in our room getting a good nights sleep. Be patient as it must be horrible for the kids to be that scared or nervous and not be able to sleep..goodluck to you all.

Jan 05, 2016
My 11 year son wont sleep in his room NEW
by: Anonymous

Its been very interesting reading all these post as I wondered whether I should show more concern about the fact that my son would rather sleep on the floor in our room on a mattress than his own bed. This started about a year ago but before that we had to do the lay on the bed until he was asleep and also tried the tv and radio route. At first I was worried about him as he does have some irrational fears, ie, end of the world and when that might happen, but he is doing well at school, and he will go and stay at friends houses and seems to sleep ok there but I do think that is due to tiredness because they stay up late, as kids do so I let him do what he feels works for him. I wont force him to sleep in his room if he is not happy about it as I have done the listening to the crying for hours and that is heartbreaking and horrible. I dont think there is anything wrong with him and I hope he will grow out of this in his own time but until then, he will be in our room getting a good nights sleep. Be patient as it must be horrible for the kids to be that scared or nervous and not be able to sleep..goodluck to you all.

Jan 05, 2016
My 11 year son wont sleep in his room NEW
by: Anonymous

Its been very interesting reading all these post as I wondered whether I should show more concern about the fact that my son would rather sleep on the floor in our room on a mattress than his own bed. This started about a year ago but before that we had to do the lay on the bed until he was asleep and also tried the tv and radio route. At first I was worried about him as he does have some irrational fears, ie, end of the world and when that might happen, but he is doing well at school, and he will go and stay at friends houses and seems to sleep ok there but I do think that is due to tiredness because they stay up late, as kids do so I let him do what he feels works for him. I wont force him to sleep in his room if he is not happy about it as I have done the listening to the crying for hours and that is heartbreaking and horrible. I dont think there is anything wrong with him and I hope he will grow out of this in his own time but until then, he will be in our room getting a good nights sleep. Be patient as it must be horrible for the kids to be that scared or nervous and not be able to sleep..goodluck to you all.

Jan 05, 2016
My 11 year son wont sleep in his room NEW
by: Anonymous

Its been very interesting reading all these post as I wondered whether I should show more concern about the fact that my son would rather sleep on the floor in our room on a mattress than his own bed. This started about a year ago but before that we had to do the lay on the bed until he was asleep and also tried the tv and radio route. At first I was worried about him as he does have some irrational fears, ie, end of the world and when that might happen, but he is doing well at school, and he will go and stay at friends houses and seems to sleep ok there but I do think that is due to tiredness because they stay up late, as kids do so I let him do what he feels works for him. I wont force him to sleep in his room if he is not happy about it as I have done the listening to the crying for hours and that is heartbreaking and horrible. I dont think there is anything wrong with him and I hope he will grow out of this in his own time but until then, he will be in our room getting a good nights sleep. Be patient as it must be horrible for the kids to be that scared or nervous and not be able to sleep..goodluck to you all.

Jan 05, 2016
My 11 year son wont sleep in his room NEW
by: Anonymous

Its been very interesting reading all these post as I wondered whether I should show more concern about the fact that my son would rather sleep on the floor in our room on a mattress than his own bed. This started about a year ago but before that we had to do the lay on the bed until he was asleep and also tried the tv and radio route. At first I was worried about him as he does have some irrational fears, ie, end of the world and when that might happen, but he is doing well at school, and he will go and stay at friends houses and seems to sleep ok there but I do think that is due to tiredness because they stay up late, as kids do so I let him do what he feels works for him. I wont force him to sleep in his room if he is not happy about it as I have done the listening to the crying for hours and that is heartbreaking and horrible. I dont think there is anything wrong with him and I hope he will grow out of this in his own time but until then, he will be in our room getting a good nights sleep. Be patient as it must be horrible for the kids to be that scared or nervous and not be able to sleep..goodluck to you all.

Jan 05, 2016
11 year old son sleeps in our room NEW
by: Anonymous

My 11 year old slreps on yhe floor on a mattress in our room as he does not like to ba alone at night. He is fine with sleep overs and camping with friends but ar home he is not happy in his own space at night. I have done the tv and radio route and the laying with him until he is asleep and also I tried to be forceful with him and made him stay in his room but that was horrible as he was so upset and it did not work for either him or me. So if he needs to sleep in our room so he gets a good night sleep then so be it, he is doing really well at school but does have a few issues, like stressing about the end of the world but otherwise he is fine. I do not feel that I need to get strong as I dont think this is a battle that requires an attack plan. He has an issue and has found a solution that works for him and us at the moment. To the parents - be patient and to the kids - I feel for you as it must be horrible to be that scared or nervous about something. Goodluck to you all.

Jan 05, 2016
11 year old son sleeps in our room NEW
by: Anonymous

My 11 year old slreps on yhe floor on a mattress in our room as he does not like to ba alone at night. He is fine with sleep overs and camping with friends but ar home he is not happy in his own space at night. I have done the tv and radio route and the laying with him until he is asleep and also I tried to be forceful with him and made him stay in his room but that was horrible as he was so upset and it did not work for either him or me. So if he needs to sleep in our room so he gets a good night sleep then so be it, he is doing really well at school but does have a few issues, like stressing about the end of the world but otherwise he is fine. I do not feel that I need to get strong as I dont think this is a battle that requires an attack plan. He has an issue and has found a solution that works for him and us at the moment. To the parents - be patient and to the kids - I feel for you as it must be horrible to be that scared or nervous about something. Goodluck to you all.

Jan 05, 2016
I have the same problem NEW
by: Anonymous

I am 13 and a half, and for the past four nights I've been having anxiety about sleeping alone. During the day I'm totally fine but when it gets around the time my parents lay down I start to get horrible anxiety, I don't know why. I was nauseated for three nights, and then it went away, but then I started getting anxiety about sleeping alone. I don't want to tell my parents because I know that they might not believe me. I also don't want to invade their bed. I try to sleep with my siblings, but it's not the same. My anxiety only goes away when I'm with my parents.

Jan 07, 2016
Small Problem please halp NEW
by: Anonymous

Okay,I am 11yo to be 12 in a month and ever since I was 7 or 6 I would go sleep in my parents room in the middle of the night at this point they don't like me in there. Some nights I CAN sleep alone but others i just go sleep with them...Random Fact: On school nights I can sleep in my room all by myself currently it is winter break and I have slept with them for a little over half of the break tonight I plan to sleep alone.I don't like sleeping with them I feel too old but their bed is much warmer.Some nights i get scared like every scary thing i know of just blast at me. PLEASE HELP i want to be like a regular tween!

Jan 07, 2016
HALP ME NEW
by: Anonymous

okay,I am 11yo to be 12 in a month and sometimes i sleep with my parents. But,some nights i sleep alone then other nights all the scary things i know just blast at me! It helps that their bed is warmer and comfier. On school nights i can sleep alone but it is winter break and i've slept with them about a little over half the break(3 weeks). I don't like sleeping with them it is embarrassing but i can't help it sometimes. PLEASE HELP it's bad how do I stop getting scared. I sleep with the tv on and also i don't freak out if i can't sleep with them I do fine in sleepovers and if it matters I have straight A's in school. But do HALP

Jan 07, 2016
To all the strugglers NEW
by: Anonymous

I remember as a hold having this issue as its really desstresting, I advise soft lamps, sleep mists on the pillows and the TV should be on, and if worst comes to worst maybe they should try sleep medication to have restful sleep from 8-9 hours, and then they will realise it's not too hard to sleep and gradually come off the pills, sometimes it's better due to maturity

Jan 08, 2016
I have the same problem NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi I am 12 am can't sleep by myself.My mom and dad don't sleep in the same room or bed due to my dads problem with his back. When I was a baby I cryed and my mom put me in her bed.I have sleep there my whole life and have troble sleeping plz give me advice on how to go to sleep by myself thanx:)

Jan 10, 2016
I'm 13 and it can be hard to sleep alone NEW
by: Anonymous

I'm turning 13 this month and I'm currently afraid of sleeping alone. Due to certain circumstances I'm no longer sleeping with my older sibling and at bedtime (which is usually at around 12am-1am on a weekend) I find myself getting scared and begin to even convince myself that there are ghosts and such in my house/room. It's not like I can choose to be afraid or not, though still people treat it like it is a choice or they won't believe that it's a real problem at all. I know I've been reading it'll go with time but I'm worried it won't. Please help, I'm not getting a good night's sleep and I'm worried that soon I'm going to be very sleep deprived. Thank you!

Jan 10, 2016
I'm that daughter NEW
by: Anonymous

Hey! I'm 13 now and I can't sleep without an adult next to me doesn't have to be my parents. I can't even sleep in another room without my parents.I tried to sleep on the upper floor of the house where my cousin lives, we stayed up all night then when I wanted to fall asleep I couldn't. So I got downstairs where my parents sleep and I slept with them. They think I'm crazy but I'm not I just can't sleep. Just trust me on this one your daughter isn't crazy so let's just pray this will go away.
Bye

Jan 11, 2016
Same Situation NEW
by: Anonymous

i always have that same anxiety when i tried to fall asleep on my own. I would start to panic when i was the last one awake!! When i sleep in my parents room it soothes me. i considered going on the ipad to help me sleep but it just keeps me up. Im thankful that im not the only one to have the same situation. Im 13 now and i thought i was the only girl who slept with her parents. i know i will get out of this "phase" but it stresses me out about how i will start thinking about sleeping in my own room. Any tips? Thanks!

Jan 23, 2016
my daughter NEW
by: Anonymous

my daughter is 15 and still can't sleep in her own room
she willingly sleep if someone else in the room
currently sleeping on a mattress in her sisters room
is very anxious about sleep all the time
its a nightmare
don't know how best to help her

Jan 23, 2016
same problem NEW
by: lilli

I'm 15 years old, I have this problem. I've had it for as long as I can remember. Even the though of not having my mom sleep near me can bring me to tears. It makes me feel abnormal compared to other kids. I suffer from really bad anxiety and depression, and I recently lost my father to a drug over dose. I wish I was able to sleep in my room at night without my mother being in the same room. I even share a room with my little sister and I still want my mom. I want to change, but I have no idea how. Should I talk to a councillor? Should I go back on anti-depression/anxiety medication? My mother wants to help but she doesn't know how. Someone please guide us in the right direction :( if anybody does want to get a hold of me to tell me how to help, my email is lillikinz13@gmail.com

Jan 25, 2016
My 19 yr old sometimes has very terrible anxiety attacks NEW
by: Anonymous

So I allow him to sleep in my bed when that happens. It isn't often and it just gives him a sense of comfort. It's something we are working on with his Dr. to get him beyond it. I don't make a big deal about it I allow him to be in a place he feels safe and loved.

Jan 28, 2016
My Daughter cannot sleep alone, she is now 13 NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi, ive searching for something for myself & in my middle 50's. I found this web site. I'm sad & embarrass to say. I am still petrified of sleeping alone. I was brought up in a household that was cruel. I have children who I ensured felt happy and secure. They are fine. My husband will be in hospital for two days and my anxiety levels are just through the roof!

Jan 30, 2016
Me NEW
by: Anonymous

I am 8 and cannot sleep without my mom right she is not here and I am crying my sister won't let me sleep with her.

Jan 31, 2016
My daughter will be 21 years but still can't sleep alone. NEW
by: Anonymous

My daughter's problem not sleeping alone is getting into me. Anyone can help!

Feb 08, 2016
13 PLEASE HELP NEW
by: Anonymous

Ok I'm 13 and my parents are divorced at my dads house I sleep like a rock with no lights on or anything. But at my moms I sleep on there floor. I know I bother her I feel horrible, I constantly hit the closet doors and they make a notice when they hit together waking her up. I have never been more embarrassed about anything in my whole life I will never grow out of this. I have gone to my dads house just to sleep so much that my mom thinks that I enjoy more at that house. I wish I was normal. My stepdad thinks I am the weirdest kid because of it! Here is a example we have a guest bedroom down in our basement when people spend the night my mom forgets and tells them they can sleep in my room. We were down in the basement putting together a head board when my mom said I don't want you to sleep down here. I said ok just don't make people sleep in my bed. Then my step dad said if you don't who will! I AM SO UPSET 😭

Feb 11, 2016
maybe this? i m sorry for your child. NEW
by: Anonymous

I never trusted my parents before high school, still don't. I was definitely creative as a child, my parents would leave me home alone, and i would be frozen until they got back. I would go upstairs to my room and curl in a ball under my blanket thinking that if i was still and didn't breathe very loudly they would think i had left with my parents, and forgot to make my bed. The worst part was i would hold my breath for as long as i could, and then i would gasp for air, whiand the noise would give me such anxiety i would be sobbing silently, and with the noise from that it would only get worse and worse. You see because even though i felt safe under my covers i also couldn't see what was happening outside so i would freak at any noise. I'm not quite sure who they were; the thing i was scared of. At one point it was an axe murderer, but i didn't know what an axe murderer was at the time that word just perfectly fit whatever they was. At night from when I was like two to 12 I couldn't fall asleep until like 1 or 2 in the morning. I would just stay frozen in bed. I had to have every part of my body under my bedcovers or i though it would would disappear or my toes would get cut of or something. I had to have every light on and i had to sleep with ever door on my floor and the door to the staircase closed to avoid anything coming upstairs. I also went through a period of time when i thought ghost were in my room and every time i went to bed the door had to be closed before the light turned off or because in my head ghosts could only hurt me in the dark. I had dreams about these ghosts planning to kill me. Every night after i turned of the light and closed the door i would sprint to my bed and jump into it so nothing could pull me under. I never slept with my parent because i never trusted them and we never understood each other. They had never been there for me and i always had to figure everything out on my own. Its been a few years. Thankfully or else i would probably be considered schizophrenic. It took me about a year to get over. You see i also couldn't go outside after 7 because i thought someone would kidnap me so i would walk my dog a little farther each night, i would walk a little slower to my bed, when i was lying frozen in bed i would list all the reasons the tricks in my mind were fake, sometimes i would peak my toes out from under the covers. I now have no fear, i am still a little scared of the dark, but only because my vision is impaired at night not for creepy reasons. I would ask your child if its a reason like this, and help them understand why what their seeing and thinking is fake. Also if thy need help get them help, this will show them you care no matter how hard they struggle, there is nothing wrong with your child if they need help, put their feelings before your need for a perfect family.

Feb 19, 2016
Sleeping paralyzed NEW
by: Anonymous

Some people even kids that are angels suffer from this sleeping disorder , I'm 49 years old 4 divorces and I realized I have been married because I don't wan to sleep alone, that's the reason I was getting married for one reason sleeping companions:( they never knew that's why the whole word marriage didn't work. Studying myself about how the problem I found this SLEEPING PARALYZED is the most horrible feeling at night time and when we have to go to bed. I got my last divorce a yea ago I'm sleeping by myself with lights on all over the place. I got into meditation programs and it helps but my next plan is to buy a dog for sleeping companion

Feb 24, 2016
You can say I grew out of it, but... NEW
by: 22 and still afraid

I never slept as a child at night. Ever. I remember being very wee and just lying awake at night being so incredibly paranoid. In kindergarten, my teacher would consistently ask my mother why I was not getting enough sleep because I would often sleep in the classroom. I remember (as a kindergartener) making so many deals with my mom about keeping lights on, keeping hall lights on, a fan, a radio (no TVs allowed in bedrooms). Eventually I began sleeping with her and my dad. Since then, I have NEVER slept alone, and if I did, it was due to pure exhaustion. I am 22 now, so of course, I have transitioned from sleeping with my parents, to friends at summer camps, to high school boyfriends at their houses, to roommates in college, and now to my fiancé. If I slept alone, in my own bed, it would be for about 3 hours after the sun had risen and until I needed to get up for work or school. I literally could not sleep unless the sun was up. I don't know why I am revisiting this issue again, as I always felt like I "got over it." I will say that no one has ever asked me why I need to sleep with someone, and I am not too sure (but have ideas), but I think if you asked your child, or tried to tell your parents why you just can't be alone at night, it might help sort out some issues.

Feb 24, 2016
You can say I grew out of it, but... NEW
by: 22 and still afraid

I never slept as a child at night. Ever. I remember being very wee and just lying awake at night being so incredibly paranoid. In kindergarten, my teacher would consistently ask my mother why I was not getting enough sleep because I would often sleep in the classroom. I remember (as a kindergartener) making so many deals with my mom about keeping lights on, keeping hall lights on, a fan, a radio (no TVs allowed in bedrooms). Eventually I began sleeping with her and my dad. Since then, I have NEVER slept alone, and if I did, it was due to pure exhaustion. I am 22 now, so of course, I have transitioned from sleeping with my parents, to friends at summer camps, to high school boyfriends at their houses, to roommates in college, and now to my fiancé. If I slept alone, in my own bed, it would be for about 3 hours after the sun had risen and until I needed to get up for work or school. I literally could not sleep unless the sun was up. I don't know why I am revisiting this issue again, as I always felt like I "got over it." I will say that no one has ever asked me why I need to sleep with someone, and I am not too sure (but have ideas), but I think if you asked your child, or tried to tell your parents why you just can't be alone at night, it might help sort out some issues.

Feb 25, 2016
I'm 14 NEW
by: Anonymous

I'm 14 and still sleep with my mom my dad usually sleeps on the couch my 16 year old brother use to sleep with us to but he stopped about 3 months ago I can't sleep in my own bed cause I'm scared I also am embarrassed because all of my friends sleep in there own beds ughhhh

Feb 26, 2016
I am 13 YO and have same problem NEW
by: Dashing Sameer

Iam 13 year old and Iam having this problem since last few month. I tried to sleep alone in my room and I can sleep alone at the day time but when the night falls Iam being afraid to sleep alone . I give myself courage to sleep alone in my room
but I am really very scared of breakage of sleep during nights and can't sleep alone :( please help me solve this problem !!!

Mar 01, 2016
My Daughter cannot sleep Alone,She is Now 13 NEW
by: Anonymous

I am 14 and I have the same problem and I hate it so much .. I beat myself up about it .. My mum and dad are divorced(They have been for 6 years now ) and I always blamed myself .. Because of advents that had happened before ...and ever since then I struggled to sleep by myself .. If I was in my room .. My heart would start racing out of my chest and I would hurt lay there with my eyes closed and I just won't go to sleep . I don't know if it's because I'm scared my mum is going to leave or its todo with my room however I don't get this when I'm at my dads .. I really hope I grow out of it .. But it's horrible .. But when I go into my mums room it's homely and I feel safe it weird but I wish that I could more independent in this but I can't and I don't know what to do about it ?

Mar 10, 2016
Sadly we are alike NEW
by: Anonymous

My sister is 7 and sleeps in my parent's room. She takes the bed so my dad sleeps somewhere else. I used to, and now I just do it when I am anxious for a performance. Tomorrow, in fact, I have to perform at the state Capital! Very worried. I feel I will have night terrors, although I never have had one in my life. Nor nightmares. And when I remember my dreams they are normally with the grace of God and his angels, probs because I read my bible before I sleep for comfort.

I am also afraid of fires...lol. But at least we are not alone. I also have insomnia from time to time.

Mar 12, 2016
16 year old NEW
by: Anonymous

I'm a 16 year old girl and it's really terrifying to sleep alone at night. The problem with me is that, I cannot sleep anywhere other than with my mom or sister. If I do so, my mind is so very active that it makes me fear about the next day's schedule that gets spoiled due to such sleeplesssness. I cannot share this with my parents cuz they would feel bad too but I'm helpless. I hope this problem doesn't persist when I reach college.

Mar 15, 2016
Me too NEW
by: Anonymous

I'm 11 and I can't sleep at my friends house or sleep by myself I take melatonin but that doesn't help. I have become so bad that my parents put a bed outside my room and my mom sleeps there for me. I hate doing that! I don't tell my friends bc I am afraid they will think I'm weird. I always call my mom at my friends and make her pick me up. And at my house I make her sleep with me. What do I do?

Mar 15, 2016
Frustrating Frenzie NEW
by: Anonymous

I am 12 and I can sleep in my own room only if someone is with me by my side. I can sleep in any bed but someone has to be with me. I am a athlete and do very good in school. I am normal in the day but by night I can't sleep and my family really doesn't mind all that much but it can be annoying for me. Please give some advice if you have some!

Mar 19, 2016
Same NEW
by: Michaella

I fell like i was the only one that cant sleep in her own bed but, no. Im 12 yrs old. Im scaerd of ghosts and i have nightmares:'-(



Mar 19, 2016
Same. I'm 11 NEW
by: 11Year old!

Hi. I'm 11 and at this very moment it's 3:20 am I can't sleep. I'm on a mattress in my perents room.It started in December 2015 and every Saturday night I have to sleep In my own room. I fall asleep easily but when I wake up in the Night I can't fall asleep. Pls help

Mar 23, 2016
Same problem I'm 11 NEW
by: Anonymous

I'm 11 yo and I can't sleep by myself OR at my friends. My mom gets mad at me bc I always make her sleep upstairs on a golf out couch in the media room. She wants to sleep downstairs with my dad but I make her come up. I feel bad. And when I go to my friends house they watch movies and eat popcorn and I always look sad or frightened around bed so they are always wondering, "is she scared?" And I always call my mom to get me. Advise?

Mar 28, 2016
Im 15 and can't sleep by myself NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi, I'm 15 and still sleep with my mom, I can't sleep alone. I am so scared of the dark and scared of sleeping alone and what will happen to me if I do. I get horrible anxiety just thinking about having to sleep alone, I am fine during the day but if someone forces me to sleep alone I will cry and beg to sleep with someone else, I will not be able to get to sleep if I sleep alone, one night I had to sleep alone and cried all night in my bedroom no joke. I don't want to have to always sleep with someone, but I seriously cannot sleep alone, I wish i could, but I get so scared to the point of I would rather die then go to sleep alone. I dread going to sleep at night, because it makes me extremely nervous. Also it doesn't help that I often have horrific nightmares often, and always I remember them and they haunt me. I am a phenomenal student, I make outstanding grades, I have tons of friends, I play sports, I have a normal family life, but yet I still can't sleep alone, and probably never will I guess. Pray for me please I need help.

Mar 31, 2016
nearly 12, and i still can not sleep Alone! NEW
by: the girl who cannot sleep ...

hallo! i am almost 12 years old and i just can't go to sleep without being comforted by my mum. i of course do eventually fall asleep but it is still difficult (i know!).

i just moved out of my old room at my dads, that i used to share with my sister, and i moved into my own new room. i still can't fall asleep in it. i also get very scared of certain movies. i still haven't overcome some of them in years!

None of you are alone! :-)

Mar 31, 2016
Scared and Angry NEW
by: Anonymous

I have had this since I was born. My mum has told me that even in the hospital when the nurses would take me from the crib at the side of her bed I would start bawling. they couldn't put me together with all the other babies because otherwise I would just wake them all up. So I would stay next to my mother. Then during my kindergarten years and earlier I would fall asleep with my mum next to me and then just wake up again and fall asleep on the couch with my dad watching midnight soccer. This resulted in me having a passion in soccer however it also greatly affects my levels of confidence. I am an outgoing, happy person who loves to hang out with her friends and go new places and try new things during the day. But at night, if my mum isn't on her futon (Japanese mattress) I end up falling asleep with anxiety, fear, sick stomachs and most likely waking up 3-4-5 times a night. Most times I either do all-nighters or am desperate to stay up long enough to feel safe. I am paranoid about things being moved in my room. Hate having lights off and always have at least one on. At school, after an all-nighter, I fell asleep in almost every class and I got told off or joked at by the teachers at least 3 times. I didn't tell mum or dad. The teachers don't understand either and a councillor would just give me options I have already looked up or heard from others. I have a vivid imagination and certain images will stay in my mind for months on end. I went to a sleepover and one of my girl friends invited me, it was a guy in my classes birthday (and the girls were of course in a different room) but the morning after they were watching INSIDIOUS and I had made this guy promise me that he would tell me when to look away. Of course in the most horrible part where it shows what the thing is he thinks it is funny to not tell me to look away. I have been haunted by that scene since. Paranoia and fear has engulfed me in a tight grip and I am constantly scared. I wish i could fall asleep with ease and I wish I could stop depriving my single mum of sleep, keeping her up and everything else. I get lectured and yelled at because of it... I know it's my fault... I just don't know how to fix it.

I want to be that confident girl I know is inside me, but I can't find her when I can't fall asleep...

Mar 31, 2016
No one understands NEW
by: Anonymous

I am 12 years old and I still am scared to sleep alone.I was fine until I watched paranormal activity and then I just couldnt.My mom and dad are split up and my mom is okay with me being scared but my dad is not.I have had to go home from sleepovers and it is just really embarrassing.None of my family/friends get it.I feel better reading these other comments though.

Apr 01, 2016
18 years old and I still have that problem! NEW
by: Anonymous

I can't stand it! I'm so sick of sleeping with my mom. I'm going to be in college next fall 2 hours away, but I can't even sleep by myself! My mom has always said "oh you'll eventually grow out of it" but I doubt it! I mean I go through stages where I do sleep by myself, but for the most part I sleep with my mom. It's not that weird, because it's in a king size bed and all. But I just can't sleep by myself. I tried having a dog sleep with me, but it doesn't help... I'm just very scared of things like ghosts and demons! I have very bad anxiety and I'm supposed to take medication, but as I already struggle with my weight (I'm 187 at 5 foot) I do not take the medicine as it generally causes weight gain. I need help! But I don't know how or where to get it from

Apr 04, 2016
i was that way when i was young and my daughter also NEW
by: Anonymous

I was that way because I had a older brother sneaking in my bedroom at night trying to omelets me when I would awake and yell for my mom He would hurry out so he wouldn't get caught. And He told me If I told my mom he would hit me. My daughter is twenty eight now. But still afraid at night. She has separation angziety disorder. I know they do need to talk to someone they trust not to tell what they say

Apr 05, 2016
Please help me NEW
by: My name

Hi I am an 12 year old girl who unfortunately still sleeps in her own room 😒.I don't need my parents right next to me but I prefer them in the same room as me.I can go to a sleepover or an overnight trip without my parents but I can't go to sleep by myself.Please help me, it is terrible. Especially when your big brother makes fun of you for it😞

Apr 05, 2016
Please help me NEW
by: My name

Hi I am an 12 year old girl who unfortunately still sleeps in her own room 😒.I don't need my parents right next to me but need them in the same room as me.I can go to a sleepover or an overnight trip without my parents but I can't go to sleep by myself.Please help me, it is terrible. Especially when your big brother makes fun of you for it😞

Apr 10, 2016
I'm a 12 year old boy and I need help with sleeping. NEW
by:

I am terrified and sleeping alone, I just want some help. I'm 12 years old and can't sleep alone.

Apr 11, 2016
I am 22 now and had the same problem when I was younger NEW
by: Anonymous

All I can remember is that I was laying with my mom on the couch and she was flicking through the channels and chuckie came on she changed it but I insisted that I wanted to watch it, bad idea...it scared me so much because I had so many toys and dolls so I lol as an irrational little kid I thought my toys we're gonna come alive and kill me..I had vivid nightmares of the movie for years that I slept with my mom god rest her soul...I think it stopped at 11 for me Because I started to get a social life and wanted my privacy and also my parents had bought me a dog in which I slept with...As I am older I look back on how hard frustarting that must have been for my parents and their marriage my dad would sleep in a spare bedroom because I would literally cling to my mom as I slept...I just felt so comfortable and safe right next to my mom it was so calming...I couldnt stand that thought of sleeping alone when I was younger....and they did try then and again to but i either tried then got scared and ended up in their anyway...my mother definitely coddled me but I dont regret It at alls seeing as thoI miss her so much!!! Hopefully everyone who is struggling with this can eventually get some peace and courage to sleep alone!!!

Apr 11, 2016
I am 22 now and had the same problem when I was younger NEW
by: Anonymous

All I can remember is that I was laying with my mom on the couch and she was flicking through the channels and chuckie came on she changed it but I insisted that I wanted to watch it, bad idea...it scared me so much because I had so many toys and dolls so I lol as an irrational little kid I thought my toys we're gonna come alive and kill me..I had vivid nightmares of the movie for years that I slept with my mom god rest her soul...I think it stopped at 11 for me Because I started to get a social life and wanted my privacy and also my parents had bought me a dog in which I slept with...As I am older I look back on how hard frustarting that must have been for my parents and their marriage my dad would sleep in a spare bedroom because I would literally cling to my mom as I slept...I just felt so comfortable and safe right next to my mom it was so calming...I couldnt stand that thought of sleeping alone when I was younger....and they did try then and again to but i either tried then got scared and ended up in their anyway...my mother definitely coddled me but I dont regret It at alls seeing as thoI miss her so much!!! Hopefully everyone who is struggling with this can eventually get some peace and courage to sleep alone!!!

Apr 11, 2016
I am going through it myself NEW
by: Anonymous

I have gone through this for many many years, but I finally found something that works. I have a life sized stuff bear that I tuck in next to me and I get to sleep just fine with him.

Apr 17, 2016
Please Help!!! NEW
by: Hailey Forbes

I have this problem. I am turning 12 in 4 days and if my parents tell me to sleep alone, I have an anxiety attack and I freak out. I cannot sleep alone. It all started when one day when I was 8 years old or so, I was being dropped off at my friend's house. I have not seen my mother all day and she was dropping me off. I got there and started to have this weird thing where I couldn't breathe and I started crying and I almost fell over. Up until a couple months ago, I did not go to sleepovers. My parents get into fights over me becasue I cannot sleep without my mom. In fact, I think they are fighting right now over me. I just can't sleep alone without feeling like I'm gonna die. I have to have someone beside me. I really hope I grow out of it because it is tearing me and my family apart. Thank you 😃

Apr 24, 2016
Well I'm almost 15 NEW
by: Anonymous

I have had this issue ever since I was 5, when I had a vivid and horrifying nightmare that made me sleep in my parents room. I think I've slept alone for a week since then. Now that I've hit puberty and my hormones are going crazy, it's gotten worse and I can't sleep alone without lying next to someone :(. I feel like I'm not normal and that it's never gonna get better, but I hope someday it will. I want to be able to sleep alone at friends houses too, but I just can't.

May 03, 2016
help needed? NEW
by: Johanna

Dear fellow posters
I, 31 year old woman (currently living in the Netherlands)have been in this situation and outgrown it!I was just surprised to find this thread and the massive amount of responses! It always felt as a very personal matter and I didn’t expect to come across so many experiences..about me: I actually slept in my moms bedroom till 15 years of age. It was a very difficult thing for my parents and me, both, to deal with. It affected my development (process from girl to teenager to independent woman), created massive amounts of shame and was a huge burden to both, the relationship of my parents as the relationship of my parents to me. I appreciate the comments in this section that try to ease parental worry or your own worry(kid) and say it will pass.
However, I think there is a lot to be possible said that is important to consider. Also, even if it does not seem this way it IS actually possible to deal and find solutions. I really would like to support people here in this thread and share some advice first hand! About how to communicate with the child (or from child to parent) and how to intervene. And my experience of what can and did go wrong and why.. and what the mechanics are that keep this dreadful situation ongoing (wanting to sleep alone but being too scared).
Speaking about myself I am majoring in psychology and becoming a clinical psychologist atm. Personally, I view my life experience as more important, I know what happened and how it was like first hand, BUT, having a scientific background actually helped me to reflect on it on a deeper lever.
If you feel I might be of any help to you we could arrange a skype meeting and you could contact me by mailing to askafriendtoday@posteo.net (my coaching e-mail) You are free to try out a session of 45min and pay after a contribution to my efforts if you found it helpful (paypal\ideal). (I offer some low-priced, easy available (no waiting time) coaching (30$\25€) to life topics I experience as relevant and important. I have had a lot of challenging life experiences –no point for details here- and had good support when needed in my environment, so this is my way of giving back and making use of the experience I had –beyond the realm of a clinical setting.)
(I can also share my website for you to get an impression, however I am still setting it up -being busy with other local projects- so it would be more for you to get a small impression, see a picture of me..mail me for that if you want.)

May 03, 2016
help needed? NEW
by: Johanna

Dear fellow posters
I, 31 year old woman (currently living in the Netherlands) and I have been in this situation and outgrown it! I was just surprised to find this thread and the massive amount of responses! It always felt as a very personal matter and I didn’t expect to come across so many experiences..about me: I actually slept in my moms bedroom till 15 years of age. It was a very difficult thing for my parents and me, both, to deal with. It affected my development (process from girl to teenager to independent woman), created massive amounts of shame and was a huge burden to both, the relationship of my parents as the relationship of my parents to me. I appreciate the comments in this section that try to ease parental worry or your own worry(kid) and say it will pass.
However, I think there is a lot to be possible said that is important to consider. Also, even if it does not seem this way it IS actually possible to deal and find solutions. I really would like to support people here in this thread and share some advice first hand! About how to communicate with the child (or from child to parent) and how to intervene. And my experience of what can and did go wrong and why.. and what the mechanics are that keep this dreadful situation ongoing (wanting to sleep alone but being too scared).
Speaking about myself I am majoring in psychology and becoming a clinical psychologist atm. Personally, I view my life experience as more important, I know what happened and how it was like first hand, BUT, having a scientific background actually helped me to reflect on it on a deeper lever.
If you feel I might be of any help to you we could arrange a skype meeting and you could contact me by mailing to askafriendtoday@posteo.net (my coaching e-mail) You are free to try out a session of 45min and pay after a contribution to my efforts if you found it helpful (paypal\ideal). (I offer some low-priced, easy available (no waiting time) coaching (30$\25€) to life topics I experience as relevant and important. I have had a lot of challenging life experiences –no point for details here- and had good support when needed in my environment, so this is my way of giving back and making use of the experience I had –beyond the realm of a clinical setting.)
(I can also share my website for you to get an impression, however I am still setting it up -being busy with other local projects- so it would be more for you to get a small impression, see a picture of me..mail me for that if you want.)

May 03, 2016
help needed? NEW
by: Johanna

Dear fellow posters
I, 31 year old woman (currently living in the Netherlands) and I have been in this situation and outgrown it! I was just surprised to find this thread and the massive amount of responses! It always felt as a very personal matter and I didn’t expect to come across so many experiences..about me: I actually slept in my moms bedroom till 15 years of age. It was a very difficult thing for my parents and me, both, to deal with. It affected my development (process from girl to teenager to independent woman), created massive amounts of shame and was a huge burden to both, the relationship of my parents as the relationship of my parents to me. I appreciate the comments in this section that try to ease parental worry or your own worry(kid) and say it will pass.
However, I think there is a lot to be possible said that is important to consider. Also, even if it does not seem this way it IS actually possible to deal and find solutions. I really would like to support people here in this thread and share some advice first hand! About how to communicate with the child (or from child to parent) and how to intervene. And my experience of what can and did go wrong and why.. and what the mechanics are that keep this dreadful situation ongoing (wanting to sleep alone but being too scared).
Speaking about myself I am majoring in psychology and becoming a clinical psychologist atm. Personally, I view my life experience as more important, I know what happened and how it was like first hand, BUT, having a scientific background actually helped me to reflect on it on a deeper lever.
If you feel I might be of any help to you we could arrange a skype meeting and you could contact me by mailing to askafriendtoday@posteo.net (my coaching e-mail) You are free to try out a session of 45min and pay after a contribution to my efforts if you found it helpful (paypal\ideal). (I offer some low-priced, easy available (no waiting time) coaching (30$\25€) to life topics I experience as relevant and important. I have had a lot of challenging life experiences –no point for details here- and had good support when needed in my environment, so this is my way of giving back and making use of the experience I had –beyond the realm of a clinical setting.)

May 03, 2016
help needed? NEW
by: Johanna

Dear fellow posters
I, 31 year old woman (currently living in the Netherlands) and I have been in this situation and outgrown it! I was just surprised to find this thread and the massive amount of responses! It always felt as a very personal matter and I didn’t expect to come across so many experiences..about me: I actually slept in my moms bedroom till 15 years of age. It was a very difficult thing for my parents and me, both, to deal with. It affected my development (process from girl to teenager to independent woman), created massive amounts of shame and was a huge burden to both, the relationship of my parents as the relationship of my parents to me. I appreciate the comments in this section that try to ease parental worry or your own worry(kid) and say it will pass.
However, I think there is a lot to be possible said that is important to consider. Also, even if it does not seem this way it IS actually possible to deal and find solutions. I really would like to support people here in this thread and share some advice first hand! About how to communicate with the child (or from child to parent) and how to intervene. And my experience of what can and did go wrong and why.. and what the mechanics are that keep this dreadful situation ongoing (wanting to sleep alone but being too scared).
Speaking about myself I am majoring in psychology and becoming a clinical psychologist atm. Personally, I view my life experience as more important, I know what happened and how it was like first hand, BUT, having a scientific background actually helped me to reflect on it on a deeper lever.
If you feel I might be of any help to you we could arrange a skype meeting and you could contact me by mailing to askafriendtoday@posteo.net (my coaching e-mail) You are free to try out a session of 45min and pay after a contribution to my efforts if you found it helpful (paypal\ideal). (I offer some low-priced, easy available (no waiting time) coaching (30$\25€) to life topics I experience as relevant and important. I have had a lot of challenging life experiences –no point for details here- and had good support when needed in my environment, so this is my way of giving back and making use of the experience I had –beyond the realm of a clinical setting.)

May 03, 2016
Sorry! NEW
by: Johanna

There were trouble with uploading my comment..I got an error message..and now I posted 3 times without being able to remove it:\

May 04, 2016
Help NEW
by: Anonymous

I'm 12 and I'm going 13 this year and I have been sleeping in my mams room ever since I watched a scary movie called the grudge when I was 8 I don't know what to do like every time I go to a friends or relatives house I'm fine as long as my friend is in the same room but when I'm at home I never can I stayed up literally all night once because I couldn't get asleep I stayed up until 1pm the next day I always this that I'm gonna sleep in my own bed but as soon as I close my eyes I feel like someone is watching me or walking towards me I really don't know what to do help me

May 08, 2016
Me too NEW
by: Anonymous

I'm 15 now and when I was younger I was the exact same until I suddenly found comfort in having my own space, I think its a phase a lot of kids go through, the best thing to do is just allow them their time, they'll get there in the end. A lot of it requires patience, speaking from experience its a lot worse being on the sleeping in your parents room side. You feel like a baby and when confronted you can't help but feel embarrassed and become defensive (for anyone wondering why when approaching the subject their child seems angry, its not you they're angry with its themselves)
However if it persists in to mid teens like with me there's most likely a reason, especially if they stopped then started again. Personally I found myself being bullied and so I returned to old habits and a form of comfort and security.
I think this is a struggle for a lot of parents and children and I think people should be made more aware. From reading online we can infer that it's actually quite common. I know I found relief in knowing I wasn't the only one! So if your kid is feeling alone in it show them these comments and reassure them its more common than they think, like I said, they'll get there in the end.

May 13, 2016
It ends up getting better NEW
by: Anonymous

Reading a book helps and if u tire her out it will help if she has a sibling u could make them have to share a room

May 26, 2016
My brother is almost 16! NEW
by: Anonymous

My brother has been in my parents bed/room since the day he was born. He's now almost 16 and still sleeps on their floor. My dad is a shift worker and is beyond sick and tired of having to trip over the mattress on the floor every time he comes home from work. He hasn't slept alone with my mum for almost 16 years either and it is to say the least putting a massive strain on their marriage and our family. My brother has processing issues, in that his brain doesn't process things the way other kids brains do. He is so super testing it isn't funny and won't stay away from home at all. It's beginning to be a massive issue for all of his relationships with his friends and with us. It is like this will never end. He says he's not scared about it he just doesn't want to. Hopefully one day he will decide that it's time to move into his own room, I just hope it's before my parents relationship breaks down and the family is torn. Some people on here have said it's not a massive issue, but it is. It effects everything in my life and my families. I hope you all find answers to help you before you get to the stage we are.

May 29, 2016
HELP ME NEW
by: Anonymous

My sister is 12 years old, every since she was born she has never slept in her own room. When she was taken out of my parents room, when she was a baby, she would sleep in the same room as my sister as there were only a small amount of bedrooms in our house. When we moved house she got her own bedroom but would still sleep on my sisters trundle bed in her room. About 2 years ago she started sleeping in my room, I am 15 years old and since I have had her sleeping with me, when she has friends over and stays in her own room, I feel very aware that I am alone. This is not good for me because I have split parents and when I am at my dads I have to sleep by myself. My mum has bought my sister a fish, a new desk, a very expensive new bed, with my sister promising that when she gets all these new things she would promise to sleep in her room but when the time comes she decides that she no longer wants to do that and continues to sleep in my room. She has no nightmares, no fears and no reason to not sleep in her room by herself, it is just the fact that she has never tried and is way to scared to experience it. Someone please help me! I need some answers

Jun 02, 2016
II'm 14 and i can't sleep even with my sis!! NEW
by: Anxious and 14!

I need help!! in the night I get so anxious and I get this weird feeling in my stomach. it's not my period because its nearly every day! I used to be able to sleep in the basement with my younger sis. but now I can only sleep peacefully with my sis on a mattress in my parents room! I really don't know what to do, I checked with my doctor and got blood work done, but it was nothing!! I still continue to freak out when my parents give me deadlines about when to sleep alone. reading these blogs helped a little bit in calming me down, but now my dad took away my ipod because of it, and I'm just too paranoid and I feel like I'm getting anxiety attacks! Please.. I really need help and I don't think my parents would let me go for hypnotizing.....

Jun 03, 2016
I was and still am scared at times to sleep alone and im 29 NEW
by: Anonymous

Some ppl never think of the possibility of the paranormal and that of a child that is sensetive to it. I saw alot of stuff i could not explain when i was a child and always had a feeling of dread while alone at night in my room. I slept with my mom or sister and went through fazes where I was actually able to be alone at night. I blocked my sensitive side as best as I could... Here I am a grown woman and most nights I am fine but there is some nights even with my husband asleep beside me all I can feel is dread. My son is 11 and I also have a six year old that exibit the same thing.. They will not sleep in a room alone. As a parent It is your duty to protect your child whether it be from nothing at all or something they are sensing.You should NEVER spank, ignore or blow them off. You are there rock and if they are scared it is not some thing they can help. Whether they are sensitive or not it will remain with them their entire lives if you go to those extremes.. And I also have a 13 year old that has slept alone sense she was 3. But If my children are scared I pay attention and make it to where they don't need to be afraid. I wake most mornings to two exta kids in my bed although they all sleep in the living room together. But time will work out the issue I have hopes for that. Until then I just have a crowded living room lol.

Jun 03, 2016
I am one of them! NEW
by: Anonymous

I am almost 13 and I can't sleep alone. It's scary and I really need my mom with me otherwise I cry all night and don't get enough sleep. I used to love sleeping over but there was one incidence when I went to a sleepover and suddenly started missing my mom! Ever since that I have never slept alone! I really want to but I keep missing my mom since she has been with me more. After 2 days I am going to try again and we will see how that turns out to be!

Ps. It sucks! I can't tell my friends about it either! It really STINKS!


Jun 04, 2016
w NEW
by: Anonymous

13 WTF...just put her the fuck in bed and lock your door. it works after a couple of days.

Jun 04, 2016
a NEW
by: Anonymous

13 WTF...just put her the fuck in bed and lock your door. it works after a couple of days. even if she cries she fucking 13. my son started to sleep in his own room at age 4. my daughter on the other hand happened when she was 9. so i just locked my bedroom door and she never came in. she was crying but after a week it was worth it.

Jun 06, 2016
Son turning 11 NEW
by: Fred

Hi I have a boy turning 11 and still sneaks in at night it got so bad my wife will not sleep with me anymore .I think our marriage is done because of this , The only thing you can do is lock your door at night for a month it worked for me . He now sleeps in his own bed (Thank God) I was tickled it worked and he seems ok now sleeping by him self .But Wife like sleeping by him self as well !! guess I should have thought about that some time ago . Was thinking she would come back to our bed but sense January no Luck and no nucky as well...So
Get a lock for your door they will get over it and save your marriage .I wish someone told me this 5 years ago !!!!

Jun 06, 2016
took 10 years NEW
by: Fred

Hi I have a boy turning 11 and still sneaks in at night it got so bad my wife will not sleep with me anymore .I think our marriage is done because of this , The only thing you can do is lock your door at night for a month it worked for me . He now sleeps in his own bed (Thank God) I was tickled it worked and he seems ok now sleeping by him self .But Wife like sleeping by him self as well !! guess I should have thought about that some time ago . Was thinking she would come back to our bed but sense January no Luck and no nucky as well...So
Get a lock for your door they will get over it and save your marriage .I wish someone told me this 5 years ago !!!!

Jun 07, 2016
Sleeping NEW
by: Anonymous

I'm 15 years old. I go through spells where sleeping in my room alone is fine. And then there will be times where I sleep in my moms room for "1 night" because of a horror movie. One night turns to two, three, etc. I end up in her room for months. It's just once I start to try to sleep in my room again, I just lye awake wanting to leave.

Jun 21, 2016
I am 16 years old and still feel the same. NEW
by: Anonymous

Since my nan died four years ago I have been in the exact same position as everyone else. For the first 2 years I wouldn't spend one night on my own but then I gradually starting spending some nights on my own and thought that I was getting over this fear. I would check around my room around 3-10 times before I go to sleep, no idea what for, but it became habit.
Over the last 6 months, the fear grew back and my mother did not want me up worrying as I am/was going through the exam process so thought it was best to sleep with me. I now am attempting to sleep on my own but still find it hard to get to sleep and have to check my whole room at least twice. I have no clue how to get out of this mental mindset but hopefully slowly I will.

Jun 26, 2016
15 NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi, I'm 15 and I struggle to sleep, I have slept in my mums rooms since I was 6 or 7. I have awful anxiety and depression and due to my fathers death I have a fear of being away from my mum. I can sleep over a close friends but I have to be under the blanket. I hate it, I can't sleep a whole night with out waking up normally around three in the morning and not being able to sleep until sunrise.

Jun 27, 2016
I am 12, and this is new to me. NEW
by: Anonymous

I just started to have these problems. When i was younger, i would have awful migranes, so i would feel like im dying. my doctor believed that the reason i was having awful migranes was because i couldnt get enough restful sleep. because of this, he had me get my tonsils removed incase snoring was the problem. i dont know what it was, but i dont have migranes very much anymore, so something worked. but the reason i brought this up is because i had a reason for sleeping badly then. i do not now. i am a 12 year old girl, and it is currently about 4:00 am. i went to bed early, at about 11:00 pm. i dont know about everyone else, but thats early for me. i fell asleep at about 12:00, but woke up soon after. i would get little snipits of sleep every now and again, but not enough to feel rested. i, myself, tie this to my recent anixety attacks, my depression, and the fact that i am moving soon. i usually feel uncomfortable, or even like im not safe in my own bed. i will move my legs randomly, unable to get comfortable. i will sit up and hit my legs or cause myself some sort of physical pain so i can calm down. i will break down in tears and hug my cat, Kali. i want to talk to my mother, but she is sleeping so peacefully, and my 3 year old sister is sleeping in there right now. so internet! i need you! right now, i am in the living room, which i can sleep in just fine no matter what. its just my room. i need help. im afraid of my room, but i love it. im confused. i just want to be able to sleep soundy again. thank you all, because i thought i was childish and the only one. Thank you all!

Jun 29, 2016
I am 13 and can't get sleep NEW
by: Elizabeth

Sup, I am a 13 year old girl and at this moment I am writing this on my own bed in my room at I think one in the morning. For as long as I remember I would have this episodes were I would be alone in bed and can't go to sleep because I start hearing the smallest things and start scaring myself in the dark and I think it is absolutely stupid of me to be like this, but here I am. I have never told my parents about it since I don't believe they would take it seriously. So every now and then I just be laying in bed and all of a sudden I will start breathing heavier and getting scared of anything, even the smallest most meaningless noise. Not only that, but I can't sleep when I know everyone else is asleep. Of course I do manage to get some shut eye, but that's after keeping myself up in consent fear and panic until it's the break of dawn.

Jul 05, 2016
Can't sleep 11 years old NEW
by: Anonymous

I'm 11 and ever since I was 7 my little sister and I have shared a room. Now I'm 11 and we finally have the space to get our separate rooms due to our parents separating. I cannot sleep in a room without someone next to me. I have to get used to two new rooms and anxiety doesn't help. Please help me my mom says she will leave her door open but I must sleep in my own room. My dad says the same exact thing. Please please please help. I'm afraid because A. I'm not used to it B. I'm afraid if I have night terrors or sleep paralysis (I am a hypochondriac) no one will be there. (I have no history of either of these things it won't happen but I'm still scared) C. I don't even know! I have been crying and having anxiety attacks. Please help this hasn't happened ever.

Jul 07, 2016
See from our point of view NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi i am a 10 yr old and yes i still to this day sleep with my parents but u have to see it to our point of view. To us we have our fears for instance im scared of ghost so i say to myself every night if they ghost really wanted me it would've got me by now.
Ask your child has she seen something that shes scared of or in some cases children have walked in on parents and are too embarrassed to admite they just didnt want to see it again so they act like their scared so they make sure it wont happen again. If you think thats the case i would promise it wouldnt happen again but this is only a childs opion so ask your children whats there fear.

Jul 08, 2016
Sleeping Stress NEW
by: Help Me I struggle

I am a girl coming out of primary school and moving into high school! I am so afraid of my own room that every night I can't even shut my eyes in my own room, so I just walk straight into my mum and dads room, and sleep with my mum one night while my dad sleeps in my bed, and the next night i would sleep with my dad while my mum sleeps in my room. I feel really bad about this, it has been happening since last summer, before that I had it but it stopped, then one night, I just woke up and walked straight into my mum and dads room, I seem to have gotten into a pattern and its a bit like a hypnosis that I can't get out of. I have went to a psychologist 4 times but it never worked, I TRIED childline but they didn't work, I even got a hamster to have in my own room to help with company but she ended up having to sleep in her cage in the bathroom cause I just kept going into my mum and dads room! If you have any ideas on how I can stop this pattern and over come my fear then please tell me I hate having this problem, and I think I might be the only one!

Thanks -

Anonymous

Jul 09, 2016
My daughter is 18 and she cannot sleep alone. Please help me. NEW
by: Anonymous

Dear all,

my daughter is 18 years old and she cannot sleep alone. She used to share the bedroom with my older girl until my older daughter went aboard to college. So since 6 years my husband sleeps down on a mattress in her room whenever he is in town. He travels a lot and during those times my daughter sleeps alone without bothering me. but once he's back she wakes us up at 12 or 1 or 2am in the morning and asks him to sleep in her room.

This has resulted in a lot of misunderstanding between my husband and me and has also taken a toll on our marriage. I have prayed to God a lot and have made other offerings too. Now I have nearly given up finding a solution to this problem. As a last ray of hope I found this blog and am asking for help. Please help.

Jul 12, 2016
i use to have the same problem. NEW
by: angel

Hi. I am 14 hears old and had this problem when i was 8-12. I get really anxious when it comes to sleeping aloune. I get really bad dreams and struggle to breath when i wake up. My parents and i dont know why but what we do know is that there is a solution. In order for my fear of sleeping aloune to go away i use my radio to listen to the people talking. So when i wake up i can listen to the radio and relax.
but when it gets really bad and the radio doesnt work my mom puts calm instrumental music on to calm me down.(bring the heart rate down) i hope this works for your children the way it helped me.

Jul 14, 2016
Cant sleep. I am 18 years old NEW
by: Anonymous

I am 18 years old and i am afraid to sleep even with my brother near me. I know it weird as fuc. But i think about ghostly stuff. Thiefs. Murderes. Etc. I can only sleep when the sun rises up.

Jul 18, 2016
SAME SAME SAME NEW
by: O_O

Ok I am currently 14 but I'm going to turn 15 in a few weeks. Anyways my parents told me that when I was atleast 1 they thought it was too cold for me to just be sleeping in my crib that was next to a window so they brought me to their bed. BIGGEST MISTAKE. I AM STILL IN THEIR BED AND I CANT SLEEP IN MINE. I have tried so many times. And I just can't. I tried with 2 night lights and I still couldn't i would sneak into my parents room and sleep in the middle. I would also try with the tv on however I would end up doing an all nighter even if I didn't want to. It's just fear. Fear of ghost and other things. I'm a student who is in honors classes in high school and I also get very good grades and scores but still...I CANT SLEEP ALONE! I can't fall asleep by myself usually I have to have an adult with me in the room for me to fall asleep but I wake up a few min after scared that they left me. I calmed down when I saw that many people have this problem too. Still I would like to be able to sleep without my parents or anyone else,

Jul 22, 2016
Same here NEW
by: Anonymous

I'm 12 and I'm on my way to get myself out of the fear of sleeping alone, I still feel sacred in someways at night but I keep pushing and telling myself that nothing will happen and I'll be safe. I really think a blindfold at night will really help, it works extremely well for me.

Jul 25, 2016
My daughter is nearly 15 and can't sleep alone NEW
by: Anonymous

Having read everyone's comments, it is so reassuring to know that this is quite common. I have decided to stop fight over this, and just next to my daughter without any fuss or begging or tears, arguments etc. I think making a big issue of this (as we have done) just makes her feel worse about herself. She has friends, is doing great in school, however the sleep deprivation is making her ill quite often, she is just so tired. We have been to therapists buts the problem is still there, so my new approach is to say to her I understand that you are scared,so I am going to sleep next to you for as long as you need me to, and of story. Fingers crossed that she will grow out of it by the time she goes to UNI!!??

Aug 02, 2016
so reassuring NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi all, it's so reassuring to read all these comments, stretching over the last five years! My son is generally anxious, due to the fact that he has a life-threatening allergy to milk and therefore is afraid of so many new situations because if he eats/drinks the wrong thing, he could die. This has led to him being very dependent on me (mum). But he is so courageous - handled the difficult transition to high school and faces up to things that, to him, are really scary but probably aren't for other kids.

Anyway, he had always slept in his own bed until he turned 11 (although he always wanted someone to get up with him if he needed the bathroom in the night). Suddenly his body clock changed (apparently this is a common indication of puberty) and he literally couldn't get to sleep until two hours after his usual time. This happened overnight, and made him anxious because he would go to bed and then just not be able to sleep. Bedtimes became stressful for everyone and nobody was getting enough sleep or winding down time.
Eventually we let him sleep on a mattress in our bedroom, and instantly the problem went away. He goes to sleep easily and sleeps all night long without any problems. We all sleep better!
I do want him to go back to his own room, but my instinct is that it will happen when he's ready and, when you think about other cultures, lots of families all sleep together in the same room anyway. What's so wrong with wanting to be near someone?
I would like to add, though, that we make no attempt for him to be comfortable! He is sleeping on an old mattress that is too small and way too thin, but I point out that there is a perfectly comfortable bed in the next room if he wants it.
I do worry about him generally - don't we all, as parents, fret when our child is 'not like' other kids? But I suspect that the majority of these kids are, like mine, extremely sensitive, imaginative and creative. And we need these people in our world!
If he's still in our room in another year or two, we will start being firmer and using some of the techniques suggested on here.
But in the meantime, lets have the confidence to just love our kids and accept them for who they are

Aug 02, 2016
i'm 11 and i'm afraid to sleep alone NEW
by: Anonymous

Hello i'm 11 years old and can't sleep by myself,my fears make me stay awake, i cannot stay asleep with out someone around me,any human around me is nice
i'm scared of being watched whilst i sleep
and of theories about wal-mart, should i watch something for children ages 4-6 before going to bed?, should i tell my parents of these irrational fears should i try to stay positive whilst being aware of those lurking behind the iron walls of the government,please help

Aug 03, 2016
response to 11 year old above NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi there,
firstly, well done for finding your way to this discussion - it shows that you're already taking responsibility for handling your fears. So you're on the winning road already :)
Secondly, if you read through all the comments, you will notice that there seem to be an awful lot of 10-12 year olds who begin to struggle with this issue, even if they've been Ok up to now. Part of it is to do with growing up, and it sounds like you have a good imagination - which means that if you can imagine bad things, like being watched, then you can imagine good things too. Our thoughts are very powerful, but they can bully us if we let them.
Remember, there is no actual danger in your room at nght - you are perfectly safe. It's the THOUGHTS that are the problem. And you are the boss of your thoughts.
Do you read at all? If so, why not try reading a book (nothing scary) until your eyes are so heavy you can barely stay awake. And then when you do put the book down, just think about the story instead.
Do you get on OK with your parents? If so, I'm sure the best thing is to talk to them about your fears. Somehow when you share a fear with someone you trust, it gets smaller because you're not carrying it on your own.
And you know now that there are lots of other children across the world who have the same issues. You are not alone!

Aug 03, 2016
Im 19 and having sleeping alone issues NEW
by: Anonymous

Hello, Im a 19 year old girl who, well, as embarassing as it is, cant sleep alone. Now hear me out, I've been sleeping alone since I was 15. However, recently, in January, my uncle passed away, and I had severe difficulty sleeping alone after that, because I was very attached. I still slept alone. Then 5 months later my grandmother passed away. The fear increased, but I still slept alone. However mid-may I had a very bad panic attack around 4 am and started balling and had to call my dad to come get me from my room. That night I slept in my parents room and since then Ive had sleep anxiety when it comes to sleeping alone. I promised myself I'd be back to sleeping alone in no time. However, a week and a half ago, my cousin who was like a brother to me I love him so much, passed away at night in his sleep for no reason at all. While my uncle says he was passed out on a chair, with vomit dripping out of his nose (saying that he choked on it) my aunt (his mom) says he was asleep. Either way, now my problem has intensified SO BAD. I also got PTSD which explains night terrors, but Ive also grown up wanting privacy. At night at least. And I feel awkward as fuck having my parents sleep in my room or vice-versa (my parents say I have 1 more month to work this out) but I doubt therapy is even going to help. I keep thinking some spirit or jinn, or the angel of death is going to snatch my soul away. Or I'll see morbid images or something paranormal. And also, my room is all alone upstairs while my parents is downstairs. I cant get a room closer to theirs because there is none. Any help or reassurances? I would really like some comfort and response.

Aug 03, 2016
Im 19 and having sleeping alone issues NEW
by: Anonymous

Hello, Im a 19 year old girl who, well, as embarassing as it is, cant sleep alone. Now hear me out, I've been sleeping alone since I was 15. However, recently, in January, my uncle passed away, and I had severe difficulty sleeping alone after that, because I was very attached. I still slept alone. Then 5 months later my grandmother passed away. The fear increased, but I still slept alone. However mid-may I had a very bad panic attack around 4 am and started balling and had to call my dad to come get me from my room. That night I slept in my parents room and since then Ive had sleep anxiety when it comes to sleeping alone. I promised myself I'd be back to sleeping alone in no time. However, a week and a half ago, my cousin who was like a brother to me I love him so much, passed away at night in his sleep for no reason at all. While my uncle says he was passed out on a chair, with vomit dripping out of his nose (saying that he choked on it) my aunt (his mom) says he was asleep. Either way, now my problem has intensified SO BAD. I also got PTSD which explains night terrors, but Ive also grown up wanting privacy. At night at least. And I feel awkward as fuck having my parents sleep in my room or vice-versa (my parents say I have 1 more month to work this out) but I doubt therapy is even going to help. I keep thinking some spirit or jinn, or the angel of death is going to snatch my soul away. Or I'll see morbid images or something paranormal. And also, my room is all alone upstairs while my parents is downstairs. I cant get a room closer to theirs because there is none. Any help or reassurances? I would really like some comfort and response.

Aug 04, 2016
to the 19 year old NEW
by: Anonymous

if you're 19, could you stay up until your parents go to bed?
Also, it might help to talk to someone about it - you've obviously been through some very traumatic events and counselling would probably help. There's no need to struggle alone.
If you believe in supernatural beings to the extent that they are troubling you, then why not think about God or angels instead?

Aug 07, 2016
Same problem NEW
by: Anonymous

I am 13 and I still sleep in my parents room and so does my 15 year old brother (who has autism) but he sleeps on the extra bed. I am terrified to sleep on my own without my mom and I know why it is because I feel unsafe without her by my side and I don't want anything to happen like a robbery or fire and her not right there to get me right away. My mom was away for 2 nights and normally I go to bed around 11:00, but these past two nights I did not go to sleep till about 12:30-1:00. I was terrified and started to panic without her. And I couldn't get my dad cause he was asleep. But I feel as I mature I will get better but we will see.

Aug 10, 2016
I really need help. NEW
by: Anonymous

I am 13 years old just like your daughter and i have the same exact problem...I use to be able to sleep alone fine until this summer. After i came back from summer vacation i had serious jet lag and i was always afraid of sleeping alone. my mum sleeps with me every single night and i'm starting to get sick of it. I want to be able to sleep alone but everytime i lay in my bed i start to freak out and i don't even know why. i wake up in the middle of the night every single night and start to panic cause i'm alone and i have to wake up my mum so she can come and sleep with me. i've talked to my friends and family and they were very supportive (which i am already appreciative about) but they all say the same thing and it doesn't really help. I'm starting to worry about sleeping 24/7 that my school grades are starting to drop and i can't focus on life anymore. I don't really want to use medicine to fall asleep cause i know i can't rely on meds my whole life. Any tips to falling asleep when i suddenly wake up in the middle of the night? Thanks

Aug 11, 2016
I still stay in my moms room NEW
by: Anonymous

I am 11 and a girl and I have been staying in my own room, but sometimes if its hot, or it a weekend or something like that I stay in my moms room and I feel like a baby. She still needs to tuck me in. I get really really super stressed out about sleeping and then I get so worked up. I always think what if I can't sleep. I'm so scared some bad person will come in my room at night. When I'm in my moms room I feel like she can protect me more. I also hate being the last one up. Any advice? I don't want to be the only one of my friends sleeping in my moms bed. Thanks

Aug 18, 2016
I need help I need to a solution NEW
by: Anonymous

I'm a 16 and I can't sleep alone. I haven't been able to sleep alone since the 5th grade (10). I was one day watched this tv show on paranormal actives and that's what stared my fear. Every since then I have had to sleep with my sister. My sister hates having to sleep with me but every time she told me she wasn't going to sleep with me I would have a full blown panic attack. It became really bad after I myself have experience paranormal active in my house and in my room. We once tried me and my sister sharing a room with 2 different beds. That worked for about 2 weeks until I started freaking out again. I've come to the point where I don't know what to do. I've had to sleep myself for the past 2 days and I've had several panic attacks. I really want to be able to sleep alone and not have to depened on my sister sleeping with me to be able to sleep. I just need to find a solution. Everytime I try or even think about sleeping alone I'm over come with fear I don't know what to do

Aug 21, 2016
Mine is 10 .. NEW
by: Anonymous

I am at the end of my rope. 10 years of extreme neediness, and hours each night just trying to get her to sleep in her own bedroom. Numerous therapists and medications haven't helped. I cannot express how difficult this is for me and how much my whole family is adversely affected. My husband is just angry every night, and after she's worn me out with her neediness all day- I'm the same. I love her but there is no happiness

Aug 27, 2016
I'm going through the same thing NEW
by: Anonymous

I'm in sorta the same situation, I can sleep alone in my room but I can't fall asleep easily without someone with me. When I was a child I would always figure out ways to get to sleep with my parents I often fake cried etc. But now that I'm older (in my teens) they don't allow me to sleep with them anymore. What j did to help me with sleep was get a night light and place it somewhere it can illuminate the whole room. Maybe get a large stuffed animal like those big bears from target or something, this way it might feel like someone's there and that may be comforting. Also if they have a phone play some soothing noises like the ocean or something so it's not quiet or maybe keep a fan on during night. Also block off any possible spots that might scare them in the night, ex. I have a closet with no door and it starts to slant down leaving a place someone could possibly be hiding so I filled that with stuff. That's all I really have for suggestions I hope it helps😊

Sep 07, 2016
I can't sleep alone, and without a light NEW
by: Anonymous

So, I have a problem. How am I supposed to sleep without these things? For my whole life, I have not been able to sleep alone, and it has destroyed me. I have ruined part of my vacation, because I wake up at 3 pm and fall asleep at 4 or 5 am. My parents do not like this and even when they do they cannot allow me to turn the light on. I really need some help, thank you.

Sep 11, 2016
Anxious 14 year old NEW
by: Tired mum

My 14 year old daughter has slept well for most of her life until recently. She fears that she wont be able to get to sleep and the worrying keeps her awake. Or if she does get to sleep she often wakes early hours of the morning unable to get back to sleep. She normally sleeps so well, however when she was staying at her dads house a few months ago they got home to find they had been burgled so I think the sleep problen stems from that. Any advice would be welcomed


Sep 21, 2016
Me too NEW
by: Anonymous

Yeah, I'm one of those. Every time I try to sleep by myself I can't. I will stay awake until I am with somebody and then if they leave me, I would wake up and then go into the bed with them. I'm turning 12 soon and I hope it will pass by soon. It is always hectic at night because I don't know where I am going to sleep and I have anxiety about school and now where I am sleeping. I hope I can outgrow it. At least I know now that I am not the only one with this problem.

Sep 25, 2016
Same problem with me NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi! I have the same problem. I am 13 and I still don't dare to sleep alone. I watched a scary movie and I can't sleep even if someone is there. Do you have any advice??

Sep 26, 2016
14 Years old and Struggling NEW
by: Anonymous

I'm unsure of what the right thing to be doing is. I've needed someone I care about to sleep next to me for a while, that was until this summer when my parents really forced me to sleep by myself. I felt alone, but eventually I was able to sleep alone for about a month, and then I relapsed so hard that it's become a cycle: I can't sleep for a few days and then for about a week I'll sleep fine. The past week and a half I've been able to sleep 9 hours each night by myself. I had a routine, but then last night I couldn't fall asleep at all. Whenever that happens I completely forget reason and all of the times I slept by myself. I'm just waiting for the moment I get over this again, I'm hoping it's tonight because I'm exhausted.

I know the underlying problem. I'm not afraid for the same reasons I believe it's because of my past. I tried talking to my parents about it, but they brushed it off. Should I try talking to a therapist?

Anyway, I'm glad to hear that I'm not alone. It calms my anxiety. At the moment I'm really anxious. The next time this happens, I'd like to get out of it quickly.

I don't know if there's anyone here that's willing to respond to this and help me. If there is, then please, tell me how I can get rid of this anxiety.

The underlying cause is that I've always had my parents with me through such a traumatic time that I'm scared to leave them at night where my mind is the most active.

Sorry if this was long. I'm glad that I'm getting at least some sleep. My worst fear about this is that I will perish.

But for those who might need help, I do have some suggestions:

Establish a routine (I always exercise and then I watch relaxing videos on my phone)

Thinking about something happy or not looking at the clock helps. And knowing that you'll be okay no matter if you sleep or don't helps me too.

Also, here's one thing I realized that might help everyone, YOUR BODY WILL NOT GET USED TO SLEEPING SO LITTLE. It won't allow that.

Thank you, everyone. I know it sounds ridiculous that I have these set of rules but I can't listen to my head right now. Please still help me.

Sep 26, 2016
It's happened to me NEW
by: Anonymous

I am almost 13, and I can't sleep alone. My mom and dad would ground me, take my phone away, and even threaten to tell my friends that I can't sleep alone. I don't know why. I get horrified when I hear anything. I just feel safer when somebody's next to me. Some nights I go into my moms room and sleep on the floor. My parents think it's uncommon, I am a normal girl, I play tennis, cheerleader, and I am in art club. I don't know why. Help me please!!! D=

Sep 27, 2016
I experience this and it affects me NEW
by: Anonymous 11 year old

I am an 11 year old girl and I have problems sleeping.... One day when I was about 6 my mom went away for the weekend, I cried even though my dad was beside me... I can only sleep if :
I'm with my sister, mum, or one of my brothers... Whenever I'm trying to sleep in a room with my other brother or dad i just can't... One night my mom was late coming home and I cried, i was begging for someone to sleep with me... I don't know what it is but it makes me feel unsafe, I am aloud keep a TV on and it's starting to help... but only a bit, If i had all the lights on in the room I would still be anxious... My mom gives out to me because she doesn't understand my pain... :(
I don't know why I get scared but my mom will shout saying "EVERY OTHER GIRL IS IN HER OWN ROOM ASLEEP BY NOW!" and "WHY ARE YOU SCARED? CAN YOU NOT ME? I HAVE WORK TOMORROW!" (She doesn't normally give out she just gets tired) Is this like some sorta thing that some kids get? I wouldn't know really :(.... I wish my mom understood...

Sep 27, 2016
13 year old cannot sleep alone NEW
by: Anonymous

I am that mother and my husband is that father who has been frustrated by the anxiety our daughter faces every night going to bed. We have tried therapy, medication and herbal treatment and nothing seems to work. My daughter is a very strong willed child with a heart of gold. And yes, she has separation anxiety. And yes, she sleeps with her sister, and if her sister is not home, she wants me to sleep with her. Its embarrassing for her and its her little secret. But she will grow out of it. She just is not ready yet. I remember a pediatrician once said about potty training....I have never seen a young healthy adult in diapers. She will gain confidence one day and say enough is enough. Good luck to all the children out there who suffer quietly hoping no one finds out. Don't give up.

Oct 01, 2016
I have the problem NEW
by: Anonymous

it's weird I haven't had the problem until just this year but my anxiety skyrockets whenever I have to go to sleep. I live with my grandparents and am 17. I typically wait until grandma goes to bed around midnight because she doesn't like me having to sleep in her bed I am literally unable to fall asleep without her or someone around me. if she leaves I wake up within the hour. i used to take melatonin but it didn't always work. I have nightmares when I'm alone too. I get the not wanting to talk to someone it really does make you feel crazy. the melatonin tablet worked for awhile for me, but the nightmares were still there. do you know if she remembers them? I don't. I'm aware I'm rambling so I'll try to get to my point. let her know she's not alone, feeling crazy because of it sucks so when I saw this it made me feel less crazy and less alone. maybe ask a perfessional in her behalf to see what may help. I hope this helped a little just knowing she's not alone.

Oct 03, 2016
Im 18 and in desperate need of advice NEW
by: Anonymous

Im 18 years old nearly 19 and still cannot sleep alone, however this is only the case at night. If I'm home alone i can go and take day time naps alone in my own bed with no issues but as soon as it goes dark its impossible, i begin to sweat cry and shake. Im completely humiliated and ashamed of myself that I have to sleep in the same room as my parents, if i have my boyfriend or friends round i can sleep in my room. The issue completely lies sleeping alone at night. I need help, therapy, anything.

Oct 04, 2016
I'm twelve and I have this problem NEW
by: Anonymous

I am 12 and I hate horror movies! I made the mistake of watching 'Miss Peregrine's home for peculiar children" the other day and I regret it! 3 days later I'm terrified to sleep and it's taking a toll on me. I live in AUS and my break between Term3&4 is about to finish next week, I need to be able to sleep properly then. Any ideas on how to stop this anxiety?

Oct 16, 2016
Sleep NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi, I'm 11 turning 12 and I have a the exact same problem. I've never been to a sleepover because of my anxiety not even camp which makes me scared because I'm going to a school were it is compulsory to go on camp. My parents I felt have given up on me and have become really scary. Parents don't give up on your child, make them feel safe no matter how long you have tried. Don't make your child want to hate themselves. Just give them time and they should grow out of it, that has not happened to me but I sure it will. Hitting puberty will probably help them sleep in there own bed. Always check on your child and help them stay postive. There is always hope. Please don't scream at them be as kind as you can. Take them to a doctor or work on getting them a close friend to lay down with if they struggle going to sleepovers or camps. If they have a sibling get them to share a room for a while to get them used to not being with you every night. Focus on them for a while and getting them to sleep in there own bed. Try to avoid doing things with your partner for a while, that was a BIG problem for me. Don't show them scary movies or rude shows or movies.Please do these things and your child will be in there own bed in. No time.

Oct 19, 2016
I'm 16 with similar problems NEW
by: Anonymous

I've read so many of the comments and can't help but notice I have a similar problem but at the same time I don't. I am sixteen years old and still cannot sleep on my own. I'm not afraid of the dark and don't get scared at strange noises or dark corners, but I simply cannot sleep on my own. I've been diagnosed with anxiety and feel ill when alone. Before I could sleep with someone sat next to me but now I can't even sleep without someone laying next to me. If anyone has any idea on how to help, please share. It's a bit more embarrassing for a sixteen year old than a 13 year old. :)

Oct 20, 2016
don't worry NEW
by: Anonymous

To those young people who have had the courage to post on here recently, don't be hard on yourself and don't feel ashamed or weird. Anxiety takes many, many forms. Just because other people don't have the same fears/difficulties that you do, it doesn't mean they don't struggle with other hidden worries. Everyone is different and there is really no such thing as 'normal'. It's just our perception that everyone else is fine and we're not.

As a parent of such a young man, I think the most important thing is to talk to your parents about your fears and let them know that you just need acceptance and support. If you want to overcome this, do it together - little by little, with encouragement all the way. If you just need a rest from the struggle and stress, ask them to help you think of a way that you can sleep in a room with someone else (sibling or parent, or perhaps have the radio on low so you feel you have company). As I've said before, in so many cultures of the world, the whole family sleeps together in the same room and it's unheard of for anyone to sleep on their own. It's human to want company nearby, especially at night.

And if you don't want to go on sleepovers, so what? It's more difficult for a school trip where you're expected to go, but then at least you would be sleeping in a room with other people, not alone, and a quiet word with the teacher from your parents will be very helpful. My daughter won't go on sleepovers, not because she's afraid but because she actually prefers to sleep completely alone in the dark, so when there's a sleepover, she goes till about midnight and then I pick her up for a decent night's sleep. Let's face it, the best part about a sleepover is chilling in your pjs beforehand, not lying awake at 4am feeling fed up because you can't sleep.

Celebrate who you are. I am pretty sure that if you are sensitive like this, you are probably a creative, thoughtful person with a marvellous imagination. The world needs people like you :)


Oct 21, 2016
Hope This Helps NEW
by: Mango

Hi! It feels good that I'm not alone in this. I'm an 11 year girl and terrified of sleeping in my own room even if someone is in the room. But lately I have been sleeping early when the sun is still. Up or when people are awake this helps me so much and I suggest having a calming night time routine for ex spend a few min meditating or just spending time with pets.. Hope this helped


Oct 25, 2016
wont sleep NEW
by: dominique

ill try to get my mom to try it out

Oct 31, 2016
Help me!!!!! NEW
by: Girl

Same I'm 12 and it's almost midnight and I'm scared and I'm im my room I'm going to go to my moms room and sleep in a extra bed that's in there cuz I'm to scare

Someone plzzz I'm begaing u help me 😭😭😭

Nov 02, 2016
Sleep NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi, I'm a young teen going through the same thing as your daughter. I can fall asleep alone, but not in my own room. I had horrible nightmares and relate them to my room at night. Plus, if I was in my own room I'd wake up in the middle of the night and go into my parents room eventually. So, every night I try to fall asleep, hear a noise or have a scary thought, and then go into my parent's room.

Nov 02, 2016
RANDOM STUFF!!! NEW
by: Anonymous

Who's here in 2016!!!

Nov 11, 2016
14 yo son can't sleep alone NEW
by: Anonymous

We have been going through this since summer ended and school started because my son and daughter would do sleepovers in each others rooms. But once school started - i told them they had to sleep in their own room so in the morning they would get ready for school on their own. My son had and is still having the hardest time. I've always tried to make sure they sleep in their own room (not mine), so i took a spot on the floor and slept while he slept (my husband would grab me when he went to bed). Slowly i didn't have to sleep in his room, just be upstairs in my room, and promise to check on him. Right now we are at that stage sleeping with the lights on. i'm hoping it gets better, and reading these posts - it seems it will. Another thing - if he has a restless night and keeps coming into my room - i have a side couch i will let him sleep on (but this is in the middle of the night). i need my sleep too!!

Nov 13, 2016
Relateable NEW
by: Anonymous

My brother is also 13 and he needs my mother to lay on his bottom bunk. she eventually sneaks out though. I, on the other hand, hate sleeping by myself and I am 16. When sleeping alone it seems like ALL the negative thoughts that could possibly come into my mind, do. My paranoia also fires up. Most nights its my brother, my mom, and I sleeping in the same bed. xD ahhhh

Nov 17, 2016
I'm 16 AN daughter terrified NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi all

I'm a 16 year old, and I am petrified of being on my own. I am in my bed, and i stress out. I hear a slight creak in the hallway and I think someone is coming up stairs. It is getting really bad, i sleep infront of my parents room on the floor and they don't know. I have been waiting to grow out of this since i,was 5. If anyone has any suggestions please help.

Nov 27, 2016
17 & can't sleep NEW
by: Anonymous

JuSt recently Ive noticed that I can't stay asleep without my mom being in the bed. My mom is divorced and we practically share a room and have been for about my whole life on and off. I can sleep without her because I know she'll be coming to bed soon. But if she gets up and leaves for a long period (to bathroom/to watch tv/go to work) and is not in room, I wake up- in and out of sleep. We are about to move and I'll be in my own room. But I don't think I can sleep good without her. Is this small anxiety ? How can I change this?

I can sleep over others houses, but it's always someone there as well. I'm good socially and in school and I'm not scared of any paranormal forces.. I just can't sleep good without her. How can I get rid of this sleep dependency?

Nov 27, 2016
14 years old and still cant sleep alone... NEW
by: Anonymous

to the 12 and 13 year olds out there, listen, im 14 and cant sleep alone. i cry and beg not tomakw me sleep alone. i do have anxiety about it and it gets so bad i hear things and feel things touching me. i get so scared. i hate it. my mother and father think im crazy and will sometimes tell me "you're 14, get in bed and go to sleep" but its not that easy. i lay awake and dont go to sleep until late the next night even when i have school the next morning. by about 2:30 in the morning i have woke up about 5-6 times terrified and go to my parents room to sleep. i wish my parents would take me to a doctor tbh because i feel im a big problem and i thnk i actually need help.

Nov 27, 2016
14 years old and still cant sleep alone... NEW
by: Anonymous

to the 12 and 13 year olds out there, listen, im 14 and cant sleep alone. i cry and beg not tomakw me sleep alone. i do have anxiety about it and it gets so bad i hear things and feel things touching me. i get so scared. i hate it. my mother and father think im crazy and will sometimes tell me "you're 14, get in bed and go to sleep" but its not that easy. i lay awake and dont go to sleep until late the next night even when i have school the next morning. by about 2:30 in the morning i have woke up about 5-6 times terrified and go to my parents room to sleep. i wish my parents would take me to a doctor tbh because i feel im a big problem and i thnk i actually need help.

Nov 27, 2016
14 years old and still cant sleep alone... NEW
by: Anonymous

to the 12 and 13 year olds out there, listen, im 14 and cant sleep alone. i cry and beg not tomakw me sleep alone. i do have anxiety about it and it gets so bad i hear things and feel things touching me. i get so scared. i hate it. my mother and father think im crazy and will sometimes tell me "you're 14, get in bed and go to sleep" but its not that easy. i lay awake and dont go to sleep until late the next night even when i have school the next morning. by about 2:30 in the morning i have woke up about 5-6 times terrified and go to my parents room to sleep. i wish my parents would take me to a doctor tbh because i feel im a big problem and i thnk i actually need help.

Nov 29, 2016
help needed? NEW
by: Johanna

Dear worried mothers\ fathers and children.

I am 32 by now. I have been in the same situation. And I have studied psychology.I have the idea I have seen the ins and outs and understand the effects. I feel for you because I know what its been like. It is a topic close to my heart.
I am willing to help you. You can contact me and skype me if you need\want to.
Best, Johanna

Nov 29, 2016
Sleep can be hard NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi my name is Rachel and I am 12 I have a very cool room but I can't sleep in it it all started when I was younger and when I was sick I would sleep with my parents and I just kept continuing and I sleep at my parents every night my problem is I'm scared that everybody's gonna fall sleep before me and I'll be up all night and then I have night terrors and I just get so scared and it's almost like anxiety with my mom and I wanted to stop because a I want to have sleepovers but I can't because I freak out and start to cry and I really need help but I don't know how to do it

Nov 29, 2016
Sleep can be hard NEW
by: Rachel

Hi it's Rachel again how do I contact you Joanna I need your help please

Nov 29, 2016
Sleep can be hard NEW
by: Rachel

Hi Joanna I'm Rachel and I'm 12 I would love to get your help but I don't know how to contact you so I would really like your help please

Nov 29, 2016
e-mail NEW
by: Johanna

Hi Rachel,

of course. Send a mail to askafriendtoday@posteo.net

Best, Johanna

Nov 29, 2016
Sleep can be hard NEW
by: Rachel

Thank you so so much

Nov 29, 2016
Sleep can be hard NEW
by: Rachel

Thank you so so much

Nov 30, 2016
Please help NEW
by: Anonymous

Hello my name is Morgan and I can't sleep by myself I have an amazing room but I've been sleeping with my mom for over four years and I really need help because it's so so stressful I have night terrors and more of my problems are I'm scared that I'll be the only one up and the rest I don't know I need someone to talk to I'm almost 13 and I need help I can't have sleepovers I can't go to any camps so all I need is help if anyone can help me please contact me Morgan

Dec 01, 2016
I still do too NEW
by: Anonymous

I'm 12 and I'm in the same boat. I can never sleep without my sister or my mom always making sure knowone is near my bed. I will wake up in the middle of the night and go to my sisters room and don't know maybe she is watching that side of he bed and I'm watching this side. Idk I need help.

Dec 01, 2016
support NEW
by: Johanna

@ Rachel and possible others. If you dont mail me I cant help you. I dont want to share my skypename etc on a public site
Good luck

Dec 01, 2016
How NEW
by: Anonymous

I went on that e mail and website it's not for helping people like us

Dec 01, 2016
Help NEW
by: Johanna

To the annonymus person who commented last. I never got an e-mail from anyone. Did you send any? you could try to send a mail to: happy.netz@web.de instead.
THe website was just a try-out of a project, which is not even finished. Its not at all related to
a) my profession
b) I didnt share it here, because it has nothing to do with this.
This was just an offer to help. I dont need to do that. this is my free time and people usually pay me money to get helped. Good luck.

Dec 02, 2016
Sleep can be hard NEW
by: Rachel

Hey Johanna it's Rachel I have tried the first website and it didn't really work but I'm gonna email you and I would love to get your help if you can do that for me

Dec 02, 2016
Sleep NEW
by: Morgan

Can you give us your number so we can talk better

Dec 05, 2016
How do I help myself? NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi... I know this is a little late, but I'm 12 and cannot sleep by myself at all. I sleep with my brother (who has autism) and even sometimes then, I CANNOT sleep. I have a very vivid imagination and I often find myself thinking very far ahead into the future, into college, into my first apartment, into my husband's first job where he has to leave. I cannot stop thinking about things that might happen in the future... I have tried reassuring myself that I will grow out of it, but this has been happening every day and I'm so scared of the dark, mirrors, and any sudden loud noises... I have talked to my friends who told me that sometimes forcing yourself to fall asleep alone works, bi to have tried that and it hasn't worked at all for me... I just moved from my home of 9 years, and I cannot find myself falling behind in school.. is this something I should tell my parents about and see if I need mental or medical health? Please help me... I'm so scared about my future

Dec 06, 2016
I am here to help NEW
by: April

Hi I'm April I can help everybody on this site a little bit for the girl who recently replied you don't want to force yourself to sleep it'll just make things worse you want to try and ease into things and you don't want to worry about your future I too had problems like this but it wasn't my future i was me trying to sleep alone just stop worrying if you have to sleep with your parents sleep with your parents if there's anything to help you sleep at your parents calm down and then eventually you can start sleeping with somebody and then in the middle the night they will leave and then you wake up in your own bed and then you can start waking up in your own bed so what I want to do is help I want everybody to just relax you can talk to people about it that helps and also you just need to stay calm more ways that you can fall sleep on your own are getting warm showers and just like I said relaxing and staying positive

Dec 14, 2016
II will help you to sleep tonight call me 754 366 1519 I will be your friend in your time of need sweetheart NEW
by: Anonymous

I will help you sleep tonight and every night with you I will be your friend and comfort you in your time of need call me and we can talk about what makes you Happy and secure at night to go to sleep peacefully Michael 754 366 1519 I give you my blessing tonight sweetheart

Dec 16, 2016
Ugh NEW
by: Anonymous

I'm 15 and I have the hardest time sleeping on my own, but I've found that if you have a nice warm body pillow nest to you it really helps. I have sleep anxiety and would rather sleep with someone but that's usually not an option.

Dec 28, 2016
HELP ME PLZ!!! IM 16 NEW
by: Anonymous

omg i have an disability where i cant sleep without having sex first :/ i didn't even know something like that existed. plz help me its horrible and having sex before i sleep isn't usually an option. plz reply if u have an idea for me im 16.

Dec 29, 2016
Ok listen NEW
by: Anonymous

You should not have sex your 16 not in your late 20s or older if you have had sex that's nasty your 16

Dec 29, 2016
Sue NEW
by: Anonymous

Who are you haviing sex with

Dec 29, 2016
X NEW
by: Anonymous

Michael I don't know if I can trust you

Dec 29, 2016
What NEW
by: Anonymous

So you Michael ) want to have sex with the girl that needs to have sex so she can sleep

Jan 01, 2017
Help , 13 NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi I'm 13 and i need help ! My mom has been sleeping with me sunset I was around 7 because of my dad's snoring. And I got used to it and now I feel like such an idiot as I turned 13 and my family won't stop teasing me. In the day I feel confident and in the night I freak out. And I really need some advise , please I really want to feel ok with myself again.

Jan 02, 2017
Lost and Fustrated NEW
by: Fustrated and Disgusted

My bpyfriend's daughter sleeps with him whenever she comes over which is quite often and it has been 3 1/2 years. Not because she is scared but because she is a spoiled child who always gets her way. I have to sleep alone every night since he works 3rd shift except for the weekends sometimes and it is so awkward. She even has her own room even when she has friends over she still has to be in our bedroom and he doesn't say a word to her. She seems to control her dad and he always gives into her. Is this normal?

Jan 05, 2017
🤠🤠🤠 NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi,
I'm 13 and I can't bear to sleep alone. Every night I sleep with my mom. I have never went to a peditrician or anything, because to be overloaded with narcotics to go to sleep seems wrong. I have heard night lights, and white noise machines help. Good luck 😀

Jan 06, 2017
I have problems too NEW
by: Anonymous

I'm 12 years old and I was fine with sleeping until early November 2016. It takes me hours to fall asleep and I frequently wake up and cant get back to sleep. I usually fall asleep around 11pm but I wake up early such as 3-4 am (today was 9pm-2.40am) and I can never fall asleep again. I'm really scared of my parents going to bed before me and I have to have music or TV on downstairs. I also usually go sleep in my mums room. I'm so glad I'm not the only one with this problem and I hope it ends soon.

Jan 08, 2017
me to NEW
by: chase

I have problems sleeping to its not fun at all

Jan 10, 2017
Sleepless NEW
by: Anonymous

I cant understand the pain as my pain is much more deeper

Jan 10, 2017
Disturbd relations NEW
by: Anonymous

I have a sister in law who is currently 28 yrs old and who cant sleep alone at night. So much tat she sleeps with me n my husband in our bedroom. If alone, she sleeps with her brother. It s too annoying thing to share bedroom n bed with her.

Jan 11, 2017
11yr old friend needs help! NEW
by: Jake

Hi everyone, so my super close friend just opened up to me about his problem with sleeping alone. He explained to me that he hasn't been sleeping alone or has been sleeping alone in alot of fear, things like that for 6-7yrs. He says he can't sleep without at least one of his parents, or siblings (all are older than him) He says when he was younger, he had no choice but to watch scary movies with his siblings, (like final destination, paranormal activity, chernobyl diaries) and now whenever he sleeps he always gets reminders of those monsters, ghosts etc. We are in grade 6, so we have a 3 day trip in a couple months, he says his parents are forcing him to go and is really worried.

I've been with him since kindergarten, and now that I look back, he has changed alot throughout the years I've been with him. I feel that because of these scary movies, etc, he has become waaayy more cautious about everything. Anxiety buildup, maybe? After his 7th or 8th birthday thats when he started to back out on volunteering for things. Like door holder or something like that.

After grade 3, him and I were chosen to be in gifted classes, our school didnt have one, so we had to change schools. Starting from grade 4 he was completely quiet, never raising his hands, getting distracted sometimes. Our teacher had explained to us that since they have higher expectations on how you problem-solve in gifted class, an A in a normal class is actually an A- or a B+ in gifted classes.

Once we got our first report cards, he told me his parents freaked out, big time. Then they decided to be hard on him, and finally this is where his sleep problem/anxiety issues started to impact him horribly.

Now, he says he can sleep well with the help of mobile electronics, and watching things to calm him down and distract him from getting visions of scary stuff. But his parents don't approve.

Can you guys please help him? I'm worried for him, this will be a huge embarrassment for him at the 3 day trip. He is a popular and very good kid, he is nice to everyone and encourages nice things. He refuses to go to sleepovers with friends, even me! Thats how bad it is!!! Pleeeeaaaseee helllpppp!!!!

Jan 11, 2017
I'm not alone! NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi everybody,
This is my first time on this blog but I can now see that i am not alone. For the past two(ish) years I've had to sleep with my mom occasionally(I got scared about losing family members and my dad would let me sleep with her.) Near my birthday 13th birthday, about six monthes ago, something happened that really made things hard. I would cry every night and my parents would let me sleep with my mom. Recently they decided that i had too try and sleep in my room, my dad sits with me until I fall asleep but then he is tired in the morning. One of my teachers showed us a video that really disturbed me and I get scared whenever I think about it, for the past two nights I need my mom to stay up reading a book and my dad in my room until I am asleep. My whole family is getting tired and I start to feel bad which makes me more stressed. I do worry about my marks but not too much and I have some friends. I havn't lost anybody in my life(besides both of my great-grandparents) and my parents are always nice to me. I know that I am causing a big problem and I need help? I am just scared to sleep alone, any advice?

Jan 14, 2017
So relieved NEW
by: Anonymous

My son is 12 & has never really been able to sleep alone. He can't tell me why he is afraid but he needs to sleep with one parent at least. I have forced to him go to school camps, which he worried about weeks in advance. He won't attend friends sleep overs & won't even stay with grandparents of cousins etc... I know he is embarrassed by this but says he can't help it. Starts to get anxious around 6-7pm if he thinks he will be alone. I'm so pleased to read so many others have the same problem. I'm hoping it will just resolve one day in its own. He is anxious at times, but comes across as a very popular confident boy who is well liked by his peers. His sister who is 10 is fine but is starting to feel like she is missing out when she finds him sleeping with a parent. It becoming exhausting with 3 in the bed. Even a mattress on the floor doesn't cut it!

Jan 16, 2017
. NEW
by: Anonymous

I just turned fifteen and I too have the same issue, when I was younger my mom would sleep in my bed until I was around 9 or 10 and she made it clear that I was a big girl and I had to sleep on my own. I did not like this at all, so she said that at around five or later in the a.m., I could go to her room. (I would sometimes just wake up at around that time.) So this worked for a while, but then I started going a littler earlier and a little earlier and then when I was around 13 I started to go to sleep in the same bed. I'm very scared of the dark and even when I sleep in the same bed as my mom I have to have a little light on. I'm ok at sleepovers and I'm fine if at least someone sleep in the same room as me, but very rarely will I ever go to sleep on my own. I'm 15 and I still can't shake the fear that something is going to happen, and even when I sleep with my mom, I force myself to face a specific way to make sure nothing will come at me. I just feel that something is going too get me, I really do hope I grow out of it soon; when I try to sleep alone I start sweating almost instantly, and then run back to my moms bed as if something were chasing me. I also frequently get sleep paralysis which is when your mind is awake and you can see your surrounding but you cant move your body and it usually lasts like 15 seconds, but it is still terrifying. I truly hope I grow out of this soon.

Jan 17, 2017
Little help for you NEW
by: Anonymous

I know exactly what you are experiencing. I couldn't sleep alone even when I was 28 :) . The first thing we are all scared of is 'the room'. It's big and it has lots of stuff. But, We can't shrink down the room, that's for sure. I suggest you following things:

1) Get into the room. That's the first big step
2) Keep a tv soap / song / movie or anything you like, that has some sound, besides you. Start that with a low volume. I usually do it with the headphone on. But, little sound works for me, even without headphone. And, I get to sleep.

I use 'F.R.I.E.N.D.S' tv soap for my sleep. it's just go on and then battery run out and it gets stopped. and I wake up in the morning afresh :)

Try it. Don't force to sleep, just enjoy the process.

Feb 06, 2017
My daughter will be 12 in a couple of days NEW
by: Anonymous

My 12 yr old cant sleep alone either. She is the only child. I had to put in 2 beds on her room, so I can sleep on one. She is so scared to sleep alone.

When she does try, within minutes she runs into my bedroom, crying hysterically, for me to come back. She falls asleep, I try to leave the room, but within 1-2hrs,she wakes up starts calling for me. I am too exhausted not to sleep the entire night with her.

It breaks my heart to have her be so scared. She should feel protected by me, and if I let her feel scared, I feel I am letting her down.

Feb 13, 2017
Night Terrors NEW
by: Ethan Fanslow

I can also relate with your daughter, I am not able to sleep comfortably in my room because my dreams had frightened me to where i can't sleep on my own. I am 13 yrs of age and natural sleeping pills had taken me over.

Feb 17, 2017
Same, but I am 13 years old NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi, I am 13 years old and I can not sleep alone. I used to be able to but now, after reading horror stuff, I can not sleep alone! I have to sleep on a pull out bed in my two brother's rooms. Now they say get out. I will not be able to sleep so any advice? Also, I cry like a little baby if I can not sleep with someone else in the room. What will happen to me in the future?

Feb 23, 2017
Thx NEW
by: Sweeney

My 13yr old daughter had this issue pop up when she was 12 years old. It came after we decided to move. As a father it was hard for me to understand. She has 3 other sisters and around 9 years old she wanted her own bedroom and she got it. She loved having her own room and never had a problem sleeping. When we decided to move into a new home in a new area with a new school district it triggered something. She is highly intelligent and independent, so this came as surprise. Next she came to us and said she wanted to talk to someone because she did not understand why this was happening. She has currently been in therapy for 5 months and enjoys it. It has helped her just in general to be able to talk to someone. Her fear is being the last one awake. It causes severe anxiety and has been hard on the wife and I also. I was so happy to stumble across this page. It has helped me understand this is ok and not as serious as I thought it might be. She can sleep at friends and have friends sleep over it's just the thought of being alone. As a father who loves his girls more then anything I'm happy to see I'm not alone. I would sleep with her forever if I had to and it's nice to see stories of people who had the same issue and have moved on. I just want to say thank you for sharing your stories. It helped me and I'm going to share this page with her tomorrow!

Mar 02, 2017
I'm also 13, same issue NEW
by: Anonymous

I am a 13 year old girl with the same issue. I've been sleeping next to my dad since I was a tiny little thing, and now I can't seem to sleep soundly without someone in the room, or at the very least somewhere that they can see into the room. I have an almost crippling fear of the dark, and I'll cry and maybe even scream if left in a dark room alone. Not sure if this will be of any help, but I have clinical depression, a history of self harm, suicidal thoughts, a traumatic past with female role models in my life, my mother especially (we aren't allowed to communicate or be with each other by court order) and I sometimes turn to the alchohol in my best friends' parents cabinet to ease my mind. Just wanted to make sure I give all the information I can, for a more accurate explanation.

Mar 03, 2017
11 yr old girl NEW
by: Anonymous

omg I thought I was crazy. I'm 11 and I could not sleep bye my self. I can now but occasionally I freak out. I sleep in the same room as my sister and I'm afraid that when she moves to another room that I wont be able to sleep. ok soooooooooo I'm realllly surprised that nobody mentioned being afraid of ghosts and noises.This is the main thing that I'm afraind of. One thing I do to help its turn my favorite movie on (harry potter) then turn the volume down low. I also have my dog Zoey sleep in my room which also helps A LOT. hope this helped you a little!!!:)

Mar 06, 2017
my story NEW
by: Anonymous

I have the same issue... I am 13 now and still don't like to sleep on my own.... around lunch time the prole starts... I worry and worry and worry about it until I make myself physically sick. I lay in bed and cry for no reason... This is why I feel so guilty... I have a great life with my lovely parents. My problem started when my dad strated to work away and I started getting into my mum's bed. I haven't been able to shift the problem since. It is so difficult to describe what it feels like to people who don't have the same issues. My mum and dad are getting me through this and I know I will do it one day!thank you for making me feel like I am not on my own!!:)

Mar 06, 2017
I just don't know how NEW
by: Lindsay

Hi I am 13 and I made a deal with my father that if I sleep in my own room he will get me a puppy so I have to start tomorrow night and I don't know how. I have tried everything and I just don't know what to do. I promised him I would but I have tried and tried before. I started sleeping with my father when I was 7 after my parents divorce and I haven't been a blessing to sleep alone sence. I can sleep at party's d friends house as long as I sLee with some one it is just so hard. I am afraid of the dark, have anxiety, and afraid of any single sound I hear. I just don't know what to do anymore. Please please help!

Mar 08, 2017
12year old boy can't sleep alone, NEW
by: Jackie

My 12 year old can't sleep alone, he has massive anxiety at even the thought of sleeping alone,iv talked to a professional who said that it must stop at once as it's unhealthy, I know it's not good for him and he should be able to self sooth but even the thought of lone sleeping make him melt down and he says he'd rather die than sleep alone, myself and his father are really patient and I'd rather wait and hope he will grow out of it than break his spirit completely than force him to lone sleep. I know he's not attention seeking with his fear,he genuinely is petrified to sleep alone. It makes me feel better to know he's not alone and there are tons of girls and boys that suffer this fear, il show him these comments so he can see,people do get over this and he's not a freak like he thinks.

Mar 08, 2017
I need help NEW
by: 😵

So im 13 years old amd i have the same exact problem i started trying to sleep alone when i was 9 it was very hard and i whouldnt sleep until sunrise and even though my mom whould sleep next to me i whould sleep 1 hour and wake up terrified i really need help im turning 14 i really whould like to sleep alone but i do have an anxiety so i need someone to help me i have tried everything lights and the i pad but it was just sleeping an hour and waking up again so we ended up putting a mattress too unti now sooo please give me tips thanks

Mar 11, 2017
16 year old son sleeps in our room NEW
by: Anonymous

First off, these are entirely normal situations, as evident from so many posters already. The human mind is amazing and will always find a way to balance itself. You will notice in the posts so many of these teenagers are considered popular at school, or possibly have had a loss of a parent through death or divorce, or are recently being forced to sleep in therir own bed. These are all moments of great change, growth and blossoming independence. The more the teenager or child is perceiving a surge in their independence, the more they will seek balance at night for security and comfort by wanting the support of a loved one nearby. My son has more than two of these. He has recently become super popular at school, is physically growing into a man (with the heavy weight of society's unrealistic definition of what that should be), and recently witnessed firsthand a medical emergency of his father(me). A lot of growth all at once!! Of course it is natural to search for security and support to balance that out. Which is why he recently started to sleep in our room and fears being alone.
So, how does this ever change? Seeing a psychologist would seem to just reinforce the anxiety by continuing to run the story, and continue to view this as a weakness or something is wrong, as opposed to viewing this as the minds beautifully orchestrated method of balancing out this new growth and/or surge in independence. Is there a method to help the kids go through this temporary phase faster? Absolutely. The best method is to simply sit down and physically write down a list of at least 20 benefits of sleeping alone in there own room, and then immediately they should write 20 drawbacks of sleeping in parents room. Initially they will say there are none of each, but be persistent! Once they start to find a few, the rest will flow freely. At the end of the process, they will have a more realistic and balanced view of what sleeping in their room vs parents means. Dr. John demartini has some great YouTube videos on anxiety if you want to dig deeper.
Good luck to all, and feel free to embrace, appreciate and love your amazing mind's ability to adapt in its own miraculous and "normal" way.

Mar 13, 2017
Let it go NEW
by: Anonymous

They will not be sleeping with you when they are 15 or 16 trust me. My son slept with my husband until 13 and slept with us the day before my husband died how I cherish that memory

Mar 14, 2017
13 years old NEW
by: Anonymous

I am 13 now and my room is right next to mums and dads i still can not sleep bue myself i just lay there and try to sleep but think about scary things like ghosts and stuff dad has tried melotonin and phinergan but i still have to sleep with mum i want to make him proud but it is just so hard please help me i am not normal 😓😓😓😓

Mar 14, 2017
The one above NEW
by: Anonymous

You are normal! It is common! Don't be so hard on your self everything will be fine!!

Mar 17, 2017
Same NEW
by: Anonymous

I am 12 and can't sleep alone, and whenever my mommy isn't with me I cry and worry, I have no friends and have 1 older brother but my mom is the only thing that lets me sleep at night and it happened overnight like one night I was fine but a few months ago after a week of being badly sick I couldn't be alone without my mom or dad for more then 10 minutes without crying and breaking down

Mar 19, 2017
Me too NEW
by: Anonymous

Currently I am a tween with the same problem. I try and say to myself "tomorrow I will sleep in my room" but I never end up doing so. I start out upstairs but as soon as I wake up I run down stairs and into my moms bed. I don't know why but I simply cannot stay asleep. I currently take melatonin, use a diffuser with lavender oil, and use the roll on essential oils. I also drink chamomile tea. I no longer have any trouble FALLING asleep but staying asleep is the real challenge. I just want to go back downstairs at times and I'm too tired to think reasonably. I am hoping I will grow out if this. I have been doing research and that is how I came upon this website. I really don't want to be that 15 year old that is still afraid of monsters. What should I do?

Mar 21, 2017
I thought I was a Freak NEW
by: Anonymous

I am 13 turning 14 and i promised myself this year before i turn fourteen i will be able to over come this problem for a long time i thought i was a freak, i hated myself and during daytime i was fine but i can't i really can't. Knowing that there are other people suffering from this gives me confidence that i'm not alone, I always put it off as "I'll do it tomorrow" and so the cycle continues. I thank you all for without this website may I never have gotten the confidence to try overcome this issue. To any censured parents please show your child this website let them read as much as the want. Me knowing I'm not alone may have changed my life, Thank you

Mar 29, 2017
Is it my exams NEW
by: Anonymous

I'm in secondary school.I started sleeping by myself before Christmas my room was renovated I loved it I lasted two months and I really loved sleeping by myself I have really big exams coming up and the fear of sleeping alone came back like it used to when I was a kid.I slept with my mum until the next term in school because I thought it'd be better if I knew I didn't have school the next day this was not the case I still get the feeling except it's worse now as I can't go on sleepovers anymore even to my best friend of 10 years .i don't want to tell my friends about it because I don't want to seem like a baby but it kills me that I can't go on sleepovers because I want to it's just the feeling of dread is so bad can anybody tell me if this is just my exams or if I'm just getting worse because I don't want to lose my friends .

Apr 05, 2017
my 11 year old daughter says she feels safer sleeping with me NEW
by: Anonymous

my 11 year old has been thru a lot.. I think it comes from her dad not spending any time with her or contacting her ... i'm wondering if this is why she don't want to sleep alone... because she just lives with me she don't live with her dad. she stays with her aunt and uncle a lot due to me working. she was saying she sleeps in bed at night at her aunt and her aunt has a night light.. going to try that? I m just trying to figure this out? a friend of mine told me it's not healthy that she sleeps with me.. been worried

Apr 08, 2017
OMG same NEW
by: Anonymous

My Mother used to complain about how I am a baby for not sleeping alone. She used to threrhend me to sleep alone or to tell the whole school about how I don't sleep alone. I am so Glad that I found a lot of people Like me. ❤❤❤❤
..

Apr 26, 2017
Please HELPP MEEEE!!!! NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi I'm 11 and was used to sleeping with my mom for. A long amount of time, as my mum and dad broke up. I have grown out of it but my 13 sister hasn't. Me and my sister share a room and have very comfortable beds so that's not the issue. Every night she sleeps in my moms bed like it's her room. My mom keeps having a go at her and telling her every single night that the next day she won't be sleeping in her bed. But she still does!!!!! She had a sleepover with her friend once and slept in my bed perfectly fine with no one in it with her, so I don't see what the issue is. I feel really lonely at night when my mom and her are all cosy together and I'm all alone in my room!!!! My sister says it's because I watched the Quija board in our room and I've haunted the room, then she says that its because her bed is uncomfortable but ITS NOTTT. What can I do this has been going on for many many many years now😩😩

May 09, 2017
I Need Help :( NEW
by: [insert name]

I'm experiencing the same problem you all have.

I live in my grandparents house with my grandparents, and my two uncles.
We have a two storey house, my room, and my two uncle's room are upstairs while my grandparent's sleep in their room downstairs.
My older uncle comes home on Thursdays but my younger uncle sleeps here everyday. Unfortunately, he comes home late on weekends because he has a band, so I will be alone upstairs.
I am very paranoid of sleeping alone, even with the hallway lights open, door open, lights open, because I feel like someone will be in the hallways watching me.
I recently turned 11 this April, and my grandma wants me to sleep in my room now.
Everytime she mentions that, I feel dizzy or paranoid, I suddenly become silent.
My room is really large, we have a broken TV, 2 dirty chairs in there. It's practically an attic. There is also a trapdoor above my roof, and a picture of my aunt in her young. Maybe I don't like sleeping there because it's dirty, and I like clean spaces. I tried convincing my grandma to clean and rearrange my room but she says it's too much work. I don't want the TV and the dirty chairs in my room but there is nowhere to put them except the hallway but it will be cramped.

When I stay over at my parent's house with my brother, we all stay on one bed but I can't sleep comfortably.

There is a digital clock in our room and it's light is red. I don't have great memories with red because it's the color of blood and I am absolutely terrified of blood.
Sometimes, both me and my younger brother have trouble sleeping but he eventually falls asleep which panics me.
I look at the clock and it says 10:25, I freak out even more. I probably falls asleep for an hour and a half and wake up again, this time it's 1:10 which makes me freak out even more because I don't realize I fell alseep and it feels like I've been awake for that long.
It takes me until 3 to fall asleep and the next morning, I wake up around 11 and miss breakfast.

Back at my grandma's house, I can't sleep without her beside me.

She likes watching shows at night until 11 so I stay up til then. When she enters the room in between her shows, she sees me awake she gets frustrated. I am also very clingy and attached to her because she's been my guardian since I was a baby.
I like to stick to her and hug her which also frustrates her because she plays Scrabble on her phone before she sleeps and she doesn't get a free hand.
I wait until she ends the game and I force her to hug me, then I fall asleep faster than lighting, however I cannot when she's not the one beside me.

School starts this June and by then I want to start sleeping in my room.
I'm getting my phone back next week so is there anything I can listen to that can help?

Thanks for the help. :)

May 12, 2017
End it Now NEW
by: Anonymous

I have to say, I have been the Mother that you all are. My daughter needed to sleep with her parents. Eventually, she started sleeping alone some as she became a teen. When her Dad and I divorced, she wanted to sleep with me again, and I did allow it some. Now she is an adult with anxiety and depression. She is 20 years old, and she went from being a normal happy outgoing and very intelligent young lady to being scared and depressed. Her counselor and psychiatrist both told her that it is a result of me being overly involved in her life and not allowing her a sense of self. That allowing her to sleep with us for so long was a terrible mistake. As an only child, she and I do have a very close relationship, but I never knew I was doing any harm. All I did was take care of her and be involved in her life. I did not have that growing up, but I have to say, I am much more independent. So, you might want to consider letting them fight this dragon sooner than later.

May 22, 2017
Exhausted NEW
by: Anonymous

As I sit here in the floor of my 12 yr old twins room I'm exhausted and just want to cry. They will not fall asleep on their own. I haven't slept with my husband in so many years I think he thinks we are roommates. I'm so happy to see I'm not the only mom with Kids who struggle with this. It's ruined our marriage but I like be my kids and would do anything for them. Including missing out on a loving relationship with my husband. Good luck to all the mommies and kids who are going thru this.

May 23, 2017
Affect on Marriage and Family NEW
by: Exhausted Dad

My 12 year old son has sleep anxiety. It started when he was nine, after a sleepover where they watched scary videos. For a long time he could not sleep alone. Nowadays he can sleep alone if he absolutely has to, but needs to have the light on, the door open and several fans going. He also cannot fall asleep unless I am still awake, so I am forced to stay up late every night. I am exhausted all the time.

As a side effect my wife and I have no quiet time together, whether that's reading a book, watching a TV show, or just discussing the day's events. We rarely share a bed anymore. Our son is either awake with us, or one of us is dealing with his sleep issues. It's put a huge strain on our marriage. It also impacts his siblings, who are forced to fight for whatever scraps of attention we have left. It's tearing our family apart.

We have tried many things to help him, including therapy, with middling results. The truth is he doesn't seem that motivated to change. He becomes argumentative when we bring it up, and the drama starts. I understand this is due to anxiety, but that doesn't make it any easier to deal with.

There are lots of comments here from the child's perspective. I would be interested in hearing how the parents have coped, and whether there is any advice for me and my family.

Regards

May 30, 2017
Ridiculous NEW
by: Anonymous

Sleep habits begin as babies home from the hospital. I had one son as a baby toddler made me stay in the rocking chair until he slept. But we are talking less than a year. By 1 year he would know his bedtime routine and lie down. I think it is ridiculous to have a teenager not able to fall asleep by themselves and sleep in the bed with mommy. It doesn't help self identification and separation to know themselves. Are they going to do it at 19?

Jun 06, 2017
Our daughter is 10 NEW
by: Anonymous

Our daughter is 10 and she is an only child. She is a wonderful girl and gets great grades and is a very honest and caring kid. She doesn't use bad language and is very sincere. She says she is scared and my wife went to her bed and it works but she always wants to be between us. The sad truth is that we love feeling her hand pat our faces while she sleeps and how she loves to cuddle. The bed is getting smaller even though it's a king and one of our dogs comes up as our two cats.

As many articles and studies that there may be- we hope that this will start with to change for her. But, honesty- it breaks my heart to think she won't be There anymore. Life
Is way to short. Your 13yo will stop soon as will our daughter. Life goes on and we will have to learn to accept it! We will be the ones missing the cuddle times....

Jun 06, 2017
Kids, you are all too hard on your selves!! NEW
by: Anonymous

My heart breaks for all of you kids!! She op beating yourselves up!! You all sound like there is something wrong with you- but you are wrong! You have to understand that you are at a time that you feel alone and not normal but that is wrong. You want reassurance and security and you are starving for contact with those you love.

It's okay. Your parents are scared and want you to be strong and be able to make it on your own. They are tired and need space to sleep but it's not that they don't want you close.... it's just that I may scare them that you can not break free to face the world on your own.

You can and you will but don't panic or beat your self up about it. The girl who is promised a puppy- 😊... what a great goal and it is so heart breaking what you are struggling with. Just keep trying and take small steps.

You are all going to be okay. Have pride and trust yourselves and in your parents. This is a small step in life and don't make it a huge wall you can't get over. For you who feel alone and may not have parents- life will bring you your family.... a husband, a wife.....kids.....maybe a dog or cat..... but your family is out there waiting for you to find them. So not being able to sleep alone right now....?..... small apples and only a hiccup in your life.

I am the father of the 10 year old several posts higher. You are in your parents hearts and your are your parents treasure.

As for you parents that are preaching and posting strong opinions in almost an attack mode of
Parents and kids struggling..... I will gladly meet with you to discuss how you and your life is so perfect.

I slept in my own bed growing up, and maybe speaking for the woman who said that her 13 yo son slept in his dads bed just before her husband passed away- life is short but we have memories.

I was 13 when I woke from sleep to hear my mom screaming as my 44 yo father died from a heart attack. My brother and I tried to revive him but he died. I was 17 when I watched as the doctors tried to revive my mother. She was 46. My wife was young when mother died from cancer.

We know our daughter should be sleeping alone and we are working on it. But I will be damned if I read comments belittling parents and kids that are struggling.

Parents and kids that are concerned: that is what makes you who you are- can omg people that need support and not ton a of sarcasim In comments from self righteous people.

This isn't a have pity on us story. It's been 30 years for me. I am now 53 and we have our treasure- a 10 yo old girl who almost died from a severe fever when she was 2.

Jun 07, 2017
What should I Do? NEW
by: Sophia

My parents think it's silly that I can't sleep I'm 10 and I always get scared when I sleep alone. I sleep with my sis sometimes I'm fine then but I get charged 30$ a night! And somethimes she doesn't let me and I get freaked out and stay up scared the whole night. I need some help and advice and hurry I think I can't stand another night.

Jun 08, 2017
10 year old just above this! NEW
by: Anonymous

Being in a dark room alone is scary for some people! Have you tried a night light or two ? Southing sounds like waves or frog? Gray noise like a fan running? leaving the tv on with no volume or
Maybe the radio? Taking melatonin (our daughter takes the chewable strawberry).

Bedtime can leave your mind racing and this can cause your anxiety which can lead you into to fearing to be alone! Your bed and bedroom needs to be your happy and safe place for you! Create a gentle and cozy atmosphere and have your stuffed animals and favorite pjs! Have a room air freshener that is mild but gives you a happy memory (aromatherapy).

10 is an age that you are in between so much in your life! Think of bedtime as your safe time to curl up and let your guard down- it's you and your stuffies in your safe room in your safe home! Happy thoughts only and no time to reflect on things that bother you.

When I was young, I dreamed of being the quarterback of my favorite team. Every night I went to bed I created a story of it and then I fell asleep imagining my life. I did this through High school also at times. It's pretending in your mind of your dream life. I was shy and even imagined when I got older the prettiest girl in my school liked me.

It may sound silly, but for me it was an escape and got my thoughts to be happy and slowly I would drift away to sleep. Being alone in my room let me feel it was just me floating.

I am grown now and I played college football- a quarterback and I have a happy life, a great family and a very pretty wife!

Day Dream away at bedtime and be happy and know it's okay. You will be fine!

Jun 08, 2017
Thank you but... NEW
by: Sophia

I tried all those things and my parents don't let me have stuffed animals or stuff like that. I have 2 stuffed animals I love when I was little because I thought I wasn't a lone but now there just scary. I tried sleeping with my dogs but he runs away. I don't know what I gonna do with myself.😰

Jun 19, 2017
If you need help read this NEW
by: Rachel

Hi I am rachel I am 13 I have been sleeping with my mom for over 4 years now and still doing it trust me it's a phase I have recently Been seeing a therapist and parents it's helpful very helpful. Also what really helps me fall asleep is leavin the tv on or reading a book also you and parents can make your room more you make it where it is comfortable to relax in paint it hang up nice pictures anything you want so please try to do some of these things thanks😘

Jun 23, 2017
Sophia.... NEW
by: Anonymous

I am sorry you don't have stuffed animals.... try a pair or two of rolled up socks and pretend it's an egg that you are trying to hatch and protecting.... pretend the duckling is inside and knows you ane loves you. Now you have a our own stuffy and don't worry if the next day you have to take a different pair. It's all in your imagination and it can fill your heart with comfort that you are not alone in this. Now- time to create your own story in your head and make it a movie about what you dream of...... getting your yourself tired before bed with exersize and drinking milk and melantonin will help.

Leaving some sound on just barely in the background like the girl above said is good too! Not loud and not distracting!

Happy thoughts and your warm cozy bed with your eggs you are protecting. You are not alone- far from it. I don't even know you but I am on your side like many others....

This will all pass.... there is a huge exciting world out there and you, for now- are just a bit overwhelmed. It's all good-

You are safe and you already have shown through your words that you have the biggest heart and you are very emotional- something that makes you
Beyond unique- and very special to your family and fiture family.

You got this! :)

Jun 28, 2017
If you need help with sleep read this NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi I am Megan I am Almost 14 and I have slept with my mom for over 5 years, the girl above rachel gave great ideas 💡 I am seeing a therapist now and it works I can talk to someone and they will understand. I also leave the tv on and I a lots of stuft animals I also I made my room more comfortable I painted it and put up nice pictures and made it nice please do these things they work . Good luck to all

Jul 13, 2017
im 12 and i can't sleep alone NEW
by: Anonymous

im 12 and I'm about to go the 7th grade and i can't sleep alone. i will usually sleep on my parents floor and this has been going on for 3 yrs. I don't know what to do i have an office where i play games so i am going to try sleeping there in the future but i don't know what to do i always breath heavy and finally just give up and go to my parents room. I've always had this disorder since i was 5 someone scared me so much i would always go to my moms room when i was 10 my mom just gave up and let me sleep in her room. I am glad I'm not the only one who suffers this.

Jul 25, 2017
Sometimes,I very scary while sleep alone NEW
by: Khang Pham

I'm almost 11 years old,but there is a lot of time that I can't even sleep without my parents around for some days.Because O always think on my mind,my mind that I remember one of the scariest picture I ever seen on Internet.So I always want to sleep with my parents a lot of time because I can be scared when I sleep alone at night.And it cannot be safety to leave your kids sleep alone without your parents.Can somebody help me with this thing??
Thank you for reading my comment.

Jul 29, 2017
Me NEW
by: Anonymous

Sense I was born in was never able to sleep alon I would get scared and it made it worse cause my mom traveled

Aug 01, 2017
Help me please!!!!!!!!!!😭😭 NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi I am 11,almost 12.I am always in my room during the day and I can be there at night but as soon and I get tired and want to go to bed I can't I have to sleep in my moms room and same thing at my dads. I just think of the creepiest things that could happen to me and have to go into my moms room so now I started to not even try to sleep by myself and just go right into her room my friend had the same problem but just got over it a few months ago. My mom even said she would get me anything I want if I slept by myself for 2 weeks (which most of you would say that's easy and think I am weird that I didn't do it ) but I couldn't do it I slept by myself for 1 week and 4 days I tried but I saw something scary on the news that day so I couldn't do it I am very disappointed....I have a loft bed and today we decided to get me a bed frame and I and so so scared to sleep still during the day I always say it's not scary nothing will happen and I will sleep by myself but when it comes around to nighttime I can't do it........can someone please help me?? Please I don't want to be like this forever which I hope I am not but I am scared I will be.....please help??!!

Aug 03, 2017
I'm 13 NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi My daughter is 13 in high school and She can't sleep in he own room she can sleep with her friends and her sister sleeps with her on a mattress she used to but then something happens pls help her!

Aug 04, 2017
Deep breath! NEW
by: Anonymous

Girls! 11 and 13- post above,

Please take a deep breath! The more pressure you place on your selves the worse you make it for yourselves! You are going t get over this! It takes time and please stop feeling you aren't normal! I will write more
Later but please take a deep breath and take the pressure off and smile.... you are loved.

Aug 13, 2017
? NEW
by: Zach

I'm 13 and I get really scared sleeping in my room because I watched a scary movie with my dad a couple years ago that had a creepy doll that I always think of when I see the dark. I always end up going to my parents room in the middle of the night and I can't find a way to make it through the night. Suggestions?

Aug 20, 2017
Please help NEW
by: Anonymous

I am a 12 year old girl who is terrified of sleeping in my own bed. I am not scared of my room or anything in it, I just love my mom so deeply that I think it's unhealthy. I sleep in her bed just with her. Whenever she tries to discuss me sleeping in my own room I think I have an anxiety attack, my stomach drops, I burst into tears, and can't stop crying for 10 mins. please help I feel like a baby who can't part from her mother. I am completely fine at sleepovers but when I think about sleeping alone I can't stop crying.

Aug 21, 2017
. NEW
by: Anonymous

Same

Aug 22, 2017
I am that teenager... NEW
by: Anonymous

I'm 16 years old and have suffered with this issue for almost three years now. It's so frustrating because I want too be independent and sleep on my own however every time I lie down I just panic and can't do it. I'm starting to fear something is wrong with me. Every time me and my mum are about to go to bed , when she turns the lights off I rush too bed first because I hate to think I'm the last person awake in the house. Even when I try too sleep in my own bed with the lights on I just don't even begin to want to fall asleep so as soon as I turn the light off it just has to go straight back on because I get so worked up. Instead I just sleep in my mums bed with her. Any advice would be great :)!

Sep 01, 2017
I'm 11 and I don't know what's wrong with me NEW
by: Anonymous

I am 11 I'm writing this because I have tried everything and I just think that I am stupid or an idiot I just don't know
What's wrong with me my mum sonetimes let's
Me sleep with her but then make me promise not to come in the next night I just sit up on be and cry for hours because I don't want to go desturb her or break my promise but I fell like I really have to so I go to my mum and she will probably send me back to my room or just let me but fell like I let her down and myself down I just am so sad plz help me fix this problem 😢😩😭

Sep 05, 2017
Thanks for letting me know NEW
by: Anonymous

Thank you for creating this site. I feel better knowing there are a lot of people like me. I have a hard time sleeping at night. I feel like every second someone is going to walk into my house. I have trouble sleeping alone in my room. And at other people's houses.

Sep 25, 2017
12 almost 13 year old son won't sleep in his own room NEW
by: Karrie

Hi, My son is 12 almost 13 and he refuses to sleep in his own room. I do feel like this is mostly my fault because when his father and I divorced, I had to cut back and got a two bedroom place, and instead of sleeping in the room with his brother, he slept in my room with me. This has been going on for years. When he was 9 he told me that as soon as he turned double digits he would sleep in his own room, hasn't happened and he will be 13 in Nov. I just purchased a really neat bunk bed set with a full and twin so his brother can have the full. He slept in it once since we got it. I have a boyfriend that lives with me and he is getting very upset with having to sleep on the couch cause he says the bed isn't big enough for the 3 of us. I am lost and don't know what to do to change this. He is a very angry young man and it is a big fight everytime I mention him sleeping in his room.

Sep 25, 2017
10 yr old son cant sleep by alone NEW
by: Anonymous

It is definitely good to know I'm not alone. I try to be patient with him because I was the same way. I guess what come around goes around. I get upset some times that he won't help himself when I am trying everything to help him. Lay by him,sit in chair and even got a dog. Thinking that's what helped me. Not sure where to go from here.

Oct 03, 2017
me too.. NEW
by: Anonymous

i am 13 and very afraid to sleep alone. but my sis of age 8 sleeps alone without any fear. recently i saw conjuring 2. my room is bare. so i ordered glow stickers . i hope i can sleep with tjose. any way pls help me. my parents are calling me a cry baby if i say that im afraid ti sleep alone.

Dec 09, 2017
Someone please give me some advise NEW
by: Anonymous

I'm 12 as well but I can't sleep in my own room my mom has to be with me or awake when I fall asleep usually we are in the guest room because my dad has bad snoring but I like it witha tv on and I'm VERY anxious and scared about sleeping with no one with me my mom won't get me a rv in my room which I feel is worsening the problem someone help me plz I usually fall sleep around 11 but if I get lucky 10:30. I absolutely hate it and I don't want my mom to get worried about me but sometimes I feel like being in my own bed I'm so scared to go to bed in my own room . My room is in the front of the house and I wondered if that was the problem but I do feel it's getting worse and worse!! Someone please help me I don't know how to fix this issue and I'm worried about my own being....

Dec 09, 2017
Someone please give me some advise NEW
by: Anonymous

I'm 12 as well but I can't sleep in my own room my mom has to be with me or awake when I fall asleep usually we are in the guest room because my dad has bad snoring but I like it witha tv on and I'm VERY anxious and scared about sleeping with no one with me my mom won't get me a rv in my room which I feel is worsening the problem someone help me plz I usually fall sleep around 11 but if I get lucky 10:30. I absolutely hate it and I don't want my mom to get worried about me but sometimes I feel like being in my own bed I'm so scared to go to bed in my own room . My room is in the front of the house and I wondered if that was the problem but I do feel it's getting worse and worse!! Someone please help me I don't know how to fix this issue and I'm worried about my own being....

Dec 15, 2017
11 yeas old NEW
by: Anonymous

I have had this problem since I was 5 I have googled it and have cried most times because I felt alone my parents sleep fine.

Dec 19, 2017
I am 15 with this problem NEW
by: Anonymous

please help me. i have this problem and really need to start sleeping in my own room, but I can't :(

Any advise?

Dec 21, 2017
Still not sleeping by myself ;-; NEW
by: Anonymous

I’m 11 and I WILL NOT sleep without my parents nearby. I have a crazy fear of being the only one awake in the house. I hope I grow out of it soon, because I’m losing a lot of sleep.

Jan 04, 2018
8 year old daughter with sleep anxiety NEW
by: Anonymous

My daughter is going though this. She won't sleep in her own bed and I see that it is quite common.
I hope she does grow out of it within the next few years. She is great in sleepovers as husband and I get a great sleep for a change instead of being kicked in the back.
I can pinpoint it to one event and I am now going to talk to her about it.
Hopefully after a lot of reassurance I may be ok!

Jan 07, 2018
I'm having this problem now.. NEW
by: Anonymous

I get sooo scared if I'm not with my mom I hear noises but I know it's my cats but it doesn't stop my imagination from going wild I am 12 almost 13 and I still sleep with my mom. I don't know how to stop what's going on. I thought it was because I moved but that's clearly not it at all. This is bigger than I thought I want to tell my mom but I can't. I'm an odd child, I'm different I don't like trends and I just weird.. I have been bullied before but I don't know when it comes to sleep I never have caffeine. I'm scared to death if I'm alone in bed. Sometimes I get nervous,scared, and anxious with my mom next to me.. I feel someone or something's going to come through the door and do something bad, or I'm being watched. Just something bad. Please help me. I don't know what to do.... I've even cried about it. I'm an emotional kid. I don't know how to deal with it and I'm scared for the future, what if it doesn't end. Can someone give me advice! I'm absolutely clueless what to do.. I'm even getting uncomfortable when I sleep but if I sleep on my own I won't sleep I will be up all night looking at my window, the door, or the closet. I won't even be on my phone.. Please help me! I need help on this!!😰😭

Jan 08, 2018
To the child who feels different NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi There, I am the comment above yours, I think you don't need to be ashamed for being different and a lot of your peers want you to be a sheep (#follower) you be different and be proud. Try and speak to your parents as they will put you on the right path to help you cope. Your fear of the bullies will cause you sleep problem unless you get support such as some counselling to give coping stragies. I've been bullied at school quite badly and now I'm a parent to 2 children and have come the other side, it gets better I wished I told my parents and I know why I didn't. I did not want to disappoint them but as a parent now. I would want my children to tell me and I will deal with it for my child and I have. It also stopped and it helped. I am pleading with you to speak with your parents. Believe me when I say a problem shared is a problem halved.

Jan 08, 2018
Understand NEW
by: Anonymous

As a parent with a 13 year old suffering this I feel your pain, both as a parent and the child. As a separated family I think it makes it even harder. One child can’t sleep alone due to anxiety, fear & the other doesn’t want too as they may be missing out! I love my kids & want them to feel safe & secure. I’m hoping they will grow out if it so I have given up pressurising for the time being. I know it’s a demon of their own to deal with, and I hope it evolves soon.

Jan 16, 2018
I’m scared to sleep and to be alone without my parents. NEW
by: Anonymous

I have had this issue all my life, I am now 13 and I am terrified to sleep alone. I have a lot of trouble falling asleep and panick every time I nealry fall alseep(when I’m by myself). However, when I’m with someone (my mam) I feel a lot more safe and secure and I can fully relax and fall asleep straight away without no problem at all. When I was just 2 or 3 I had trouble sleeping alone I was restless and my parents brought me into there bed, and I got too attatched and now still get scared to sleep alone. When I was 7 my parents tried to get me to sleep in my own room but unfortunately I was terrified and couldn’t sleep. I have slept in my bed for quite long periods of time once for over a year when I was 9/10 and then I got attatched again. I Then slept by myself when I was 12 to the start of when I was 13 and I was perfectly fine for about 7 months I loved sleeping in my room. However when summer came around I started sleeping with my mam and my dad went upstairs. However he was snoring and had issues with it so it wasn’t because of me. I started to get attatched again and I felt like I shouldn’t worry about sleeping in my own bed anymore because I thought , at the time, I would stay sleeping in my mams bed. But, recently my parents have been getting me to sleep in my own room and I’m panicking and I feel like I’m worrying it scares me and I’m not sure why. Please help. It’s not because of people intruding the house or anything like that, I think it’s the actual being alone part, without my parents. I hope I relate to others, if can please help

Jan 19, 2018
Same problem NEW
by: Anonymous

I have the same problem... I am 12yrs and have anxiety, depression and separation anxiety. I am really attached to my mom where I get all upset before bed because I want to stay up and be with her but she wants to go to bed, so I go with her. I feel so embarrassed and my dad is upset that I can't sleep in my own brand new room he spent a lot of money for. Its so hsrd tho! So im glad I found this and relate to all of these comments. Please anyone give me advice. 😕

Jan 20, 2018
Sleeping with parents at 14 NEW
by: Anonymous

I can relate I'm 14 and I can't sleep without one of my parents or someone in the room with me. I've been trying to sleep by myself ever since I was 7 but no luck I tried to use some of the techniques on how to get your child to sleep alone but they don't work

Jan 23, 2018
Possible Night Terrors or Peralysis NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi, I would first like to start this by saying my issue has now resolved and is over, idk when this ended for me but it did. I don't remember a lot from my childhood but I do remember afew things, things such as what I'd call now as anxiety for the dark / sleeping alone. Idk exactly when this alll started I'm just going to guess around 7 and I'd say ended around 11. As all of you explained when you tried to go to bed you'd be afraid as soon as your parents fell asleep. I remember having to have my mom sit on my bed with my till I fell asleep. For years they tried making me sleep in my bed but as soon as there light went out I felt this over whelming fear and feeling that I was being watched or something was in my room I'd try to hid under my blankets but I'd get so nervous I would start to over heat and sweat uncontrollably to the point where my only choice was to run with my blanket and pillow to my parents bedroom. Like the title says I feel like this just might be afew sleep paralysis (or atleast afew times and then with that fear I wouldn't wanna go back bed) idk after so many years of fighting my parents and literally crying about not wanting to be alone in my room I got over it. I'd say best way to go about this is be nice to your kid talk to them and keep like your hall light on during the night so they won't feel so afraid, I use to like having a lamp on durring when I sleep (it's kinda bad for sleeping but I guess atleast u get to sleep) anyway there u go, I hope I helped, btw I'm now 14 almost 15 in 2 months! Oh and also allow them to have friends over cause I remember not having a problem while friends were over.

Feb 05, 2018
i can't sleep alone! NEW
by: CoolGirl20

I am going through the same thing! I hate sleeping alone. Honestly I don't what is going on with me. ALl my cousins sleep alone. Even my five year- old sis says, "its okay, I'm here with you stop crying." I always tell my friends I sleep alone but I don't. I always ASK my friends if the sleep alone and they're like, "Duh," I'm so scared but you made me feel better. I read a few websites on how to sleep alone. My aunt told me its just a phase. I'M SO SCARED! I hope I grow out of it. I'm just so close to my parents.

Feb 05, 2018
i can't sleep alone! NEW
by: Anonymous

I can't sleep alone. I don't know why. I'm 9! I think honestly somethings wrong with you. I feel like a weirdo whose a scaredy cat. Literally in school, I'm fine but as soon as its 5:30 I strike stress. I tell my mom "I can't sleep by myself" and she says you can sleep with me. There's nothing she can do. Anyways, one night I was up till 3:00 in the morning and my dad was laying with me. He tried to leave several times but I stopped him. I have to get over this fear. I hope your daughter does.

Feb 11, 2018
12 year old terrified to sleep alone NEW
by: Tiredmum

I noticed this is a really old thread but I am desperate so if anyone can advise me please. My daughter Beth has become increasingly terrified to sleep alone, no triggers and she is otherwise bright happy and healthy. For 2 or 3 years she has slept with her older sister who is now not tolerating sharing her bed. Beth has now started asking to sleep with me and turfing my husband out to sleep in the spare room. When my husband is away overnight she gets very anxious. Last night she was at her grandparents and was hyperventilating and shaking with fear because they suggested she sleep in a different bed from her sister. My mother in law thinks I should get her to a mental health practitioner.
I feel reassured reading posts on here that we are not alone but I wonder if anyone got professional help from a psychiatrist and if it helped? I am worried about making Beth feel abnormal by medicalizing this.

Apr 09, 2018
13 year old girl with sleeping issues NEW
by: Andy

Hi all,
Glad to know we are not alone. We had a break in 2 years ago and since then we have had trouble. The person broke in through her window so it has added tension. During the day perfectly confident but cannot be alone at night, let alone be in her room alone.
Me and the wife and getting no private time and this is really difficult.
We of course are understanding but can we expect many more months of this?

Apr 24, 2018
Read this NEW
by: Rachel

Hi everyone my name is Rachel and I’m 14, I slept with my mom for over 4 years when I was 13 we were on vacation and I had to sleep on the couch . My brother had a noise machine it plays soothing sounds and I also took melatonin. I was seeing a therapist at the time and it was wonderful cause I got it all off my chest the therapist worked 10/10. I’ve been sleeping on my own for almost 2 years now . You need to make your room complete and comfortable the way that can have you relax also sleep with the tv on very low volume tho . Read a book relax , and don’t worry it’s a phase , your not alone I hope this can help you but I know the best is a therapist but give the others a wirl .

Jun 08, 2018
I am 13 and it’s getting worse NEW
by: Anonymous

When I was younger, I had to share a room with my sister. When I was around 10, we got rid of the bunk bed that we were sleeping in and got a queen. The queen was for my sisters room when we would move in the house so I had to sleep in it with her until we moved in. 2 years later we moved in and I had my own room. I was so excited to sleep by myself and I did for maybe 3-5 nights and then slept with my mum. For the past year now, I ahve been sleeping with my mum. Whenever she asks me to sleep by myself I cry and cry so hard. I had a fear of darkness and I have watched almost every horror movie but, that’s not what I’m afraid of. I just can’t sleep by myself and today, I’m the morning my mum asked me to sleep by myself and I have cried all day. It’s like she and my sister and dad make fun of me whenever I get anxious which just makes it worse because I will want to cry even more. I am so sad right now and I don’t know how I’m going to even try to sleep by myself tonight. My mum and dad usually come home by 5 or 6 maybe that’s why I miss them ?? I don’t know. She is threatening me taht she will tell all my friends and tell the school councillor but I’m not a baby! I am one of the most popular and funniest girls at school and I’m fine sleeping at friends houses. Lately, I’ve been so irritated by everything my whole family says. Always making fun of me and telling everyone I can’t sleep by myself but ITS NOT MY FAULT! I don’t know what’s wrong with me

Jun 12, 2018
I feel the same NEW
by: Anonymous

iam 13 and I can't sleep by mysel. its a real problem for me and my parents. irony know what to do!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jul 13, 2018
sleeping disorder NEW
by: malcolm

Unqualified, no experience, but has she ever had a comfort blanket or stuffed animal to sleep with? Has she always come into your room?

Nov 26, 2018
I'm 16 and I tried everything I know, help. NEW
by: Anonymous

I'm 16 now and I can't sleep alone. Since I was little I always shared a room with my sister because we just simply didn't have enough rooms. I had many horrible nightmares when I was a kid, about murder, isolation, being put up for adoption (my worst fear as a child). I eventually learned that the nightmares dissappeared when I slept next to my mom. Since almost 4 years now my bed just broke in the middle and I couldn't sleep their so I went to sleep with my mum. The problem now is that we now have enough beds, but I still can't fall asleep when I don't sleep next to my mom. I hate it. I just have to close my eyes and my breath becomes quicker, my hands get sweaty and I panic. Same when I wake up alone in the middle of the night. I have anxiety and depression, so thinking good thoughts before bed is kinda complicated. I started to listen to music but that only works half of the time + now I get anxious when everything's quiet around me. I know that I get tired when I eat sweets, but I don't want to make that a habit. I tried leaving the lights on, music, reading before bed, no electronic devices an hour before bed but nothing works. I stay awake. Sometimes I try to force me into getting to sleep but then I concentrate so much that I just stay awake.
I also can't fall asleep again if I wake up in the middle of the night alone. I stay awake until 5 or 6 am and then I can peacefully sleep again.
I could function with 3 to 4 hours of sleep and caffeine but I have to wake up at 6 if I want to get to school on time.
I'm currently doing my A levels right now and I wonder if It's worth it risking a good night's sleep and being tired in school.
I am also a very sensitive child, I always have, and I hate horror storys so I avoid them at all costs. I'm not necessary scared of what lurks in the dark, darkness just unsettles me, I can't relaxe and I threat being alone with my thoughts.
I will move out in ca. 1 1/2 years and I am so scared of not being able to sleep. So I tried to sleep alone. Results were that I slept 5 hours in 4 days, got the flu, was extremely moody and tired, every movement hurt and I failed two tests. Help.

Nov 26, 2018
My 13-year old can’t have sleep overs or sleep out NEW
by: Anonymous

My daughter has so much anxiety about sleeping with others besides her own family.

We have been working with a therapist. But, she is missing out on so many things. While I have tried to reassure she isn’t "strange", it’s very difficult for her.

She hasn’t been able to go to any sleep-away camps or school trips, or even sleeping at a friends house. There’s an 8th grade school trip to Washington DC in about 4 months and I really hope she has the opportunity.

Dec 31, 2018
Hi I’m a 12 year old girl and I can’t sleep NEW
by: Hi I have struggles

Hi I’m a 12 yr old girl and I can’t sleep in the room by myself! Every once in a while I cry about me not sleeping by myself I feel like a baby! My younger 8 yr old sister sleeps all by herself and I sleep with my parents! My mom try’s to comfort me, my dad just always says WHEN R U NOT GONNA SLEEP WITH US LIKE A BABY!! he doesn’t understand, I do want to sleep in my own room but I cannot! And I have no idea! I have seen a councler and she didn’t help! I just really want to die and I wish I wasn’t alive! I’m crying when I’m writing this and I am sad pls help me

Jan 01, 2019
im 13 years old and cant sleep by myself
by: Anonymous

right now it is school holidays for me and i got home a few hours ago from my mums house to my dads i wish i had stayed at my mums house because i can sleep on my own there but when im at my dads i cant sleep on my own. my dad just walked into his room (the one im in right now) and said which room are you sleeping in and i just looked at him and said nooo and then he went into my room to sleep then i texed my mum and said "i wish i had stayed with you" and she said texed back saying "you should have" then i said "i cant beause you have to go to work" (and i hate going to her work i get bored so easily there) then i responded "i dont like going to work with you" then she said "too bad". and now im balling my eyes out while writing this. also i wanted to have a great year and its the first day of 2019 and im already having shit year so thats great! i hate my self.

Feb 05, 2019
My daughter (13) will not/can not sleep on her own and it's destroying my marriage NEW
by: (un)Justifiably Angry

My child is 13. From an early age, she has had trouble sleeping alone. From her first time in the crib, being retrieved by my wife for crying, right up through last night, 13-years later. My daughter has only 3 or 4 times ever put herself to bed. Usually, staring at a phone screen until she passed out. My wife lays down with her every night, and then awakes hours later and tries to return to her (our) bedroom. If my child awakes, she comes in and says, "had a bad dream," "I tried to sleep but couldn't," and my wife brings our daughter into our bed. If I walk her back to her room and do not give her the option of staying, she will lay down and usually fall back asleep until morning. So I constantly feel this is a 'training' issue and not a chemical/overtly emotional issue. But, I don't know.

I find myself in a sexless marriage (the child may be awake/walk in, etc), a fatigued marriage (no one is sleeping well for years), and a frustrated marriage (neither of us has any real idea or direction for this).

I am willing to purchase lights, sound machines, whatever. But, I am starting to wonder if I can live in this environment, but then I can't leave my wife to live in a state of unending sleep deprivation.

As embarrassing as this is, I am finding myself becoming angry at my 13-yr old child for 'stealing' years of my marriage. I try to read about parents prioritizing themselves and their (our) relationship, but we still have to care for this lovely child, she is just 13. I am spiraling between feelings of resentment, frustration, selfishness, and fatigue.

I found this site out of desperate google searches for solutions.

Feb 08, 2019
i’m 14 i cannot sleep alone. im hopeless.
by: Anonymous

i’m about to be 15, and i still cant sleep alone.
i haven’t been able to sleep alone since i was
little. i’ve slept in my mom’s room for as long
as i can remember. i used to be terrified of being
alone. now i’m not so much scared, i just cant sleep.
im fine being alone for the most part, but
for some reason when it comes to sleeping
i cant do it! i have tried reading, hot baths, essential
oils, putting electronics away hours before sleep, etc. i’ve
tried everything and i’m so stressed out. i’ve tried pills too,
but that’s not something i’d like to rely on.

it’s so embarrassing sleeping with your mom..
i want to be independent. what will i do when i move
out? just not sleep?

i desperately need help ! i feel so hopeless and
embarrassed. my friends know i still sleep with
my mom, but they are very supportive and know it
makes me feel safer and calmer. i’ve had to share
beds with them before at sleepovers, and i felt
fine for the most part i guess. i just feel at ease when
someone’s in the room next to me. ik sleeping
with pets might help but i have none unfortunately.


i’ve always had sleeping problems but it’s gotten
extreme. i’ve gone days without sleep!! i
need help! please.

if anyone is in a similar situation, or has any
advice to give please message me on instagram
@peachypiiee

Mar 16, 2019
SOLVED NEW
by: Chester

She can sleep with me.

Mar 17, 2019
Any solutions found?
by: Anonymous

I have to say that it is such a relief to know that we are by far not the only ones dealing with this. I started reading all the comments and will have to visit a few times to read them all but I didn't see any solutions. I see people addign their stories to the list.

Was wondering if anyone has found any resources, suggestions, persons to help.

I have to say I am nearly 50 and don't like sleeping alone and have always had an issue since I was my daughters age. I was "forced" to live by myself for almost 2 years and it was challenging at night but I did do it. I can't say I have ever got great sleep and don't want my daughter going down the same path which she is already.

Looking for help.

Mar 17, 2019
Any solutions found?
by: Anonymous

I have to say that it is such a relief to know that we are by far not the only ones dealing with this. I started reading all the comments and will have to visit a few times to read them all but I didn't see any solutions. I see people adding their stories to the list.

Was wondering if anyone has found any resources, suggestions, persons to help.

I have to say I am nearly 50 and don't like sleeping alone and have always had an issue since I was my daughters age. I was "forced" to live by myself for almost 2 years and it was challenging at night but I did do it. I can't say I have ever got great sleep and don't want my daughter going down the same path which she is already.

Looking for help.

Apr 03, 2019
I am 11 and have anxiety and this is me NEW
by: Anonymous

I am 11 and have this problem, I have slept on my parent's floor for 3 years and have tried sleeping in my room!! but I just can... I know the only reason is that there is no one on the floor below me and I am scared of throwing up! and I feel like I am missing out as they are laughing in their room... I do hope this makes sense.... i am scared of telling my parents why I can't sleep in my own room and my friends mock me for it please help me...

Apr 03, 2019
Update on my daughters Sleep Issue
by: Original Blogger From 2011

I am the original post. I wish I could say that I have the answer. However, I do not. What I can tell you is, your daughter or son will work it out, they will sleep on their own.
To the man "(un)justifiably angry", I say hang in there because you and your wife will have "your time", this issue is Temporary. It will get better and there is light at the end of the tunnel.
I understand how tired, anxious and angry it can make parents feel, however the anxiety the child is feeling is REAL, it is so REAL to them.
My daughter who I wrote this post about, is now 21, she has a 1 bedroom apartment and is finishing up her Bachelors Degree, she lives alone. She did it, I think in this very sometimes scary world that we live in, these young minds "think too much" they lay in bed and have quiet time, that is when the mind starts over thinking, the "what if's".
There is a type of newer therapy called "EMDR" I have seen this helpful in some kids. It may be worth a try.
On another note, my second child is a senior in High School, he still has a blankey and his favorite stuffed animal. I don't tease, I don't take it away, bottom line if that is his security then so be it... He does sleep in his own bed on his own, but it took time.
If you are a child struggling with this Sleep Issue, look back at all of these comments and realize this is a very very common issue, and every single one gets through it. You will sleep on your own, it will just take some time and you are not abnormal. You are not. Hang in there and talk to your parents, share this blog.

Jun 19, 2019
This blog is helpful, is anyone out there
by: Anonymous

Hi! Wow! I realized how long ago this was started and I am very late lol! I’m 12 years old and have trouble sleeping in my own bed at my mom’s house. At my dad’s house I am fine and am able to calm myself down. A reason to that could be because my mom moved out and my dad kept the old house I’ve been at since I was born. I’ve only been at my mom’s house for almost a year. I feel more comfortable and safe in my mom’s bed where I am able to calm down and know my mom is safe. My worry is something bad happening to my mom in her sleep and me not being able to help her. I’ve been sleeping with her for a few months and am able to go to sleepovers and I can sleep by myself if I HAVE TO, but I stress and don’t sleep well. So if anyone is still on here I really need someone’s help! Thanks

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Welcome! This site is continuously being created by students of Dr. William C. Dement's Sleep And Dreams course at Stanford University.

We made this site as a call to action for people all over the world to live healthier, happier, safer, and more productive lives by learning about their own sleep. We have faith that reading the information provided on this site will motivate you to be smart about your sleep deprivation and strategic about your alertness in order to live life to your fullest, most energetic potential.

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